by India Kells
Ellie McLaren was a dangerous woman as Sam had never felt more vulnerable than while towering over the pixie fairy. He didn’t ponder long on it as Ellie shivered. The spot they were in didn’t keep the cold out, and even if he hated the idea of breaking their connection, the situation couldn’t be helped.
Sam knew to store any fleeting moment of happiness and light, as darkness was his lot, only waiting to take over until it swallowed him whole, until nothing of himself remained. That was the lonely path in front of him, but when it became unbearable, he would now have that moment of paradise with Ellie to treasure in his broken soul.
Chapter Eight
“Nope. No way. It’s out of the question.” Ellie found it easier than she’d expected to face the towering men she barely knew, who obviously scared bad guys for a living, and who’d formed a united front against her. While she’d taken a nap, Lazarus and Sam had decided that sending her away to some sort of retreat nestled in the forest was her only option. Only it wasn’t really a choice, it was an order.
It was quite a rude awakening as she was still surfing the remnants of the quick but memorial mind-blowing sex.
Sam had shown another side of himself; tender, caring, worried as they both dressed in a rush before returning to the apartment. Too bad that tender side of him was quickly replaced by what she supposed was a common trait among the brothers—stern, overbearing, and stubborn. Well, a few weeks ago, she wouldn’t have dared to think of fighting them, but surprisingly, there was a bit of a flame still in her.
Sidestepping Sam, Ellie went to the fridge for a bottle of water.
“You realize we’re doing this for your protection? And where we’re sending you, you won’t lack anything. It’s a fully furnished mansion with the best security around. It’s a bit crowded with people at the moment, but I swear you’ll be safe.”
“Lazarus, thank you for the offer. It’s very generous but I have no intention of accepting it.”
While the tall Brit remained stoic, Sam was almost snarling at her. “Don’t you care about your safety? These aren’t ordinary thugs that are after me. They’ve probably discovered your identity by now, and Jamieson Finch never balks at attacking anyone connected to us.”
“I understand every word you’re saying.”
“So you’ll go tonight?”
Ellie almost smiled at his expression when she shook her head. “Nope. Even worse, I’m going back to my apartment.”
Lazarus walked away with heavy last words. “I’m most certain that’s not the worst that will happen if you do something that stupid.”
The air thickened as she faced Sam alone. While Lazarus had appeared more of a sensible sort, his brother turned feral, standing toe to toe with her, his eyes like hot, melted metal. “Why won’t you listen to the voice of reason?”
It was a good question, and one for which she tried to weave a coherent answer. Ellie must have taken more time than her interrogator liked, because she was pulled out of her thoughts by him putting his large hands on her shoulders. When she looked up, she could see the haunted expression that had been on his face when he’d first opened his door was back before he quickly hid it again.
His voice sounded soft, but his words were made of steel. “You know nothing of my world, or of me. There is no way in hell I’ll drag you into blood, gore, and death, so whatever chivalrous sentiment you’re harboring toward me, get rid of it.”
Ellie felt her breath catch in her chest as he stepped back, breaking their contact, shaken by what he’d said. It sounded so true to her, it made her stop and wonder.
“I also feel like I should apologize. I don’t know what came over me earlier. I shouldn’t have attacked you like that, not when you’re under my protection. In this situation, a quick fuck was the worst possible idea.”
It would’ve been a lie to say Ellie hadn’t had all those silly, girly ideas go through her mind that when he was deep inside her, that in the throes of passion their hearts would synch and suddenly there’d be a connection that ran deeper than those phone calls. Life had taught her otherwise. However, for her at least, what had happened wasn’t wrong, or dirty, and shouldn’t be sullied by such words, even if to the outside world, it would indeed appear as nothing more than a simple fuck.
“You don’t have to be insulting, Sam. I’m not trying to tie you down. We can forget what happened earlier like you said. I’m not talking about love, but there is a connection between us. I don’t know how to describe it, but for lack of better words, we need each other.”
Even if it rang true, her statement appeared to push him even further into the darkness.
“Dialing a wrong number isn’t a true connection. It was an accident.”
His response was a clear sign that he was showing her the door. Every cell inside her was ready for battle, but what could she battle? Even if she couldn’t take his salvation into her hands, Ellie needed to do something, to act and reach out.
With that barely disguised order, her training and experience alerted her that it was time to step back before it got completely out of hand. “No need to make excuses, Sam. You want me to leave, I’ll leave.”
Ellie pushed away her unease and focused on making sure she got everything in her bag when Sam blocked her exit. “No way you’re going out there on your own. Lazarus will send you to...”
She stopped him right then and there. “You don’t want me by your side. So I release you from any responsibility you feel toward me. You think I’m a damsel in distress, but I can survive in this city. I know where to go to stay safe.”
Sam hesitated, but Ellie didn’t want to wait for more empty words. After all, she had indicated to Lazarus that she wouldn’t bear the responsibility of Sam upon her shoulders, even if it went against every fiber of her being, or the way she’d led her life up until then. As she walked away from the man, the fire inside that had kept her warm for the first time in a long time, started to fade.
As she searched for the door, Ellie heard Sam behind her, along with Lazarus’ voice, but she kept going and grabbed her coat. She remembered the way to the garage, and there had to be an exit there.
Shouts and running footsteps behind her didn’t slow her down. It took a moment until she got her bearings after recognizing Sam’s stolen car in the garage. Ellie was about to tell the two men running after her to get lost, when her world turned into a storm of fire and hail. The sound was a crescendo of pain vibrating inside her head to the point where her legs gave out.
Arms over her head, her body being battered from falling pieces from the sky, her ears ringing, Ellie’s eyes filled with tears. It was like suddenly being disconnected from the world, a preview of what being at death’s door was like.
As if from a great distance, she could hear voices, but she couldn’t discern what was being said. Arms grabbed her, and pain exploded in her head the moment she was moved. Nausea fighting with agony, Ellie tried to get her bearings, but it was impossible to make her brain work.
Feeling like a rag doll, she floated in and out of consciousness until her world went dark for good.
Or did it? Even without her vision, it was as if her body never ceased moving. Her ears were only buzzing now, although it sounded like a cat was purring full throttle right inside her skull.
Where was Sam? If only she could shake off the cotton that had filled her head and make her body respond to simple commands.
Like a boat floating in the middle of the sea, she lost track of time. She stayed that way until a dim light from behind her closed eyelid acted like the necessary switch for her brain to function again.
One blink, and then another, and Ellie realized that the glow was coming from under a door. When she dared to move by rolling onto her back, she discovered her body was sore but not as bad as she’d anticipated.
What had happened? As she slowly stretched each of her limbs, testing for injuries, her mind tried to make sense of what had happened. An explosion. It was the only thing that c
ould’ve happened. Was it from a gas leak?
Sitting on the bed, she looked around, and with the faint illumination saw she was in a comfortable room, but not one she had seen at Lazarus’s.
Just as she was about to test her legs, the door opened, the now stark light blinding her poor eyes for an instant. When she could see again, it wasn’t Sam or Lazarus before her, but a man she’d never seen, and seeing the gleam in his eyes, as well as the two men flanking him, Ellie knew she wasn’t in Kansas anymore, and nobody would come to rescue her.
Chapter Nine
It was so weird how the brain worked sometimes. Ellie had heard of people fainting in the face of danger, others cried, and many begged to have their life spared. It seemed she was in another category—those who waited to see what would happen next. It wasn’t freezing in the face of danger, or not feeling anything because she was scared as hell, but more as if her entire being was waiting for more information before deciding which reaction to have.
“I see you’re awake.”
His voice was low, controlled, just like the man himself appeared to be. He was tall, and she guessed well in his sixties, but he wasn’t one of those people who became softer with age. Handsome face, lean and muscled, his body reflected the need for control she guessed he required. In a suit, the stranger wanted to make a statement. However, even though it was spotlessly clean, it had seen better days. Hair stylishly swept back, it was a soft gray, one that overtook the color of his beard too. It needed a trim. Was he a man who didn’t have the time to take care of that, or one who was on the run? It was when she finally locked gazes with him and fell into the swirling silvery irises she knew so well, she realized who was standing before her. Sam and Lazarus’ father. Jamieson Finch.
“With the amount of blood from your head injury, I didn’t think you’d survive the ride. Too bad you were standing so close to the detonation. It was unexpected.”
It was only when he mentioned the blast that she noticed the throbbing in her head. When she reached for her temple, her fingers trembled, but she didn’t acknowledge it.
“We wiped away the blood. I hate the stench of it as it dries and even if this place has its share of stains, I didn’t see why we should add more.”
The snark in his comment told her he wasn’t happy to be in this situation, that it was beneath his station.
“Why am I here?”
Eyes as sharp as blades returned to her, but he smiled. “Your first question isn’t to ask who I am. I see my sons have already told you. I would say that’s good, but as we won’t be together for long, I doubt that piece of information will be of any use to you.”
When she’d thought about ending her life, Ellie hadn’t felt any emotion about it, but now that someone wanted to do it for her, anger made her want to launch herself at him. “You have no right to keep me as your prisoner.”
“Ms. McLaren, I’ve ignored the law for so long, I won’t start complying with it now.”
One of the men behind him lowered his head, a smirk on his mouth, but Ellie knew she couldn’t be distracted from the main threat. “How do you know my name?”
“Is that really important? Just know that I keep tabs on everything and everyone that may be of interest concerning my sons.”
“Of interest or are you more interested in finding something you can use against them?” It wasn’t like her to be so direct, but if it kept her from succumbing to fear, she wasn’t against it.
“Ah! Sam has already gained your loyalty and in such a short span of time. I find it remarkable. You see, apart from his brothers, he hasn’t forged relationships with other people for a long time. I think it’s a shame that he’s started now.”
Ellie frowned at this strange revelation but stopped soon as it made her forehead hurt. “A shame?”
“Well, you see, I’ve always had a special relationship with Sam. One that centers around who I want him to become, and I wouldn’t like to see anyone steering him away from that path.”
“What?” More questions wanted to stumble out of her mouth, but she only managed the single word.
For the longest time, Finch observed her. She worried he’d grown tired of answering her questions when he flicked his wrist, and the two goons stepped out of the room, closing the door behind them. Ellie didn’t know if she should feel relieved or scared to death.
“Sam is a tortured soul. You must have realized that by now. He has been all his life.”
A slow tide of indignation and fury started to rise within her as he spoke. “Could it be because his father is a psychopath?” She couldn’t believe she uttered those words to his face but didn’t regret saying them.
Such an insult could have warranted her a hit, but Finch only smiled. “Oh, I admire people who hold dear to their ideals, but let me remind you that Sam is half a psychopath. I would think about that if you survive long enough, of course.”
Finch walked around her small enclosure, touching the curtains with disgust. “Society sees good and bad in very stark and definite ways. I think the human beast is much more complex. In a pack, they fuck their same gender and are not labeled as gay. They kill and are not tagged as murderers. They experience life and live it, following their instincts and desires which humans tend to forget how to do. All that animalistic fight has gone from them, and as soon someone wants to get to the top of the food chain, they fear them.”
“So that’s what turns you on, power and killing?”
“Oh, Ms. McLaren, my desires and goals are much darker.” The silver of his eyes bubbled into a dark shade of charcoal she’d never seen in her life as he approached her. Her heart thumping with anticipation, Ellie was afraid, and apprehension of what was to come closed her throat as she tried to remain still.
Now toe to toe with her, Finch towered over her. His face descended so close to hers she almost thought he’d kiss her. “In my sons, I see a little bit of myself. Until he turned against me, Lazarus was my heir apparent, but Sam...”
This close, she felt him shiver, an expression close to contentment showing on his face. “Sam was everything a father could desire. What I always wanted. And so I took him.”
In the course of her career as an emergency operator, Ellie had heard screams of pain, stories of violence, pleas for help, all the atrocities this city could ever spew, and was convinced her soul had wrapped around each of them to better offer her help. It was the victims she sided with, but at this very instant, she was on the other end of the spectrum, and was fighting hard to understand what his words implied. “Took him?”
Finch looked down at her with such a smile, one a father would give to a foolish child. “I didn’t have a real interest in my children before the age of reason, and seldom returned, but I had an opportunity to check on Sam. When I saw him, so young and innocent, part of me flooding his veins and his mind, the animal in me wanted him. Over and over again.”
The whisper in her ear, the revelation he was sharing with her turned her into a complete mess. Her stomach wanted to revolt, her hands to tear at the monster until he was no more, but Ellie remained unmoving, like a puppet with cut strings.
“I knew that if I broke him, I could make him become like me. If spilled inside him enough times to erase what his beautiful but silly mother had instilled in him, I’d make him see what I see. Follow in my footsteps in a way none of his brothers would ever be capable of. I almost succeeded, but his mother found out and made him disappear. For the longest time, he was under my radar, until he joined the Army. I didn’t act at that time. Structure is always good for a man, and I approved. I followed him from afar, waiting for the right moment. I’ve been distracted by my other, stupid offspring over the last few years, but maybe it was a blessing. They’ve stripped me of all the artifice I’d adorned over the years. I’d put aside the animal in me, but I think it’s time it returns. Only the animal will allow me to kill my runts and turn Sam to me again. He’s the only one who has ever encountered the beast in me, who can understa
nd it, and that’s why he’ll return to my side.”
The mix of sensible fatherly thoughts and monstrous insanity coming from Finch made Ellie want to block her ears to stop the flow, but she had to hear it out. Sam had lived with that secret burden all his life, and she understood a little better now why that shadow of pain followed him. If anything, she had to bear witness, for Sam. “I doubt he’d allow you to rape him again.”
Booming laughter was his immediate answer. “He’s too old for my tastes now. And his returning to me would indeed require a lot of work and reconditioning, but I have no doubt I could make him see the light.” Mirth vanished and intensity returned when his hand touched her neck, making her skin crawl with disgust. “I find my pleasures elsewhere now, child. They are wide and varied.”
Close to spitting in his face, his large hand closed around Ellie’s neck and pushed until she stumbled back a few feet and ended up against the wall. With his fingers tightening around her windpipe, Ellie started to thrash, trying to free herself, but she couldn’t get in a good enough hit as he was all but plastered against her body, his disgusting breath fanning her face. “Did you know that you can find intense pleasure in suffocating your lover? I think I may experience it with you, try to explore what Sam finds so interesting about you.”
Gasping for air, Ellie wiggled as panic seized her.
“Or maybe I could use you to turn Sam.”
With what little breath she had, she wheezed at him, “He’d hate you even more. Kill you.”
The fingers slacked just enough that she could draw a full breath.
“But I want him to hate me. The line between love and hate is so thin, my dear. I could work that line until my dear son is brought over it without even knowing.” His hand left her, and he stepped back, the cloak of civility back in place, but this time, Ellie knew better.
As he stepped toward the door, he turned one last time. “My intention was to kill you right now, actually. But I see that it will be more valuable to spare you. I’m curious to taste what Sam likes. It is unexpected, but I’m starting to think you’ll be an interesting tool to use. Over and over again.”