“Why’d you break up? Details!”
There was no way she was getting details. “It just didn’t work out.”
Natalie blew her hair off her forehead and rolled her eyes. “Thanks, that was such a great story. Well, how about the other girls?”
Peter raised an eyebrow. “I’m not discussing this with you. You do know you’re sixteen and I’m thirty, right?”
“Please,” Nat begged. “No TV, no movies, I need some entertainment in my life.”
Peter shook his head. She slumped in her chair but perked back up a moment later. “Okay, then, I’ll guess. That one with the short hair—what’s her name?”
“Ana,” Peter answered because he couldn’t think of a good reason not to. Ana had frozen in shock when she’d realized that they were leaving him behind. He’d opened his mouth to tell her that it would be all right—he’d be all right, as long as she and the others were safe—but there hadn’t been time.
Natalie watched him for a moment before a grin spread across her face. “You like Ana—I can tell!”
Peter shrugged noncommittally, but she clapped her hands and screeched. “So, what’d Cassie think of that?”
Peter decided to answer; he had a feeling she’d be hounding him all night if he didn’t. “She thought it was a good idea.”
“What?” Nat screamed in disbelief. “Really?”
Peter couldn’t help it; he laughed until tears rolled. Natalie grinned and jumped up to sit next to him. “So everyone was friends?”
“Yeah, everyone was friends,” Peter said. “Cassie’s probably my best friend.” Cassie knew more about him than anyone else in the world, even Ana.
“Were you guys in love, ever?”
“I was in love with her,” Peter said, and he felt a twinge of that old hurt, “but she wasn’t in love with me.”
“Just like Jacob,” Nat said sadly.
“Like who?”
“Twilight. The werewolf. Does Cassie love someone else, like how Bella loves Edward? That’s the vampire.”
“Yeah, she does,” Peter said. The mood was growing somber, and he didn’t want it to. He was fine. It had all worked out the way it was supposed to. “But he’s not a vampire. I hear he’s pretty nice.”
“So do you still love her?”
“I do, but in a different way. I want her to be happy. It’s complicated.”
Natalie’s eyes brimmed with tears. Peter patted her shoulder. “Listen, goofball, it’s not sad. When I make it there, you know who I want to be with?” Natalie shook her head. “Ana.”
“But do you love her?”
“I think so.” He studied the wall and wished Rich and Chuck were around to put an end to this conversation.
“But do you still love Cassie, too?”
Peter sighed. She wouldn’t stop harping on this, and he didn’t know how to explain it to this girl who thought everything was a love triangle in a young adult novel. He didn’t expect or even want to be with Cassie, but he still loved her in that way that love can turn into deep affection. “Yeah. Sort of.”
Nat bounced on the couch cushions, eyes suddenly dry. “Bella loves Jacob, too, but it’s different. Maybe like how you mean. You really need to read Twilight.”
Peter couldn’t think of any situation where Twilight would be required reading. “I think I’m doing all right without Bella’s help. But thanks.”
He picked up his book to signal that the conversation about his love life was over. Natalie ripped the mystery out of his hands and tossed it across the room. Then she put Twilight on his lap and moved his cane out of reach. “Please? Just read the first few chapters and I promise I’ll give you your other book back if you want. I have no one to talk to about this stuff! Please, please read it!”
“You are a pain in the butt,” Peter said. It was supposed to be a stern voice, but it was obvious from her wide smile that she wasn’t buying it. He would read the damn book, if only because that hopeful face she made reminded him of Bits. “Fine, I’ll read it.”
She squealed and did a victory dance. He was being played like a violin.
4
Chuck and Rich still weren’t back by the time he was almost through with New Moon and the sun was going down on day two. Natalie stood by the window, her hand resting on Jack’s head.
“I’m sure they’re okay,” Peter said, although he wasn’t. “They know I’m here and you’re safe. So they might have stayed an extra night if they needed to.”
Nat nodded and continued her vigil. When the sun had left the sky, she said she was going to bed. Peter read a chapter of Eclipse, then blew out the lamp and sat in the dark, listening for the sound of oars in the water that never came.
Natalie woke him the next morning with coffee. “I think you’re right. I gave them a whole list of stuff to get, so they’re probably doing that.” Her mouth was tight, though, and the coffee mug shook.
“Hey, don’t cry, sweetie.” Peter sat up and patted the couch beside him. “I have a feeling they’re fine. I really do.”
She dropped beside him and folded under his arm like a baby bird. She may have been sarcastic, sixteen and yearning for paranormal romance, but right now, sobbing into his shoulder, she was a scared little girl. Bits had lots of people to protect her, and he was glad he was there to give Chuck the same peace of mind. They sat like that until Peter’s coffee was cold and Nat had cried herself out.
When he finally rose, his ankle felt a bit better than the day before. He couldn’t run, or even walk fast, but it was healing. Another week or two and he’d be on his way. Maybe with Natalie in tow, but he hoped not. She needed her dad.
Afternoon brought a rainstorm, one that the men would probably wait out instead of rowing across the lake in. Peter and Nat were deep into a game of Scrabble when footsteps sounded on the deck and Chuck came in dripping.
“Daddy!” Nat yelled and threw herself into her father’s arms. As he imagined Bits doing the same, Peter bit his cheek.
“Sorry about that,” Chuck said to Peter. “God, I wish we could’ve called. We got stuck in a store, had to wait them out. But everything’s fine.” He took Nat’s face in his hands and looked down at her, eyes shining. “Everything’s fine. Okay?”
Her head moved up and down, and when he asked for help moving the stuff to the cabin, she threw on a coat and ran down to the water.
“Be careful out there,” Chuck said before he followed. “We were surrounded by hundreds of ‘em. We’ll make a couple more trips while you’re here, if that’s all right, and then we’re sticking close until the winter. Maybe they’ll freeze.”
“I hope so. Do what you have to do. I’m not going anywhere yet.” And Peter certainly wasn’t leaving Nat alone until he knew they were there to stay.
Peter sat in a chair and rolled the paint roller across the wall. He had the bottom half, Natalie the top. The cabin was much brighter now. Rich had chosen a premixed light blue, and it was turning out to be the perfect shade. He’d also gotten some white curtains and curtain rods, which he’d hung up. Once Peter finished the second coat on his half of the walls, he moved his chair to the sewing machine they’d set up on the table.
“So, how does that work with no electricity?” Natalie asked.
“You know my long leather gloves?” She nodded. “Well, Cassie made those for everyone using a sewing machine. You just turn the knob on the side and it sews for you. That’s all the electricity does.”
“Cool.”
Peter picked up the blue and brown modern floral fabric Rich had picked out. It looked like something from a magazine and matched the paint and the couch and chairs suspiciously well. “So, tell me about your uncle. He hardly ever speaks, dresses like a redneck, but he listens to classical music and managed to pick out the perfect fabric.”
He wasn’t worried that Rich would hear, since they’d left this morning on another run. Tomorrow would be Peter’s sixteenth day there, and he was babying his ankle so he would be abl
e to leave sooner rather than later. Rich said he was probably looking at another week there, as long as he didn’t overtax it.
“Uncle Rich was always like that. My grandma listened to classical music and was always redecorating. I guess he ended up liking it. My mom probably would’ve liked it if my dad was a little more like him.”
Peter thought about asking where her mom was, but the way her eyes grew unfocused and she bit her lip decided him against it.
“He wasn’t always quiet, though,” Nat continued. “He went back to his house to get my cousins and aunt and came back quiet. That’s what my dad says: He came back quiet. He won’t tell us anything, except that it was too late.”
“Oh.”
Peter imagined the mess Rich might have found and tried to put it out of his mind. That could certainly make a person quiet. He measured and cut the fabric to cover the extra bed pillows they’d cut into squares and read the instructions for the machine. He’d never sewn before, but it seemed easy enough.
Nat wiped a splotch of paint off her cheek. “You think Uncle Rich is weird, but you’re like him, you know. You killed all those zombies like a superhero, but here you are, decorating the house with me. And I know your clothes were super expensive before.”
“You know, you’re right,” Peter said with a laugh. He hadn’t realized that he might be considered a walking contradiction these days.
An hour later he sighed and laid the first uneven pillowcase on the floor. He was going to have to thank Cassie for the gloves again. How she’d fit together the strips of leather with such perfect seams, figured out the elastic and connected them to the gloves they’d found was amazing. He could barely sew a square, he’d just learned. The bobbin was still a complex mystery, although he’d gotten it to work. Natalie sat next to him, and together they made the second pillowcase a little more square than the first. The third was decent, and the fourth was almost perfect. They placed them on the couch and chairs and admired their handiwork.
“It never would’ve looked this nice without your help,” Natalie said. “We just have to spray paint the tables and we’re done.”
“Tomorrow. Let’s get some sleep.”
Natalie stood on her tiptoes and hugged him goodnight, like he was family. He stole her nose and pretended to put it in his back pocket. She humored him with a smile, the same way Bits did when he stole her nose. Even at half of Nat’s age, Bits was too old for Got Your Nose.
Nat raised her eyebrows. “Am I supposed to ask for it back or something?”
“Nope.” Peter tapped his pocket. “I have quite the collection. I’m not giving it up.”
“Wow, and here I thought you were cool. You’re just as dorky as my dad.”
Peter smiled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Goodnight, weirdo.” Nat giggled and headed for her room but turned at the door. “My dad told me if they don’t come back that I would go with you to Kingdom Come. He wanted me to know, just in case.”
“That’s right,” Peter said. “But, don’t worry, they’ll be back.”
“I know. I just didn’t want you to worry about telling me.” She put her hands on her hips. “Now, would you finish Breaking Dawn, already? I’m dying over here! We need to discuss!”
Nat skipped into her room and shut the door behind her. She’d gone from something as terrible as admitting her dad may never come back to demanding a Twilight symposium. Teenage girls were so strange, and he was extremely glad he was no longer a teenage boy. How any of them could compete with a sparkly vampire was beyond him. One day Bits would be a teenage girl, he realized, and picked up the book with a grimace. He should know what he was getting into.
Peter had circled the island over and over for days, until his ankle wasn’t sore. He’d run around in the brush as much as was possible. It was time, and when he announced his intention to leave the next day everyone looked disappointed. He would have stayed if he’d had nowhere to go, since he’d grown fond of them these past weeks. But September was almost half over, and he wanted to reach Kingdom Come before the snow started.
“I knew it was coming,” Chuck said, out on the deck after supper. “And thanks for staying longer than you needed to, so Nat wouldn’t be alone. We’ll miss you, Pete.”
“You could all come. I know you’ve put a lot of work into this place, but apparently this Safe Zone really is safe.”
Chuck sighed. “Next year, maybe, if we still need Safe Zones. We can’t go just yet.”
“Can I ask why?”
“Natalie’s mom. I’m waiting for her.” Chuck’s face softened, and he smiled when Peter failed at hiding the thought that she wasn’t coming from showing on his face. “I know, it sounds crazy. But I want to give her more time.”
“Where was she?”
“I’m not sure. We were separated, and it was Nat’s weekend with me. By the time I got to her house there was no sign of her. She’s a smart lady. She could still be okay. Not like Rich’s…”
Peter nodded. “Nat told me.”
“She doesn’t know the details. From what Rich said, it looked like his wife attacked his kids. My nephew was dead, but my niece and sister-in-law were still there. He had to—”
Peter filled in the silence. “Shit.”
“Yeah. Anyway, I’ve left notes everywhere my wife might go, telling her we’re here. This is where we used to make out in high school.” Chuck laughed. “So I could leave notes without being specific.”
“I hope she comes.”
Chuck kicked a rock off the steps. “Me too. I know she will, if she can. Maybe not for me, but for Natalie she’d do anything.”
“Well, you know where I’ll be if you change your mind.”
“I bet you can’t wait,” Chuck said. The straight line of his mouth curved a tiny bit. “Your little girl is there, and I’ve heard a bit about the others from Nat.”
“I can only imagine what she told you.”
Chuck clapped his back and howled. “She said she doesn’t know how any girl wouldn’t love you back. I think you may have beat out Edward.”
Peter laughed but said quietly, “Well, I was a jerk. That’s why any girl wouldn’t have loved me back.”
“Yeah,” Chuck said with a sigh. “I could’ve done a lot of things differently. I still love my wife, and I’m hoping I get a chance to make it right. You’ve got that chance, to make things different. Take it.”
Peter looked at Chuck’s broad, kind face. He was the kind of person Peter might have disregarded as simple a few months ago, if he’d even deigned to notice him. He hadn’t been overtly rude, but he’d treated people like they were invisible much of the time.
Maybe because he’d felt invisible. That’s what he’d said to Cassie one night. She’d told him it wasn’t true, but he’d pretended to fall asleep so as not to cry. The next morning Cassie tried to bring it up again, and he’d seen the impatience and hurt in her eyes when he shot her down. He’d known then that it was his last chance, and he hadn’t taken it.
That’s what he’d done the whole time they dated. Whenever he felt her pull away, he’d open up just enough for her to see the guy from the night they met. Then he’d get scared and distance himself again. It must have driven her crazy.
Well, he wasn’t scared anymore. There was a hell of a lot of other stuff to be scared of these days. Machetes and guns were useful, but the only thing that could really allay the fear was people. And for the first time in eighteen years, he had people. He had a daughter, a best friend, a possible girlfriend and the rest of his new family. He was lucky to have gotten one more chance to make things different and not fucked it up for the thousandth time.
Peter clapped Chuck’s shoulder in return. “I already have.”
The next morning, Rich, Chuck and Nat stood beside the truck and watched Peter throw his bag into the passenger seat well. “You sure you don’t want the Mercedes?” Chuck asked. “You can have it.”
“I’m sure,” Peter answe
red. He grinned and kicked a tire. “Maybe I’m more of a pickup guy now.”
Natalie threw herself at him. “I’ll miss you!”
“Don’t wait around for any sparkly vampires,” he whispered in her ear.
“I’d be on Team Peter, if you weren’t so ancient,” Nat said and pulled away, eyes sparkling.
“Thanks,” he said. “I think.”
He wished they were coming. On their way up to Cassie’s cabin, they’d left the Washingtons at the campground with promises to meet up, but they never showed. The chances of seeing Chuck, Rich and Nat again were slim to none. He understood Chuck’s reasoning, his desperate hope, but people needed to band together. It might be the only way to win back the world from the Lexers.
He held out his hand. “Thanks for all the nursing, Rich.”
“Thanks for helping around the cabin,” Rich said with one of his rare smiles. “It looks real nice. My brother would’ve dragged me over the coals if I’d suggested any of it.”
Chuck punched Rich’s shoulder and gave Peter a back-thumping hug. “You be safe out there.”
Peter nodded and got into the pickup. He spread the map, marked with roads Rich knew to be clear, out on the seat beside him. It would get him a third of the way there. After that, he was on his own. He put the truck in drive.
“So long, lollipop!” Nat called.
She’d remembered. He laughed and waved one last time. “So long, lollipops.”
And then he started down the road.
5
At first the roads took him past widely-spaced houses and fields choked with weeds. It all looked so desolate. Even the houses that didn’t have signs of struggle—broken windows or bodies out front—looked lonely. He felt like the last human on Earth. He wasn’t, of course, which was the only thing that kept him sane. He tried to imagine someone driving blindly along these roads, hoping to find something besides the small groups of Lexers he’d passed, and saw how it would be possible to give up. The old Peter probably would have, but not him.
Until the End of the World Box Set Page 42