by Sarina Dorie
“Wow, Dreambeam, you’re such a great friend. You’re always looking out for us,” Appletini said.
Lemondrop nuzzled my neck affectionately. “Yay! Dreambeam is the best. I bet Princess Stardrop wouldn’t look out for us like that.”
I stepped forward and sniffed the pan of muffins. The Cupcake King pried one out and peeled back the paper. The aromatic blend of carrots and apples rose in swirls of steam and tingled in my nostrils. I chomped into the oat muffin, savoring the flavors of whole grain and real fruit. I swallowed. I didn’t feel any different.
“Do I have a horn? Any wings?” I asked. A penchant for evil?
“Hmm. That’s strange,” The-Not-So-Evil Cupcake King said, scratching at his graying hair. “I thought all ponies wanted to become pegacorns. Maybe it isn’t your deepest desire to become one.”
I rolled my eyes. I could have told him that.
“Oh, but it’s my greatest desire to become a pegacorn,” Appletini said.
“Me too,” said Lemondrop, approaching the muffins.
The snort behind me made me turn.
Rising up over the edge of the cliff, Princess Stardrop flapped her wings. “Nay. Not if I have anything to say about it.” She charged forward, laughing maniacally, eyes glowing hot pink.
The unicorns skittered back behind the Cupcake King. He held the tray of muffins up protectively like a shield. If there was one thing I couldn’t allow it would be for Dim-drops tyranny to continue. I would not allow this day to end in more tragedy.
I screamed at her, “Eat malt balls and choke, you old nag.”
I lunged at her just as she passed, my hooves colliding with her delicate, pink wings. One of them snapped with a satisfying crunch. My full weight came down on her back. My body draped over hers. The impact forced her down and onto her side. She rolled, taking me down onto the quartz with her. We tumbled closer to the edge, limbs tangled. If only I could get in a good kick at her horn.
Lemondrop shrieked. “No, Dreambeam. You’re going to—”
We fell over the edge, legs still tangled. I managed a few kicks to her face, one of the blows solidly cracking against her horn. She twisted away, shrieking in agony as the wind rushed against us. We dove into a pocket of white clouds, our bodies separating. None of them turned into beds of cotton candy to take me slowly down. Through the haze, I could no longer see my adversary.
The pounding of my heart slowed and I calmed myself. I had eaten the magic muffin. Did I want to become a pegacorn and fly home to lead my people? I could change this world. I could give this world normal apples and stallions. But if I were leader, how would I be any different imposing my idea of perfection on them? The other ponies liked insipid songs and eating candy. It was best to leave Ponydom to the new breed of pegacorns. I had a feeling Appletini and Lemondrop were too sisterly—and naive—to become as manipulative as Princess Dim-drop.
But where did that leave me? I could become a pegacorn, too, I was certain, if I just wanted to become one bad enough. But in my heart, I knew I didn’t. I wanted to be a pony. A real pony.
The rush of wind subsided into stillness. I no longer tumbled and my body seemed to right itself. The frantic flailing of my feet in air met substance, first the resistance of what may have been liquid, then something more solid. I ran through pockets of misty clouds, the earthy aroma of dirt and grass tickling my nostrils.
I exited from the swirls of vapor and halted, staring in wonder at the world around me. Everything was painted in earth tones, the grass a natural green and the clouds in the sky darkening with the coming of rain. The leaves in the trees were the perfect shade of viridian and the trunks brown. It was just as I had always imagined the world was supposed to be. I felt like I’d just woken from a bad dream.
Tears filled my eyes, my heart overflowing with joy. I was so lost in the beauty of the natural color scheme that I didn’t realize I was being watched.
A snort at the edge of the trees caught my attention. A black horse with long graceful limbs pranced forward, ears twitching. Great. Here I was in the Land of Non-Fluorescent Ponies while I was still a freak. Feeling self-conscious, I dipped my head down, expecting my eyes to encounter the puke-a-rific orange of my pelt and chunky ankles.
I snorted in surprise when my eyes took in the slender ankles below me. My hide was dappled gray and white like that of a real pony. No, not a pony. A horse. I was a real horse! All my dreams had come true. It was just as the Not-So-Evil Cupcake King had said.
The other horse thudded closer, warm breath rising into the mist around us. My nostrils flared momentarily as they caught the musky male scent. By this point, I realized the horse was no pony. He was definitely a stallion.
“Well, hello beautiful,” I said, my voice coming out a breathy whinny rather than words. Now this was heaven.
THE END
If you have enjoyed your reading of this story, see other books the author has for free and for purchase on her website:
www.sarinadorie.com
Or Sarina Dorie’s Amazon Author Page:
Amazon.com (US)
https://www.amazon.com/Sarina-Dorie/e/B00Q7XYZMI/
Amazon.co.uk (UK)
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Sarina-Dorie/e/B00Q7XYZMI
Amazon.de (Germany)
https://www.amazon.de/Sarina-Dorie/e/B00Q7XYZMI
Amazon.fr (France)
https://www.amazon.fr/Sarina-Dorie/e/B00Q7XYZMI
Sign up for Sarina Dorie’s newsletter:
Readers can hear updates about current writing projects, news about upcoming novels and will be sent free short stories as they become available by signing up for Sarina Dorie’s newsletter at:
http://eepurl.com/4IUhP
Find more funny short stories by Sarina Dorie on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Sarina-Dorie/e/B00Q7XYZMI
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sarina Dorie has sold over 150 short stories to markets like Analog, Daily Science Fiction, Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, Orson Scott Card’s IGMS, Cosmos, and Abyss and Apex. Her stories and published novels have won humor contests and Romance Writer of America awards. She has sold three novels to publishers. Her steampunk romance series, The Memory Thief and her collections, Fairies, Robots and Unicorns—Oh My! and Ghosts, Werewolves and Zombies—Oh My! are available on Amazon, along with a dozen other novels she has written in the Womby’s School for Wayward Witches series.
A few of her favorite things include: gluten-free brownies (not necessarily glutton-free), Star Trek, steampunk aesthetics, fairies, Severus Snape, Captain Jack Sparrow and Mr. Darcy.
By day, Sarina is a public-school art teacher, artist, belly dance performer and instructor, copy editor, fashion designer, event organizer and probably a few other things. By night, she writes. As you might imagine, this leaves little time for sleep.
You can find info about her short stories and novels on her website:
www.sarinadorie.com
Sign up for Sarina Dorie’s mailing list and get free short stories, advanced reader copies, and be able to participate in giveaways and contests only for people on her mailing list.
http://eepurl.com/dEd4oL