by Kadie Scott
Beth’s heart constricted. Had Autry seen it too? Was that why he’d asked her to marry him.
When she didn’t say anything, an impassable wall slammed down in Dylan’s eyes. “Never mind,” he muttered.
Saying no to Autry, and now to the precious child in front of her, was the hardest thing Beth had ever done. Especially when the image it painted in her mind so closely aligned with her own secret wishes. Wishes she couldn’t let herself acknowledge, or she’d never get through this. “We won’t let you get lost in the system. No matter what, we will always be here for you.”
“Yeah. But you don’t want to adopt me.”
She was losing Dylan. She could feel him slipping away like sand through a sieve. “That’s not true. We both love you.”
“Whatever.”
The school bell clanged, making her jump. For the first time in ages, she resented that dang bell. In a few seconds, other students would start filing into her room. Without another word, Dylan wiped his face on his sleeve, grabbed his backpack and went out into the hall to hang it up on the hooks out there.
Unable to do more right that second, Beth went to her desk and grabbed a box of tissues, dabbing at her eyes.
What a mess.
The rest of the school day dragged. Dylan had slumped in his chair, unresponsive and not participating, worse even than before. For once, she let it slide, not pressing him to join in the class activities like she would do with any kiddo not engaging. Usually, her day flew by in a flurry of instruction, answering questions, guiding young minds, laughing at their antics, and trying not to pull her hair out. She adored what she did.
But today, the minute hand on her clock inched forward as though bags of lead had been attached to it to slow time down to a crawl.
As soon as the bell rang, Dylan disappeared before she could talk to him. Probably better that he get a little alone time, and that she wait until she had more information. Beth had somewhere to be, also.
Cindy Paloma from DFPS had agreed to meet her for coffee. She was waiting when Beth opened the door to the coffeehouse on the square—the motherly type who gave great hugs and had a penchant for glittery decorations on her clothes. Usually full of high school students and several folks who Beth knew worked “from home,” she was happy to see Cindy had managed to nab them a small table in the back corner. With the quiet din of voices, but no one sitting too close, they could talk freely.
Beth didn’t even bother to order coffee, instead plopping into the seat opposite Cindy and starting right in. “I want to adopt Dylan, or at least foster him. What are my options?”
Cindy titled her head. “Did you know you’re the second person to talk to me about Dylan today? And three others have called and left messages.”
Three others? “Let me guess, one was Autry Hill?” she asked.
Cindy nodded.
“Are you able to tell me the others?”
“I shouldn’t, but this case seems to be… unusual. I could lose my job, though. So, I did not mention that Cash and Holly Hill called in, so did Will and Rusty, as well as John and Evaline.”
What? The entire Hill clan was jumping in with both feet it sounded like. Beth smiled at that thought. She should’ve known Autry would fight, and his family would support him.
At the same time though, doubts swirled. Beth tugged at her skirt. She’d been so sure that she was the best fit for Dylan. She lived in town close to his school, was an upstanding member of the community, and was financially able to support herself and a child. Sort of. Thanks to a small inheritance when her granddad passed away, she owned her house outright, so that helped. Of course, children from ranches all over the region attended school here, including the Hills and her own family, so if the Hills got custody, Dylan would still attend school in La Colina, not breaking his routine. The Hills had more finances, and there were more of them to share the burden of care.
Positives and negatives on both sides. She had to admit, all the positives would happen if she married Autry. Except the long drive to school. That would suck. And the he didn’t love her thing. That sucked worse. She held onto that as her resolve slipped another notch, then realized Cindy was watching her like a scientist inspecting a fungus she’d never encountered.
Right. Answer her. Say something, dummy.
Beth bit her lip. “Maybe I should talk to the Hills so that we all coordinate what’s best for Dylan?”
“I was hoping you’d say that.” Cindy pulled out a large satchel and dug around in it. “In the meantime,” she said in a muffled voice from inside her bag, “I’ve brought the same informational packet I gave Autry, which has all the details of the application process, the training and assessments you’ll be required to go through, and so forth.”
With numb fingers, Beth reached for the paperwork Cindy handed over. “Do we have enough time to complete everything before the Wrights move in April?”
Cindy gave a slow nod. “It’ll be a close call, and you’ll have to jam in a lot of hours quickly, taking off work or possibly traveling to other regions if the hours aren’t all available here in that time period. However, I think it can be done.”
“And our chances of fostering Dylan?” One step at a time, right? If she could foster him, then adoption was the next step, and possibly easier.
Cindy shook her head. “I can’t give you odds or promises. The system is set up to make sure Dylan is placed with the best possible situation. You and the others interested are all local. That helps a lot, allowing us to keep him in the same school system, reducing the impact to Dylan’s life. But there are other factors we have to assess including the suitability of the home, your ability to provide for the child, and so forth.”
All things she’d assumed would be checked, though the convenience factor had to be a huge bonus. It was not like the system was swimming with options for these lost kiddos. Beth blew out a long breath as she stood up. At least the answer wasn’t an unequivocal no. “Thanks, Cindy. I’ll get started right away.”
“Call if you have problems or questions.”
“I will.”
Cindy tipped her paper cup as though to say good girl. “And talk to the Hills.”
Beth held up her cell phone. “That’s next.”
Only when she stepped outside the coffee shop, her first overwhelming need was to talk to her sisters. She hadn’t called them last night after Autry left, needing to process everything that happened…that proposal… first. Right now, what she needed were hugs and advice. In that order.
Luckily, Kiss N’ Tell was located directly across the square from the coffee shop. The bell over the door tinkled sweetly to announce her arrival, only she stepped into what appeared to be an empty space. No shoppers and no sisters.
“We’ll be right out,” Juliet’s voice called out from somewhere in the back.
Beth stopped inside the door, unable to hold her emotions in a second longer. She dropped her oversized purse full of expository essays from her kiddos and let the tears she’d been holding in just go. Misery and fear and guilt rained down unchecked, drenching her cheeks, neck, and the front of her shirt.
Juliet and Lexi walked out at the same time, expressions of warm greeting firmly in place. The switch from pleasant to shock to concern the second they laid eyes on her would’ve been comical if she hadn’t been in the middle of an all-out wail fest.
“What on earth?” Juliet exclaimed as she hustled over, Lexi right behind her.
“I… I… I…” Beth hiccupped.
“Take a breath, Bethie. Don’t talk yet,” Lexi said.
Her sisters wrapped around her and held on tight, like she’d done this morning with Dylan, and let her sob it all out. Lexi rubbed her back and Juliet ran a hand through her hair, and Beth thought of how Dylan probably hadn’t got this much mothering in most of his young life, and that only set her off on a harder jag of crying.
“Bethie, you’re going to make yourself sick,” Lexi finally said, worry lacing every
syllable.
“Come sit down in the back.” Together, they hustled her to their offices where they pushed her into a chair. Juliet got her a bottle of water, forcing Beth to drink in between the tears. Lexi pulled up other chairs and they sat and waited.
The water helped, and eventually, Beth managed to calm herself. In halting sentences, she went through everything—her relationship with Autry, the situation with Dylan, the proposal for all the wrong and some very right reasons, and her talk with Cindy.
By the time she finished, the tears had finally stopped falling, though they might have dried up entirely given how long she’d cried. That would be fine by Beth. She didn’t want to cry anymore anyway. As her mother always said, tears got nothing done.
“What do I do?” she wailed and dropped her head in to her hands.
“Well…”
She raised her head to find Juliet and Lexi exchanging one of those looks where the two of them managed to communicate with some kind of mental link they’d never shared with Beth. As kids, she’d been secretly jealous of those looks, but they’d never left her out of whatever plans they hatched so these days she didn’t mind.
With serious expressions, they faced her. “We start with hugs. Then chocolate and ice cream. Maybe both,” Juliet said, reaching across to squeeze Beth’s hand.
“And then?”
“Then you suck it up, woman,” Lexi stated in no uncertain terms. “You do what you have to do to make sure Dylan is okay—with you or the Hills is something you’ll figure out.”
“And Autry?”
“You talk to the man. Use those brains, and your teacher ability to get through to anyone, and you talk. Work it out.”
Right. So, basically what she’d already decided, only with hugs and ice cream and chocolate. Those things helped a lot.
Beth took a deep breath, feeling better for the cry and the sisterly support, and pulled back her shoulders. “Good. This is good. Let’s go get that ice cream.”
Without a blink of hesitation, Lexi and Juliet agreed. It took them a few minutes to lock up the shop and put a sign out—a cute clock with a note that they’d be back soon. Beth hated to mess with their business, but this was full-on emergency, and ice cream was required.
Thankfully, the Ice Cream Bucket was empty and didn’t take long. On the way back to the shop with their cones, Lexi stopped dead in her tracks, and Beth had to skid to a halt to avoid getting her pralines ‘n’ cream in her sister’s ponytail. “A little warning, next time.”
Lexi managed to roll her eyes as she turned around. “Look over there.” She took Beth by the chin to turn her head.
It took Beth a moment to scan across the courthouse lawn and several pedestrians wandering around the area before her gaze landed on the person—or people—Lexi had seen.
Autry. Handsome, all dressed up in a suit and tie, enough to steal her breathing, leaving her heart aching. Along with all of his family, he was going into the courthouse with none other than Jason Trask.
“What’s he doing with Jason?” Lexi asked the question.
“It has to be about Dylan,” Beth muttered. Probably seeing how much the arrest and community service might hurt his adoption chances. The arrest would be off his record, but the entire town knew about the fight and the community service.
In an instant, she shoved her ice cream cone in the general vicinity of one of her sisters, who took it, and she started across the street. Lexi and Juliet were right. She needed to talk to Autry, so they weren’t working at cross purposes.
Inside the building, she followed the hushed murmur of several voices, which she assumed had to be the Hills. The burble of noise disappeared behind a door before she caught up with them. Beth hesitated for a moment in the hall outside the door, debating what to do, before finally taking a seat on the uncomfortable wood bench a few doors down.
She’d wait.
*
Jason Trask sat across the table from him, with his parents on one side and Will, Rusty, and Cash on the other. Holly was home with the babies and Sophia. Jennings was in charge of the ranch today. The musty smell of the old courthouse, and the room they were in, only brought back the entire skunking, arrested thing. A situation that had led him back here for even more important reasons.
Jason leaned forward with a closed expression Autry guessed didn’t bode well. “The best I can do is provide the facts when DFPS contacts me.”
The lawyer had been a long-shot move, but one worth taking. “I understand,” Autry said.
Jason nodded. “I’m also willing to vouch for you with them.”
Autry sat back in his seat, eyeing the man with wary hope. “You are?”
Jason grinned. “Don’t act so surprised. I am aware of all the facts of the case. In addition, I’ve dealt with another recent… run in… involving Mr. Fogelman. I also have kept tabs on your community service, and have to admit that, at first, I thought you were rushing to finish faster. However, Beth tells me about the difference she’s seeing in Dylan. I’m impressed.”
Beth tells him? Is she still seeing Jason? Autry beat back the slither of jealousy with a mental two-by-four. This wasn’t about him or what was going on between them, other than the fact that she wanted no part of his plan to adopt Dylan.
He focused on the rest of what the lawyer had to say and had to shake his head, because this had not been what he’d expected. “Thanks.”
“You obviously have developed a good rapport with Dylan. Mrs. Wright, who is far from easy to please, says he’s been a different kid since you started your time with him.”
Mrs. Wright had vouched for him, too?
“I’ve seen you around town, and you’re here now. I can see you care for him,” Jason continued.
“I do.” Autry sat forward, eager to prove that in any way possible.
Jason nodded. “I’m not DFPS, so I can’t vouch for what they will do, but I’ll make sure they have all that information when they talk to me, which I’m sure they will.”
“That’s all I could ask, and I appreciate it.”
“Your two biggest hurdles will be that and your reputation being a bit on the wild side.”
Not much he could do about that, except continue the way he had been since before he’d even made that stupid bet with his dad. Autry nodded. “Anything else?”
Jason grimaced. “It’s my understanding DFPS would prefer to place children with couples when possible…”
“And I’m single,” Autry filled in.
Not for lack of trying. He stuffed the dark swirl of emotion at the thought of Beth’s rejection down deep, because he wasn’t ready to examine it. Women had broken things off before, shot him down before, and nothing came close to the gut-twisting disappointment that had blindsided him the second the word “No” came out of her mouth. But he couldn’t let that draw him down a different path. Keep it with Dylan.
“What if we were to be the ones who applied for the adoption?” his father asked slowly.
Autry whipped his head around to eye them, mouth ajar. He hadn’t been expecting that either. Honestly, he had no clue what he felt about it. His family were the most supportive people in his life, but was this about support? Or having so little faith in him that they were sure he’d never be given custody?
“You?” Jason Trask cocked his head, regarding Autry’s parents.
“Yes.” His mother nodded taking her husband’s hand. “We’re a couple. Solid, upstanding citizens with good reputations. We own a ranch and can support the boy.”
Autry covered his mother’s hand with his and squeezed, even as he forced a lump of unidentifiable emotion back down to his stomach. “I can’t let you do that,” he said. “You’ve already raised your babies. Five of them.”
His dad placed his other hand over Autry’s. “And we’ve never been prouder of one of those babies than we are right now. If we can help, then let us.”
“Age must be a factor though?” Cash broke the moment.
“You’ll have to ask DFPS that,” Jason said.
Cash nodded and turned to face Autry. “Holly and I live in town, and Sophia’s always wanted an older sibling. We were thinking we could—”
“Don’t even say it.” Autry cut him off. “You just had twins. You’ve got your hands full.”
“Actually,” Will interrupted. “Rusty and I were already thinking we might apply to adopt him.”
Autry took a deep breath. Lord, he loved his family—his interfering, have his back at all costs, self-sacrificing family. Even if they didn’t believe he could do this on his own.
“You and Rusty are gone half the year, so that wouldn’t work,” his dad said softly before Autry could point that out.
Autry shook his head trying to cowboy up and not tear up. “I appreciate all of you wanting to fix this for me.” He gave a lopsided grin. “In fact, I’ve never loved y’all more. But something inside me is sure Dylan should be with me. Let’s go with that and see if we can make it happen. Okay?”
He looked to his siblings and then to his parents, stopping at his dad, who gazed back with serious blue eyes for a long second. “This is your call, Son. Just tell us how we can help.”
“Thanks, Dad.” He didn’t think he could ever put into words how much his father’s trust and support meant to him in this moment.
Autry stood and shook Jason’s hand, despite the sinking stones in his gut that told him they hadn’t entirely figured this out yet. The good news was, Trask was willing to act as a reference for the Texas foster care system. That, at least, was a step in the right direction.
He followed his parents out into the hall but had to pull up short when his parents stopped walking. Peeping over his mother’s head to follow their gazes down the hall, Autry stalled out when he spied Beth getting slowly to her feet from where she’d been sitting on a bench, her expression hesitant, except for her determined little chin lifted high. He had to smack his heart back down when it jumped up and started sprinting at the sight of her.
Ignoring his family and the lawyer, Autry walked over, stuffing his hands in his pockets so he couldn’t reach out and touch her. God, she smelled amazing, just her almond-blossom bodywash, but it wrapped around him like coming home.