by J. L. Weil
With the words my fight died.
Our chests rose and fell sharply as I stepped closer, with both distress and something else. Something wild that filtered into our cells, taking hold of us since we first saw each other at the club. It felt almost like a bolt of electricity had struck both of us the moment we first kissed, somehow connecting us. Its current was strong and untamable, remaining inside us.
It came to life every time I was near her, making our sudden bond bolder, and pulling us together.
Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to focus. “We brought in the witch today, but we still failed. We failed because we didn’t bring her back unharmed, because we couldn’t work together for a second. I failed because I can’t seem to help you understand that I’m not here to diminish who you are, or what you have accomplished… what you have survived. I am here to help you.”
“I don’t need anyone’s help, and I had to do something. Your plan of talking her to death wasn’t working.”
I shook my head, taking another step toward her, but something in her words sounded off, cryptic… There was something she wasn’t saying.
“It wasn’t about the words; it was about helping her realize that she does have control over the abilities she possesses. That her true power is her unbreakable will, not her magic, and that is how she’ll learn to wield it. I’ve been as close as I am to you from men with bomb vests strapped to their chests, and I’ve talked them out of pressing the trigger. I was trained for this. I may not have mystical gifts like you, Renna, but they chose me for a reason...”
“And suddenly you’re an expert about magic?” she retorted, half offended, half affected by my presence near her. “I didn’t hit her to harm her, I did it to protect y—” she stopped herself, lips thinning. “I stopped her from harming herself. She wouldn’t have been able to stabilize her powers. She could have hurt… someone.”
My gaze searched her eyes; taken by the words she didn’t allow herself to say. “You knocked her out to protect me…” I took the last step, standing before her. “…Because you feel it too,” I whispered, certain and honestly relieved. “You feel this insane attraction between us—"
“You know nothing about me,” she snapped.
I sighed. “That should be true, but it isn’t. You and I are far more similar than you realize, Renna. I may have grown up with a white picket fence and loving parents, but my childhood was far from perfect. I’ve spent my whole life trying to live up to others' expectations of me, proving myself, and feeling like nothing I ever did was enough. Like I wasn’t enough. I too built a wall around me. I became self-sufficient, because it was easier to pretend that I didn’t need anything or anyone, other than myself.”
She blinked, startled by my words as though I’d hit a note in her, and I sensed I had, but Renna fisted her hands and lifted her chin stubbornly, not allowing herself to admit it. Painfully aware of how wrong this could go, I closed the remaining space between us, leaving merely a breath.
My hand sought her cheek, fingertips tracing her jaw tenderly, and the moment I touched her, lighting struck once more inside of us. I saw it in her eyes, and she shuddered. Love at first sight didn’t exist, but absolute attraction at first sight? That shit was real. It was implacable, all consuming, and life changing. Like opposite magnets instantly pulled together, slamming against each other regardless of their origin, and unable to come apart without crashing together again.
It was allure, need, magnetism, passion and obsession all at once. That’s what I felt with her every single fucking time, and as her head tilted up for me, with my touch, I knew she felt it too.
“The thing is, Renna, you shattered that wall the first time I saw you. When we fought the Spider Queen together. You are strong willed, relentless, impetuous and a force to be reckoned with, which is why they chose you, and the very reason you drive me crazy. I grew up surrounded by women who bend to the will of men, but I don’t want to undermine you. I don’t want you to submit, because that fire in you is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. It makes you brighter than a thousand suns, and it calls to the fire living inside me.”
Something akin to emotion flashed in her piercing blue eyes with my confession, like she was susceptible to me, as though I too was breaking through her walls. Pulling her waist to me, I shuddered as her ragged breaths fanned my chest, and my hand slipped around her neck, tipping her head up, ready to claim her lips.
“If you kiss me again without my permission, you’ll find yourself incapable of having children, because I’m going to ram my knee into your groin so hard…” she forced the words out, reclaiming her composure, but she didn’t step away, she couldn’t, and something in her eyes still screamed at me to kiss her.
A slow grin curved my lips. “And here I thought you were dying for me to steal another kiss. I guess I read you wrong. Don’t worry, I promise you that next time, you’ll be the one to kiss me.”
That did it.
Her hands slammed against my bare chest when she pushed me off her, causing me to stagger back a few feet. “Well, get ready for disappointment, Ethan.”
The walls shook as she slammed the door behind her, and I forked a hand through my hair, a ragged exhale escaping my lips.
Damn, that woman drove me wild.
Stepping out of the shower, I pulled on a pair of boxers from the drawer, and sat on my bed. My gaze traveled to the starry sky on the other side of the window—it was like I was staring straight into the galaxy.
Renna still invaded my thoughts, letting me think of nothing else but her. Her resilience, the pain I knew she’d been through, and the path placed in front of us.
Reaching for the desk, I pulled out the stack of multicolored paper I’d found before, taking a purple sheet this time, and lounged back on the bed as my fingers began to fold away.
Scenes from that day, from our mission, returned, and I couldn’t help but wonder what I could have done differently for her to accept my presence here, and feel more comfortable with me. Perhaps that was the problem, that Renna wanted much more from me than what we were supposed to be.
I was no gigolo, but if my experience with women had taught me something, it was how to recognize when a woman wanted me more than she believed she should... or she allowed herself to admit. No matter how much Renna fought, ignored, or pushed me away, the way she gave into me every time I came close said it all. The way she melted against my body with every kiss I stole from her, was nothing short of a miracle.
Yet, I wanted her.
So bad, it hurt.
So bad, I could hardly breathe until I had her in my arms again.
Placing the paper crane on the windowsill, I folded my arms behind my head, not even bothering to lay under the sheets. Eyes closing, the image of her enticing lips and those daring eyes replaced my reality. Yeah, my life had consisted of proving myself to others, and now she was forcing me to do it again, but I had surpassed every single test, and I was up to her challenge.
Renna would be mine, no matter what I had to do to make her understand that she wanted me too.
RENNA
Who did he think he was, lecturing me? As if I didn’t get enough of those from Ambrose or the other professors at the academy. I could work with a team and had done so for months. My friends and I, we were a team. I never could have pulled off half the shit I did without them. Who was he to say I didn’t understand how a team worked?
Truth be told, I was the one used to leading, making decisions, and taking on the responsibility when shit hit the fan, which it normally did. I would, in a heartbeat, take the blame for any of my friends, and they were, after all, my ideas to begin with.
Some of what he said resonated within me, regardless that I didn’t want to admit it. With the threat of Infernum becoming increasingly real, we didn’t have the luxury to fight over who called the shots. It was beginning to sink in that the Aereum hadn’t chosen me to lead, for whatever reason, and it sucked.
I’d be lying
if I said it didn’t hurt my pride. They barked orders, demanded discipline, and taught us to be ruthless, skilled, and stealthy.
And still, it hadn’t been enough.
Wandering the halls, I let myself work through all the feelings nagging inside me, recounting the events of the night. The academy was otherwise quiet and empty, most of the students in their rooms, just a few late-night burners hitting the books or practicing in the training room.
I could hear most of what went on in the school, the laughter behind closed doors, the clanging of weapons as two students sparred, and the rushing of the waterfalls outside the castle walls. The key was tuning out the sounds I didn’t want to hear. It could be a tangled mess when you factored in my own thoughts and feelings. I could easily get lost in it all, but my sanity was already questionable on a good day.
When I had a bad day, the darkness was harder to keep at bay, scrambling the light within that kept me grounded.
If Scorpion and I had met under different circumstances, perhaps the jealousy and anger I was feeling wouldn’t have conflicted with the other emotions he enticed within me. I didn’t know how to process the irrational attraction I felt for him. A human and me? It didn’t make sense. On the other hand, it was all that made sense.
Confusing as hell was what it was.
His enticing voice returned to me… “You shattered my wall the first time I saw you…” My chest tightened in response, my natural instinct wanting to let him in. Over my dead body. He did have a way with words though.
Sighing, I pushed on. I didn’t know where I was headed, not until I found myself staring at an intricate door decorated with a latticework of vines like something designed by a fae. Tucked into the door was an ornate gold knob that seemed forged at the beginning of time, with swirls and the head of a lion in the center, a hoop in its mouth. Nothing about the academy was normal, not even the infirmary.
Is this a good idea?
Probably not. I should be in my room. But I wouldn’t be able to sleep, not until I did this.
Despite of how my personality might be perceived, I did care about others. I was just selective on those I let close to me. My inner circle was small, and I planned to keep it that way... And yet, here I was.
I snuck into the infirmary, soundlessly pushing the door shut behind me. The air was cooler in this section of the castle, and the strong scent of special oils permeated the air. Lavender. Mint. Sage… along with others I couldn’t identify. As one could imagine in an academy that trained supernatural slayers, people got hurt. A lot. Nurse Sena was used to seeing me and probably wouldn’t have questioned my presence, but I thought it would be better if I entered undetected.
Thank you, vampire speed.
Unlike normal hospital wings, the room wasn’t a ghastly white, but donned walls the color of the ocean at high noon. Ivory curtains divided up the room like foamy waves, and in one of those sections was Catina—I had tracked her scent through the castle.
From the other side of the infirmary, the sound of a stir stick swirling against a glass jar echoed toward me. Sena was mixing a potion. I tiptoed to the third partition and slipped behind the curtain.
Catina was sitting up on a twin bed, with Zero snuggled up against her thigh as she stroked his head. The cat’s loud purring reverberated in my ears, like nails on a chalkboard, but stopped when it’s glowing yellow eyes landed on me. He let out a low warning growl, alerting Catina to my presence, and her back stiffened. I took a step closer, my eyes skimming over her face as relief washed over my chest. She had no marks or bruises, no lasting effects from my punch.
“What are you doing here?” she seethed. There was a molten fire in her eyes, and I couldn’t blame her, not after what I’d done or how I’d treated her.
In truth, if you took the cat out of the equation, I was intrigued by her, curious about her life, about how her powers had been suppressed. The Aereum implied she was important, and I wanted to know why.
Why me? Why Scorpion? Why her? And who else?
Questions really bothered me. I’d like to know what I was dealing with before getting into bed with them, figuratively speaking, not literally. Although, getting into bed with Scorpion did have its own appeal. Totally off topic, and my mind really needed to stop derailing.
Transferring my weight to one side, I tried not to fidget. “Checking on you. How are you feeling? No permanent damage? Like, I didn’t actually knock you dumb?” The light and even tone in my voice surprised me.
“I’m fine, unless you are here to hit me again,” she countered, gray eyes large with a look I knew all too well. It was exactly how I looked the first time Ambrose brought me here.
I snorted, my lips tipping up. “Depends, are you going to try to zap me with a blast of radioactive magic again?” And just like that, I was feeling more like myself, and less like an abuser. No. I was never that. Bitchy. Definitely. But never a bully.
“I should, as payback for knocking me out.”
“I can be a little impulsive and intense.”
“So I’ve noticed.”
She fumbled with the soft silvery sheet on the bed, her other hand soothing a ruffled Zero. The cat never took his slitted eyes off me, and I was pretty sure if I made any sudden movements, he would scratch my eyeballs out... and eat them. He seemed that kind of protective and twisted.
“What’s your deal with cats?” Catina added, noticing how my gaze kept straying to Zero.
“I’m allergic,” I answered.
“Oh. I didn’t think, uh, vampires were prone to such things,” she admitted.
“It’s pretty wild, right? Vampires, witches, fae, shifters. The list of impossible goes on, and yet here we are.”
“How long have you been a, you know, vampire?” A hint of awkwardness fumbled into her voice.
I sat at the end of the bed, pulling up one of my legs, letting the other dangle over the side. Zero watched me intently, but shocked us both by only doing that, watching. “Two years,” I replied. “I’ve been at the academy since.”
Her back rested against two pillows propped on the wall. “That’s it? You seem so... sure of yourself,” she finally admitted. “What’s the deal with this place? It isn’t really a secret lab where they experiment on humans, playing it off as oh-you’re-actually-a-witch-didn’t-you-know?”
I laughed. “At least you have an imagination.”
Her perky nose scrunched. “Is that important?”
My shoulders lifted in a slight shrug. “To me. I’d hate for you to be dull.”
“Thanks... I guess.” She frowned. “You strike me as someone whose life is never boring.” Catina toyed with a thread on the sheet. “I keep waiting to wake up,” she added softly.
My mouth tightened. “I get the feeling, but if you give this place a chance, it will become a home.”
Her eyes brightened at the word, just as I thought they might. One thing about runaways, we all had something in common. We wanted a place to belong, a place to call home. I saw that in her, just as it had once been in me.
“Aren’t vampires supposed to be like blood crazed? Why aren’t you ripping out my throat or something?”
Leaning back on my hands, I gave her a mischievous grin. “I’m not your typical vampire, so I’m told. My control over the bloodlust sets me apart from all others. I don’t know why.”
“Just like I don’t know how to be a witch,” she murmured, drawing a connection between us that I didn’t even understand.
“It’s still freaking you out, isn’t it?”
She nodded, but there was a little less fear beaming in her eyes. “Yeah, but I’m pretty sure the nurse laced my tea.”
I chuckled. “Got any left? I could use a little something to help me sleep.”
Catina’s pink lips slipped into a small smile. “You might not be as bad as I thought.”
“Oh, no. I definitely am, don’t let this fool you. I’m tired and not thinking clearly, obviously.”
A gentle a
nd calm lull lapped between us before she spoke again. “So, what’s with you and the hunk?”
My body stiffened at the mention of Scorpion, the human I was trying to avoid thinking about so desperately. Don’t bite her head off. I sighed. “Apparently, he’s my partner.”
“Do you always kiss your partners?”
“Do you always meddle into other people’s lives?” I snarled.
She sat up, something like excitement dancing in her features. “Yep. I’d love to read your cards.” Her eyes drifted to the floral, knitted bag sitting on the little side table.
“Get in line. My friend, Tricksy’s been trying to read me for two years.”
“Renna?” A stern voice tipped with surprise called, making my head whip toward the curtain opening. It was Nurse Sena. “Shouldn’t you be in the dorms? It’s late.” A frown carved her blue lips, that were only shades lighter than her hair. Sena was a fae with a healing affinity. A robust woman, a few inches shorter than me, and pointed ears that peeked from between her hair.
A long pause stretched as I scrambled for a good excuse. “I came to check on our new witch,” I replied, with a false bright smile.
“Hmm,” Nurse Sena pursed. “Since you’re here, it saves me the trouble of having to send for one of the witch residents. You can show Ms. Whitlow to her room, I know how familiar you are with the particular wing.”
Nurse Sena gave me Catina’s room number, located in the witches’ level of the dorms with instructions for Catina to rest. Tomorrow she would get a formal tour, as well as a class schedule to fit her supernatural needs.
“You’re one of us now,” I said, looping an arm around her shoulders as she stood. “But the cat...” I shuddered, shifting my gaze to Zero who watched me with narrowed eyes, still perched on the bed.