by Bella Jay
If Quint hadn’t told him she had been there while he was unconscious, he wouldn’t have known what to think. It hurt that the person he loved and put his life on the line for, wasn’t there when he needed her most.
His family didn’t give him the same peace she did.
He grunted as he reached for his phone next to his uneaten tray of food. His injured ribs made every movement harder and painful. The bullet Caiden had delivered to him when they struggled with the gun, had struck him through the right side of his chest an inch below his nipple. It broke a rib, nicked his liver and punctured his lung before halting below the skin of his right lat muscle.
The doctors had patched him up but his recovery would take weeks.
A knock sounded on his door and Kyree didn’t even look when it opened as he toyed over the text he wanted to send to Tessah.
It was about time for Shayla to bring him lunch like she had for the past two days. However, as his favorite scent tickled his nose, he whipped his head to see her.
“Hey,” Tessah gave him a small wave as if their bodies had never been one with one another.
Anger replaced the happiness he expected to feel when he saw her. “So you showed up?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” he echoed. “How do you think it makes me feel my girl hasn’t been to see me since I woke up?”
“I said I’m sorry.” Kyree grunted as he adjusted himself in the bed. “You need help?”
She stepped towards him as he raised his palm. “I got it.” His pride outweighed his pain. “What’s really been up Tessah?”
She pushed her curls behind her ears. “I came to tell you I’m moving to Miami with Siah. I didn’t want to leave without—”
“What did you just say?” The words were daggers as they replayed in his head.
“After what happened, I can’t — we shouldn’t—” She sucked in air. “It’s best I move to Miami.”
“Best for who?” he snapped, ignoring the sharp pain through his ribs. She had to be fucking with him. There was no way she’d break up with him — right now. In his most vulnerable state.
“For us. I—” She opened her mouth wide but said nothing.
“You what?”
“When I thought you weren’t going to wake up… it hurt. I don’t want to experience that again.”
“What the hell did you have to experience? You’re not the one in the hospital bed.”
“Exactly,” she choked out.
Every vein in Kyree’s body throbbed. “You’re going to leave me because I almost died? You gotta be fucking with me.”
“I’m sorry,” she stuttered, her eyes planted on the ground.
“Stop fucking saying that shit.” He hurled the tray of food. The mashed potatoes decorated the gloomy white walls. “How about YOU can you fucking be? All you care about is you Tessah. One nigga tried to kill me over you and another all in your damn messages and yet here I am still giving a damn about you. I must be boo boo the fucking fool over your trifling ass. My fault because I peeped the chick you were from jump. Played my ass, huh? Get the fuck out. You wanna be done… we done.”
“Kyree please listen to me.”
Her glossed over eyes made his blood boil over. “Listen to you what? Feed me more bullshit? Or use that same ‘I’m new to all this’ excuse?”
Tessah’s arms wrapped around her body as the windows to her soul told him she had more to say but she said nothing. Nothing.
“I’ve been nothing but a real ass man with you. Patient as hell and tried my best to be understanding and not box you in with the rest of the trifling ass females in this world. But you took it all for granted and showed me why I should stick with my gut.”
His room door opened and his cousin walked in with a bag from Panera. “I got—Um what the hell did I walk in on?” Shayla asked, her eyes bounced between the two. The tension couldn’t be masked.
“Nothing. She’s leaving.”
“Kyree,” Tessah pleaded, “I didn’t wa—”
“We good. Enjoy Miami.”
The sounds of the machines in the room covered the awkward silence before Shayla said, “He doesn’t want you here so you need to go.” Her head dropped to the side as she pointed at the door.
Tessah’s eyes met Kyree’s, and he stared back at her with nothing but an ice cold heart. He wasn’t chasing or begging no one who was too wrapped in themselves to give a fuck about him. She wanted out — she got that.
March
“The thing about being selfish is that you don't care if someone is at your feet begging you to stay with him, offering you the world, his heart and soul. It doesn't matter. You'll do whatever you want to do. What you need to do for yourself. Nothing matters but what you want. What you think you need.” — Mia Asher, Arsen: A Broken Love Story
“HOW’S MIAMI TREATING YOU?” Landon asked Tessah via FaceTime. The last few weeks had been an adjustment.
“Better than expected. You should’ve come down for Spring Break. I turned the fuck up.” If by turn up she meant binge watch shows on Netflix — then she’d had the best break ever.
“I bet your ass did, but I might have to slide through for Memorial Day though. Ivan been talking about one last hoorah trip before we have to start adulting and shit.”
“They’ll be dope. I’m down. Speaking of adulting… when you gon’ tell Adalyn about G?” Him and Adalyn were back together and Tessah was happy for him, but she’d seen how his current actions were hurting her friend. Gynah didn’t deserve it.
“Ain’t shit to tell. Whatever the fuck growing inside her ain’t my seed. I barely came in her that night.”
Tessah frowned. “But you came right?”
“Tessah I ain’t tryna hear this shit man.”
“Landon James Matthews, you’re gonna have to!” Tessah would not sugarcoat shit for him. Someone needed to call him out on his bullshit.
“Well, hurry and say your peace so you can get off my line ‘cause I ain’t call you to talk about your tryna trap my ass friend.”
“You and I both know you willingly fucked her raw but you don’t want to admit it because then you’d be admitting you got caught up. You like G. I’ve been around your behind long enough to know you don’t make slip ups like this except for girls you’re feeling.”
“I never had a problem admitting I care about Gynah. Cared. But my heart belongs to Adalyn. G was cool to kick it with and satisfy my extra needs but our situation always been casual. I ain’t sell her no dreams so why the fuck would she want to keep a baby by a nigga she knows ain’t gon’ be hers? She deserves more than being somebody’s baby mama.”
Tessah placed her hand on her heart. “Wow… that was actually some sentimental shit to say, but it’s not up to you what she does. It’s her choice.”
“I’m not claiming her baby.”
“Landon, Gynah ain’t gonna take this shit lying down. I’m warning you as both of y’all friend. Don’t let her southern charm fool you. She’s been loyal as far as your side piece but she been saying shit lately that got me questioning her next move.”
“What kind of shit?”
Tessah bit her tongue. It was difficult being both of their friends but she tried her best to stay neutral. “Don’t worry about it but promise me you’ll reach out to her and clean this mess up.”
“All right sis, damn. But I’m not claiming no baby until Maury say I’m the pappi.”
“Lord… what am I gonna do with you?”
“Love me and celebrate my birthday to the fullest.”
“I guess. I still gotta find something to wear.”
“Ky said he gon’ be there,” he revealed and Tessah turned her attention from him. The mention of Kyree put her in a mood.
She replayed their break up over in her head and it hurt more each time but she kept telling herself it was for the best. Even if he’d dragged her ass.
“Why?”
“Damn,” Landon croaked. “Well it’s my
birthday. We cool.”
“Okay.”
“Tess—”
“Landon. I’m not discussing it okay?”
Landon nodded. “You quick to read my ass about my shit but when it’s my turn you wanna shut down.”
“I’m not shutting down.”
“What you doing then? I’m trying to understand shit because it blows me. Y’all were all in love and shit one minute and the next… you’re in Miami.” She said nothing because they’d had this conversation before.
“Are you done this time? Because I’m supposed to be getting ready to go out to dinner with a new prospect.”
Lie of the century but discussing her and Kyree’s demise wasn’t a topic of discussion. She’d done what was necessary. For once she hadn’t been selfish and one day when he finds someone who won’t have him on a death bed, he’ll thank her.
“I love you Tee but you fucked up. Ky definitely a better nigga than me.”
“Won’t argue with you there,” she said, and they shared a laugh.
“Fuck you. Yo ass foul for agreeing, ‘ol ugly ass. Anyway man, before I hang up on you, what’s the update with Caidan?”
Tessah cheeks swelled as she blew out hot air. “He pled guilty to the charges and doesn’t want a trial. He hasn’t received sentencing though.”
“Damn. I hope his ass rots.”
Tessah nodded but couldn’t bring herself to agree. What Caidan had done was beyond forgivable, but she couldn’t deny her role in what got him there. It was a lesson she’d always learn from.
❖❖❖
Six weeks post shooting and his body finally wasn’t screaming at him. Kyree had gone the whole week not needing to take pain medicine for his ribs and overall he felt normal again.
Physically.
Mentally his resentment got the best of him a lot. But the little person who ran his life kept him in check and going.
“Daddy when I gonna see Mommy?” Cherry sat in his lap trying to pick non existent boogers out of his nose.
“Soon baby,” he answered, pained. Chandra had seen Cherry once since he took full custody of her two months ago. In the beginning, she called multiple times threatening to take him to court, report his illegal activity, and do everything but murder him if he didn’t give her child back. The calls slowed down and by the time he was hospitalized, no one could find Chandra.
His mom, Quint, and Shayla had gone by her house multiple times and nothing. It pissed him off she’d abandoned their daughter the way she had but he prayed for her well-being. Despite her flaws, Cherry needed her and he hoped she remembered that.
“What’s soon? Tomorrow?”
“Soon.” He planted a soft kiss on her little lips and she smiled. Her smile made everything right in the world if only for a second. “You got your stuff ready to go to Uncle Q’s house?”
“Mmhmm,” she sang as he patted her little butt as she got off his lap.
Tonight Shayla and him were going to Landon’s birthday party while Quint and Ryan got abused by Cherry. He’d debated whether he’d go, but he needed a night out.
By the time Shayla arrived at his house dressed like she ain’t have much sense, Quint had already scooped up his little terrorist.
“I brought you a gift,” she said, waving a large envelope. He didn’t have to ask what it was.
“It ain’t more clothes for you,” he joked, eyeing her romper. From the front alone, he knew her ass cheeks had to be poking out the back. He’d hate to check someone over her if they got disrespectful.
“My dude ain’t complain,” she sassed, handing him the envelope. He placed it on the nearby table. “You ain’t gonna check ‘em out? You did good little big cousin. I’m a proud teacher and that girl’s body is everything.”
“I had no intentions of developing them Shay.”
“Figured but that’s dope work. She might want them.”
“Oh well,” Kyree said, ready to drop the conversation. There was no way in hell he would take a peek at the nude photoshoot he’d done of Tessah. His anxiety and annoyance were already at an eight.
Shayla smacked her lips. “I ain’t even gon’ press you on it ‘cause you already know how I feel about girl.”
Kyree shook his head. “Yo ass ain’t never been one to hide how you felt.”
“A part of my charm. You ready?”
“Yeah, let’s take a shot first.”
An hour later Shayla and Kyree strolled into the party. People were all around the club enjoying themselves and the turn up level was what Kyree needed.
“Her and your boy best friends right? You think she gon’ be here?” Shayla asked, making him cringe. He didn’t want to think about his high probability of running into his selfish ass ex.
He shrugged. “But if you see her Shay… be good.”
Shayla balled up her face. “As in what?”
He cut his eyes at his firecracker of a cousin. “Like don’t start shit. Let her be because I’m about to be in my zone and back to pretending she doesn’t exist. Maybe find me a baddie to get my groove back or something.”
Shayla kissed her teeth. “Tessah deserves these hands.” She wiggled her fingers. “She broke your heart and unlike Chan’s wack ass, she doesn’t have a child by you. Fair game in my eyes.”
Kyree groaned. “This why I invited Quint to come… you’re too damn violent.”
“Well Quint picked bae over you…” She shrugged.
“I said what I said Shayla. I’m over it so ain’t no point.”
“You’re not and—”
“Drop it,” he snapped, and her mouth glued itself shut as he guided them through the crowd.
Shayla meant well and as much as he looked out for her, she’d always did the same for him twice over. She didn’t play about any of her cousins but her and Kyree had a different bond and her loyalty to him was unwavering.
“Damn,” Kyree sang as he watched Landon drop to one knee and ask his girl to marry him. He’d gotten on stage to thank everyone and shocked his girl. With a smile she accepted his proposal and as congrats swarmed the entire crowd, she revealed to him they were expecting their first child.
He was happy for Landon but pillow talk with Tessah had him privy to information he knew would hit the fan one day. Nothing done in the dark stays there.
“You gon stay here while I go tell Landon and his girl congrats?” Kyree peeked down at his cousin as she vibed out to a Davido song. She nodded her head while lifting her drink.
Kyree made his way through the crowd and wanted to turn back as soon as he laid eyes on Landon’s section. “Fuck,” he mumbled as he glimpsed Tessah. He kissed his teeth. Fuck It. I ain’t letting her ass ruin my night.
Her body faced away from him but as if she sensed his presence, her head whipped around as he entered the section.
She sucked the breath from his lungs as their eyes met but Landon snapped him from her trance. “Motherfucking Kyree!”
“What’d it do bro?” Kyree chuckled as they slapped hands. “I came to say congrats to you,” he looked at Landon’s girlfriend, “and you!”
“Thank you!” Adalyn cheesed and wiggled her left hand.
Landon shook his head at her but smiled. “Thanks, bro. I’m too lit to register I’m about to be a dad.”
“I remember the feeling.” Kyree grinned, thinking about Cherry.
“By the way have you met,” he tapped Tessah who’d been standing beside him like a mute, “my best friend. Haha wait,” he chuckled, “y’all already know each other.”
Tessah rolled her eyes at him as Kyree gave her a head nod. “Sup.”
“Hey,” she said with a small smile. “How you—”
“Yo Lan, I gotta get back to my cousin,” he said cutting across Tessah. There was no way he’d waste more words on her. “I left her little hot ass by the bar and her dude not about to have my neck. I’ll hit you before I leave.”
“Bet.” They dapped and Kyree rushed out of the section.
&n
bsp; Hot air blew from his mouth as he got beside his cousin. “Guess who I ran into?”
“Is she stunning with beautiful brown skin, slim and deserve these hands?”
“Yo! What’s wrong with you?”
Shayla shrugged. “Well how’d it go?”
“Like I’ma have one more shot and find someone to take the edge off.”
Kyree and Shayla continued their night and by the time the lights to the club came on, Tessah still occupied his mind but he hadn’t seen her since. He wouldn’t complain as he closed out his tab.
“I gotta pee, don’t move,” Shayla instructed as she scurried off towards the restrooms.
Kyree scanned the crowd as everyone made their way to the exit.
Stop looking for her to torture yourself. She played you. Multiple times.
“Where is that damn girl,” he mumbled under his breath as he pulled out his phone to text his cousin. It had been over ten minutes. As he opened her thread, a message came through.
Shayla: Come to the ladies room.
Without hesitation, he started towards the direction.
Kyree: You good?
Shayla: Yeah…
Shayla stood outside the ladies room with her arms crossed and her face in a frown as he approached. “What’s wrong?”
She huffed. “Come.” Her small hand wrapped around his elbow as she dragged him inside.
“Yo Shay… what the—fuck.” His body stalled at the sight of Tessah laid out on a small couch inside the room. “What happened to her?” He took strides to her.
“She’s just drunk. She’s coherent because she recognized me.”
Kyree ran his hand down his face. “What you want me to do Shay?” He didn’t want to hear the answer.
With a scowl she said, “I hate to say this but you can’t leave her like this. She’s shitfaced.”
He kissed his teeth and squatted in front of her. “Tessah.” She moaned her answer. “Who you came with?” No response. He patted her on the cheek. “Who did you come with?”
“G,” she groaned.
“Where is she?”
“Gone.”