Was Nick going to arrest her? No. He couldn’t do that. He could have lived with Harvey being attacked and falling to his death as divine retribution for his words, actions and utter lack of humanity. It was the collective decision to end his life once they realised that he wasn’t dead that tortured him.
Nick also had to factor in Jack. He knew that his brother had been confronted and accused of rape on Snowdon. He had left him, and Harvey had been murdered. Jack must have suspected that the two incidents were in some way connected but had decided to keep quiet, even lying about which track they were on. But how long would he maintain that silence?
To say that Nick had put his sobriety in jeopardy was the understatement of the year. And the thought of a huge glass of vodka to press pause on the endless chatter in his mind felt overwhelmingly appealing. However, he played it forwards and saw himself in a detox or rehab centre in a month’s time. He just needed to get to a meeting.
Amanda shifted uncomfortably on the sofa and looked over at him.
‘What do we do?’ she whispered.
‘I don’t know. I really don’t know.’ Nick began to feel his emotions getting the better of him. He was lost.
He had allowed himself to fall in love with her. And she was everything he thought he wanted. All the cheesy romance of songs and films suddenly made sense for the first time. He had always thought that stuff was nonsense. However, he had felt it. Deep in the pit of his stomach, down in the middle of his empty soul. He remembered a quote from his GCSE English Literature class. Shakespeare, he thought. Love was like a sickness and its cure together. Like rain and sun, like cold and heat. He had never taken any notice of the words.
‘Do you need to arrest me? Do I hand myself in?’ Amanda shook her head at the thought of it.
Nick made a decision.
‘No. Harvey Pearson’s murder will just go down as one of those unexplained murders that you read about in the newspaper every few years.’
‘How ...?’ Amanda bit her lip as the tears came again.
‘I have to forget everything you just told me. And I have to bury anything that links you or your friends to Snowdon that day.’
‘You can’t do that. You’re a bloody police officer, Nick!’ Amanda looked at him in disbelief.
‘That man raped you with no moral conscience. And when confronted, he thought it was funny. He could have gone on to do that again. And I’ve seen rapists progress to far worse.’
‘Don’t you think what we did was wrong?’
‘I don’t know. But I do know that none of you should go to prison for someone like Harvey Pearson.’
‘What happens if someone finds out what you’ve done? You’ll go to prison.’
‘Then you’d better not tell anyone.’ Nick’s tone was serious. He was putting his liberty in her hands.
Then more silence came as thoughts rushed in and out.
‘What about us?’ Amanda asked.
‘I don’t know.’
‘Maybe I should just move away and make a new start?’ Amanda said.
He wasn’t sure if she was just testing the water to see if he would agree with her suggestion.
‘I just need some time, you know?’
‘Yeah, of course. We both do.’
‘I need some time and I need to keep sober. And so do you.’
Amanda nodded.
CHAPTER 33
The atmosphere inside Incident Room One was sombre. The room was crammed full: every chair was taken, and latecomers were sitting on tables or propped against the back wall. Everyone wanted to help find Ella. Ruth was one of their own. Normally the room would have been full of chatter, but this was serious and everyone just wanted to get on with tracking down Gates and getting Ella back safely.
Sipping lukewarm coffee, Sian felt exhausted. Caffeine didn’t seem to be hitting the spot, but her adrenaline was keeping her going. It had been a long night, but she had managed a couple of hours of sleep at home. She had supported and comforted Ruth as much as she could. She couldn’t get the thought of Ella being with Gates out of her head. She looked over at the case board, where photos of Gates’s eight victims had been pinned with names, dates of birth and other details. It made her feel physically sick to think of a photo of Ella up on that board. She wouldn’t let that happen.
Looking tired and drawn, Sian watched as Drake got up and went to the front of the room. He waited for the room to settle. ‘Morning, everyone. As most of you know by now, Ruth Hunter’s daughter was kidnapped by Andrew Gates yesterday afternoon. Ruth is at home on compassionate leave, although I will be keeping her up to date with any developments. Gates is very dangerous and has no regard for human life. It goes without saying, but we need to do our best work in the next twenty-four hours.’ Drake looked over at Merringer. ‘Luke, what have we got?’
Sian watched as Luke stood and looked at the papers he was holding. She knew that he found it difficult to talk to such a crowded room. He went over to the computer and pulled up an image of a white Ford Escort van that had been burnt beyond all recognition.
‘Boss. The white Escort van that Gates had been driving was found burnt-out in Capel Curig, just outside Betws-y-Coed. A 2011 white transit van’ – Merringer clicked to an image of the transit van – ‘registration alpha-lima-six-one, foxtrot-bravo-delta, was stolen half a mile from where the Escort van was found.’
Sian scribbled down the make and number, but her mind was elsewhere. She had become so close to Ella and Ruth in recent months. They had become a little family. Ruth had joked that they were the archetypal ‘blended family.’ A lesbian couple with a daughter from a failed heterosexual marriage.
‘The owner discovered it had been stolen at around midnight last night. We know that Gates seems to be able to steal vans of a certain era without much trouble. ANPR cameras have been alerted, as have the armed patrols in the area.’ Merringer sat down.
Drake rose again. ‘We’re hoping to get helicopters in the area as soon as possible. Anything else?’
Sian looked at the notes of the intel she had been following up on. ‘We’re rechecking all known family and friends. Nothing so far. Nothing on Gwenda Chadwick’s bank cards or phone. Surveillance still on his home at Llantysilio in case he decides to retrieve anything he’s left behind. Uniformed officers are making regular checks on the house in Pentredwr.’
‘Do we think he will stick to his original MO and try to kill again?’ Merringer asked.
‘He’s got the taste for it, so there’s no reason to think that he won’t,’ Drake said.
There was a slight commotion as a uniformed officer came in and headed straight for Drake. They talked earnestly for a moment as Drake nodded and Sian could see that he was looking energised.
‘Right everyone. Gwenda Chadwick’s mobile phone has been active for the past half an hour. Using the GPS and mast triangulation, it seems that it is in a vehicle travelling east on the A5 and that vehicle has just crossed the border into England.’
Bingo! thought Sian. At last they had a concrete lead on Gates and presumably Ella’s whereabouts.
IT WAS GONE FOUR O’CLOCK by the time Ruth began to cut through the centre of Snowdonia Park. The heathland was desolate, daubed with a smattering of snow on the higher ground.
Without thinking, she clicked on the radio. ‘Santa Baby’ by Kylie Minogue was playing and its chirpy, sultry tone immediately grated her. It couldn’t be less appropriate, for fuck’s sake! She angrily pushed the button again and there was silence. Just the whirr of the road beneath her as she thought and processed and hoped. Was this just a wild goose chase? She didn’t have anything else to go on until Gates called her with a time and place to meet. That’s if he did call back. And Ruth wanted to be one step ahead of Gates for once.
Wintry trees lined the roadside like dancers poised to start their show. Their leaves had long gone, and their skeleton limbs seemed sinister. The sky had turned a gun-metal grey, although in the distance it was turning to blac
k. She hated the winter. Trees were lifeless with the odd dead leaf hanging in the wind. The skies were at best dismal and at worst fierce and angry. She didn’t even like snow. It didn’t glisten in the sun. It was crushed by muddy boots leaving brown scars.
The sound of her phone broke the darkness of her thoughts. It was Sian.
‘Hi. We’ve got a fix on Gwenda Chadwick’s mobile phone,’ she said.
‘Where?’ Ruth asked. She hoped Sian was going to say somewhere near Porthmadog, which would confirm her hunch about where Gates was holed up with Ella. There was a momentary glimmer of hope.
‘The last position was somewhere near Market Drayton on the Shropshire-Staffordshire border. We have no ID on the vehicle yet,’ she explained.
There was part of Ruth that wanted to spin a handbrake turn and head for Market Drayton at high speed. However, it didn’t feel right. She was still convinced that Gates was going to stay in places and areas that he knew. That was his MO so far. Despite the new intel, she felt compelled by her instinct that Borthrodyn Holiday Park was where Gates was hiding. If she was wrong, then at least there would be a huge police operation following Gwenda Chadwick’s mobile phone. She was on compassionate leave and wouldn’t be allowed anywhere near the operation anyway. Terrified that Ella could get caught up in an armed police operation against Gates, she knew she needed to check the Borthrodyn link herself.
‘Okay, thank you,’ Ruth said.
‘How you bearing up?’ Sian asked.
‘You know. Hanging on in there. Just ...’ Ruth said.
Sian paused for a moment. ‘Are you driving somewhere?’
Ruth wasn’t sure how or if to answer. ‘I’m checking something out.’
‘I don’t like the sound of that. Where are you going?’ Sian sounded worried.
‘Kerry and Andrew Gates had a baby girl called Heidi in 1995. Kerry was pregnant at their wedding. They went to Borthrodyn Holiday Park for their honeymoon.’
‘Where the hell is that, and why is it relevant?’ Sian snapped.
‘Porthmadog. On the second day they were there, the baby died from SIDS. It means that Borthrodyn is somewhere very significant for Gates. He sticks to where he knows and feels comfortable.’
‘What about the mobile-phone signal?’ Sian asked.
‘I don’t know. Drake won’t allow me to be anywhere near a police operation tracking Gates. I can’t just sit at home looking at the walls.’ Ruth thought for a moment. ‘Gates called me earlier.’
‘You’re meant to hand that information on to CID straight away!’ Sian reprimanded her.
‘I couldn’t. Gates told me that he wanted me to come and meet him alone. He implied that he would harm Ella if he found any hint of police anywhere.’
‘I’m assuming that he didn’t give any clues as to where and when?’
‘No. But he said something about “a child for a child.” As if he saw Ella and Heidi as comparable in some way. I’m clutching at straws because it’s all I’ve got.’
‘What are you going to do if they are there?’ Sian asked.
‘I’ll call it in. Don’t worry, I’m not going to go all Jodie Foster in Silence of the Lambs.’
‘Promise?’ Sian said with a tone of distrust.
‘I promise. I’m not stupid. I’ll ring you when I get there.’
CHAPTER 34
Rapping on the front door for the third time, Nick crouched and looked through the brass letterbox of Amanda’s front door. She hadn’t answered her phone. And now she wasn’t answering the door. He was in a panic. What if she had done something stupid?
Suicide was a constant spectre within AA. Those with some form of alcohol problem account for a third of all suicides in the UK. Amanda had been through so much in the past few months. The attack and then the murder. It would be enough to drive anyone to the brink of a breakdown or something more drastic. Of course, she could have just self-medicated herself into a stupor.
Fuck it. He pushed the key into the door and turned it. He would risk her anger for letting himself into her house unannounced. Glancing through the ground-floor rooms, she was nowhere to be seen. He bound up the stairs, two at a time, and went into the bedroom. The bed had been stripped but Amanda wasn’t there. Nothing in the spare room either.
Then something occurred to him. Pacing back into Amanda’s bedroom, he looked at her dressing table. It was clear. No jewellery, no perfume, moisturiser. Nothing. He frowned as he went to the wardrobe. It was empty.
Taking a breath, he sat on the bed for a moment collecting his thoughts. She had gone. And she hadn’t taken a small suitcase as if she was going away for a few days or even a week. It had all gone.
He took a pillow from the centre of the bed and smelt if for a second. Marc Jacobs Decadence. Her beautiful face loomed in his mind. She smiled and he looked into her big brown eyes. There was a pang within his torso that stabbed at him.
Walking slowly down the stairs, he noticed that the stylish architectural photos that had been on the wall were gone too. Then he noticed that the living room was the same. There were a few things left. The bulky stuff. The television, sofa and the table and chairs. In his desperation to find Amanda, he hadn’t noticed that her life was no longer here.
He couldn’t believe it. In the space of four hours, she had put her stuff in her car and vanished. Where? The only consoling thought was that if she was driving off somewhere to harm herself, she wouldn’t have bothered to spend all that time packing up her things.
Walking into the kitchen in a slight daze, he saw a note on the kitchen table. He must have missed it when he raced through the ground floor a few minutes before.
He took a moment before picking it up to read. He knew in his head that Amanda going somewhere else for a new start made logical sense. It was best for both of them. What he knew, what she had told him, was too much for them to be together, wasn’t it?
But the weight of his heart told him a completely different story. He loved her with all of his being. They had connected in a way that had revived his belief that he wasn’t an emotionally-retarded sociopath.
Reaching for the note, he began to read:
Hi Nick.
You’ll have guessed that I’ve packed most of my stuff and gone. My friend’s husband is going to come and collect everything else in the next few days.
I hope you understand that I have to move away. What we’ve shared together has been amazing and I do love you. But there is so much dark baggage that I fear that we wouldn’t survive it. And we might be okay for a while, but I think that eventually it would catch up with us. Does that make sense?
You’re an amazing person, you should know that. I know that sobriety is the only way for me, and you taught me that.
Take care of yourself,
Amanda x
Nick was crushed as he placed the letter down. What she had written made perfect sense. He didn’t want it to make perfect sense though.
Turning abruptly, he put the key on the table and left. He couldn’t bear to be in the house any longer.
Twenty minutes later, he moved slowly around the Co-op looking at the Christmas offers on mince pies, pigs in blankets, crackers and chocolates. Slade’s Christmas anthem played loudly as he went to pay for a pizza and six Diet Cokes. He had never felt more alone. He knew he needed to get himself to an AA meeting. He would feel better being amongst his tribe. He always did.
Walking across the car park, the icy wind bit into his face and hands. He eased himself into the car and put the key in the ignition.
Looking over at the shopping bag on the passenger seat, he spotted it sitting there. Crystal clear, shiny and beautiful. A new litre-bottle of vodka. It was almost as if he hadn’t remembered buying it. As if another part of him had pointed to the bottle behind the tills and made the decision for him.
He reached over and took the bottle in his hand.
IT WAS FIVE O’CLOCK by the time Sian, Merringer and Drake arrived at the service station just ou
tside Market Drayton. Drake had liaised with the police in Staffordshire, but it was agreed that North Wales Police would lead the operation.
With a mobile phone clamped to his ear, Drake was in the back of the unmarked BMW while Merringer and Sian were in the front.
Looking out at the black clouds that were rolling in, Sian’s thoughts went to Ella and what she must be going through, the overwhelming terror and desperation she would be feeling. Even though she wasn’t religious, she cast her thoughts into the sky and prayed that Ella would be returned safely. She would do anything for that. Hail Marys, Our Fathers, chants, the lot.
Brightly coloured signs advertised Costa Coffee, Burger King and M&S as families came and went into the main building for toilet breaks and food. A father came past wearing a red Santa hat and holding his daughter’s hand as they headed for the warmth of the service station. It made Sian’s feelings of helplessness so much worse.
Drake hung up the phone. ‘They’ve triangulated Gwenda Chadwick’s phone again. We’ve got it located somewhere in this area but uniformed officers from Staffordshire have done a sweep and can’t see any white transit vans.’
‘He could have switched vehicles?’ Sian suggested.
‘If they’re in here, they’re not getting out now,’ Drake said, determined.
Two Armed Response Units had been placed on the entry and exit. All vehicles coming in and out were being searched thoroughly. Officers from Llancastell CID were searching the service station itself. A helicopter was on standby a mile away, as were armed officers from Stoke-On-Trent’s CID. It felt to Sian that all bases were covered. But they’d been in this position before and Gates had seemed to be one step ahead of them at every juncture.
‘Sian, Luke. Have a scoot around and see if you can see anything.’
‘Yes, boss,’ Sian replied as she got out and pulled the collar of her coat up against the light rain that had just started.
The Dee Valley Killings Page 25