And then I saw the rest of her. I moaned at the sight, and quickly called to Ben.
“Ben!” I called. “Over here; I found her.”
Tulia was tucked behind a fallen chair, passed out on her stomach. Seeing her unconscious on the floor made me feel sick, but I forced my sudden queasiness down as Ben arrived. Together, we pushed the chair out of our way and Ben began checking for signs of life.
As we carefully turned her over, my mouth dropped open. There were several shards sticking out of her hands and face, gleaming in the firelight. Little trickles of blood and sweat ran together from the numerous tiny cuts in her skin.
“Tulia,” I wept.
“Keep your focus,” Ben snapped, and I tried to stifle myself. I knew he was feeling poorly too, or he would not have been so curt with me.
I lowered my gaze in shame, realizing this was not a situation where a member of the Order would get emotionally sloppy. As I glanced down, I saw a trail of glass shards spanning out on the floor all around, with several more small pieces littering the nearby area in a strange circular pattern.
Had Tulia been drinking? I gently touched two fingers to her forehead, where one particularly large shard was laced into her wrinkles. It was searing to the touch, and I almost gasped at the sudden burn on my fingertips.
“Eleanora! Benedict!”
From outside, Lady Penelope was calling for us. She might as well have been calling from the opposite side of the world, rather than from the other side of the door.
I wanted to yell back, but I inhaled too quickly and felt the smoke gather inside of my mouth. I ended up coughing before Ben knelt beside me.
“Take her right arm.”
Carefully, I knelt at Tulia’s side and hauled her up, suddenly grateful for all the years Cecilia had forced me to work with my hands so much. Despite the dizzying heat and the sharp sweat drops running down my face, I was able to balance her weight against my own and Ben’s.
“I have her.” I nodded as another loud crackle of fire whipped around us. I coughed and began to feel choked by the sweltering atmosphere.
Together, Ben and I managed to make it to the doorway. Amir was quick to relieve me of duty, and Lady POW breathed a sigh of relief. I felt her exhale rush past my cheeks, still warm against the chilly winter air that soon settled on me once more.
“What happened?” I asked, my voice croaking and cracking as I breathed in all the fresh air I could. “Where is the attacker?”
“He slipped away while Lady Penelope and I were calling for you,” Amir told me. He looked away. “Lady Penelope managed to injure his arm and I took his weapon. That will be enough of a victory for us tonight.”
“I’m surprised,” I said. “I thought for sure you would win. Aren’t the good guys always supposed to win?”
“This is not a play or a novel. You will find, in real life, there are more times than we would like that failure finds us.”
Hearing his words, I almost wondered if Ben had been keeping him company too much lately. Ben was more likely to be the pessimist.
“Besides,” Amir added with a small smile, “Lady Penelope had one of the footmen take off and follow him. With any luck, we will be able to find his local haunt and his boss while we are at it.”
That was more like Lady Penelope, I thought with a grin. “Good. I’m glad to hear.”
“We already have some clues. Here, Eleanora,” Lady Penelope said, as she stuffed a handkerchief into my hand. “Use this to help you breathe some.”
All I could do was nod, before coughing some more. I looked down at myself, smelling of decay. Well, now I am really glad I changed outfits.
“What kind of clues did you find?” Amir asked.
“A handkerchief of his own,” Lady Penelope said, pulling out a soot-covered scrap of fabric. “It’s been embroidered with a coat of arms. I do not recognize it, but I will see what Harshad says.”
I studied it, and I was glad to know Harshad would be analyzing it later. I did not recognize the loopy ‘S’ that marked it, any more than I could identify the wavy lines or the prancing horse embroidered into the fine cloth.
“What about Tulia?” I asked.
“She needs medical attention,” Ben called. “Amir!”
Amir and I hurried over, and I realized Ben had blood on his hands.
“Don’t try to move her.” Amir came running up to us. He tore at his shirt, hurriedly making bandages for Tulia. “Let me stop the bleeding first.”
“She is going to get better, right?” I asked. Behind me, the fire burned brighter as the house began to collapse.
“We will need to get some better bandages,” Amir said, “and I will have to sew her up.”
“I will make room in the coach,” Lady Penelope offered. “Eleanora, come along and assist me.”
I nodded dumbly, otherwise frozen by fear. Glancing back at the scene, I watched Ben and Amir grapple with blood and glass, watched as the house behind me burned to the ground, and watched as my world became intensely more intimate with fear and all its oppressive power.
The next several minutes—perhaps hours—seemed to pass by in a feverish dream. As we transported Tulia to the manor and settled her into her own room, I struggled with all the powers around me and inside me. I felt helpless to curb the anxiety and its accompanying trials that crippled me. My mind raced quickly, running from Tulia’s kindness to the world’s ugliness, jumping from the realization I could do so little to stop the world’s bleeding, before finally crashing at the aching hatred that the world should be so full of evil in the first place.
Why, God? Why? Why give me a problem I can’t solve, a burden I can’t bear?
I did not know how life could go on without Tulia.
Once she was settled into her bed, with the fireplace roaring alive and the dawn breaking through the windows, I took hold of her hand and grasped it tightly. Amir carefully removed many of the glass shards in her face and hands, while Ben reapplied new bandages, and Lady Penelope and Harshad worked on finding out who was behind everything.
All of this happened while I sat there, holding her hand, watching her sleep. I felt useless, needless. I did not know if there was anything else I could do, or if I would be able to do anything anyway.
*20*
◊
I was dreaming.
In my dreams I was flying, and then I was falling, and then I was flailing.
And then I slammed into the woken world.
“Huh?” I woke up, nearly shooting out of my chair. At once, I noticed the uncomfortable ache in my back and my neck; the smell of soot shot across my senses and pain pierced through my forehead. I was unable to process how much time had passed since I had fallen asleep.
Blinking, I looked around and steadied myself. I had fallen asleep in a chair next to Tulia’s bed after we had brought her back to the house.
At the small tapping on my knee, I rubbed my eyes clear of the morning blur to see Tulia looking up at me.
The speckles of dots across her face had scarred over, but I saw no signs of permanent trauma in her eyes.
“Tulia!” I cheered, reaching over to carefully embrace her. “You’re awake.”
She smiled weakly, rolling her eyes, as if to say with all her regular spunk, “I’m alive.”
“I’m so glad. We were worried for you.”
The eyes crinkled again, this time with curiosity.
“We, including Ben and ... Lady Penelope, too,” I said, answering her unspoken question. “My grandmother.”
Her eyebrows crinkled again, and then she exhaled, defeated.
“I won’t let her hurt you,” I promised.
Her fingers, stiff with bandages mixed with dried blood and healing herbs, flicked at me. She was not afraid of Lady POW.
I hesitated for a long moment. Part of me knew I should go and call for Amir and let the others knew Tulia was awake. We needed to know what happened to her, and who was behind it.
But ...
�
�Why didn’t you tell me about her?” I asked.
Tulia reached over and took my hand, gently squeezing it. Our eyes met, and for the first time in a long time, I had to guess at what she was trying to tell me.
“Did my mother want you to keep us from her?” I asked.
She nodded.
“Why?” I asked. “Was it because of Lady POW—er, Lady Penelope? Or because of the Order?”
Her expression gave me the answer long before she did. Tulia knew about the Order; I did not have to explain it to her. As I mentioned it, she closed her eyes, as though to stop any tears she might shed.
She nodded again. Her hand tightened in mine, as she slowly signaled her answer to me.
“The Order has many enemies.”
“Enemies? You mean like the person who attacked you last night?” I bit my lip. “And the people who killed Dr. Artha?”
For a quick second, I saw the surprise on her face, and then I saw it transform into tired resignation. Tulia nodded again.
I sat back in the chair, slumping over with a sigh. It was easy to see what had channeled Máma’s decision to keep her children a secret from her mother, especially if Lady POW was as relentless a leader back then as she was now.
Tulia slowly moved her hand, placing her palm over her heart. She patted it twice, before nodding to me.
“I am sorry.”
“I know.” I closed my eyes and sighed. I would forgive her, of course, just as I had forgiven my mother. It was hard to say if Lady Penelope would forgive her, and I was petty enough to hope she would not. Lady Penelope’s anger seemed to be more of a punishment than my rejection.
I jolted upright in my chair as the door opened behind us.
“Well, you’re awake.” Lady Penelope’s voice was as sharp as ever, leaving me to wonder if she was talking to Tulia or me.
Tulia’s speckled face twisted into a grimace.
“I was hoping that we would not meet again, either. Family reunions have never been pleasant for us.”
“Family?” I asked.
“Just how much have you kept from them, Tulia? Were you just acting under Dezda’s orders? Or maybe Jakub’s?”
“Who’s Jakub?” I asked.
“Your grandfather,” Lady Penelope replied with a disdainful snort. “Tulia is his half-sister.”
Tulia nodded as I looked at her. She gave me a small, rueful smile. Her fingers moved over mine. “A bastard child.”
I said nothing. And nothing happened. I did not ask any questions, nor did I start spewing accusations or lashing out in anger. I was getting tired of being surprised, but I continued to sit there, still and silent, somehow waiting for more surprises to come along.
“Which is why I’m not terribly surprised that she has betrayed us, come to think of it,” Lady Penelope continued.
Tulia rolled her eyes, and I just stared blankly between the two of them. I was numb to the tension around us, even though I could sense it.
“Since she has neglected to tell you our wonderful family history, it would be better for you to wait with the others in the library. Your curiosity, Eleanora, as endearing as it can be when it is not inconvenient, would only keep us from getting down to business.”
“But if she is family,” I objected, “then I should be here for her.”
“Operating like a business is better, when your family is full of secrets and lies.”
“I’m part of the business, too, now that I am a member of the Order.” I stood up, facing her, prepared to fight her objections.
“And as such, you should listen to my commands.” She crossed her arms in front of her and shook her head. “Your anger right now is exactly the reason you should leave. You struggle to keep your focus enough.”
Tulia brushed her fingers against my skirt. I turned and watched her nod, telling me she would be fine, and it was true that I should go.
“I want Amir in here first,” I said slowly. “He needs to check her injuries.”
“Go and send for him, then. I can trust him to remain silent.”
Tulia made a small movement, telling me she was still tired and wanted to rest longer. I began to translate for Lady POW, but she shook her head.
“There’s no need. I know what she is saying. It has been many years, but we have not forgotten how to communicate.”
“Fine. I won’t do bother trying to help you again,” I muttered, irritated at her lack of graciousness.
As if to prove it, Tulia signed a vicious insult, and Lady Penelope scowled. For a long moment, they stared daggers at each other.
When they finished their silent battle, Lady POW turned back to me. “Go and get Amir. He might as well tend to her for a few hours, and then we can ask her our questions. I will stay here until he arrives.”
I frowned.
“There are a few questions I have for her.” Lady POW arched her brow at me. “And besides, we will need her for our investigation, Eleanora, so you need not worry that I will allow any further harm to come to her.”
“I didn’t think you would,” I said with a sigh, before moving around her and heading out the door. “But when she has rested enough, I am coming back with Ben. We both deserve to know the truth, especially after last night.”
Lady POW scowled, but she said nothing. I had to wonder if she was more frustrated I refused to do what she wanted or if she was more upset she could not bring herself to correct me.
I took comfort in the opportunity to escape. My body ached from sleeping poorly, my mind was fuzzy and full of too many possibilities to worry exclusively about one reality. My clothes smelled of pungent smoke, and my hair was falling from the last of its pins.
But most of all, I was weary.
It seemed everything that had changed since the night of Lady POW’s arrival ran up to me, catching me all at once. Since then, I had a whole new life; I struggled to imagine what life would have been like if Alex and Teresa Marie were still to be married, if I had never been freed from Cecilia’s servanthood, and if I had never learned the truth about my mother, my work, and my home. My life.
All I knew was things were different, and there was no going back. There was only going forward, and there was no guarantee that there would be any rest or renewal.
The magic of Prague’s far away city had dimmed, and in my disillusionment, I encountered a terrible plot to overthrow the kingdom, I watched as one of my dearest companions almost burned and bled to death, I saw that same companion turned into an unrecognizable family member, and I was constantly pulled in all sorts of directions.
Sighing, I shook my head. I was not just tired of being surprised. I was tired of being disappointed.
HOURS LATER, WE WERE still waiting for Tulia to wake up again. Despite the delay in the investigation, I was glad for the break. I was able to get a bath and wash my hair, change my clothes, and take a proper nap. I was also glad that Lady Penelope sent out our regrets for the evening, citing my twisted ankle from the previous night as the reason I would not be in attendance for Society’s delight.
She informed me of her decision when we were in the library together, still waiting to hear from Tulia.
“Thank you,” I replied, clutching the book in my lap. I was ignoring it as Lady POW worked at my father’s desk, but it helped to at least feel I had some protection from her direct study.
“That was good thinking on your part last night, you know.” She gave me a reluctant smile. “It gives us an excuse to stay away, and it will still make people talk. Perhaps their pity will be even more useful than your presence.”
“I’m glad it helped. At least I am good at something, even if it is lying.”
Lady Penelope’s hands tightened together. “I suppose I should apologize to you, Eleanora.”
The book dropped to the floor. “What?”
Lady Penelope smirked. “I know. Shocking isn’t it? And you have already had quite a few surprises lately.”
“That is an understatement,” I agreed. �
��But not one worth your apology.”
“I do not want to apologize for the truth,” Lady Penelope corrected. “You are doing well as a member of the Order, and I am proud of what you have done so far. If I do not express it, it is usually because I am not accustomed to surprises, either.”
“Is it a family trait?” I asked with a small smile.
“Probably,” she replied. “Just as curiosity is, no doubt. But my apology is more for the matter of our instruction. You are family first, and it has been a very, very long time since I have had to worry about family before work, if, in all fairness, I have ever done so.”
I watched her as she said it, and it was hard to fault her as anything less than genuinely repentant.
Ben had said before that everyone was devastated by Máma’s death, and it looked like the truth; but much like the truth, I did not realize it affected others as much as it did me.
“I’m just glad I am not a failure,” I said.
Lady Penelope cleared her throat again, clearly uncomfortable. “These are early days between us, Eleanora,” she said. “Our time will stretch out into eternity, and we must make it count. If there is any failure between the two of us, it is with me.”
Lady Penelope met my gaze, and I felt a small ripple of approval from her. “Thank you. I did not want you to be angry with me.”
“You should never fear my anger,” Lady Penelope said. “Not as long as we are on the same side.”
I nodded.
“From what Amir told me about your adventure earlier,” Lady Penelope continued, “I can understand the reasons for it. I am glad to hear that you have good friends in the city. I cannot imagine Cecilia has made it easy for you to meet with them since your father’s death.”
Was she talking about Ferdy? I frowned, wondering if Amir had embellished our relationship in order to protect me. Lady POW would not fault loyalty, especially if there was good cause for it. Amir did not know the exact nature of my interest in Ferdy. Was it possible he had misread my interest when I told him? Or maybe I had given too much of my affection away?
I shrugged. “Oh, well, I really just met—”
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