I make a mental note to call her out on her bullshit tomorrow. Someone is going to tell me what the hell is going on here.
Sloane clears her throat and slowly turns her head in my direction, almost like she’s fighting against a pull so strong, she might have to use her hands to help out. “I, um, I should go. Have fun tonight. Call me tomorrow.” She manages a smile, and with one last, longing look directed at Max, she pulls open the front door, inviting a whoosh of cold air to assault us until she slams it closed behind her.
Max doesn’t say a word. He just stares at the door. It’s not like him to watch things happen. He’s usually the catalyst in all the action, so seeing him like this is a little unnerving.
“Max? Something you want to tell me?”
He turns, and now I see it. Plain as day. Holy crap.
“What do you mean?” He picks a piece of lint off of his black jacket, avoiding my eyes.
“You couldn’t keep your eyes off of Sloane a few seconds ago, and yet you let her leave this house without so much as a smile. What gives? Did something happen while I was away?” I hedge a bet, not wanting to betray my best friend’s confidence, but desperate for Max’s perspective. God, I would love to see them end up together.
“Nothing worth mentioning.” Max pushes past me and heads for the kitchen, but if he thinks I’m going to let this go, he’s more insane than I thought.
“Okay, so something did happen, like past tense?” I wait, but he remains silent as he pulls out a bottle of water from the refrigerator. A loud sigh escapes my lips. “You know, it’d be nice to know what the hell I’ve missed over the past few months. Nobody is talking? Really?”
Max shrugs. “It’s no big deal. We ran into each other before Thanksgiving and went out a few times. That’s it.”
“It sure seems like there’s more to the story.”
“Not on my end.” He gulps the last of the water, my signal that big bro is finished talking. About Sloane, anyway. “Hey, have you heard from Nico today? I know he’s still battling a lot of shit, but he’s been pretty radio silent all day, and we have that New Year’s Eve event at the club tonight. He told me when to be there, but he’s gone fucking dark.”
My throat tightens, and I grip the corner of the granite island in the center of the kitchen to steady myself. “No, I haven’t heard from him at all. Not since the other night. Maybe he’s just working through things on his own. You know he doesn’t like to open up.” Yeah, I’m pretty well aware of that fact, too, which makes me question why the hell I’m even going to see him. He doesn’t do relationships or feelings. It’s just the way he’s built. Maybe it’s because of the family he was born into, maybe because he realizes that getting too tangled up in emotion is the surest way to lose focus or to expose vulnerability. This life has hardened him, made him the man he is today. He used to be different, but that was a long time ago.
Max stares at me and I shift in my boots, hoping to God he doesn’t see right through my lame explanation. “You look nice. Where are you headed tonight?”
“A couple of my friends from school are meeting at a bar in the city, and I’m going to meet them.”
He nods. “And you didn’t invite Sloane? You’re letting her spend tonight by herself?”
“Of course, I invited her, but she’s working on a paper for school so she took a rain check.”
Another nod. “I can give you a lift if you want to head into the city now. You shouldn’t be driving tonight.”
“Oh, um, thanks, but I need to get some work done, too. I’m only dressed now because Sloane came over to do my hair and makeup. I’m not leaving for a while. I’ll take an Uber.” Jeez, can I shut the heck up already because I’m digging this hole deeper with every breath?
“Okay. Well, be safe. I’ll probably be at the club late, but text me if you need a ride home.”
“Thanks. I’ll probably leave earlier than you, but I’ll text you for sure if I need a ride.”
He grins at me and gives me a little punch in the shoulder. “You look pretty good. Sloane did a halfway decent job on you.”
I roll my eyes. “Gee, thanks. What a vote of confidence.”
He leans against the counter. “Do me a favor.”
“Anything.”
“Stay away from Lucchese.”
I furrow my brow. “That’s so out of left field, Max. What’s the matter with Rocco?”
“I just don’t trust the guy, and I don’t want you anywhere around him.”
“Okay.” My thoughts rewind to the mall kidnapping incident with Lily. I was so flustered that I couldn’t focus much on anything besides finding Lily and deflecting Nico’s advances. “I did see him the other day at the mall. I ran into Nico and Lily, and he showed up. Said something about a meeting.”
Max narrows his eyes. “What kind of meeting?”
“He didn’t give me the itinerary, if that’s what you mean.” I let out a snort. “He seemed off, but that’s just Rocco.”
“And Nico had nothing to say about this meeting?”
“No.” I left out the part where I darted away as fast as I could even though Nico kept convincing me to stay and to give him a chance…to give us a chance. From the look on my brother’s face, I can tell that information wouldn’t bode well for Nico. Or me, for that matter.
He slams a fist onto the granite. “Goddammit,” he mutters.
“What’s wrong? Is there something going on?”
His dark brown eyes, the ones that spit fire only seconds ago, now just seem sad. “I’m really glad you got out, Shaye. I hate like hell that you’re not here, but you can make a great life for yourself down in Miami. Sometimes, I...” He rakes a hand through his hair. “I’d love the chance to take a breath, too.”
I tug on a long curl and wind it around my finger. He sounds pretty defeatist right now. Not at all like the Maximo who plans to conquer the world. “You’re not stuck here, Max. You know that.”
He nods. “I know that I have responsibilities, Shaye. And that I can’t just restart every time I mess up. I have to keep playing the game. I can’t get out.”
Funny how he thinks that my ‘getting out’ is as easy as hopping a plane to another state. I thought the same thing. I was so very wrong.
Nico
Three soft little knocks at the front door have me springing off the couch like my ass is on fire. Channel surfing has done little to keep my mind off of work. Even in the quiet peace of my own home, the feeling of being slowly suffocated always manages to consume me. Maybe that’s why I asked Shaye to come over. Maybe having Shaye in my bed will chase away everything that plagues me on a nightly basis. Or maybe I just need her because she fills the void that has been eating away at my heart since she stepped onto that plane months ago.
I walk to the front door and pull it open. My lips curl upward just seeing her on my stoop, almost as if I’ve been given confirmation that she wants this as badly as I do. “Hey,” I murmur, holding out a hand.
She takes it and steps inside, kicking off the short boot things she’s wearing. I eye the heel and wonder how she managed to avoid breaking her neck on the ice on my driveway and front walkway, but she’s a girl, and they seem to have some magical power over the elements when it comes to wearing heels. “Hey,” she says, a tinge of pink coloring her cheeks.
I reach up and slide the beanie off of her head, freeing her blonde waves. They flow around her shoulders, which I decide I need to see more of right at this moment. I unbutton her coat, and she shrugs it off, revealing a low-cut black top that gives me an insta-hard-on.
But the art of restraint is one that I perfected long ago. I want more than anything to feel her soft skin under my fingertips, to feel the curves of her body pressed against me, to hear her moans of pleasure when I fill her with everything I have to give.
She needs to know this is more than sex, that I want so much more than that.
I want it all, and she’s it.
We may only have a few
weeks before she goes back to Miami, but I’m not letting her go until she believes, to her very core, that this thing between us is the forever kind. And that leaves me with a lot of convincing to do.
I hang her coat on the rack, and cup her face with my hands, bringing my mouth down to hers. I graze them slowly. The flavor of bubble gum lingers on her lips, reminding me of that sweet innocence, the one I took away from her only days before.
No, this is so much more than just sex.
“I’m glad you came,” I whisper against her mouth, unwilling to drag myself away from that kiss but knowing that if I continue, I’ll lose control of my body. I’ve already lost control of my heart, so I don’t have much left to cling to at this point.
She gazes up at me, quiet for a second. I can see a lot of apprehension in those half-hooded blue eyes, and I want to chase it all away. There’s only one way to do that, and it isn’t carrying her up to my bedroom. Not yet, anyway.
“I’m still not sure why I’m here, Nico.”
“I needed to see you.”
She cocks her head to the side, the long pink tips grazing the side of her breast. I try hard not to look because if I let my eyes linger there for one second too long, I’ll forget about my plans and slide that shirt right off of her shoulders. “I know, but this is dangerous. And stupid. And—"
“Perfect.” My hands move from her face down to her arms. “That’s what comes to my mind, Shaye.”
Her eyes widen, mouth agape. “I wasn’t expecting that…from you.”
I drop my head, nuzzling her ear, inhaling the sweet fruity scent of her hair. My head is woozy, as if I’m drunk on the emotions coursing through me, and I don’t know how to respond. I’ve always been in complete control of everything, especially my feelings. I have no tells, and I like it that way. It gives me an edge. But with Shaye, I have no advantage. She may think I hold the cards, but she’s wrong. So dead wrong.
Shaye presses her body into me, tilting her head back, giving my lips full access to the smooth column of her neck. They tingle with temptation, but I cannot give in to the urge. She doesn’t trust me. I can tell she wants to, but I haven’t done much to convince her that I’m not the guy she thinks I am, the guy I was so long ago.
Life has hardened me, and I don’t like who I’ve become. Obligation has filled me with regret. I don’t expect her to believe in me right away. Hell, I’ve given her plenty of reasons to run in the opposite direction, but yet here she is, plastered against me…so close that I can feel the quick beat of her heart in time with my own.
“I know what I want.” My fingers tangle in her soft waves, my cock straining against my jeans. It’s a silent plea for release, but tonight isn’t about me. It’s about her.
She leans her head against my chest. “This is a bad idea. I can’t…I won’t be able to…I’m leaving soon, and…I mean, what if someone finds out? Max will murder you. My father will probably murder me…”
I tilt her chin up so I can gaze deep into her soulful eyes. There was always so much going on in her expressions. It was something I’d grown to love about her. Unlike me, she could never hide her true feelings. Or play poker, for that matter. Tells. She has them all. And tonight is no exception. “Shaye, you knew the risks when you came over here.”
“I didn’t ever claim to be the brightest bulb in the chandelier, did I?” She puffs out her chest and cocks an eyebrow, her lips in a half-smirk. Her snarky tone coupled with that come-hither look is sexy as fuck. I have to clench my fists to keep myself from throwing her on my couch and stripping her bare.
Good God, I want to shove my dick in her mouth so badly right now…
I close the space between us, hovering over her, trying to prove…what, exactly? That she can bring me to my knees with a flip of her hair? That she always could, even though I’ve never let on to it? I’ve never allowed myself to be so affected by a woman, and when she left for Miami, I told myself a million times over it was for the best. Being in love with your best friend’s sister is bad enough, but when it’s Maximo Oriani’s little sister? That’s grounds for complete and utter decimation in his eyes.
“Tell me something.” I place my hands on her shoulders. “Are the risks worth it? The sneaking around, the lying...does it change the way you feel? Does it change what you want?”
She doesn’t move. Not a single muscle. She just stares me down, even though I have two hands on her. My chest is so tight. There were never any promises made, not on either of our parts. She’s still leaving…moving on from this life. I’m staying behind, immersed in an existence I was plunged into without a thought. Only Shaye can yank me out. She’s my lifeline. She’s fucking everything, and I can’t let her leave until she knows it.
I have to figure out how to make this thing between us work while she’s in Miami. I won’t let her slip through my fingers again, and I’ll wait as long as it takes for her to come back to me.
A smile finally plays at her shiny lips, and I slowly expel the breath I suddenly realize I’ve been holding. “You know, I’ve always put off happiness, Nico. Always moving forward with my life, always making plans and having things to look forward to. Do you know why?”
I shake my head. “Tell me.”
She bites her lower lip and stares at the floor for a long minute before speaking. “It’s because the one thing that made me truly happy was out of reach. So, I compensated by looking toward other things that could bring me some satisfaction. It was my way of dealing with my feelings, and it’s worked for me.”
“But?”
“But I don’t want to live that way anymore.”
“I don’t either.”
She furrows her brow but says nothing. She has no idea the torture that I’ve survived all of these years, being so close but never able to reach out and really touch her. Even that night before she left for school…I didn’t let her in. I couldn’t. And not because of Max or her father. I don’t live the kind of life that ends with a happily ever after. There is always too much danger lurking, too many goons with axes to grind, too many power hungry cocksuckers who have nothing to lose. If I’d given in to those feelings, the ones I’ve been harboring for as long as I can remember, then I’d have something to lose.
And losing Shaye because of choices I’ve made and people I’ve crossed…I just couldn’t live with that.
So I made a conscious, logical, and rational choice to let her go.
Burying the temptation to just walk away from everything was easy once Shaye got on that plane, and I dealt with my circumstances…until she came back and sent my whole world into complete upheaval. She makes me realize what I’ve been missing, what I could have in return for all of the money, toys, and power.
And I like the alternative. A lot.
Shaye
I just bore my soul to this guy, yet again. How much more am I going to give him, for Christ’s sake? Or maybe the more apropos question is how much more is he going to take from me?
But I can’t hold back when it comes to Nico. I never could. It’s why I ended up in his arms so many months ago…and then again the other night…and here I am, back for more of whatever he’s willing to give me tonight.
I keep hoping he’s going to be the one to say the words, but somehow, they all end up tumbling out of my big mouth. Hashtag no filter. Yep, that’s me.
“I’m sorry, Shaye. For everything.”
“I didn’t come here for apologies. I knew what I was doing.” I take a few steps back, because the closer he gets, the readier I am to leap into his arms. And I need to practice some restraint, dammit! I’m just as bad as those Moreno twins. Blech.
“Yeah, but I didn’t know what I was doing. I haven’t for a while.” He averts his eyes, running a hand through his tousled, dark hair. I bite the inside of my mouth, watching his fingers drag through the glossy mess of strands. I flex my fingers to eradicate the twitching sensation of wanting to replace his fingers with my own. God, I want to devour every inch of this ma
n. I want to trace over the cuts of muscle that lay under his clothes, I want to lick each and every indentation along his arms and across his chest. But most of all, I want to taste those perfect lips. I want to feel them command my mouth, my neck, my breasts, and oh God, so much more…
My body temperature climbs about fifty degrees as my mind drifts into the land of salaciousness that is Nico Salesi. No, no, no…I really need to focus here, and not on the carnal desires that have been plaguing me at night while I sleep in my bed. Alone.
“Shaye…” His low, gravelly voice rumbles through me, sending quakes of excitement and anticipation rippling through me.
“Yes?” I whisper. My knees wobble slightly, and I lean back against the banister to steady myself, not convinced I’d be able to control my urges if I grabbed onto Nico instead. No, the banister is a much safer, albeit sobering, option. It will keep me standing upright and won’t make me tingle in places that will cloud my already questionable judgement.
“Do you want some hot chocolate?”
My jaw drops. He knows me too well.
Swiss Miss just happens to be my other kryptonite. Any time I’d been sad about something when I was younger, my mom would always make it for me. It never failed to put a smile on my face. Except that one time Nico attempted to make it just like Mom did…
He failed. Pretty miserably, since he made it with water instead of milk.
“I have the Marshmallow Lover’s kind.” His lips curl into a smirk.
“Yeah, but are they—?”
“Yep. They are. All of your favorite colors.”
I tap a finger against my mouth, pretending to consider his offer even though I know that diluting these sick, lustful fantasies with a little bit of cocoa is a damn smart idea. “Well, then. Look who’s all prepared for visitors.”
“Not just any visitors, Shaye.” His eyes sear a hole into my soul. “Just you.”
Screwing the Mob (The Mob Lust Series Book 1) Page 10