The Moonshawl

by Storm Constantine

  ‘Hmm, to know the danger, yet lack the will to escape it.’ I gazed at Medoc meaningfully. ‘There might be more to what you said than you think. Kinnard kept your letters. I know because I’ve seen them. If he didn’t care, or still resented you, surely he’d have destroyed them. So perhaps he was tied there, and a wedge was driven between you of more than personal feeling.’

  ‘He never replied.’

  ‘I gathered that. But perhaps he felt, deep inside, that what you’d done was for the best, and for all the hara who departed with you. Perhaps he made no contact so you were free to create your own new lives, far away from that twisted nest.’

  ‘I’d like to think that,’ Medoc said, unsure.

  ‘I believe you should think that, no matter what.’ I put aside my notebook. ‘Thank you, Medoc.’

  ‘Don’t thank me. Now I’m wondering whether I was a fool to tell you the story, because it’s only confirmed your belief you can fight this evil, this ysbryd drwg.’

  ‘Oh, it was confirmed before I came here,’ I said. I felt I couldn’t tell him about Arianne at that moment because enough dramatic information had filled the air for now. It might be she’d faded away without me there to anchor her; I had no way of knowing till I returned to the tower.

  ‘Do you really think you can win?’ Medoc asked.

  ‘Yes. I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s a certainty, but the odds are on my side. I have the confidence of one of the Whitemanes.’

  Medoc’s eyes widened. ‘You do?’

  ‘Yes, and Myv is a sturdy little soul. I hope that between us we have the means to banish this historical parasite, this bad ghost, once and for all.’

  ‘You have to wonder,’ Medoc said, ‘whether Wyva and Mossamber will thank you for it, if you succeed.’

  I smiled grimly. ‘If they don’t, I can live with that.’

  Medoc was silent for a moment, staring at me. ‘If you have to, if you need a place, you are always welcome here.’

  ‘Thank you. I hope, though, it’s not needed.’

  Medoc stood up. ‘I’m weary now, wrung out like a wet cloth. I’ll show you to a guest room, but stay up if you wish to. Hara will still be down in the hall, I expect.’

  ‘No, I’d prefer the quiet of a bedroom. I want to write up notes from our earlier conversation, then sleep too.’

  ‘Stay for breakfast, then. Don’t rush off tomorrow.’

  ‘I won’t. Thank you.’

  Medoc led me to a small but comfortable room that looked out over the farming land, the river, the distant trees and the even more distant mountains. Laughter came from the hall below. Before I began writing, I sat for some minutes on the window seat, gazing out over this placid, fecund land and prayed to Aruhani, dehar of aruna, life and death. ‘Extend your hand, Aruhani. Be kind to those who have suffered.’

  Chapter Twenty

  The following day, I got home around noon, by which time summer was having one of its moods and had pulled curtains of petulant clouds across the sun, but at least this was a natural phenomenon, unlike the previous recent storm. Rain began to fall as I let Hercules into his field. Before I entered Dŵr Alarch, I stood for a few moments looking up at it, thinking of its history, its character, and wondering what might happen next. Because there had to be a next, now.

  When I went into the kitchen, I found Rinawne sitting there with Arianne. If anything, she seemed more real than before, so much so it wasn’t even disorientating, which in itself was odd. She was my visitor, a person who’d returned to a home in which she’d once lived. I did wonder though, what she and Rinawne had talked about.

  ‘I take it Rinawne’s been looking after you,’ I said, as I took off my coat and hung it on the hook next to the door.

  ‘I wish you wouldn’t say that as if it were a bad thing,’ Rinawne retorted.

  Arianne and I exchanged a meaningful glance, and I had the feeling Rinawne had spent considerable time complaining about Wyva and the secrecy surrounding the past. She said to me, ‘If it’s possible, I would like to meet Myv.’ So he had been one of the subjects.

  I nodded. ‘Yes... I didn’t tell Medoc about you.’ I shifted my travelling bag next to the door. ‘The main reason being I don’t want to disappoint him if it turns out your visit here is... only temporary. But Rinawne can get Myv here in twenty minutes.’ I stared at her. ‘And Wyva?’

  ‘A bit at a time.’ She grimaced. ‘I can’t shake off the feeling he won’t believe I’m who I say I am. I don’t want to deal with that.’

  Thank you, Rinawne, I thought.

  ‘But Myv...’Arianne said softly, ‘a child born of... not a woman. Yet my great grandson. This little miracle I want to see.’

  ‘Technically he’s your grand high-harling,’ I said, ‘and yes, he is a little miracle.’

  ‘Rinawne explained a lot to me,’ Arianne said, sending a warm glance across the table to him.

  I noticed he glanced at me furtively before smiling back at her. He could sense my thoughts.

  ‘This new world is strange...’ Arianne continued, oblivious to the undercurrents in the atmosphere, ‘a return to some kind of idyllic past in some ways, yet in others utterly alien, as if people have come here from a different planet and taken the place of humanity.’

  I smiled at her. ‘Despite the upheaval, I like to think the world is happier now. There is room to breathe.’

  ‘Humanity destroyed itself,’ Arianne said. ‘Some of us could see it coming and to be perfectly honest, I’m not sorry it’s gone. Selfish, greedy, cruel, ignorant...’ She shook her head. ‘Wraeththu was both our punishment and a cure for us.’

  ‘Hara aren’t perfect,’ I said. ‘We can be all those things you just listed, as well as stupid. We’re humanity’s second chance, really, and we need to work hard not to ruin it.’

  Arianne smiled. ‘What I’ve seen so far gives me great hope.’

  I was warmed by her words, but all the same, she’d only met two hara. She had no idea what was out there, the bad things that still happened, the power struggles that continued to be fought. Still, for now, I was happy to let her keep that feeling she called hope but was in fact relief.

  There was a fresh pot of tea on the table, so I sat down and helped myself. ‘Well, such thoughts aside, we might as well get to the meat. I’ll tell you all I learned from Medoc.’

  ‘From your face I can tell you’ve learned a lot,’ Rinawne said, who had remained uncharacteristically quiet for some minutes.

  ‘Oh yes!’ I said, somewhat grimly, and turned to Arianne. ‘I apologise in advance for some of what you’re going to hear.’

  She shrugged. ‘I want the truth as much as you do. The pain I lived through was far worse than anything you can tell me now. Remember, I saw some of it.’

  As I was speaking, relating the facts impartially, I wondered when in fact I’d have to reveal what I knew to Wyva. He’d be angry, of course, that I’d investigated his family’s past without his permission, but would he be prepared to face up to what was happening now? A new generation of Wyvachi reaching maturity, the curse revived from whatever dank corner in which it had slept? He had to face it, and I didn’t agree with Medoc’s opinion that the Wyvachi should just run away. Whatever haunted the air around Gwyllion and Meadow Mynd was wrong, a remnant of a past best forgotten that should be erased. And if Medoc was right, and Vivi Wyvern was part of this lurking malevolence, there was even more reason to fight, to send this damaged fragment of a soul on her way.

  When Rinawne brought Myv over to the tower, later in the day, Arianne held out her arms to him and he went to her willingly. She enfolded him, smelling him, perhaps holding him too tightly. But he allowed this. Rinawne had clearly explained what he could to his son on the way through the forest, and Myv being the har he is had simply accepted it. ‘I saw you in the bathroom,’ he said to Arianne. ‘Did you see me?’

  ‘Not that I can remember,’ she answered, ‘but I’m seeing you now.’

  ‘You’re her
e to help us,’ Myv said firmly. ‘This means we must win.’

  I caught Rinawne’s eye and he gave me a pitiful look, clearly not sharing his son’s confidence.

  ‘Now we must begin to make plans,’ I said, indicating everyone should sit at the kitchen table. ‘I can only use techniques I’ve employed in similar situations, which – I have to be honest with you – were far less... entrenched.’

  ‘What techniques?’ Arianne asked.

  ‘Fighting will with will,’ I replied, ‘but making ours the strongest.’

  Arianne nodded. ‘I understand. This is what we called magic.’ She grinned. ‘Yes, I was known as something of a witch in my time. The power of the will... the connection between all things... Are we not on the same path?’

  I smiled back at her. ‘Yes, I’d say we are.’ I was glad I wouldn’t have to explain too much or – worse – have to explain to a sceptic what I wanted to do. ‘We know more or less what we’re up against. We can visualise the ysbryd drwg as a condensed ball of badness, whose skin we’ve got to pierce. First, we’ll need to lure and confine it somehow. This can be done with focused imagery – again, our combined will. When we accomplish this, and the skin is breached, it’s likely the badness will emerge. We’ll have to transmute it into a different kind of energy and then disperse it.’

  ‘Sounds simple,’ Rinawne said sarcastically.

  I ignored his tone. ‘The main difficulty is that when the drwg – the bad – does come out, it will most likely disorient us or incapacitate us in some way. Fear and the fact we believe in it might be the ysbryd’s only weapons, but they are strong, despite not being physical. We’ll have to support each other to keep our defences intact.’

  ‘We’ll have to give something also,’ Myv said. ‘A sacrifice.’

  ‘What kind?’ Arianne asked him sharply. ‘Not a life... don’t say that.’

  I let Myv continue without interrupting him, not quite sure myself what he meant.

  ‘No, not a life,’ he said, ‘but something meaningful.’

  ‘You’re wrong,’ Rinawne murmured.

  ‘How?’ Myv asked, somewhat sharply.

  Rinawne stared at his son. ‘The face of the banshee.’

  Arianne frowned at him. ‘What?’

  ‘That’s what we’ll have to face,’ he replied. ‘We have to make her turn round. And she will demand her price.’

  Rinawne asked for a private word with me shortly after this dire pronouncement. ‘Outside,’ he said.

  We went to stand on the tower’s terrace, surrounded by my rudimentary attempts at gardening. ‘There’s something we’ve not discussed,’ Rinawne said. There was an unfamiliar seriousness about him.

  ‘What is it?’

  ‘My son,’ he said. ‘Now, don’t say anything – just listen for once. Over the past few days, we’ve accepted the unbelievable. We talk about taking on nebulous, possibly deadly entities, as if it’s some little adventure. You’ve included Myv in this and because you have this glamorising effect on hara I’ve gone along with it. But just now, in there, it hit me. Should a harling be involved in this? He sees it as a game, I’m sure, and he’s loving the way you’ve drawn him in, treated him as an adult. But Ysobi... really...’ He pulled a sour face. ‘If Wyva knew of this, he’d put a stop to it – and your work here. You’d be lucky to leave Gwyllion with your skin intact. Stand back a little, will you? Just think about this?’

  I stared at him, seeing in his face that he’d braced himself for my retaliation, expecting to be beaten down with words. ‘You’re right,’ I said.

  He narrowed his eyes. ‘I’m right, and then suddenly there are all the reasons that, even though being right, I’m wrong?’

  ‘No, you’re absolutely right. We’re taking immense risks and if Wyva found out, the least he’d do is banish me from this place.’

  ‘But...?’

  ‘There isn’t one. I just don’t think we have a choice. Myv will be involved whether we keep him informed or not. He’s always been involved, Rin – seeing and sensing things around the house, speaking with Rey about it all. All we can do is stand by him and protect him to the best of our ability. Cutting him out of our discussions would simply be unfair and disrespectful. Also, I like to think including him will do more to protect him than keeping him in ignorance.’

  Rinawne grimaced. ‘That was a paragraph of “buts”.’

  ‘No, it wasn’t. I’d rather Myv was with us than alone at home with his hostling, who’s in denial. I understand your fears, Rin, and I’m not belittling them. You’ve a right to be afraid for Myv, but you’re strong and grounded, and an essential part of our team. You’re his father. Who else could be more adept at protecting him?’

  Rinawne smiled uncertainly. ‘You assume that when whatever it is we have to face turns up I won’t be running off screaming.’

  I smiled also. ‘Oh, come on. You’re fierce. You wouldn’t do that now, not if Myv was in any danger.’

  Rinawne appeared partly reassured by these words, but really I didn’t blame him for not being wholly convinced. ‘Do we even know what’s going to happen?’ he asked.

  ‘No, but we can take action and help guide events. We can’t wait passively to find out, hoping it’s something we can cope with. We have to make plans. We have to be firm. I’ll put all I have into protecting Myv and freeing Gwyllion from this blight. That’s all I can say.’

  Rinawne sighed deeply. ‘I remember the fear, Ys, from when I was a harling and that thing I saw began to turn round. The fear was irrational and consuming. I’m not sure making plans will help in any situation like that.’

  I squeezed his shoulder. ‘You were a harling. You’re not now. Neither am I, nor Arianne. Maybe you had that experience for the very reason you’d be facing this situation now. Maybe it was meant.’

  Rinawne expressed a scornful snort. ‘That would be too convenient. No, it was just an experience, as all the things you’ve gone through as a hienama are experiences, and perhaps what we’ve learned from those things will help us now. That’s the best we can hope for, I think.’

  ‘Then that will be good enough. We start work now, today, building our defences, unifying our group. I hope that’ll make you feel more confident.’

  Rinawne laid a hand upon my chest. ‘So do I. Don’t be get me wrong. I want to be brave, and I’m furious this blight, as you put it, is threatening my family. I agree with you entirely we have to try to put a stop to it, once and for all. I just don’t want to let the rest of you down.’

  ‘I know how you’ve felt since Cuttingtide,’ I said. ‘You wanted it all to go away, have a normal, uncomplicated life. Yet you’re here now, prepared to fight. That’s courage enough for me.’

  He smiled, stroked my face. ‘When the time comes, just hold my hand and don’t let go.’

  The four of us spent the rest of that day meditating together, trying out various visualised scenarios, combining our intention. Arianne could not mind touch as a har can, but because three of us could put concerted effort into including her in unspoken communication, she was able to pick up enough to work with us effectively. Also, as she’d already told us, she was familiar with work of this nature, although she’d never had to deal with anything like the ysbryd drwg. ‘Love spells, healing, divination... that’s as far as it went,’ she said. ‘But I can feel what you talk about, Ys. I’ve no doubt it’s out there. And I’m here now to help fight it.’

  She wasn’t scared, but why should she be? As far as Arianne was concerned, she’d already lived through the most terrifying things a mortal life can throw at you. I did manage to ask her privately during that afternoon how she felt about the fact part of what we faced might be a remnant of her mother-in-law.

  She set her face in a firm expression. ‘It’s not Vivi. If there is anything of her in it, it’s her grief, her fear and her anger. But it’s not her entire personality, if you understand what I mean.’

  I nodded. ‘Yes, but whatever part of her it is, it will
no doubt recognise you and seek your vulnerabilities.’

  Arianne laughed coldly. ‘Ysobi, I lived with Vivi Wyvern for many years. I learned how to cope with her then – and she could be a monster. I’m not going to let her bully me now.’

  My little team had enough enthusiasm and courage for a group of ten, yet I was worried for them. I had fears I hadn’t been prepared to admit to Rinawne because I didn’t want to feed his doubts. Ferreting out information and putting the story together was one thing, but now that the time had come to act, we seemed so small in comparison to what we might face. This was a power that could engorge the skies and command the elements, could strike a har dead. We were one hienama, a har who’d never trained but had once seen a banshee, a human woman who might or might not be a ghost, and a harling not yet at feybraiha. I did wonder during that afternoon whether I was mad, and Medoc was right, and I was about to throw these good hara – and woman – into something far bigger and deadlier than we imagined. Still, what other choice did we have? If I went to Wyva, or even Mossamber Whitemane, and revealed my plans to them, I was sure I’d be met with scorn or disbelief or anger, or all three. This negativity would disperse all that we were trying to build up. I couldn’t risk it. We had to remain focused, pure of intent and strong. Whatever happened, I would have to take responsibility for it.

  In my room, before I went to bed, I performed protective and strengthening exercises of both mind and body – the Yogic Salute to the Sun, the ancient Cabalistic Cross, and the more recent Aegis of the Aghama. I prayed to the major dehara, visualising taking their qualities into me. I had instructed the others to perform similar exercises before sleep. To do this alone was important, for we must learn to muster our strengths in solitude as well as when together.

  ‘To those benign powers who hear my voice,’ I whispered into the darkness, ‘guide my steps and those who walk the path with me. Stand at our side and lend us your vigour. Ward us from evil intent. In the name of He Who Walks Beyond the Stars, let it be so.’