“You can see the big dipper,” I pointed. She stood up from the swing and walked over to me, so close I could smell her. It took all my strength not to reach out and put my arm around her and pull her closer. Instead, I silently inhaled her sweet scent.
“It’s beautiful here,” she said. “I’d forgotten how peaceful it was.”
I nodded in agreement, remembering the short time we’d spent together here. It seemed like forever ago. My heart ached at the thought that I might never touch her again.
“Any word from Grace?” she asked, turning to me suddenly. “I can’t wait to go home. It’s beautiful and peaceful, but I’m bored to tears.”
“I’m sorry,” I muttered, shaking my head. “I haven’t heard anything.”
Grace and Ryder had left hours ago, headed North up the Five. As much as we all wanted to go back them up, they’d insisted on going alone, and leaving us on call, just in case Mona really had our property being watched.
“Julia seems to be enjoying herself,” I said.
“She sure is,” she agreed, rolling her eyes. “She’s in heaven.”
I nodded, again unsure what to say. There was so much to say, but nothing came out.
The creak of the front screen door sounded behind us and we turned to see Shadow and Wolfe walking out. A beer bottle dangled from Shadow’s hand, and Wolfe had a bottle of whiskey he took a huge slug off of.
“Hey guys, don’t drink too much, we may need to move if Ryder calls,” I said.
“We’re fine,” Shadow replied, shooting me a wary glance. “Just going for a walk.” They shuffled down the steps, heading for the dark trail off the side of the clubhouse.
“Can I go with you?” Libby said, suddenly.
I looked down at her in surprise, then looked at the two of them.
A huge grin spread across Shadow’s face and Wolfe nodded enthusiastically.
“Of course,” they said in unison.
Libby trotted down the steps quickly and I watched her go with a knot in my stomach. She’d said she was bored and I hadn’t made a move to entertain her in any way.
How far would she go to relieve her boredom?
Fuck.
If she hooked up with those two, I’d never forgive myself.
I needed to step up if I was going to prevent some serious mistakes from occurring.
You’re too different!
The little voice in my head wouldn’t let me forget it.
I sighed heavily as I turned to go back inside, cursing the little asshole in my head.
Opposites attract, prick.
CHAPTER TWENTY
GRACE
Ryder stood behind me as I stared at myself in the mirror. We’d checked into a hotel near the address Mona had given me so I could put on my disguise.
We were both nervous wrecks.
My hands trembled as I adjusted the black wig on my head.
“I still don’t like this,” he said.
“I know, babe,” I replied. I felt so bad for Ryder. He worried about me constantly. Lately, it seemed like it was more than usual. Our lifestyle only led to more and more situations like this and you’d think he’d get use to it, but that never seemed to happen.
We were well aware of the risks and dangers involved.
But this time, it was personal.
Our baby girl was all we could think about.
“I still think we should have gotten the cops involved this time,” he said.
“We’ll call them after. Let me get the baby, then when I give you the signal, you can call them and we’ll have Mona arrested again. I just need to be safe. I need to get Sadie first. I don’t want her anywhere near an arrest that could go awry in any number of ways.”
“I can’t wait to see that bitch behind bars,” he said. He rarely spoke like that, but I understood. Mona had caused us a lot of misery in the last year.
“Soon. But first, let’s concentrate on getting our baby back in our arms where she belongs.”
“I’m never letting the two of you out of my sight again,” he growled, his anger barely controlled. I’d hate to be around when he exploded. He’d been simmering in a low-burning rage for a while now.
“How do I look?” I asked.
“Hot, as usual,” he growled. “But I think I prefer your natural blonde.”
“That’s good, because so do I,” I replied, slipping on a pair of dark sunglasses. It was dark outside already, but I only had to fool Mona for a few minutes. “Ready to go get our girl?”
“That’s an understatement,” he said, brushing a kiss across my lips. “But goddammit, Grace, you’d better be careful.”
“I will, babe, don’t worry,” I said, my stomach churning. The truth of the matter is that Mona is entirely unstable.
Unpredictable.
Cunning and clever and more than a little bit evil and selfish.
There really was no telling what would happen once she realized I hadn’t brought Libby with me.
I took a deep breath and we headed to the door, our hearts pounding with blood-curdling fear.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
MONA
“Well, little one, I think you’re all packed up,” I said to Sadie, as she wiggled around on her back on the hotel bed. “I can’t believe how much stuff you need.”
My gaze raked over the pile of stuff on the bed. Even though I’d packed most of it up into the diaper bag, there was still so much left. Should I give it all to Grace?
“They probably won’t want any of it, will they?” I said. Sadie cooed in answer. “Yeah, they’ll have their own things. They spent nine months getting ready for you! I bet you have a beautiful nursery waiting for you back home.”
Deciding to just leave it all behind, I bundled up the baby and put her in the stroller.
“We had fun, didn’t we?” I said, as I grabbed my purse and headed for the door. “It’s time for you to go back to your parents, though. That’s where you belong. And in return, I’ll get my own girl back. It’s a win win, don’t you think?”
Her eyes were so big, staring up at me so trustingly. She was so vulnerable, so innocent. She could be hurt so easily.
It was unnerving, really. The damage I could do, if I wanted.
I prayed Grace didn’t give me any reason to hurt this little creature. She was perfect.
She just wasn’t mine.
Butterflies fluttered in my belly as I thought about the fact that I would get to see Libby in a few minutes, to talk to her, to finally have a decent amount of time to tell her my story, to explain why I’d done everything I’d done. I was sure once she heard all the details, she would understand.
Maybe, after some time, she would even grow to love me.
It’d been so very long since anyone really loved me, if they ever did. Maybe Zane, my old sidekick, but I didn’t really love him back, so that didn’t count.
Libby would understand, she had to.
I bundled the baby up into the Subaru and headed towards the restaurant I’d told Grace to meet me at, my heart pounding, my palms damp with anxiety.
“I love you, Libby,” I whispered, tears stinging my eyes.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
LIBBY
Shadow and Wolfe seemed like perfectly nice guys, even if it was obvious they were competing for my attention. I didn’t really want to go on a walk with them. I mainly wanted to get away from the excruciating tension between me and Bullet.
Everything was so easy in the beginning.
When I’d first met him in Mona’s basement, I was intimidated, but he quickly put me at ease, his kindness apparent as soon as we first talked. He was calm and gentle and warm.
We laughed. We laughed so much once we got out. In the hospital, we stayed up long nights just cracking each other up any way we could. He did a killer impression of Slade that left me gasping for air.
But now? He hadn’t cracked a smile since I’d arrived.
When he first showed up at the studio
, I’d stupidly thought maybe he was there to ask me if we could try again. But no. He was only doing his job.
I’d become a job to him now.
And yet, he still looked at me with those smoldering eyes that shot electricity straight to my center. Maybe I’m a fool for thinking he might still have feelings for me, despite the fact that I’d clearly been the one to push him away.
I had good reasons.
Or so I thought at the time.
Honestly, watching Julia soak up the attention of the other Gods left me wondering if we were all really all that different in the end.
Maybe I’d been wrong all along.
Maybe I’d pushed him away too soon, before I’d really given us time to sort things out.
Maybe, just maybe, I’d made the biggest mistake of my life.
Being around him, feeling the heat rolling off of him, sensing the chemistry between us, remembering the sensuality that flowed between us when we’d made love, it all just brought everything rushing back.
Everything I’d spent months trying to convince myself wasn’t real.
And now here I was, reality smacking me right in the heart.
Shadow and Wolfe led me down a dark trail through the woods, and the sounds of the forest sang out around us in stereo.
“Is it safe to be out here at night?” I asked. Neither of them had a flashlight, and yet they walked as confidently as if they had night vision. Both of them laughed at my question, which only served to annoy me.
“Maybe we should head back,” I said.
“We’re fine,” Wolfe said, with a dismissive wave.
A loud shriek pierced the darkness and I jumped like I’d been shot, right into Shadow’s arms. He wrapped his huge pythons around me, all while still laughing. Tears sprang to my eyes and I pushed him away, embarrassed.
“What the hell was that?” I asked, my voice shaking.
“Who knows?” he replied, winking at me. “But I sure hope they do it again.”
I rolled my eyes and turned back the way we came.
“I’m going back,” I said. “This is freaking me out too much.”
Leaving them behind, I hurried down the trail, my skin crawling with each noise that sounded out around me. I might have grown up in Oregon, but I was a true city girl. I didn’t mind camping or hiking, but as soon as night fell, I wanted to be tucked away safely in my tent, away from any wildlife that might decide I’d make a delicious meal.
The woods surrounding the clubhouse were as thick as it got here on the coast and I knew without a doubt they were filled with all kinds of hungry critters. I didn’t intend to provide them with nourishment.
Shadow and Wolfe’s footsteps fell behind me, which was comforting, despite the fact that I couldn’t wait to get away from them. We reached the edge of the woods and as soon as my feet hit the gravel of the winding driveway that led back to the clubhouse, I let out a huge sigh of relief.
“Sorry about that, Libby,” Wolfe said as they caught up. He looked genuinely regretful and my heart softened. “We didn’t mean to scare you.”
“It’s okay,” I said. “I’m just a little on edge, I guess.”
“Of course, you are,” Shadow said. “Let’s get you back to Bullet. He’s probably crawling out of his skin by now.”
“What?” I asked. “Why do you say that?”
“Um, have you seen the way he looks at you?”
“Well, I mean, yeah, we had a little something, but that was months ago. I think he’s over it.”
Wolfe scoffed and shook his head, “Hardly.”
“Yeah, he’s constantly looking at your Facebook pictures on his phone.”
“He is?” I asked, my heart skipping a beat.
“Oh, yeah, he’s been pining for you,” Wolfe said. “Don’t tell him we said that or he’ll kick our asses.”
“My lips are sealed,” I said.
“Why’d you blow him off?” Shadow asked.
“I didn’t, I —.”
I stopped. Yes, I did.
“I just thought we were a little too different, I guess,” I admitted.
“Yeah,” Shadow said. “I can see that. Lots of people have successful relationships with people they are completely different than, though. God, look at Slade and Diana. You can’t get more different than that. You just never know.”
Wise words coming from a big, beautiful, biker, I thought.
I nodded, drinking them in. Maybe they weren’t so bad after all?
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I said.
“You should,” Shadow said. “He’s been a mess lately.”
We walked the rest of the way back to the clubhouse in silence.
They’d certainly given me a lot to think about.
Perhaps I was wrong about Bullet, after all.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
BULLET
When I saw Libby come back after just a few minutes alone with Shadow and Wolfe, I breathed a silent sigh of relief. I caught Shadow’s eye and he winked at me, then glanced at Libby and looked back at me again.
He knew how I felt about her. We’d talked about it at length.
I knew what his look meant. He was telling me to get off my ass and do something before I lose the best thing that ever happened to me. I knew this because I’d been telling myself that same thing for quite a while.
“Back so soon?” I asked, trying to sound as unaffected as possible.
“It’s really dark once you get deep in there,” she said.
I nodded, seeing my chance. “It’s actually amazing if you have a flashlight,” I said. I picked one up from the table on the porch, and smiled at her. “Come on, let’s give it another try. There’s something I want to show you anyway.”
She looked at me skeptically, but I just smiled wider, trying to make up for my awkwardness from earlier. I felt Shadow and Wolfe watching from the sidelines, and I ignored the smirks that I knew would be plastered to their mugs.
“You’ll love it,” I said. “I wanted to show you…before.”
Before you left me.
Before you decided I wasn’t right for you.
Before…when everything was easy and right.
“Okay,” she murmured, falling in step with me. I clicked on the flashlight and a powerful stream of light lit up everything around us.
“Better?”
“Much!” she said, smiling slightly.
“We aren’t going far, but it’s really special,” I said.
“Okay,” she said. “Do you spend a lot of time in the woods at night?”
I laughed. “Yeah, I guess I do.”
We disappeared through the tree line and were immediately transported to another dimension. Surrounded by the tall, swaying pines, the muffled sounds of the party at the clubhouse fell away and it was just us.
And about a million unseen critters, but who’s counting?
I reached out and silently took her hand, smiling at the eagerness with which she wrapped her fingers around mine. Leaves and twigs crunched under our feet, breaking through the forest’s night song as we made our way down the trail. The tops of the trees blocked out the moonlight, the light from the flashlight the only source of illumination.
After a few minutes, the trail broke through a small clearing into a tiny little circular meadow, with my favorite creek rushing along the curve of one side of it. I turned off the flashlight and we walked into the meadow.
Moonlight washed over us, bathing us in its warm light. I watched with a swelling heart as Libby rushed into the center of the grass, spinning around in a circle, her head thrown back in ecstasy as a huge smile spread across her face.
“This is glorious, Bullet!” she cried.
I nodded, a lump in my throat.
She was glorious! I watched her dance around, an angelic vision I knew I’d never forget.
In fact, if death struck me now, I’d die a happy man.
“Come over here,” I said, my voice thick with rapidly grow
ing desire. I led her over to the rushing creek. “Look at the water.”
She cried out, her eyes widening. “It’s beautiful!”
Shimmering in the moonlight, the shallow water rushed over the rocks dramatically. It looked completely different than it did during the day, the darkness that surrounded it lending an eerie beauty to the water, making it appear black and sparkling, all at the same time. The contrast of the white foam that the rushing water formed around the rocks was mesmerizing.
“I’m so glad you brought me here,” Libby said, her gaze turning up to me.
“I love it here,” I said. “It’s my favorite place on the entire property. Especially at night. It looks like the water is made from the moonlight itself.”
Her eyes dilated and I stared down at her beauty, my heart bursting with love for her. I longed to pull her into my arms, to hold her close and never let her go. I’d missed her for months and now that she was in front of me, smiling up at me with such loving, joyful eyes, I’d never wanted to kiss her more than this moment.
I smiled down at her and the pull was just too strong.
I bent my head, bringing my lips inches from hers.
“Bullet,” she whispered, placing her hand on my chest, “we need to talk.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
LIBBY
He was going to kiss me, I knew it.
Of course, I ruined it.
With words. And not just any words, but the words every man hates to hear: “We need to talk.”
He blinked, took a step back, and respectfully nodded.
“Alright,” he said, his voice cracking.
“I feel terrible,” I said, the words rushing out. “I owe you an explanation for my behavior, for not returning your calls.”
“You don’t owe me anything, Libby.”
His eyes smoldered, sprinkled with moonlight, searching mine.
“But I do,” I said, sighing heavily. “I guess…I guess, I just thought we were both so different. When we were at Mona’s, and then the hospital, it was just us, you know? But once you came back here, I saw that this is where you fit. This is your tribe, your people. You belong here, Bullet. You’re a God!”
Gods of Chaos MC Box Set 4 Page 21