“She went back with one of the nurses. Other than that, I don’t know.”
Sondra worried her lip as she stared at the receptionist desk. Then she began to unscrew the thermos. “Coffee?”
James shook his head. From the rock in his stomach, he wasn’t in the mood to consume anything. “No.”
Sondra hesitated and then began screwing the lid back on. She set it down on the ground next to her and then straightened, settling her hands in her lap.
She sighed and glanced around, her gaze finally landing on James. He could see her staring at him from the corner of his eye. He thought he could ignore it, but that turned out to be impossible.
He wasn’t sure he was ready for the frank conversation his mom was silently gunning for. His heart was broken, and dissecting a past he’d kept from her for so long wasn’t high on his priority list.
“What, Ma?” he asked. When it came to Sondra, she was going to win no matter how he felt.
He might as well get it over with.
“What happened?”
He cleared his throat and shook his head. How was he supposed to tell his mom that he might have hurt Layla? That his dreams haunted him, and Layla would pay the price for it.
He parted his lips to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, a tear rolled down his cheek. He was exhausted, carrying this guilt for so long. He’d always thought he could be a good person, but that proved to be impossible at every turn.
Frustrated that he was so weak, he wiped at the tear and swallowed, hoping to push down his emotions. But it was too late.
His mom’s arms wrapped around him and she crushed him against her.
Everything seemed so hazy. Like his emotions were clouding his senses, but he swore he heard her say, “My baby.”
And in that moment, he felt broken. In that moment, all he wanted was to connect to the people that cared about him. He’d spent so much of his time and energy shutting people out that he was exhausted.
So he wrapped his arms around his mom and pulled her closer. He let down the wall he’d built up to protect himself and to protect those he loved.
He wasn’t sure how much time passed until his mom pulled back. Her eyes were puffy, and tears were streaming down her face. She smiled at him as she reached out and cradled his cheek.
“You were always the protector in the family,” she said, her voice soft and filled with emotion.
James dropped his gaze as too many feelings floated to the surface. He swallowed, trying to still his tears.
“But sometimes, we’re not that ones that need protection. We’re strong and we love you. It’s okay for you to need protection too.” Sondra dropped her hand to his.
He stared at her hand as her words sunk in around him. They rang true. Even though Juan had asked him to protect Layla, the truth was she’d protected him. She’d reached a part of him that he thought he’d closed off forever.
“I hurt her, Mom,” he said. It came out low and garbled. Like his body was trying to stop him from speaking.
When Sondra didn’t respond, he glanced up at her.
“I hurt her,” he said again.
Sondra furrowed her brow as she studied him. “Honey, what?”
James cleared his throat as he gathered the courage to actually tell the truth. “Ever since I came back, I’ve been having dreams. I get…violent.” He closed his eyes as he thought about everything he could have done to Layla. If he had hurt her, he didn’t mean to, but he couldn’t control it.
Sondra tsked him. “Honey, I’ve known you your whole life. You wouldn’t hurt a fly. If that’s happening, it’s ‘cause there’s something inside of you that needs fixing. It’s not who you are. You’re hurting. And that’s okay.”
James glanced up to see his mom smile at him. She didn’t look scared or disgusted. Just worried.
“But—”
Sondra held up her hand. “There’s enough bad in the world. There's no reason for you to think you're part of it. What you did for our country we can never repay. Now it’s time that your country gave back to you. You have PTSD.”
He smiled as her mom-voice took over. He'd heard it so many times when she was about to lay down the law. He spent so much of his time since he got back running from everyone in his life, but he’d never felt more at peace than he did right now, sitting next to his mom.
She patted his hand. “We’ll get through this. And I’m sure if Layla was here, she’d say the same.”
James’s heart stuttered in his chest as he thought of the girl he loved, sitting somewhere in the hospital, alone. A burning desire rose up in his chest as he stood. “I’ve got to go to her,” he said. “I’ve got to find her.”
Sondra cheered as she gathered up her things and followed him. “That’s my boy. I’ll go with you.”
James turned and stared down at his mom. She met his gaze and then paused.
“Or I’ll just wait here.” She held up her thermos. “I’ve got coffee to drink anyway.”
James leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “I love you, Mom.”
She grinned. “I love you. Now, go to her.”
James nodded as he turned to head over to the receptionist. As he moved away from his mom, he heard her sit down next to an elderly man and offer him a doughnut. He couldn’t help the soft smile that emerged on his lips as he reveled in the feeling of coming home.
Everything in his life seemed to be coming into focus. The only thing missing was Layla. He was going to fight for her until his last breath—and even after.
He approached the receptionist desk and leaned his arm on the counter. The older woman with greying hair was typing on the keyboard in front of her.
“Hang on, sweetie. Just finishing something up.”
James nodded and moved to lean on both of his elbows. He watched her, willing her to work faster.
After what felt like an eternity, she finished typing and glanced up. “What can I do for you?”
James cleared his throat. “I came here with a woman. Layla? I wanted to make sure she’s okay. I’m her contact here.”
The woman narrowed her eyes and then recognition crossed her face. “Right. She’s not down here anymore.”
James stared at her. “What?”
The receptionist glanced around. “They sent her up to labor and delivery.”
James’s ears felt as if they were ringing. “Why would they send her up there?”
The receptionist pinched her lips together. “I’m sorry. I can’t give more information.”
Too stunned to speak, James turned and made his way back over to his mom. She must have read his face because she furrowed her brow.
“What happened?”
James collapsed on the chair next to her. “She…was transferred to Labor and Delivery.”
That seemed to stun even his mom.
“She’s pregnant?”
James glanced over. “Is that what labor and delivery means?”
Sondra nodded. “That’s the only reason they would send her there.”
James scrubbed his face. If she was pregnant, that meant Juan was most likely the father. His stomach twisted as he thought about his friend, not knowing what his ex-fiancée was hiding. Or that the man he thought was his friend had bailed on not only Layla, but his baby as well.
“James Braxton, what are you still doing down here?”
James snapped his attention back to his mom. She was staring at him with an expectant look. His eyes widened as he stood. “I should go?” Then he felt like an idiot. “I should go,” he said, turning toward the hallway just off the emergency room. He found a sign for labor and delivery and followed it.
“If she’s up there, she needs us,” Sondra said.
James glanced behind him to find his mom was following him. A wave of relief washed over him. He was grateful she was coming. He doubted that Layla wanted him there, but Sondra was persistent. He could use her tenacity.
They were quiet in the
elevator as they took it to the fourth floor. As soon as the doors opened, James swallowed.
He was so out of his element.
A woman in a robe shuffled by in front of him. She had one hand pressed against her back and her other hand holding her stomach.
Not sure what to do, he just nodded at her as they passed by.
“We’re here to see Layla,” his mom said to the receptionist behind the desk.
Sondra must have come across as more forceful than he had downstairs because the nurse just nodded and waved for them to follow. She guided them down the hall and pointed to a door.
“She’s in here,” the nurse said.
Sondra nodded and then turned to stare expectantly at James. “Well?” she asked.
Wild bears couldn’t keep him from protecting Layla, but it felt wrong to intrude. She’d kept this secret the entire time they’d been together. Forcing her to tell him now felt like a violation of her privacy.
“I’m going to give you advice that I should have followed a long time ago. When someone pushes you away, that’s when they need you the most.” Sondra pointed her finger toward the door. “She’s pregnant and alone. You get in there. She needs you.”
James studied his mom. A resolution rose up inside of him. What Sondra said was right. Layla needed him. And he was going to be there for her no matter what.
So, without giving himself time to doubt, he nodded and knocked. A soft response sounded from inside, so James pushed on the door handle and entered.
A soft thumping sound could be heard from inside. James took a deep breath and entered.
Layla was lying on the bed with her eyes closed. A blanket was pulled up over her waist. The monitors next to her were displaying all kinds of information. He could see two separate lines with what looked like heartbeats.
He stood there, not sure what to do. She looked so peaceful that he didn’t want to wake her.
Just as he turned to leave, her soft voice stopped him.
“Hey.”
James stood rooted to the floor. Then, feeling like an idiot, he turned to study her. She looked tired. Like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.
And that broke him.
“Hey,” he said. He crossed the room to stand next to her bed. He wasn’t sure what to say. Part of him feared he’d intruded when he shouldn’t have. That she would be upset that he’d forced her hand. But, now that he was here, he might as well stay.
“How are you feeling?” he asked.
Layla shrugged as she tried to sit up. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
James grabbed the nearby chair and pulled it over so he could sit next to her. He acted on instinct and reached out to grab her hand. He held it gently in-between his own.
Then he leaned forward and pressed his lips to it.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
Layla’s soft chuckle startled him. He glanced up to see her studying him.
“For what? I’m the one who didn’t tell you about…” Her voice drifted off as she glanced over at the monitor.
“It’s okay. I understand,” he said.
A tear rolled down Layla’s cheek, and she pulled her hand away so she could brush it away. “I understand if this is too complicated for you. I understand if you want to leave.”
Frustration rose up inside of him. Not frustration with her, just that she thought this would chase him away. “Layla, I love you and I’m going to love that baby.”
When Layla didn’t turn to look at him, James worried he’d said something wrong.
“You do?”
James straightened so he could meet her eyes. “Layla, I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you in that photoshoot. I got dressed in ridiculous clothes for you.” He straightened so he could rest his forehead on hers. “I was destined to protect you like you’ve protected me.”
He pulled back so she could feel the full weight of his words. “We’re both broken parts. It only makes sense that, together, we make the whole we’ve been searching for.”
Layla dropped her jaw in an exaggerated movement. “Wow. That was profound.”
James shrugged as he sat on the edge of the bed. He reached out and cradled both of her hands in his own. “What do you say? Take this crazy journey with me?”
Layla’s expression stilled as she stared at him. He could see her emotions rise up inside of her. Like she was fighting an inner demon.
And he knew what that was like. He had plenty of inner demons himself.
“What if you get bored of me? Or something else becomes more important? I can’t put this baby’s heart at risk.”
James reached up to cradle her cheek. He looked into her eyes. There were so many ways he wanted to show her that what he was about to say was real, but for now, he would settle with telling her.
“Because I’m not going to go anywhere. You’re my person. You’re who I want to walk through this life with. If I can fall in love with you as much as I have in a few short days, I can only imagine how head over heels I’m going to be for you in the years to come.”
Layla’s frown morphed into a smile as she giggled. “Wow. You really know how to lay on the sauce.”
James shrugged. “I’ve been practicing.”
Layla raised her eyebrows. “Really?”
James shook his head. “No. I just say what I feel.”
Layla scooted to the other side of the bed and patted the space beside her. James slipped off his shoes and settled in next to her. She held his hand for a moment before she slipped it onto her stomach.
A warm feeling exploded through his body as he lay there next to her, feeling her unborn baby.
“Do you hear that?” she asked.
James glanced over at her to see her pointing to her ear. “That thumping noise?”
Layla nodded. “It’s the baby’s heartbeat.”
Keeping his hand on her stomach, James pushed up with his other hand until he was leaning over her. He met her gaze, hoping she could feel just how much he loved her, then dipped down to press his lips to hers.
Their kiss was soft at first but it grew more urgent. Layla wrapped her hands around his neck, tangling her fingers in his hair.
Everything broken inside of James felt as if it were healing. As if Layla was exactly what he needed to be whole again. She was rapidly becoming his air. His reason to live.
And the baby just added to the happiness.
A sharp knock on the door caused Layla to giggle and pull away. James tried not to growl as he flopped back on the small sliver of bed she’d made for him. Layla adjusted the blankets and then called out, “Come in.”
“Is it okay?” Sondra’s voice sounded after the door clicked open.
Layla turned to James, who just shrugged. “She came,” he said.
“Of course,” Layla said.
When Sondra walked in, her gaze fell on James, and he could see the glee written all over her face. She squealed as she rushed over to wrap Layla up into a hug.
“I knew you two were perfect for each other,” Sondra said as she pulled back. Then she hesitated as he motioned toward Layla’s stomach. “The baby?”
James could see the soft glow coming from Layla as she reached down to gently touch her stomach. “Just a little bleeding, that was all. Baby’s perfectly fine.”
Sondra lifted her fists into the air in a celebratory manner. “Another grandbaby,” she exclaimed.
Embarrassment rushed to James’s cheeks. “Ma,” he said, giving her a stern look.
Layla laughed. “It’s okay. I’m happy your mom is excited.”
Sondra shot him a child don’t mess with me look. “That’s right. Layla is a Braxton now, which means that baby is a Braxton.” Then Sondra’s pointer finger came out. “And don’t you go breaking this girl’s heart, you hear me?”
James lifted his hands. “Of course.”
Sondra turned her attention to Layla and they began talking baby stuff. James slipped off the bed an
d over to the chair so he could sit back and observe.
His chest swelled as he watched his mom and the woman he loved talking. It was like everything he’d ever gone through had led up to this moment. Even though there were parts of him that were still broken, for the first time in a long time, he felt hope.
He felt as if facing his demons was something he could do. And he wanted to overcome them. Not only for himself, but for Layla and the baby.
His life was changed. Irrevocably, forever changed. And that made him happy.
Chapter Sixteen
Layla took in a deep breath as she stared at the suitcase that Mrs. Braxton had loaned her. After getting back from the hospital and spending a few more days with James’s family, it was time to head back to New York.
Layla was sad. Sad to leave James’s family that was rapidly becoming her own. Sad to get back to the hustle and bustle of city life. And sad because there was so much about Honey Grove she was going to miss.
So much so that it was getting harder and harder to slip her clothes into the half-full suitcase.
Two arms wrapped around her waist. Layla giggled as James pulled her against him.
At least she had James. He was going with her, and if she were honest with herself, he was the one person she cared about being around.
“How’s it going, my lovely?” he asked as he buried his face into her neck.
Butterflies took flight in her stomach as she closed her eyes and allowed every sense, every nerve ending, to absorb James Braxton.
She tried not to protest when he pulled back. Taking this moment to turn around, Layla met his gaze as she stared up at him. “You have to stop doing that,” she said. Her voice was low and husky.
James raised his eyebrows. “Do what?” He leaned forward and pressed his lips to her nose. Then he kissed a trail across her cheek to her earlobe and then started making his way down her neck.
Layla leaned back, losing herself in how incredible it felt to be held by James. To be kissed by him.
In just a few short days, she’d fallen so incredibly in love with him that she couldn’t imagine her life without him. He was hers and she was his.
James laughed, breaking the tension in the room. He pulled back and pushed his hands through his hair. “And that’s where I’m going to stop,” he said, giving her a wink and then motioning toward the suitcase. “Almost done, my love?”
Her Protector: A Braxton Brothers Romance Page 14