While my mother had understood my desire to meet my daughter, my father had insisted I was making a big mistake. I’d tried talking to him about it, but the stubborn man had refused to listen.
When I finished praying, I slid back beside my mother. At the far end of the pew, Jillian’s husband, Keith, shot me a sympathetic smile. Keith was a recovering alcoholic, and we’d talked extensively how binge eating was similar to alcohol abuse.
We both believed prayer was a powerful tool in combating one’s addiction, so he probably thought overeating was the reason for my fervent prayer today. Well, he and everyone else would find out soon enough what was on my mind.
Chapter 3
Bianca
After church, Vicki and I drove to our family’s small hobby ranch situated on the south side of the mountain. Technically, the mountain was a large hill in the center of the island, but locals had been calling it the mountain for years.
In addition to organic farms and free-range ranches, the mountain boasted several farm-to-table restaurants surrounded by fields of wildflowers. This time of year, the winter roses were still in bloom, but in a few weeks, they would be replaced by daisies, bluebonnets, and hundreds of other breathtaking wildflowers.
As Vicki and I drove down the gravel driveway toward the house, I took in the familiar sight of chickens, cows, horses, and goats grazing in the fields. Usually, the dogs sounded the alarm with their barking, but they must’ve been out in the barn with my dad because I didn’t see them.
At dinner, I sat between my nephews, waiting for the perfect opportunity to share my news. Once dessert was served, I took a deep breath and opened my mouth to speak.
Before I could say anything, Jillian’s youngest son, fourteen-year-old Drew, interrupted me. “Aunt Bianca, can you please pass the caramel sauce?”
“Of course.” I slid the little plate containing the mason jar of homemade caramel to Drew and watched as he dumped it on his gingerbread cake.
Jillian’s oldest son, Matt, groaned. “Save some for the rest of us, why don’t you?”
“I did.”
“No, you didn’t.”
Jillian shot both boys a warning look. Then she glanced at her husband who was too busy arguing with my dad about some political issue to notice her plea for help.
Not that Jillian needed Keith’s help. Like all Morgan women, she was strong, independent, and capable of standing up for herself. Since the birth of her daughter a few weeks ago, however, she seemed tired, which she probably was.
“Matthew,” my mother said, shifting Jillian’s baby in her arms, “there’s more caramel sauce in the refrigerator if you’d like to get it.”
“I’ll get it.” Drew jumped to his feet and headed to the kitchen.
As soon as he left, Matt reached across me to steal a forkful of his little brother’s cake.
“Oh, you’re going to get in trouble for that,” I said, teasing him.
“Get in trouble for what?” He smiled at me innocently.
Laughing, I shook my head. For the most part, my nephews were sweet boys, but like most siblings, they bickered and gave each other a hard time. One thing they never argued about, however, was their darling baby sister, Linda Faith. Although my new niece was a little on the fussy side, her brothers adored her as did the rest of us.
I glanced at my mother, holding the baby. Had my own daughter been fortunate enough to have aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents in her life? Had she read my letter yet? What did she think? What if she was trying to call me right now?
I snuck a quick peek at my phone, disappointed to see no new messages. Matt nudged me with his elbow. “No phones at the table, Aunt Bianca. You know the rule.”
I rolled my eyes and stuck my phone back into my pocket. “Thanks for the reminder, Matt.”
We grinned at each other, and I was struck by how much he and his brother had grown in the past year. I was lucky to live so close to them. I missed my other nieces and nephews who currently lived abroad. It’d been almost a year since we last saw them. Hopefully, Nick and Anna would receive orders to come back to the States soon.
When Drew returned from the kitchen, I decided it was now or never. Clinking my spoon against my glass to get everyone’s attention, I came to my feet. “Sorry for the interruption, but I have an announcement to make.”
“An announcement?” Drew shoved a bite of cake into his mouth. “What is it?”
I looked at my father who was staring down at his plate, avoiding my gaze. “Well, it’s just that . . .” I hesitated, second-guessing myself. After keeping the secret for so long, I was suddenly nervous.
“Please don’t tell me you’re moving out of your apartment,” Vicki said. “Do you know how long it took me to train you to be a good neighbor? I really don’t want to have to break in someone else.”
“You’re moving?” Jillian said.
I smiled. “No, I’m not moving. I . . . well, do you remember how I went to South Carolina my last year of high school?”
“No,” Drew said, completely serious.
Matt flicked his little brother’s arm. “Of course, you don’t remember. You weren’t even alive back then.”
“Oh yeah.”
“Oh yeah,” Matt repeated, sarcastically.
Ignoring them both, I continued, wanting to get this over with. “Well, I left Rose Island because I was pregnant.”
“What?” Vicki’s perfectly plucked brow lifted.
“I was pregnant,” I repeated. “I had a baby and gave her up for adoption. She was a little girl.”
Jillian shot a quick glance at Keith, but Vicki and my nephews just stared at me as if waiting for the punch line. I often joked around, so they probably thought I was kidding.
“Well, that’s it. That’s my big announcement.” Sitting back down, I nodded. “My daughter is eighteen today. I always told myself I’d contact her when she turned eighteen. That’s why I’m telling you this. I sent a letter through the adoption agency. She’s supposed to receive it this morning. They said they’d deliver it via private courier since the post office is closed today, so hopefully, she’ll get it.”
Picking up my phone, I looked at Matt. “That’s why I’ve been checking my cell. I’m hoping she’ll receive my letter, read it, and call.”
Stunned silence dominated the room. All eyes, except my father’s, focused on me.
“You’re serious?” Vicki said.
“I am.”
Jillian brushed back her long honey-brown hair. “I always wondered, but you never wanted to talk about that year you were gone.”
“I know,” I said.
“So, when do we get to meet her?” Drew asked.
“I don’t know.” I refrained from checking my phone again. “I guess it will depend on whether or not she wants to meet me.”
“Why wouldn’t she want to meet you?” Drew asked. “You’re awesome, Aunt Bianca.”
“Thanks, honey.” My heart lifted at his loyalty. Then doubt crept in as I thought of all the reasons why my daughter might not want to meet me.
Maybe she resented being adopted. Maybe her parents had never told her she was adopted, so she didn’t even know about me.
Or maybe . . . my stomach twisted at this last horrible thought. Maybe, like my younger brother, this child of mine was no longer living. I pushed away the morbid idea. Surely, the adoption agency would’ve contacted me if that were the case.
“Well,” Drew said, a mischievous tone in his voice, “if she’s eighteen, I guess that means Matt’s not the oldest cousin anymore.”
Matt shrugged and dished up another piece of cake. I was so nervous that I wanted another piece of cake, too. You can’t solve this problem with food, I reminded myself.
Drew took a sip of his drink. “Who’s the baby’s father?”
“Drew,” Jillian chastised.
“What? I’m just curious.”
“It’s not an appropriate question,” Keith said.
“Oh, sorry.”
“That’s okay,” I said.
My dad pushed away from the table and came to his feet. “Please excuse me. I need to check on the dogs. Lady pulled a muscle in her leg, and . . .” He gave my mother a nod before turning and leaving the dining room without further explanation.
My stomach twisted. Having him walk away like that nearly killed me. Why did he have to be so stubborn and unsupportive? There wasn’t anything wrong with Lady. He was just using her as an excuse.
Keith offered a sympathetic smile before addressing his boys. “Come on, guys. Let’s clear the table and start on the dishes so the ladies can talk.”
“But I want to hear more about Aunt Bianca’s baby,” Drew said.
“Later.” Keith stacked several plates, setting the silverware on top. His boys did the same, clearing everything in one trip.
“Thanks, babe,” Jillian said.
Keith winked at his wife. “You’re welcome.”
My mom, Vicki, and I thanked him as well, then my mother said she was going to check on our father. “I’m sure Lady will be fine, but you know how your father gets. He loves his dogs.”
No kidding, I thought.
“Do you want to leave the baby with me?” Jillian asked.
“No, I’ve got her.” Propping the infant on her shoulder, my mother left the room.
For a few moments, my sisters and I sat in silence. Then, Vicki winked at me. “You always were great at finding an excuse to get out of doing the dishes.”
I laughed. “You’re one to talk.”
Jillian shook her head. “You both were always disappearing, leaving me to clean the kitchen by myself.”
I lifted my chin. “Well, we can’t all be the responsible, oldest child. Avoiding chores is my superpower as the forgotten middle child.”
They both groaned, making me relieved they weren’t upset I’d kept this secret from them. I considered Vicki and Jillian two of my closest friends, and I didn’t want anything to come between us.
“There were rumors you were pregnant when you left Rose Island,” Vicki began. “Somehow, Marcus convinced me you’d gone away for weight loss.”
“Weight loss?”
She nodded. “You did come back a lot thinner.”
“I did, but that’s because I lost a ton of weight after the baby was born. I can’t believe this whole time you thought I was at fat camp.”
“I knew that rumor wasn’t true,” Jillian said. “Mom told me you needed to get away from the crowd you were hanging out with. I thought you were having an issue with drugs or alcohol.”
“Wow,” I said sardonically. “I don’t know which I prefer—fat camp, secret pregnancy, or rehab. Such great choices.” I laughed at the absurdity of it all, and my sisters both smiled.
Vicki peeked over her shoulder, before looking back at us. “Dad’s not taking it well, I see.”
I shrugged, wishing his behavior didn’t hurt so much. “He says I’m making a mistake by contacting her. He thinks I’m going to ruin her life or something.”
“He’ll be okay.” Jillian spoke in her oldest-sister-knows-best voice. “Sometimes, it just takes him a while to process things.”
Vicki nodded. “That’s true. Remember how he didn’t think we should buy the building downtown? In the end, he helped us negotiate terms for the mortgage as well as helped with the renovations.”
“You’re right.” I took a sip of my iced tea. “I just hate disappointing him.”
“Don’t we all,” Jillian said, even though she was Dad’s favorite and had never disappointed him.
Me, on the other hand . . . I’d been one disappointment after another. At least, that’s how it felt sometimes.
Vicki brushed an invisible crumb off her silk blouse. “Was it horrible being away your senior year? You gave birth in March, but you didn’t come home until that summer.”
“I wanted to finish school out there, and no, it wasn’t horrible. Aunt Wynona was good to me. I made friends with a retired librarian who lived next door. She kindled my love of reading, introducing me to all sorts of books I’d never heard of before. Saying good-bye to the baby and wondering about her was the hardest part. Well, that and not telling anyone.”
“Does Anna know?” Jillian asked, referring to our sister-in-law who’d once been married to our deceased brother, Marcus. Anna now lived in Germany with her new husband, Nick Peterson, and their four kids.
I shook my head. “No. I’ll tell her tonight when we talk on the phone.”
“Why didn’t you tell us before now?” Vicki asked.
I shrugged. “Mom and Dad encouraged me not to. They thought it’d be easier to get on with my life if I wasn’t thinking about the baby all the time.”
“Was it?” Jillian asked, her arms looking empty without her own baby.
I glanced out the window at my mother’s large organic garden surrounded by pecan trees. “I’ve had a good life, but not a day has passed without me thinking about her. I guess I’ve always worried she might’ve gotten more of her father’s genes than mine.”
Vicki lowered her voice. “Chad?”
I nodded. “How’d you know?”
“Just a hunch.”
Not wanting to think about Chad or how he’d reacted when I told him about the pregnancy, I reached into my purse and withdrew the framed photo. “In the hospital nursery, when I was saying good-bye to my baby, one of the nurses took this photo.”
Jillian reached for the photo and smiled. “Oh, Bianca, she’s beautiful. She looks exactly like Linda Faith, doesn’t she?”
Even though I’d spent hours staring at the picture, I leaned closer to get a better look. “You think so?”
“Yes. Our daughters have the same eyes.”
My heart warmed at my sister’s words.
“I don’t know,” Vicki said. “People are always trying to find familiar characteristics in newborns, but I think all babies look alike.”
“That’s because you’re not a mother yet.” Jillian placed a hand on Vicki’s shoulder. “Once you have your own baby, you’ll be able to see those slight differences.”
Our youngest sister made a scoffing sound. “Like having my own baby is ever going to happen. I can’t even find a decent man.”
“Well, it’s not going to happen with that attitude,” Jillian said.
Vicki sighed. “I know. It’s just discouraging. While I’m happy that you and Anna have dropped out of the Morgan Sister Spinsters’ Club—”
“You’re jealous,” I said, speaking more for myself than Vicki.
Vicki nodded. “Yes, I guess I am a little jealous. It’s not like I’ve stopped trying. I just haven’t found anyone I can imagine spending the rest of my life with.”
“What about Seth Watson?” Jillian said, referring to our neighbor who’d been in love with Vicki since the beginning of time.
“Seth? No. He’s too young,” Vicki said.
“He’s just five years younger than you,” I pointed out.
Vicki shrugged. “I know, but he was Marcus’s friend, and it just feels a little weird.”
I raised my brow. “You obviously haven’t seen the man in his turnout gear. Maybe before discounting him, you should consider taking some blueberry muffins to the fire station.”
She batted a hand through the air. “I know he’s cute—”
“Cute?” I said. “Have you seen those dimples?”
Vicki groaned. “If you’re so in love with him, why don’t you date him?”
I shrugged. “He’s not really my type.”
“Well, I don’t think he’s really my type either.”
“I guess we’ll just stay single forever, then.”
“Don’t say that,” Jillian scolded. “You’re both beautiful women. If God’s plan for you includes marriage, He’ll make it happen.”
Vicki sighed. “I hope so.”
I nodded. “Me, too.”
But at that moment, I realized I could easily
live without finding Mr. Right as long as God’s plan included meeting my daughter.
Chapter 4
Claudia
Kansas
Sitting on her bed, Claudia stared down at the letter from her birth mom. Thank goodness the courier had come when her parents were at the grocery store this morning.
She didn’t want Mom and Dad dealing with this. Not now. Not today on what was supposed to be a celebration for both her eighteenth birthday and her father’s recovery from prostate cancer.
It’d been a rough year. This time last spring, her father had undergone surgery. Months of chemotherapy had followed. Thankfully, doctors now expected Dad to survive.
Over the sounds of her little brothers wrestling in the hallway, the doorbell rang. Claudia sighed with relief.
Leland.
Standing, she folded the letter in half and stuck it in her back pocket. Eager to talk to her boyfriend, she ran out of her bedroom just in time to see seven-year-old Clark pin six-year-old Clay to the floor.
“Who’s the boss of you now?” Clark asked.
“Let me go,” Clay shouted, kicking his legs as he twisted back and forth.
“Aren’t you two supposed to be cleaning up for my party?” Claudia asked in a voice that was half serious and half teasing.
“What do you think we’ve been doing for the past ten hours?” Clark asked.
“Yeah, right.” Claudia groaned. Despite what her parents thought, her little brothers were worthless when it came to cleaning. As usual, she’d probably have to do their chores in addition to her own. “Mom and Dad will be home in ten minutes, so you’d better finish up.”
“Or what?” they both asked.
The doorbell rang again, and not bothering to reply to her brothers’ question, she headed downstairs. As soon as she peeked through the glass door and saw Leland standing on the front porch, her tension eased. Not all of it, of course, but most of it.
Happy to see him, she flung open the door. They’d only been dating since the beginning of college last fall, but already they were extremely close and told each other everything. Although they were both freshmen, Claudia was actually a year younger since she’d been homeschooled and had graduated early from high school.
Bianca's Joy: Rose Island Book 3 Page 2