My whole body tensed as I waited for Joel’s response. Strong emotions threatened to fill my chest, and I fought them, desperately trying to exude only calm.
After what seemed like an eternity a small but alluring chuckle came from him. ‘Yes losing one’s wings can be bothersome. I have been there myself. Unlike you though I have no talent for feigned humility. So, I had to find…other ways to procure some.’
Suddenly his outline distorted and large, black wings flicked outwards. I inhaled sharply not daring to imagine how he had acquired them. I clenched my hands together till they hurt. ‘I was hoping you could help me find a way to not lose them again,’ I said. ‘I fear in the near future they may not be so easily fooled.’
His wings settled. ‘Exactly what is it you plan to do, that would…upset them so much?’
I felt his surge of anticipation, and I embraced the moment. ‘I want what you have. I want to be free of them. I’m sick of their vague advice and promises of happiness. They are weak slaves to an unseen god that I do not know. I have seen your power. I know it is real, and that is what I want.’
The room went dangerously quiet. ‘Very well,’ he finally replied. ‘If you are prepared to give yourself to me, I will reward you.’
‘Will you give me power over humans?’
‘If that is what you what.’
A strange giddiness filled my head. ‘I want it all,’ I persisted.
He laughed lightly; the sound was inspiring. ‘My, you are impatient. Come closer, we will discuss it.’
My body ached to go to him, and I could feel myself losing control. I had to leave soon. ‘I do not want to discuss it in this place. I don’t trust the ones who attend you. Two of your dark ones have already caused me much trouble.’
‘Really?’ he said with disingenuous surprise. ‘And what were their names?’
‘Aydin and Samuel.’
‘And where are they now?’
‘In a place where they can not bother me anymore.’
He laughed loudly, clapping his hands. ‘So that’s where they got to. Tell me, how did you escape them?’
I shifted, preparing to transform. ‘Aydin I recognized from my past. I hoped to make an ally of him, but he was weak. He couldn’t see past the immediate reward of destroying me, so I had to act first. Samuel was harder, much more self-control. I had to comply till he believed I would return to you. His confidence was his downfall. Appearing harmless can sometimes be an asset.’
‘How delightful. I would love to hear the details of how you defeated them.’ Joel said provocatively.
‘And I would love to tell you, but on one condition.’
‘And what would that be?’
‘I want them both when they return to you. They caused me much…inconvenience.’
His wings rustled. ‘I’m sure we can make arrangements. Now please, come, you will be safe I promise.’
‘Not here,’ I said firmly.
Frustration deepened his voice. ‘Then where?’
‘I want to go where they cannot find us. Meet me tomorrow at the Church of All Souls near Youlgreave, England. If I sense anyone with you, I will leave and find another leader.’
He huffed, and the air cooled. ‘You expect me to travel to the other side of the world. How foolish do you think I am? How do I know it’s not a trick?’
‘You don’t,’ I breathed. ‘Maybe I plan to take you too.’
I could feel his agitation; silence filled the void. I waited patiently for his next move. Suddenly he leaped with incomprehensible speed, but I transformed before he could reach me. He couldn’t restrain me now. He stood where I’d just been with his back to me, anger emphasized each rise and fall of his shoulders. I stared at the back of his head waiting for him to turn. I had to see him before I left—it was the final part of my preparation.
Sensing I was still there, he pulled up to his full height. He twisted, and his face came into view—if I’d been human, I doubt I’d have remained standing. He was the most incredible thing I’d ever seen; his form shamed every object in the room. His skin resembled carved marble, like a perfect sculpture brought to life. A touch of pink colored his cheeks and his face held perfect symmetry. His eyes were the color of tropical water shimmering in the sunlight, framed by thick, dark lashes. Soft caramel hair draped to a strong chin, and his pouting, red lips wore a confident smile. There were too many colors, and too much perfection, but it worked. But it was more than just the physical that drew me to this creature; there was an illusion of kindness, it made me trust him, want to be with him. He looked incapable of harming anyone; it was the angel in him, combining aesthetics with a heavenly appeal.
He closed his eyes and breathed in my desire; it was almost too much. I wanted to change back, to stand before him adored by those magnetic eyes. The pull increased, and I felt myself slipping, but then I noticed the jet-black wings twitching behind him. I focused on them; they reminded me of who he really was. It worked, the desire slowly subsided overshadowed by the reality of his demonic wings. I had my weapon, something I could shield myself with. Finally, I could leave.
His angelic smile failed as I began to drift away. ‘You will be back,’ he snarled.
I gave him nothing in return.
Fleeing as fast as I could I didn’t slow until I reached the city edge. With the artificial lights fading I decided to face the emotions I’d smothered. I needed to deal with the guilt and fear before I reached Aydin—these were not things I wanted to share.
I began with my fears. What if Joel didn’t come? And if he did would he come alone? The timeline I’d set would make it difficult for any of the dark ones to join him, but would he find local dark ones to assist him? Part of me was confident he wouldn’t. Surely all the dark ones that far away would belong to a different leader, but then again, did Joel have dark ones all over the world? Or did leaders work together? I cursed myself for not knowing more. The fear flared again, it would just have to run its course.
The guilt was a much bigger issue. Aydin was right, Joel was dangerously alluring, and I was glad I saw him. The initial shock of his physical appearance was over, I just had to remember to concentrate on his wings. But seeing him was different to touching him, and I was worried by how my human body might react when that happened. Even now, halfway back to Aydin, part of me still screamed to return to him. He was lust in its purest form, one of the seven deadly sins and tomorrow, if I couldn’t contain myself, it could prove fatal for both of us.
Chapter 25
We were up before sunrise preparing for Joel’s possible arrival. Aydin had been asleep when I’d returned, and we’d barely spoken all morning. He had already cleared the furniture, so most of the hard work was done. There was only one more thing that I wanted to do, but I needed Aydin’s help. It took me a while to find the courage to ask, as I knew it would upset him. ‘Aydin there is something I…need from you,’ I finally whispered.
He looked at me with one eyebrow raised. ‘Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like this?’
I sucked in my lips. ‘I want to practice taking the sword from my wings, but…I want you to hold me while I do it.’
His face darkened. ‘You mean the way Joel will.’ I nodded. His chin lifted. ‘Fine,’ he replied, but his eyes said differently.
He waited patiently for me to attach the sword. When I finished, he stepped forward awkwardly wrapping his arms around my chest. The way he held me felt wrong, like a total stranger. Tears threatened, and I wanted to stop.
Inhaling heavily, I wrapped one arm around him determined to do this. Instantly I realized this would be harder than I thought. Joel would feel everything I did. A twinge of panic quickened my heart. I would have to distract him, and like it or not, my best option would be to do this with a kiss.
My body ached as a cold jolt ran through my limbs. I held Aydin tighter terrified by how he would react. I had no other choice; I needed to know if this would work, otherwise I could never face Joel.
Summoning all my strength, I pressed my lips to his hot neck. I breathed in his warmth, tasting the smooth skin. The pulse of his throat beat under my lips. Gradually I moved to his jaw waiting for some response.
At first he gave me nothing then his arms tightened, and his head shifted. The corner of his mouth found my lips, and he cautiously returned my kiss. I struggled to stay focused as the tip of his tongue teased my mouth. Intense frustration echoed in his embrace, and his kiss strengthened. I had to act before I completely lost myself.
Sliding my hand up his arm I carefully reached for the sword. It succumbed to the slight pressure, slipping into my fingers. Maintaining slow, steady movements, I pulled it free wrapping my arm around his neck. The tip teetered millimeters from his throat.
Suddenly he pulled back. ‘I can’t Callie. I’m sorry.’ He caught sight of the sword, and his face fell. ‘You did it. I had no idea. So, this is how you will do it. With a kiss?’
The look on his face left me feeling sick. ‘I’m sorry, I wish there were another way.’
His expression shifted to anger. ‘How do you expect me to watch that? I won’t be able to stop myself.’
‘You have to. You saw how quickly I got the sword. It will happen fast. You have to stay hidden.’
‘If he does anything to hurt you…’
‘Then you will be there to help.’
Rage thinned his lips. ‘I’m sorry. I can’t.’
My own anger surged. ‘And I can’t do this on my own.’ I threw the sword to the ground. I looked at the strong muscles of his neck and forearms—I felt so small; so weak beside him. This was exactly how I’d feel next to Joel, except even more so. I wanted to know how strong Joel really was, and I needed Aydin to show me.
‘I want you to restrain me.’
The fury drained leaving him pale. ‘What? No. That’s not a good idea.’
I stepped forward holding his gaze. ‘If Joel really is stronger than you, I need to be ready.’
‘I won’t do this.’
‘Show me.’
He scowled and stepped back. ‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ But nothing could stop me now, I couldn’t even feel my body anymore. Reaching up, I pushed him firmly. He stumbled. ‘Stop. That’s enough.’
I barely heard him. Everything I’d been holding back, the anger, the hurt, the fear—it all exploded. Visions of Samuel and Joel filled my head, and without thinking I flew, driving him into the wall. Strong hands enclosed my shoulders, and he spun me around, forcing my back against the cold stone. His forearm pushed into my chest, and I grabbed him, trying to wrestle his arm away. He held me with hardly any effort, his face was cold and my rage quickly dissolved, diluted by the reality of what I was about to face.
Panting heavily, I looked at Aydin, bewildered. His eyes dropped to my lips. He grabbed my wrists and with one swift motion, he brought them up, pressing them either side of my head. He pushed his body against mine making it hard to breathe. His expression was a mix of anger, desire, and pain. I fought to move, but it was useless, a small cry betrayed my desperation.
‘Now do you see why I’m so scared for you?’ he said.
I froze, something flickered in the depths of his piercing black eyes. He crushed his lips to mine, kissing me roughly. My body responded hungrily, and I fought, wanting to touch him, but his hands only tightened. I was entirely at his mercy. His hipbones pressed into my stomach, and he bit my bottom lip. I tasted blood as desire churned in my pelvis. I thrust my tongue into his mouth, and he groaned, pushing harder against me. Unable to inhale, I couldn’t tell him the pressure was too much. His kiss didn’t ease, and I became dizzy. My chest burned for oxygen and my legs felt numb. I turned my head, taking a painful gasp of air.
‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered stepping back, letting my hands fall.
‘You did nothing wrong,’ I said reaching for him. He turned away. I leaned against the wall, my legs were shaking and it took a moment to regain my composure. ‘Aydin, you need to see one last thing,’ I said, once I could stand on my own again.
He looked over his shoulder. ‘What now?’
‘You need to see what I’ll look like.’
‘What are you talking about?’ he asked turning.
‘When I saw Joel, I…changed how I looked.’
‘Why?’
I wasn’t sure how to answer this. Tasting my bottom lip, I could still feel the imprint of his kiss. ‘Because this body is yours.’
His eyes dulled and he sighed. ‘Show me.’
I changed myself into the woman Joel had seen, except this time I wore a blood red dress. Aydin’s eyes traveled from my stilettos, to my blonde hair. ‘You look…very beautiful,’ he said numbly. Remorse twisted my stomach, and I changed back. I looked down at my simple patterned dress, partially hidden by my ordinary auburn hair. Maybe I should have changed my appearance when he first came. ‘And now you look, even more beautiful.’
I walked over to him, and he took me in his arms. ‘I’m scared,’ I admitted.
‘You should be.’ He pushed me away, holding me at arm’s length. There were tears in his eyes. ‘We both should be. I’m sorry I’ve being so…it’s just, if anything happens to you, I’ll never forgive myself.’
I put my hand on his cheek. ‘I believe we can do this,’ I whispered. ‘And I’d rather not exist, than live without you.’
He covered my hand with his. ‘I love you Callie. And I promise, I will not let him hurt you.’
I smiled. ‘Just make sure you keep yourself safe… I have to go watch for him now.’
He nodded. ‘I will be here.’
He embraced me and kissed my forehead. I changed into spirit form as he held me—I wanted his arms to be the last thing I felt.
Rising high above the church I began my search for Joel. His aura was imprinted on me, and I knew I’d be able to detect him well before he reached us, but that still wouldn’t leave much time. Once I knew he was coming, all I had to do was return to the church, transform, and attach the sword. Aydin would hide in the roof beams near the entrance. He would be further away than I liked, but at the same time, I didn’t want him any closer. I would stand on the altar to gain some height advantage. For the millionth time, I reminded myself how fast I had to strike, and for the millionth time I told myself I had to avoid letting Aydin near Joel.
After several hours waiting, I began to fear he wouldn’t come. I’d analyzed the plan so many times I was verging on insanity. So much time alone with my thoughts was not good. Was Aydin having the same problem below? I couldn’t sense him from outside the church, and for one crazy moment, I was convinced he’d left.
I scanned the horizon again, desperately seeking the smallest hint of Joel. Where was he? He should have been here by now. The sun was dipping towards the distant hills and I didn’t want to face Joel at night. Aydin and I had agreed if we didn’t see him before sunset then we would leave, and I was becoming worried that this would be our fate.
I watched anxiously as long fingers of pink light slowly stretched across the sky. I had to focus as there was still a chance he would come. The minutes ticked by and the last of my hope disappeared with the fading light—darkness had won—it was time to run. Acute sadness followed as I pictured Aydin below. Now we had to find another way, and I wasn’t sure I had the strength. With one last look at the horizon I sunk towards the ground, but suddenly he was there, I could feel him, and he was coming fast.
Dropping into the church, I hit the floor in human form. I ran to the altar and only just caught a blur of Aydin as he leaped to the roof. Grabbing the sword, I couldn’t stop shaking as I fastened it to my extended wing. ‘Damn.’ I pulled back my hand; a bead of crimson decorated my fingertip, and I sucked the blood away. Closing my wings, I feigned a relaxed stance.
A winged figure materialized near the roof and fell to the floor. I tried not to gasp. Joel stayed crouched, one hand on the floor, his face cast downwards. I could hear the blood throbbing in my ears.
Gradually his head rose, a quiet smile shaped his red lips. He stood, and an air of serenity settled, bringing a sense of total calm. Irresistible lust entwined its warm fingers around my thighs as I absorbed his mind-numbing beauty—this was happening too fast.
His honey blond hair was slicked back, and his turquoise eyes shone with their angelic glow. Dressed simply in a fitted long-sleeved shirt and dark pants, his midnight black wings reflected the fading light from a window behind him. It created a silver halo, highlighting their borders, masking the menace I was hoping to cling to. This wasn’t a good start. My body roared with desire, taking away every instinct to stay where I was. I wanted to look for Aydin, but I knew this could be fatal. I had to get myself under control.
Tearing my eyes away I swept into a deep bow, letting my wingtips brush the ground. ‘My Lord,’ I gushed.
I peeked up; he appeared pleased, his shoulders swelled. ‘You look even more stunning tonight Callie,’ he said, his liquid tone inviting me to drink. I temporarily blanked, enchanted by the music of his voice.
‘I…I was afraid you wouldn’t come,’ I finally muttered. ‘I was about to leave.’
His head tilted. ‘I have been here most of the day, keeping my distance till I was comfortable with your…intentions. I only decided to join you when I felt your sadness. How could I deny you my company once I knew how upset you were?’
He bestowed a devastating smile which I returned—he’d mistaken my sadness for longing. ‘Indeed, the thought of you not coming would be enough to break any girl’s heart,’ I teased, fighting an ambush of fear.
His eyes flashed with my flattery and his grin faded. ‘You still want to give yourself to me?’ he asked, sounding almost humble.
‘Only if you deliver what you promised.’
Guardian Page 25