by Tara Sivec
Page 4
Aside from Garrett, she never had anyone in her life that she connected with so quickly or that she trusted so easily. Being Milo’s friend was never the problem because it was always a two-way street between them. Milo was there for her just as much as she was for him. The problem was always her lingering thoughts about someone else, someone she had no business pining for or dreaming about.
Sometimes it made Parker feel guilty that she had to grow to love Milo as something more than a friend, and the fireworks never exploded when they first started sleeping together. But that stuff was only for fairytales and movies anyway. What she had with Milo was based on friendship and was real, even if they did have to work at it.
Parker ignored the nagging feelings of jealousy and longing and buried everything she felt for the other man in her life way down deep and vowed to be the best girlfriend in the world to Milo. She would do anything to avoid hurting him, and that included putting her wants and needs on the back burner. No woman needed to feel butterflies in her stomach every time a man walked into a room or daydream about soft lips or strong hands on her bare skin, but it didn't mean she didn't want those things. A relationship certainly didn’t need excitement or intensity to work, although those were the things she often longed for, and that Garrett always made her feel without even trying. Parker had a nice, easy relationship with Milo that held no complications or expectations. It was exactly what she needed in her life.
Over the years Parker became Garrett's closest friend, next to Milo, and he convinced himself that any feelings he may have had for her at one time were just the product of a silly crush. Given the amount of time he spent with her, it was only natural that every time he was with another woman, he imagined Parker's face when he pushed into them and heard Parker's soft moans and shouts of pleasure when they came.
Garrett watched his two best friends fall in love, grow together, and get engaged. Jealousy had nothing to do with the fact that whenever he had a dry spell and took matters into his own hands, he pictured Parker's mouth sucking him off when he palmed his dick and thought about how tight and hot she would feel wrapped around him when he came in his hand.
He never failed to feel like a pervert for having those thoughts about one of his best friends afterward. It was a vicious cycle that had been going on for eight years with no end in sight.
Unfortunately, nothing explained the anger he felt when he watched Milo kiss her or the sharp stab of pain in his chest when Milo opened the small, velvet box that day in the bar and showed him the diamond ring.
But Garrett had become an expert at compartmentalizing his feelings over the years. If he didn't admit it out loud, it wasn't true. He wasn't in love with one of his best friends because he would never say that out loud.
So he went on with his life and slept with random women to chase away his feelings and everyone had a good laugh about what a player he was.
He pretended that he imagined the looks of jealousy in Parker's eyes when he brought yet another new girl into their circle, and he most certainly knew he imagined the way she sometimes stared at his lips when he talked or sighed his name when she slept on the couch in his room while she and Milo were fighting.
Garrett was fully prepared to be Milo's best man and to give Parker away at their wedding since she hadn't spoke to her dad in twelve years. He lied through his teeth when he told them he would be honored to have such an important task.
He resigned himself to the fact that this was his life, now and forever. . . until his best friend was killed in action.
The shock slowly wore off and Garrett and Parker started to learn how to live their lives without Milo. Garrett hated the fact that every time he looked at her, he wondered “What if?” Milo didn’t deserve that kind of betrayal from him. It was too late to go back in time and make her his.
But she was never his to begin with, was she? You couldn't take back something that was never yours.
When Garrett found out things about Milo and the Dominican mission weren’t adding up, and that there were rumors his death wasn't an accident, he knew he had no other choice. As much as he didn't want to leave Parker so soon after Milo's death, he had to do this. For both of them. They needed closure.
His best friend had been gone for a month and Garrett still struggled every day to believe it was true. The past four weeks he’d spent every waking moment waiting for his phone to ring and to hear Milo’s boisterous laugh on the other end telling him it was all one big misunderstanding. But that call never came, and Garrett realized he couldn’t sit around waiting for it to happen. He reported back to work a few days earlier than planned because Parker threatened to beat the crap out of him if he didn’t. Under normal circumstances he would have laughed at her for thinking she could even attempt something like that, but her face was entirely too serious when she said it, and Garrett was a little worried she might actually attempt it and hurt herself.
Since Garrett never took a day off, he had accrued enough time to be able to take at least six weeks off. After two weeks he was climbing the walls. But he refused to leave Parker’s side, and even with her continued reassurance that she would be fine, he stuck by her like glue for another two weeks before she finally put her foot down.
“Garrett, you need to go back to work,” Parker told him one night over dinner.
It had been twenty-two days, two hours, and forty-seven minutes since the knock on her door informed Parker that Milo was never coming home. It had been twenty-one days since Garrett had slept in his own house, preferring to sleep on Parker’s couch instead. And it had been fourteen days since Parker hadn’t been irritated with him at one point or another for hovering over her like she was on the verge of suicide or a nervous breakdown.
At first his concern was sweet, and she was grateful to him for helping her pick up the pieces and figure out how to live without Milo, but now he was just getting on her nerves. He refused to take his own advice of moving on and living again. She could see it in his eyes. He’d lost someone too, but he acted like she was the only one hurting. She was tired of him keeping everything bottled up inside. She knew he was avoiding the grief and the sadness just to make sure she was okay. She would never be okay again. She’d lost her best friend and a huge piece of her heart when Milo died. She was slowly coming to terms with that and trying to live one day at a time, just like everyone told her to do. It was time for Garrett to do that as well. He couldn’t stay home from work and sleep on her couch forever. She needed to figure out how to do this on her own, and she couldn’t do that with Garrett keeping track of her every breath.
“Seriously, it’s time for you to go back,” Parker repeated as Garrett sat across the table from her not saying anything.
He gently set his fork down next to his plate and looked at her face, studying it to see if she was serious.
“I still have another two weeks before I need to go back, don’t worry. ”
Parker sighed in exasperation.
“I’m not worried about your time off. I’m worried about you. You’re going insane sitting around here day in and day out. ”
Garrett shook his head and tried to laugh it off, but Parker knew him too well.
“You need to move on too, Garrett,” she told him softly. “I’m not the only one who lost someone. I know your work is therapy to you. It clears your head and you love doing it. I’m not going to let you put your life on hold any more for me. I’m going to be okay. It’s time for you to go. ”
As much as it pained Garrett to leave Parker, he knew she was right. Neither one of them could move on if they were sitting around her house lost in memories.
Two days later, Garrett went back to work.
An hour into his day and he was still busy going through the emails he missed while he’d been out when a Navy messenger came up to his desk and set down a bin full of mail.
Garrett looked up from what he’d been doing
with a confused look on his face.
“That can’t all be mine. I’ve only been out for a few weeks. ”
Garrett stood up and pulled the bin toward him and glanced inside.
“Actually, sir, some of it is yours and the rest is Lieutenant JG Roberts’. The receptionist thought you’d know what to do with his things. ”
Garrett thanked the man and started leafing through the envelopes. Most of it was interoffice Navy mail: forms, letters, and other paperwork that went back and forth between Navy offices on a daily basis. Garrett piled those things off to the side so he could look at them later and see who they should be sent to or which ones he could file himself.
He flipped quickly through the mail, nothing urgent catching his eye until a white envelope stuck out like a sore thumb in the middle of all the manila-colored interoffice ones. Garrett pulled that out of the stack and was confused when he saw it was a cell phone bill for Milo from T-Mobile. Garrett knew for a fact that Milo had Verizon, just like he and Parker did because they all shared the same Family Share plan.
After a quick phone call to Parker to confirm that Milo did indeed still have the same phone and plan before he left, Garrett tore into the envelope. He didn’t recognize the cell phone number listed at the top of the bill and briefly wondered if maybe the Navy had given Milo a phone for work-related purposes. That didn’t make any sense, though, since Garrett, Milo’s superior, would have had first-hand knowledge of this information and would have been required to sign off on the expense.
Garrett scanned through the bill, noting that every phone call Milo made or received was to the same phone number with an 809 area code. After a quick Google search, Garrett found out that area code belonged to the Dominican Republic. According to this bill, Milo had been receiving or making at least twenty phone calls every single day the month before he left on his mission.
Garrett double-checked the date on the bill, wondering why it was just now being delivered since it was dated four months ago.
He picked up the phone at his desk and called customer service. After fifteen minutes on hold, and being passed around to countless people, he finally found someone who could help him.
“I’m just trying to figure out if this account was set up as a business account,” Garrett explained to the operator.
He heard the sound of typing keys through the line and waited.
“It looks like that account was opened by a third party and it is classified as personal. ”
Garrett had no idea why Milo would ever need a second personal phone.
“Can you tell me who this third party was?” Garrett asked.
“I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t give you any more information than that due to privacy laws. ”
Garrett sighed in exasperation.
“Milo Roberts is deceased. Isn’t there some sort of statute of limitation on the whole privacy thing once someone is dead?” Garrett asked.
“Unfortunately, no. Unless you can send us proof that you have the power of attorney for Mr. Roberts, I can’t give you any more information. ”
“Can you at least tell me why this bill is just coming now, when it was from four months ago?”
A few more seconds of typing and the operator spoke again.
“It looks like those bills are normally sent elsewhere, but there was a glitch in the system, and Mr. Roberts received that month’s bill by mistake. ”
Garrett had thanked the man for his help and hung up the phone more confused than ever.
He still couldn't figure out why Milo would have needed a separate phone. And more importantly, who the hell had bought and paid for it if it wasn’t the U. S. Government?
Garrett would go to the Dominican and do what he did best. He would dig and he would question and he would use every skill he had ever learned in the Navy to get answers.
When Milo and Garrett first began the Naval Academy, Garrett had no plans to be career military. He would put in his time, keep an eye on Milo, and then get out. After graduation and their first few months in California, Garrett often wondered why he was doing this. In the words of his late friend, “Do you have any idea how much pussy you’ll get as a Navy SEAL? You have to do it so I can live vicariously through you. ”
The thirty months of Seal training were the most grueling, mind-fuck of a situation he had ever been in. But he made it and was surprised to realize he liked it. He had been on a handful of extractions with his SEAL team, and though he got a rush and a sense of accomplishment with each one, he knew this wasn't what he wanted to do forever. He preferred sitting behind a computer, analyzing reports, finding backdoor ways into secure websites and developing military code for top secret government programs.
Garrett earned his master’s degree six months before his completion of Seal training, and due to his nature of study, he was assigned as a Technical Surveillance Analyst. He could still be called out on extraction missions, but more often than not, his expertise was better served on the home front. While Garrett sat behind a desk all day, Milo went all over the world on Special Operations.
Garrett was a nerd and he wasn't ashamed to admit it. He would use his geekiness to figure out what really happened on Milo's mission, and if all hell broke loose, at least he had his SEAL training to keep him alive.
Garrett had lived through boot camp, Hell Week, SEAL training, and suffered through extreme conditions in several third world countries during special reconnaissance missions. He had prided himself on being strong, not letting his emotions show, and not breaking when his will was tested to the limit. He had held firm when he got the call that his best friend had been killed in action and had been the rock that Parker needed these past six months.
But now, standing there watching his best friend's eyes fill with tears, would be the one thing that broke him.