Loving Lydia

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by Leenie Brown


  “Your letter, Miss Lydia.” Darcy withdrew the folded missive from his pocket and handed it to her. “Again, I thank you for the privilege of reading the beginning of it.”

  “You did not read the last paragraph?” she asked as she slipped the letter into her reticule.

  “Not a word of it.”

  Elizabeth watched the exchange with interest. Lydia was so different and yet the same since her trip to London. There was a softening of her boisterous edges as the small thank you to Darcy demonstrated so well.

  “We should like to view some muslin.” Lydia looked to her companions, Kitty and Georgiana, who both nodded. “And Miss Darcy would like to see what sorts of music might be acquired here in Meryton.” She glanced at Mrs. Annesley. “If that would be acceptable to you.”

  “I think those are fine items for which to look,” Darcy replied.

  Elizabeth was quite impressed by her sister’s demeanor until they were just about to go in search of their first store.

  “You have still not told me why you need to gather your reserve?” She fluttered her lashes at Darcy and smiled.

  “Ah… well…” Darcy began haltingly, “that has to do with the fact that a particular member of the militia is returned from town to Meryton.”

  Lydia gasped, and her hand flew to her mouth. “I do hope he is returned!”

  “I beg your pardon?” Elizabeth’s reply was quick. Why would her sister wish to see Mr. Wickham after the way he had treated them?

  “Well, I should like to see the bruises the colonel and Mr. Darcy gave him. I am certain it would be very romantic to witness the defense of one’s honour. And should Mr. Darcy not be able to find his reserve, we might get to witness not just the traces of a former altercation.”

  “I am certain I would not like to see him or his bruises,” Georgiana said.

  Elizabeth did not miss the small look of apology that passed from Georgiana to her brother.

  “It is not that I think myself unable to see him,” Georgiana added quickly. “I just do not think it proper to find such injuries to be pleasing.”

  “No, not at all,” Mrs. Annesley encouraged. “Nor should one wish to be reminded of one’s folly.”

  The comment was said very softly, and the accompanying look was just as gentle.

  Lydia gasped, a look of mortification spreading across her face for a moment before being tucked away. “I had not thought of it as such. You are very right, Mrs. Annesley. I should not like to be reminded of my foolishness.”

  “Nor do you wish to have it broadcast about,” Mrs. Annesley continued in the same calm tone.

  “No, no. I am sure I do not,” Lydia agreed. “I am certain I do not wish to see him at all. Indeed, I wish he were still in London.”

  “Richard would be pleased to hear you say so,” Darcy added.

  That sealed the fate of wishing to see either Mr. Wickham or his bruises.

  “He is not even here,” Elizabeth whispered when her younger sisters and Georgiana, accompanied by Mrs. Annesley, had moved ahead of them by a few paces, “and still the colonel is seeing to Lydia’s improvement.”

  “It is remarkable,” Jane agreed. “As is Mrs. Annesley,” she added.

  “Indeed, she is,” Darcy agreed. “My sister was certain she and Mrs. Annesley could help me see to Miss Lydia’s continued improvement as I promised Richard I would do.”

  This was not news to either Elizabeth or Jane. Darcy had told Elizabeth of his promise to Richard, and Elizabeth had, in turn, shared it with Jane.

  Elizabeth pressed her hand more firmly on Darcy’s arm at the sound of his soft but heavy sigh.

  He turned questioning eyes towards her.

  “I, too, wish he were here,” she whispered, earning herself a smile of appreciation.

  Ahead of them, Lydia was standing in front of a store peering through its many-paned window with Kitty on her one side and Georgiana on her other. Mary stood behind them with Miss Annesley, looking as if she was embarrassed to be seen in front of a shop window.

  “Does Miss Mary not enjoy shopping?”

  Apparently, Darcy had noticed Mary’s unease as well.

  “Mary prefers a list of items to be purchased and a rapid walk from merchant to merchant before meandering home while reading, satisfied to know that everything she needs will be delivered shortly,” Jane replied.

  “Save for the few small treats she might have purchased to eat while she walks,” Elizabeth added. “Those she will carry, of course.”

  “A lady with purpose,” Darcy muttered, “is not a bad thing.”

  “Unless she thinks everyone should conform to her way of thinking,” Jane cautioned. “That would be Mary’s weakness.”

  They had nearly reached the shop where their sisters stood when to Elizabeth’s dismay, the group of officers they had seen, crossed the street.

  “We have only just arrived back at Longbourn,” Kitty was saying to Captain Denny as Elizabeth and Darcy joined her. “And we thought to show our friend the high street. Have you seen if there is any new music at the bookseller’s?”

  “I cannot say I have inquired.” Denny shifted and glanced uneasily at Darcy. “At least, I have not since I sent my sister that piece of music last month. You remember the one, do you not?”

  “Oh, indeed, I do,” Kitty replied, smiling broadly. “It would be lovely if they still had a copy.”

  “We shall have to make certain to stop there,” Elizabeth inserted before extending her greeting to the assembled officers.

  Wickham glanced first at her face and then the hand which lay on Darcy’s arm. “I understand that you and Miss Bennet have happy news. Allow me to extend my joy.” He gave each of them a small bow of his head.

  The comment surprised Elizabeth, although not because he knew of her betrothal – for, if Lady Lucas knew, everyone knew. No, she was surprised by the civility with which he greeted them and the fact that he would mention hers or Jane’s betrothal at all.

  “We only wanted to wish you a happy return to the neighbourhood.” Captain Saunders wore a pleasant smile, though his eyes did dart uneasily toward Darcy before returning to the rest of the group. Then, he and his companions bowed and took their leave, wandering down the street toward the inn.

  “Well,” said Bingley, “that was unexpected.”

  “His bruises looked impressive,” Lydia whispered with a pleased smile for Darcy. “Well done.”

  “We do not congratulate gentlemen on how well they can bruise another,” Mrs. Annesley inserted. “Not even if those bruises are well-deserved.” She winked at Lydia. “We have muslins to see.”

  “Muslins!” Darcy said, sending an amused smile in Bingley’s direction.

  “Indeed!” Bingley agreed, with a smirk of his own. “I am all anticipation” he teased.

  “You poor men,” Jane consoled. “What trials you endure!”

  “And happily so,” Bingley assured her.

  “Very happily so,” Darcy agreed before lifting Elizabeth’s hand and placing a kiss on her knuckles bringing to mind what he had promised her while they were still in London – to endure every possible irritation for her sake.

  However, as she stepped into the shop, Elizabeth was not sure if the kiss was because of the gentlemen they had met outside or the cries of delight from three young ladies admiring a selection of muslin.

  Chapter 5

  To Elizabeth’s surprise, Darcy seemed to be settling easily into the neighbourhood. He had greeted a few gentlemen by name when they had been in Meryton three days ago.

  “We went shooting together,” he had told her.

  He had patiently borne all of her mother’s happy exclamations each day when a neighbour had come to call while Darcy was also in the sitting room. Then, he had been the one to suggest dancing to Sir William when they were at Lucas Lodge for dinner last evening.

  It was remarkable the change he had made, and her heart thrilled to know that he endured it all for her. She was certa
in there was not another man in all of England who was as wonderful as her Mr. Darcy.

  Today, however, he seemed a little out of sorts. His smile was not as quick as it had been since his arrival, and he was quiet – not that silence was something which was foreign to him. It was just that it felt to her as if the silence was a heavy blanket he had to carry.

  “The sun is warm today,” Elizabeth said.

  Darcy nodded. “It is.”

  Elizabeth held his arm a little more firmly, moving to walk closer to him as if somehow doing so might help him bear whatever burden he carried. His lips curled up softly as he looked down at her, and the same soft pleasure of his smile shone in his eyes.

  “I have had a letter from Richard,” he said after a few silent paces down the road.

  Jane and Bingley, as well as Caroline and Sir Matthew, were somewhere behind them, while Georgiana and Elizabeth’s other sisters were ahead of them. None were close enough to hear a word of Darcy and Elizabeth’s conversation.

  “I wished to tell you right away, but…” His eyes left hers as he looked toward the group in front of them.

  “You did not want Lydia to know?”

  He nodded. “I cannot allow her to read it. The details are,” he shook his head, “disturbing, but I have promised to share with her when he writes to me.”

  “Was there any news which was not disturbing? Perhaps you can share that bit with her?” Elizabeth prodded hopefully.

  “There were a few descriptions of his accommodations and a fellow officer or two. It was all written just as Richard would tell me if he were in my study enjoying a glass of port with me.”

  Elizabeth watched as a small smile played at the corners of Darcy’s mouth while, she assumed, he contemplated his cousin.

  “He has been injured, but it is not severe. A few stitches above his left eye is all. There was an altercation at a tavern, and a window was broken. He assures me it will only make his appearance more fetching should it scar for it is so small and distinguished looking.” He chuckled softly before sobering once again. “But I cannot tell your sister about that or the arrests or people who have died.”

  “Then do not tell her. Share with her the tales of the officers and tell her that the rest was about things which would surely bore her to tears. She does not wish to read about daily duties, and I am certain the awful bits were, sadly, just part of your cousin’s daily duties.” Elizabeth squeezed Darcy’s arm tightly. How horrible it must be for him to have someone so close to him in harm’s way. She had never really contemplated how it must be for some who had loved ones who were on the continent, in a far away colony where there was unrest, or sailing with the navy, let alone here at home locked in a disagreement with fellow countrymen.

  “That would not be too great a prevarication, would it?” Darcy asked.

  Elizabeth shook her head. “I do not believe it would be. You may tell her about his cut if you wish. I do not think that would cause her too much distress, and she must know that there are dangers.”

  Darcy expelled a great breath, the weight of resignation and grave duty were in the sound. “I believe you are correct. Shall we catch up to them?”

  With Elizabeth’s permission, they quickened their pace and were soon able to overtake the young ladies ahead of them. Of course, the fact that their sisters had stopped for Kitty to retie a bootlace did help Darcy and Elizabeth’s effort.

  “We must turn back soon,” Elizabeth said as they reached their sisters.

  “But before we do,” Darcy began, “I wished to tell you that I have had a letter from my cousin.”

  “Richard?” Georgiana said eagerly.

  Elizabeth looked quickly to Darcy. She had not thought of how his sister might receive this news. Indeed, he had not mentioned it as something which lay heavy on his heart. He had surely thought of his sister, but it was his concern for Lydia that grieved him the most.

  Darcy flashed his sister a quick, tight smile and nodded. “I did not bring it to share because it was not all fit for the eyes of young ladies.”

  “Oh, I should think it is not!” Lydia said, surprising them all. “I would imagine that gentlemen speak to each other in letters as they do when they have their port after dinner.”

  “What do you mean?” Mary asked.

  “Well,” said Lydia as the large group started moving forward again, “we ladies are sent away, and I imagine it is so the gentlemen can use vulgar language and speak of indelicate things. Is that not what you do?”

  Darcy looked from her inquisitive face to the others who also peeked at him. “I suppose, sometimes that is the case.”

  Elizabeth could not help but smile at his uncertain, hesitating tone and the wary expression he wore. It was as if he were uncertain what Lydia might ask him next.

  “What did your cousin have to say?” Lydia asked, seemingly satisfied with Darcy’s response.

  “He told me about the innkeepers just as he told you. Then, he mentioned a fellow – a Captain G – who likes to sing hymns when they go out to patrol but who, after he has had a pint or two, also sings the bawdiest songs Richard has ever heard.”

  “I can see why that would not be something a young lady should read,” muttered Mary.

  “Oh, indeed,” Darcy agreed. “There was one thing which happened that is not of a pleasant nature to have to report. It seems that during a disagreement between some gentlemen one night at a tavern, a window was broken, and Richard received a cut during the dispute. As a result, he required a few stitches to close the wound, but he assures me that it makes him look very distinguished,” Darcy added quickly over the gasps of the four young ladies in their group.

  “He is well?” Lydia asked, turning fearful eyes toward Darcy.

  Elizabeth wished to gather her into her arms at the sight of her distress. She glanced up at Darcy. His throat moved up and down as he swallowed while he nodded.

  “He assures me he is well.”

  Lydia’s shoulders relaxed as she expelled a quiet, relieved breath. “That is very good news then,” she said after a moment of silence. “Was there anything else?”

  “Nothing I can share,” Darcy answered.

  “He spoke of fighting?” Lydia asked quietly.

  “He did.”

  “I knew that there could be some,” she added. “He told me before he left.” She shrugged. “No one wants to lose their livelihood or their lives.”

  “He told you that?”

  Lydia nodded. “I am not a child, Mr. Darcy.” She pulled her shoulders straight. “But I thank you for not sharing any of the fightings with me aside from the colonel’s injury.”

  They walked on for some time in silence. Elizabeth was impressed by how Lydia had accepted the news. There were no tears or fits of nerves. Her response had been more reminiscent of how Jane might react rather than how their mother might — which had always been Lydia’s normal wont up until now. Lydia was improving. How had Colonel Fitzwilliam known to share such serious matters with her before he left? Elizabeth would have expected him to assure Lydia that he would be well and would return soon. She had not thought he would tell her about the grave nature of his duty. Once again, she was struck by just how very good Colonel Fitzwilliam was for her sister.

  Darcy fished in his pocket and withdrew his handkerchief. Then, he touched Lydia’s shoulder and gave it to her.

  So, there were tears. Elizabeth had not seen them, but Darcy had. She smiled up at him as he wiped at the corners of his own eyes with his hand. Her brow furrowed. Was he thinking of his cousin?

  He tipped his head toward Lydia and then touched his heart.

  She nodded her understanding before laying her head against his shoulder. He was still thinking of her sister — her youngest, most troublesome sister — and his heart was touched. The thought could only endear him more firmly to her. He truly was the best of men.

  Chapter 6

  Darcy settled into a comfortable chair in Netherfield’s drawing room. Das
h lay at his feet, and Oliver stalked them both from the far side of the room. Darcy chuckled over how the curious creature would come within feet of Dash but then scurry away as soon as Dash flinched. The fur above Dash’s eyes was moving as he watched Oliver walk to and fro. Eventually, the two might become friends as Bingley predicted, but at present, it appeared as if that was not going to happen any time soon.

  “That was not as dreadful as I expected,” Caroline Bingley said as she took a seat on a settee. She had attended the soiree at Lucas Lodge after her arrival at Netherfield, but today was the first day she had decided to call on any of the neighbors. “The Bennets seem to improve upon acquaintance, though…” She stopped speaking when Sir Matthew coughed softly.

  “There are many in this world who pose some sort of challenge to our sensibilities,” Sir Matthew said.

  “Oh, indeed, there are!” Caroline agreed. “Mrs. Bennet is an acquired taste.”

  Sir Matthew shrugged but said nothing.

  “She was very welcoming of you, as she should be,” Caroline added, placing a hand on her betrothed’s arm. “It is not every day that she has a baronet in her home.” Caroline turned to Darcy, her smile somewhat smug. “That is what she said.”

  “It is true,” Darcy replied.

  Caroline was more accepting of things than he ever remembered her being, but she had still not forgiven him either for rejecting her or for having caused her current betrothed state. Therefore, he would endure her small jabs for as long as she felt it necessary to punish him.

  Darcy gave a small shake of his head when Sir Matthew raised an eyebrow in question. The man had met with both Bingley and Darcy within moments of his arrival to discuss how challenging having Caroline under the same roof as them might be. The man was exceptionally good at directing Caroline, but even more surprising was the fact that he did not seem daunted by the task. He had the patience of Job. Nothing seemed to ruffle his calm exterior.

  “I am not that important,” Sir Matthew said, grasping Caroline’s hand which lay on his arm. “I am fortunate to have inherited a title and an estate.”

 

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