Slowly, I pulled the hood back and looked around El’s broad frame to check that the coast was clear. My manager, Ed, was nowhere in sight. I breathed a sigh of relief.
“What was that about?” Tin asked.
“That was my boss. If I get caught in here, it’s not gonna be pretty, so if you see him coming, let me know.”
“Hey there!” A bright voice made us all turn around. “Can I help you folks with the TVs?”
A young guy wearing the uniform I wore to work every day was smiling brightly at us. It was a big store, and I didn’t know everyone, but his nametag said “Mark.”
“No thanks, Mark.” Tin slapped him on the back. “We were just watching The Grinch.”
“Oh. Haha!” Mark laughed awkwardly. “Yeah, that’s a great movie.”
We walked away, in search of the rest of the presents I had to replace.
As we worked our way down through each section, I gathered a robe and slippers for Mom, a necklace for my sister, and vases and T-shirts and ties and toys for cousins, nieces, and nephews.
In the menswear section, Ed’s bald head once again appeared a few rows over, and I pulled Max down into a crouch with me behind a rack of leather coats.
“Why am I hiding?” Max asked. “He doesn’t know me.”
“Shh.” I just covered his mouth and waited until Ed moved off. Then I wondered if I should get my dad cufflinks to add to his present—even though all the gifts I’d gathered so far would cost me more than I’d originally paid for them.
In the accessories department, right between ladieswear and intimates, Ed strode up to lean on the counter and chat with the workers there. They looked completely frazzled, rushing around to replenish displays between serving customers, but he just leaned . . . Casually . . . Asshole.
I pulled my hood up and acted very interested in a spinning display of earrings while Tin did his best to make me laugh. He held up pair after pair, each one bigger and more ostentatious than the last, and checked himself out in the mirror.
When I thought I might explode from trying to hold in the giggles, I walked away, grabbing the first purple thing I saw. Cousin Annie had a thing for purple; I figured it didn’t really matter that they were three times the size of anything the petite woman wore or that they cost four times what I’d planned to spend on her. Although she had gotten me a very expensive-looking handbag for my last birthday, so maybe I should be spending even more?
“Hey, Sadie, is any of your stuff here?” El asked. I’d been so busy obsessing over gifts and keeping an eye out for Ed, I hadn’t realized we’d walked into the lingerie section.
“Oh! No. My stuff isn’t in any stores.” I laughed and ducked my head.
“How come?” He frowned.
“I don’t know. I’m a nobody. I occasionally sell a few sets online, but working full time, I hardly have time to design and make new pieces, let alone work on marketing and getting my stuff seen.” I shrugged.
“Can we see?” Max asked.
“Yeah, show us.” Tin grinned.
“You want to see my underwear?” I asked teasingly.
“Yes!” Tin nodded.
“No.” Max’s eyes widened. “I mean . . .”
“We want to see your work, Sadie.” El crossed his arms and fixed me with a serious look.
“Not right now,” I said. “We have too much to do. We should move away from here. This is the section where I usually work, so I’m bound to bump into someone I know.”
They let me rush past, my arms full of gifts. I’d even handed a bunch of things to each of my elf helpers. They followed me silently to the ground floor, but I heard them whispering on the escalator behind me.
When we reached the bottom, I turned on them. “What?”
They all snapped their heads up to look at me, eyes wide. The snow globe was poking out of Max’s pocket, and he tucked it back inside.
“It’s stopped charging. It was doing all right, but it seems to have stalled for some reason,” Max explained.
“Oh.” I shuffled my feet. There I was getting worked up and being shitty to them because I thought they were whispering about me behind my back, when in reality, they were just worried about thousands of children getting their gifts on Christmas Eve.
“Sadie?”
My spine stiffened at that voice, and the “sorry” I’d been about to say turned to ash in my mouth.
I prayed that I’d heard wrong, that there was another Sadie nearby, that it wasn’t him. But then he tapped my shoulder, and I turned to come face to face with my ex.
The Cheer
Brian had blond hair, but it wasn’t soft and shiny like Tin’s—it was kind of wiry and dull—and his brown eyes were swimming with amusement. He tucked his hands into the pockets of his wool peacoat, which he had on over an expensive suit—he always wore an expensive suit. Even when we were together and I was into him, for some reason, I’d never gotten to tear the suave outfits off him. He always insisted on undressing and neatly draping the expensive fabric over a chair before we had sex. What the hell did I ever see in this douche?
“I thought it was you.” He smiled, as if he hadn’t “popped in” to the store and “bumped into me” at least once a week since we broke up. “I was hoping to bump into you.”
“Hey, Brian.” I sighed and shifted all the stuff in my arms. “Actually, I’m—”
“Did they change the uniforms or something?” he interrupted. He pointed to the guys coats behind me, then gestured up and down my body at El’s matching coat. “Christmas all the way?”
“No, they didn’t. I’m actually not working tonight.”
“Oh? Then what are you doing here? And what’s with the matching outfits?” He frowned at the guys again, looking them up and down in that way men do when sizing each other up.
I decided not to get into it. I just wanted to be as far away from him as possible. “Look, I really need to get moving and—”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m in a hurry too,” he interrupted me again. “Listen, I just need your help real quick. Can you tell me which bra and panties are a good brand or whatever?” He rolled his eyes with a smile.
“Excuse me?”
“Like, what’s a good one? Nice lingerie.” He leaned over with his hand next to his mouth, as if he were telling me a secret. “I left Tania’s gift to the last second.”
Tania was the woman he was currently seeing. He’d mentioned her the last three times we’d “bumped into each other” . . . at my work . . . while I was working.
“You want me to help you pick out panties for your girlfriend?” I raised my eyebrows.
He just shrugged as if it was no big deal. “Yeah. I mean, you know your shit, right? This is your thing.”
“You didn’t seem to think I ‘knew my shit’ when we were dating,” I half mumbled, unable to keep the comment in.
“What? I thought we were cool, Sadie.”
“Wait a minute.” El handed the few gifts he was carrying to Tin and stepped forward. “You’re asking your ex to help you pick out lingerie for your current girlfriend? Dude . . .” He just shook his head.
“What?” Brian frowned. “What’s the big deal? Who are you?”
“Bro, that’s pretty disrespectful to both women.” Tin stepped forward, then deftly caught a box of perfume that slipped off the pile of my shit he was holding.
“And who are you? And who’s that guy?” Brian pointed to Max, who was standing back but frowning at the whole exchange.
“You know what?” El pointed a finger at Brian’s chest. “I’m Sadie’s—”
“Stop!” I cut him off. “Brian, it’s none of your business who they are. We broke up six months ago—nothing I do is any of your business anymore. And it’s weird and inappropriate to ask me to help you buy lingerie for your girlfriend. And stop coming here, for fuck’s sake. Find somewhere else to shop. Now, we’re leaving.”
I turned and started walking away. My new elf friends followed with proud, sm
ug looks on their faces.
“What the fuck, Sadie?” Brian called after me, sounding bewildered. “I thought we were cool? Why are you being a bitch?”
I whirled around, my blood boiling and my hands shaking. I’d kept it all in—reluctant to cause more drama by saying anything to him, ranting to Monica instead—but now it came bursting out of me.
“We are not cool, asshole! You treated me like shit, and you’re still doing it! Leave me the fuck alone!”
“Don’t call her a bitch.” Max’s voice was low, his face completely devoid of emotion, yet the words came off more menacing than if he’d gotten in Brian’s face and screamed them. Brian’s eyes widened, and he took a small step back.
Several people had stopped to stare at my outburst. To make matters worse, I spotted my boss hurrying toward us through the crowd.
“Shit,” I muttered, and we rushed away, getting lost in the shoppers and weaving through displays.
The toy section was the messiest area of the store—it had been practically torn apart by people desperate to make sure their kids had the shiniest new things for Christmas. But the chaos made it easy to hide in a back corner.
“Sadie, you OK?” Tin asked, his usually chipper voice low. They all watched me with worried faces.
“Yes.” I gave them a weak smile. “No. I don’t know. He gets to me, you know? And the worst thing is, I just realized I’ve been letting him get to me. Ugh! And I still don’t have all the gifts I need and . . .” I trailed off, my mouth opening and closing like a fish.
“I’m really glad you stood up for yourself, loud as it was.” El gave me a wry smile.
“Uh, guys.” Max held up the snow globe. “We have bigger issues.”
We all leaned in to look. It wasn’t as dull and lifeless as it had been at the very start, but it had certainly lost some of the magic that had appeared at the ice rink and the homeless shelter.
Tin took it and brought it up close to his face, his brow furrowed.
“Oh no,” I breathed. “What happened?”
They exchanged loaded looks, then Max sighed and explained.
“It seems the power core is more connected to you than we thought, Sadie.”
“Me? What? How?”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “We’re not sure.”
“We suspected it was related to your . . . enthusiasm for the holiday spirit to an extent,” El added, “but it seems you have more effect on it than we thought.”
“I don’t understand.”
“We don’t fully understand it either.” He shrugged. “Like we explained earlier, we don’t know all there is to know about Christmas magic and never will. But it did malfunction just as we were passing over you. What were you doing just before we crashed?”
I cleared my throat and looked around awkwardly. “I was grumbling about passive-aggressive texts from my family and how this was the worst Christmas ever. I’d just decided to go back up to my apartment, tear down all my decorations, get trashed, and watch a horror movie.”
Tin looked horrified as he tucked the globe into his pocket, slightly angling his body away as if to protect it from me.
Max pinched the bridge of his nose.
El just smirked. “Look, I’m not saying your giving up on Christmas was what made us crash, but it probably contributed to it. And all the stuff we’ve been doing, it’s definitely helping to recharge the power core, but it seems to get the biggest boost when you do something particularly . . . nice.”
“Like the kids at the concert,” Tin reminded me.
“And convincing Alan to get involved with the homeless shelter,” Max added.
“And now you’re not feeling particularly cheerful and . . .” El cringed and gestured to Tin’s pocket.
My heart sank.
I’d literally ruined Christmas. I was like the Grinch but worse.
Tears welled in my eyes. Every time I saw Brian, he managed to make me feel like shit. Now, on top of all that—on top of the stolen presents and derailed Christmas Eve—I was supposed to be responsible for fixing everything?
I looked between them with wide eyes, clutching the clothes and boxes and other gifts closer to my chest. “I can’t do this. It’s too much pressure. I’m just . . . nobody.”
A tear escaped and trailed down my cheek as my breathing got shallow.
They all frowned, but it was Max who stepped forward. “You are not nobody.”
I just shook my head and lowered my gaze to the ground. That tequila and slasher flick were sounding pretty good again.
Max handed the items he was holding to El, then took half of mine and shoved those on top.
“What are you doing?” I sniffled as he took the rest of my presents and loaded them onto Tin’s pile.
“Just give us a minute, guys.” Max grabbed my hand and pulled me down the aisle.
He dragged me to the edge of the toy section, where an elaborately decorated “Photos with Santa” area was closed off and dark. The pretend Santa had gone home hours ago—there were no more kids around to take photos.
Like the rebel I didn’t think he was, Max lifted the red velvet rope blocking off the entry and pulled me through the archway, which was resplendent with garlands, dripping with bows and candy canes.
“I don’t think we’re supposed to be here,” I murmured.
He just shrugged. “I’m an elf. We practically run this shit.”
Despite the dreadful mood I was in, I cracked a smile.
Once we were around the corner, out of sight of the bright store beyond and off to the side of the big red chair, he finally stopped and turned to me.
With a sigh, he propped his hands on his hips.
“I’m sorry.” I rubbed my arm. “I don’t think I’m cut out for this.”
“Bullshit.” The word was forceful but not angry or frustrated. I didn’t feel like he was upset with me, but the assertive tone coming from the usually quiet, reserved Max was surprising. “Sadie, you were made for this.”
When I didn’t respond, he kept speaking. “You rushed to see if we were OK when we crashed without having any idea who we were. You’re caring. You’ve listened to all our sob stories and not for a second made us feel any less normal compared to your full, happy family. You’re kind.” He started to tick things off on his fingers. “You’ve seen as many Christmas movies as Tin. You dress up and decorate without being forced to. Your eyes light up with wonder at every new Christmas-magic element we show you. You make a genuine effort to not only get thoughtful gifts but spend time with your family at Christmas. Despite the slight bump in the road when everything seemed to go wrong at once, you fucking love Christmas. From everything you’ve told me, you always have.
“I don’t know why that damn globe is so connected to you”—he waved his hand dismissively—“and we probably never will, but if you think for one second that you can’t help us recharge it, you are so damn wrong.”
“You make some very good points,” I grumbled. His sweet speech had made a warm, fuzzy feeling appear in my chest. I so badly wanted to get over my insecurities and just get back to work, but they were hard to let go of. “I just . . . I don’t know. It’s a lot of pressure, and I kind of feel like I’m holding you back.”
Max grabbed both my hands and guided me over to a bench off to the side. During the day, it was lined with kids waiting for their turn with Santa; now, it was just Max, facing me, his legs on either side of the seat.
“I don’t know what that asshole did to you, but I promise, every negative thing he ever told you about yourself was a lie. You can do this. Christmas is kind of my thing, and I can see the spark in your eye.” As if on cue, the red glint of magic glowed in his gaze, mesmerizing me and making me smile. “Please, Sadie, we can’t do this without you.”
I stared sidelong at his earnest face and thought about what he was saying—really thought about it. Maybe he was right. I’d gotten wrapped up in my own shit, and I’d let Brian get under my skin aga
in instead of thinking of the bigger picture.
Taking a deep breath, I turned to face Max fully. “OK, you’re right. I can do this. We can do this. I’m sorry I got so sidetracked and overwhelmed.”
He gave me a brilliant smile and squeezed my hands. “There she is.”
“Shit!” Now that my crisis was over, panic hit me. “What time is it? Are we gonna make it?”
“Calm down.” Max’s firm grip on my hands kept me from shooting up off the bench. “We still have an hour or so, and despite it dulling a bit, the globe doesn’t have that much charge left to replenish. With you back on board, we got this.”
“You sure?” The kids, the presents!
“I’m sure. Now, come here and hug it out.” He dropped my hands to open his arms out wide.
Without hesitation, I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, my fingers gliding through the soft red fur on his coat.
His fresh-snow-and-gingerbread smell assaulted my senses in the most wonderful way. I wanted to take a deep breath—the kind of breath you take when you open the door and realize it snowed all night. I also wanted to lick him, the way I lick the icing off gingerbread cookies.
I pulled back slowly, but his arms tightened before releasing me—he wanted to let me go about as much as I wanted to back away. My cheek scraped his. He turned his head just a fraction in my direction, his eyes downcast. My breath hitched. And then we were kissing.
It was tentative at first, his lips soft and gentle against mine. Then it built. I don’t know if it was me or him who pushed it further, but all of a sudden, his tongue was in my mouth, and mine was pushing right back.
He stroked my cheek with his thumb, his other hand sliding up my ribs. I scooted forward on the bench until I was in his lap, my legs draped over his on either side of his hips.
He was straddling the bench, and I was straddling him as we kissed passionately, our lips not parting even for breath.
With a confident hand at my upper back, he pressed me against his chest. I gripped his shoulder tightly and rolled my hips, finding him already rock hard for me. He groaned, which only spurred on my own arousal.
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