by Piper Rayne
I glance back, and sure enough, Ethel is driving Dori’s Cadillac one car back. She gives her friend a thumbs-up, then Austin weaves by the ducks, dodging the oncoming traffic.
Dori peers in the back. “How are you, sweetie?”
Sedona’s busy breathing, her legs clamped together.
“She won’t let me check,” I say, hoping Dori can persuade Sedona.
“Oh no. Switch spots.” Dori unbuckles herself.
Austin’s arm goes out like the mom safety bar across Dori’s chest. “I’m almost there. You hanging in there?” he asks Sedona.
“So this must be a shock to you, Jamison.” Dori settles back down in her seat.
“I’m good, but the contractions are so close. Where did you say Holly is?” Sedona’s head falls to the window.
“Yer okay with this?” I ask Dori.
“I think it’s great,” Dori says. “Sweet actually.”
I nod a few times. I know I’m missing something. I finally snap, needing to know exactly what’s going on. “Come on. Is Austin seriously the father?” I whisper to Sedona.
Her head falls from side to side and she grips her stomach again. “How much longer?”
“We’re here!” Austin says.
The Jeep’s tires squeal around the corner and he slams on his brakes in front of the emergency room entrance.
Dori steps out of the Jeep and I head out on my side, but Austin grabs Sedona before I can, helping her around the back. He tosses me the keys. “Park my Jeep.”
I grab them in the air and Dori pats me on the back. “Austin has to be there for the birth.”
I watch the three of them walk into the emergency room and all I can concentrate on is everything I missed. The last eighteen months weighs on my shoulders. I ruined it all. She’s made a whole life for herself without me in it. I know they’re messing with me about her child being Austin’s baby, which means she wants to shut me out completely.
I round the front of Austin’s Jeep and remember how many times I wanted to drive this thing back in high school. I honestly can’t believe he still owns it. He’s taken really good care of it. After I pull into the parking lot, I sit for a moment and decide I’ll leave the keys at the nurses’ station and take an Uber back to the hotel. I might be a part of Palmer’s future, but I’m clearly not going to be a part of Sedona’s.
I’m crossing the pedestrian walkway when a car whizzes by, parking in a nearby spot.
Holly’s out of her car in a flash. “Hey, Jamison.” She waves and goes in.
Why is she in such a hurry?
Then, as if someone made an announcement over the Lake Starlight PA system, all the Baileys arrive in a parade of cars. Phoenix is the first one out of her car, and she flips me off behind Maverick’s back as they head into the hospital.
My footsteps slow, and by the time I’m inside, Kingston’s already at the nurses’ station. Stella’s coming down another hallway in her white doctor coat.
Ethel pops up beside me without warning, putting her arm through mine. “Escort me to the waiting area.”
It’s the last thing I want to do, but I do as she asks. “Sure.”
We walk into the waiting room and she sits down. Some daytime talk show is playing on the TV in the empty room.
“Can I leave Austin’s keys with you?” I ask, holding them out. “I’m going to head out.”
She stares at the keys in my hand before patting the chair next to her. “You need to sit down.”
“I shouldn’t be here.”
“Damn right you shouldn’t!” Brooklyn’s voice fills the entire room.
“Let’s calm down,” Wyatt says.
“See?” I say to Ethel.
She pats the chair again. “I’m under strict orders to keep you here.”
“By whom?” Brooklyn asks, taking off Lance’s coat and letting him go check out the books and blocks.
“Who do you think? Your grandmother.”
Brooklyn crosses her arms. “I have no idea why Grandma Dori keeps allowing him to linger around. He left Sedona high and dry.”
Wyatt blows out a breath and takes off his suit jacket, heading to where the kids are playing with Lance.
One by one, each Bailey finds their way to the waiting room after finding out that they’re not allowed into the delivery room. Stella comes in for a second to say hi. She tells Kingston to let her know what happens, but she has patients to get back to. She’s now working in the medical offices attached to the hospital. Thank God for Buzz Wheel or I wouldn’t know any of this. They kiss, and when she leaves, Kingston stalks over next to me, picks up a magazine, and hums “Beat It” by Michael Jackson.
I’m about to leave when Austin walks into the waiting room. His eyes find mine first out of everyone, and my gut plummets to the floor below. Something is wrong.
“She’s having an emergency C-section,” he says to the room. “The doctor says it’s okay, but the baby is in distress.”
Kingston stands. “Shouldn’t you be with her?”
“Only one person can go in. Holly’s going to stay with her.” Austin flops down in a chair and buries his head in his hands.
As the family surrounds him, I stalk out of the room, unable to show my real emotions around a family who hates me. I’m almost through the sliding doors, needing some fresh air, when Dori grabs my sleeve and leads me into a small room. She flips the lock but thankfully turns on the lights. This is not the scenario I imagined when I pictured a woman pulling me into a hidden room.
“Listen to me. The whole ballgame just changed. If you want Sedona back, you better straighten up and fly right. This is your time to prove to this family how much you love her and can’t live without her.”
“I don’t understand. Tell me, whose baby is it? Where is he? Why is Holly the one in there holding her hand?”
Her eyebrows scrunch together. “Seriously? You haven’t figured it out? I thought you were an honor student in high school?”
“I am. I was. I’ve asked a zillion times and no one will answer me.”
She taps her finger to my temple. “Come on, Jamison. Use that brain of yours. There’s been no father mentioned and there’s no one here you don’t know. Austin drove her to the hospital and Holly is the one in the operating room with her. Figure it out.”
I think it all over. Them saying Austin is the father. I thought it was a joke. I know Austin and Holly had a hard time conceiving Easton…
Something must show in my eye because Dori nods, confirming what I’m thinking is correct. “She’s carrying Austin and Holly’s baby?”
“Bingo. You should play Words with Friends, it keeps the mind sharp.” She taps her temple and pulls her phone from her purse.
I lean against the wall, processing the information, my breathing labored from the thought of losing her. The one woman I’ve loved my entire adult life is going to have surgery, and because of my own jackass moves, I’m not the one in there with her. All the what-ifs stack up in my brain and topple over, but with that comes a realization.
“So there isn’t another man standing in my way,” I mumble.
“Nope, there’s not.” Dori types something on her phone, not noticing me about to pass out from the sheer fear of never holding Sedona again.
My back slides along the wall as I sink to the floor with my head in my hands.
“Jamison, she’s going to be fine. She’s a Bailey.” Dori doesn’t lean down to comfort me, and she shouldn’t. I’m scum.
“What if something happens during surgery? I could lose her before I’m able to win her back.” I glance up at her. “What have I done?”
Dori steps up, towering over me. Her shoulders fall and her eyes soften. I’ve only ever seen this side of her on Bailey Founder’s Day.
“Get up,” she says.
I shake my head.
“This is my last time asking. Get up,” she says.
I manage to get myself onto my feet.
“Usually I woul
dn’t be so gracious to someone who hurt my grandchild so badly, but I’ve always had a soft spot for you. And I understand what you’re going through. Everyone deserves a second chance, but.” Her finger raises. “Only a second. I don’t do that ‘third times a charm’ crap, you hear me?”
I nod, having no idea what she’s about to say.
“So I’m going to help you have access to Sedona, but I’m not going to convince her to take you back. That’s her decision. But if you ruin this opportunity and my granddaughter and great-granddaughter get hurt, Ethel’s grandson is a hitman and he owes me a lot of favors.”
I laugh.
She doesn’t.
My laugh dies. “Got it. How are you going—”
She holds up her hand. “I’m Dori Bailey. Are you really going to doubt me? Just be prepared when I call you.”
She walks away and opens the door of the small room. Savannah, Liam, Palmer and Brinley walk into the hospital when we get into the hallway. Palmer squirms to get out of Savannah’s arms, but Savannah repositions her and continues walking past us, barely sparing me a glance.
I still have to prove myself not only to Sedona, but her entire family. As uncomfortable as it is, I duck into the waiting area and take a chair away from the rest of them. They talk and reassure Austin that it’s all going to be okay, and I try to take their confidence into my own psyche.
Palmer finds her way over to me and crawls onto the chair next to me before placing her hand in mine. She has no idea what’s going on with her mom right now, but I want to hold her close because she’s part of Sedona and me together. We made her, and she’s perfect. Just like I know Sedona and I will be again.
Nine
Sedona
Having emergency surgery puts a lot of things in perspective. As I lie in the hospital bed, Holly and Austin are tucked in the corner with their newborn daughter, Harper, my thoughts drift back to when they told me I was going in for a C-section. That Harper was in distress and they needed to get her out.
Austin and Holly hugged and decided she’d be the one to stay with me. I saw the tug-of-war in Austin’s eyes. Sure, his primary concern was Harper, but his second was me. How fast things can change and become beyond your control.
I felt the fear too. What if something happened to me? What would happen to Palmer? Sure, my family would raise her, but Jamison would have a right to her too.
I watch them smile and nuzzle Harper closer. Holly’s tears only controllable for short stints. It takes me back to when I delivered Palmer and it was Phoenix holding my hand, the two of us cuddled in the twin-size hospital bed, pointing out every Bailey characteristic on my daughter’s face, acting as if her fair skin and narrow nose weren’t clear signs of the Ferguson genes. As if I had somehow immaculately birthed a baby with no father.
For the past eighteen months, I’ve pushed the topic of her father as far as I could, never considering what would happen to Palmer if something happened to me. Now Jamison is here, in Lake Starlight, asking to be a part of her life. I can’t very well shut the door in his face. My siblings have their own lives. It’s time that I address the fact that he’s going to be a part of ours.
The nurse comes in and interrupts my thoughts, wanting to take Harper for some tests. Holly follows, but Austin walks over to my bedside.
“You ready for visitors?” he asks. “You had a lot of people scared.”
“Could you have someone bring Palmer to me?”
He nods, squeezes my hand, and leaves the room.
A few minutes later, Grandma Dori steps into the room with Palmer.
Mommy. She smiles, but I can tell she’s confused as to why I’m in this bed.
Grandma Dori helps Palmer crawl up onto the bed. I tuck her to my side, trying to steer clear of my stitches. I have no idea how I’m going to get through this recovery while chasing after her.
Grandma Dori sits in a chair by the bedside. “How are you, dear?”
“I’m good. Not too sore yet since all the drugs are flowing through my system still. I’ll be here for three days. I need to find someone to take care of Palmer, then even when I get home, I’ll have restrictions.”
I hate being unable to care for my own child. I’m happy I helped Austin and Holly have another baby, but I didn’t realize I’d be in this position. I assumed my physical recovery would be like it was after Palmer, but without the sleepless nights.
Grandma Dori pats my hand. “I’ll help you, and as for Palmer, she can stay with me.”
“With you?” I raise my eyebrows.
Palmer rests her head on my chest and wraps her arm around me. From the increasing weight of her body on me, I’m positive she’s falling asleep.
“Yes, Sedona, I can take care of a child. I had a son, and who do you think helped your mother wrangle you all?”
“I didn’t mean to offend you, but will the retirement community even allow Palmer to stay there?” One night is one thing, three is a whole other. Plus, Grandma doesn’t drive anymore, which means Palmer will be riding in Grandma’s Caddy with Ethel behind the wheel. What am I thinking? I need a quick excuse to get out of this situation. “Thanks for the offer, but Palmer doesn’t sleep well in other places. I’ll just ask Kingston and Stella to come stay with her at our house. But I’d really appreciate it if once I’m discharged, you could come over and help me during the day. Maybe take her to the park and stuff.”
Her smile says I’ve won her over enough. I doubt she really wanted Palmer at night anyway. “Perfect. I’ll get your apartment situated.”
I wave her off. “Oh no, I’m fine.”
“Nonsense.” She pats my hand again. “There’s someone who really wants to see you.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’m not ready.”
But she disappears out the door, not listening. No real surprise there.
I sigh. Staring at Palmer’s sleeping body next to me, I run my hand over her dark hair and down her chubby arms. She’s never been away from me for even one night. I have no idea how she’s going to handle the separation.
A large figure fills the doorway in my peripheral and my heart gallops. I glance up, and he rushes into the room as if I granted him permission.
“Damn it, Sedona, I was so scared.” He comes to the other side of the bed, opposite Palmer. His calloused palm slides into my hand and he covers the back of my hand with his other one, sandwiching mine between both of his. A shiver runs up my arm. “Yer good? Everything’s good?” His gaze falls down my body, inspecting every inch.
“I’m fine.”
“Did you have a C-section with Palmer?” His eyes concentrate on the area of my incision underneath my hospital gown.
“No. I had her vaginally.”
He nods a few times, fast, as if he’s really concerned. His hands squeeze mine. “I’m just so happy yer all right. I was so scared.”
I’m not sure what to do with his fearful expression. There’s so much animosity living inside me that my first reaction is to ask him why he cares now when he didn’t care all these months we’ve been apart. But my anger isn’t going to help Palmer, so I nod. “I’ll be fine, but you should know a few things.”
“Okay.” His blue eyes are wide and attentive.
“I’m here for three days. I’m hoping to get out sooner, but I don’t know if that will happen. Then once I’m discharged, I’ll have some restrictions—I can’t drive for two weeks, I’ll only be able to go up the stairs once a day, I can’t lift anything heavy.” When I pause, his mouth opens. I’m sure it’s to say he’ll pick up the slack, and I hate the small part of me that feels bad I’m about to crush that hopeful expression on his face. “I’m going to ask Kingston and Stella to watch Palmer while I’m in here. She’s most familiar with them.”
His hand leaves mine to push through his hair. “Yeah, of course.” His vision darts to her before coming back to me.
“Jamison—”
He shakes his head. “I get it. I do. Do you think they’ll l
et me see her?”
I inhale a deep breath. There’s a longing in his eyes that I’ve yet to see from him since he’s popped back into our lives. He’s gotten a small taste of her and he’s concerned I’m stripping that away from him.
“I’ll make sure of it.” The words are hard to get out, but Palmer deserves to know her dad.
He blows out a breath and Palmer stirs in my arms.
“Maybe you can have her during the day. Stella works at her practice and Kingston might have a shift at the fire department.”
“Is he not smoke jumping anymore?” he asks.
Questions like that make me realize how much he’s missed. “No. He stopped because he wants to be with Stella. The smoke jumping just took him away for too long at a time.”
“So he’s just working in Anchorage now?”
I nod. “Yeah. But he’s twenty-four hours on and forty-eight hours off.”
“Okay.” He nods and thinks of his next words, seeming unsure but then blurts them out. “Can I help you after you get home?”
That would be the most logical option, but I’m not stupid. The small fluttering in my stomach when I’m in Jamison’s presence is already alive and taking care of someone can be intimate especially after having a baby. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. But we can plan days you can come and see Palmer.”
His gaze moves to her as though he’s figuring out how to play this. Eventually, he nods and clears his throat. “There’re a lot of people who want to see you.” Standing, he steps away from the bed.
How is it that I feel like the bad guy here?
“Can you take her with you? I’m going to talk to Kingston.” I know telling him that Jamison will be over to visit with Palmer won’t be the most pleasant conversation.
“Really?” His eyes sparkle and the corners of his mouth turn up. “Sure.”
Palmer transfers easier than I prefer, finding her favorite position over his chest. Damn, he looks good with her. Too good. Edible kind of good. That’s exactly why he cannot help me next week.