“Meita means daughter. Imants is asking if you’re his daughter.” A collective murmur rushed through the crowd behind them. He pursed his lips and frowned at Sarma then looked back at Imants. “She doesn’t speak Latvian. Do you know Sarma?”
Imants stepped forward again. Grasped her upper arms. “So many years have gone by, I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t recognize you. But I’d never forget you. Sarma, I’m your father.”
Chapter 6
“My father committed suicide. There’s no way you are who you say.” Sarma rocked in the chair she sat on. Adrenaline pumped through her body, leaving her weak and tired. The knot at the base of her shoulder throbbed. She glanced around the living room in Imants’ home.
Reinis sucked on his bottom lip and stared at Imants. Ako leaned back on the leather couch, arms crossed, with a glare like he wanted to throw Imants through a window.
“I did not commit suicide. That’s what your mother told you to hide the facts. But believe me, I never wanted things to turn out this way,” Imants answered in English. He stood against a walnut carved, ceiling-to-floor bookshelf and looked down at Sarma.
If she weren’t in such a sour mood, she might enjoy Imants’ elegant home. Oak floors, leather and hardwood furniture, with crystal scones lighting the room. “You were there one day, gone the next. So, I was always part vampire and I didn’t know it? And you, Ako, are my half-brother?” Sarma sat across from Imants and Ako at the homestead where they lived in Brodi, a village close to Jekabpils. “How could I have not known? I never felt anything. Not one craving for blood, not one sense…”
Imants clasped his hands in front of him and pushed himself away from the shelf. “There’s so much to explain. Ako didn’t know anything. I never told anyone about you, but he was there at the party, so I want him to finally hear this. Ako’s mother and I were an arranged marriage and…things never worked out, so we separated. We were split up for over ten years when I traveled to the United States, met Gunita, and had you, Sarma. But relationships between vampires and humans have always been forbidden. You were a secret, Sarma. No one ever knew about you.”
“You had another child with someone else? What about my mother? My brother and sisters?” Ako shot up from the couch and slammed a fist onto a glass coffee table, sending shards across the room.
Sarma shirked. “Be careful. There’s a baby in the room.”
“Ako, get ahold of yourself. Vampires control their emotions. That was dangerous,” Imants scolded him.
Ako’s chest heaved and he took a step back.
“You have sisters and a brother?” Nausea slammed her. Her sight blurred. Their words twisted in her mind like hot metal. She shot a glance toward the corner of the room where Auseklis slept, hoping he wouldn’t wake.
Siblings? A f—she covered her mouth that had soured and couldn’t think the word. Couldn’t say family. Imants wasn’t family. He was a hit and run sperm donor like Reinis except she was a “wasn’t supposed to be.” Not even a child born from duty. A child doomed to darkness, and now maybe her son followed in her footsteps in a different way.
“Ako, there’s a lot you don’t know. A lot I have to explain. Things you’re going to hear but wish you hadn’t.”
“Damn right, you have a lot to explain,” Ako growled.
“Take a deep breath. You need to stay calm. Laura and I hadn’t been together for ten years when I got with Gunita.” Imants gestured for him to sit.
“She was still my mother.” Ako sat and jammed his hands into his jean jacket pockets.
Imants sighed and looked up at the ceiling.
“So Sarma was half vampire? How can that be? And why didn’t we know?” Reinis asked.
“Unless there’s another Gunita Liepa, yes, Sarma was always halfblooded.”
Sarma chewed her upper lip and searched her mind. How could she have missed it?
Reinis clasped her hand. “Strange. Explains a lot. Since I met her, Sarma always had more grace than humans, a beauty and glow to her that was beyond what I could understand. Besides, she transitioned so well, we were amazed. Very little second effects. But I still don’t understand it.”
“So that’s why I sensed no human in you? You were converted? When I spotted you early on in the party, a part of me believed it could be you, but as I felt no human presence, I denied it until you—”
“I had no extra senses. Zero vampire abilities or cravings for blood. How do I know you’re not lying? There’s no reason for me to believe you,” she retorted. “And how could I not know that I was a half-blood my entire life?”
Ako interlaced his fingers into a huge fist.
“Good question. I’m not sure. I’ve never run into this situation before. I don’t think any half-bloods have ever been converted, so I have the same questions. But I can share details about our life.”
Our life? What our life? She almost blurted. Sarma wasn’t sure she wanted to hear them. Still, how could she not? What the hell was happening?
Without a response, Imants started in. “When you were a little girl, we lived in San Francisco, in Noe Valley. Try to remember the games we used to play. I used to ask you ‘Do you hear that?’ ‘Do you see that?’ Things that only vampires could sense. At night, we would wander the streets and I would train your abilities, listening to sounds that were far off or spotting animals in Golden Gate Park.”
Sarma closed her eyes and she tried to recall anything he mentioned. Her mother and she did live in Noe Valley before moving to Penngrove. There was no way he would know that. She didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know how to feel.
“What else?” Sarma croaked.
“Next door, there lived a woman named Margie. You used to finger-paint with her. Sarma, I tried to develop your senses. I knew the human genes dulled them.” He folded his lips in and glanced at the broken coffee table as if he would say something else but decided against it. “But you had the traits. We used to play find the ocean. We would walk all night sniffing the air until we reached Ocean Beach. Though you were little, your legs were strong and agile. You could find all sorts of things your mother lost by sniffing them out.”
Sarma shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut. Her face flushed and a tear rolled down her cheek. This couldn’t be happening. “Why can’t I remember a thing? You know things about me. I believe you that you’re my…don’t know what to call you, but I see you’re who you say you are. But I just can’t…I can’t remember anything.”
Sarma hit every syllable of the word. She drew in a breath, and when she paused, everyone remained quiet. Ako scowled at her. None of it was her fault. Yet, she couldn’t blame his anger. She didn’t feel angry. She didn’t feel anything. Only the tear that rolled down her face expressed emotion, but inside, ice covered her heart.
“Everything changed when we moved to Penngrove. My mom never spoke Latvian to me after that, never talked to me about you, always insisted, and even begged me never to come to Latvia. She even forbade me to visit here. I never knew why. There was so much she hid.” Sarma twisted her neck toward her shoulder, squeezed her eyes shut, and let the tears drip down her chin onto her lap.
“She’s been through enough. Please. This can wait.” Reinis stood. He draped her shawl over her shoulders and wrapped his arms around her, kissing the crown of her head.
Sarma’s insides shivered. She absorbed the calm Reinis sent her through the imprint. She needed Laima’s care. They needed to get back to Liepāja. Nursing had been difficult, and she wished her mother-in-law were near with one of her teas. Reinis guided her to the bed in the guest room and laid her down, covering her with a blanket. Sarma turned onto her side and allowed Reinis to comb and braid her hair. His touch eased her trembling body. She had a father. She always wanted one. Now she had one but didn’t want to keep him.
Chapter 7
Sarma’s stomach hurt. She sat at the table in her dining room in Nica, waiting for her mom to answer the video call. She hadn’t spoken with her moth
er in nine months, which was nothing new, but it was the longest they’d gone with no communication. And Gunita knew nothing about what had happened to her. Didn’t know Sarma was a vampire.
Gunita’s face popped up on the screen. She blinked her eyes and moved closer to the webcam making her face grow on the screen. “Sarma? Where are you?”
“The place you never wanted me to go. Latvia.” Sarma pulled her shawl tighter around her arms.
Gunita bowed her head, covering her eyes with one hand. “I know what you’re involved in. I don’t know how far and I don’t want to know. I’ve been aware of it for months.”
“You know? How? What do you know?” Now she wanted to throw up.
“I knew it! You changed after you returned from Latvia. I read it on your face clear as day. I suspected you were involved in things I never, ever wanted you to know about. Tell me I’m wrong, Sarma. Please, I’m begging you to tell me I’m wrong. I warned you never to go to that horrid place.”
Sarma’s thoughts spun like a top. Gunita had asked what was amiss with her one day after she met Reinis. Pointed out that Sarma was changed. The look of fear had been transparent on Gunita’s face. That happened before Sarma found out Reinis had imprinted her.
“I remember the conversation but you never clarified. You never told me your reasons for why you said I looked different. Why you never, ever wanted me to visit our homeland. So how can you expect me to do what you say?” Sarma curled her fingers around her closed fist and set it on the table in front of her laptop.
“Some things are better left as secrets. Better left alone.” Gunita’s gaze faded into a distant stare.
“What did you see in me that night?” Did Gunita know she was a full-blood vampire now?
“I need to go.” Gunita sank her head down.
“Mother, my whole life has been buried in secrets and you won’t let me in on them. I need your help. Don’t you want to help me understand?” Sarma grasped the side of the screen as if it were her mother’s arm.
Gunita lifted her head off her chest. Tears rolled down her cheeks. Something wasn’t right with her mother. Gunita had rings under her eyes and her gray roots showed through the dark brown she usually dyed her hair. “Don’t make me tell you, Sarma. You won’t be able to handle it. I couldn’t handle it. I nearly went off the deep end. All this time you’ve been gone, I tried to tell myself it wasn’t true.”
Sarma’s insides trembled. Did her mom know or not? “Mate, please tell, me. Please.” Sarma begged her mom, calling her mother in Latvian.
Gunita stood and for a moment Sarma couldn’t see her on the screen. Sarma’s shoulder pinched and her stomach somersaulted. In the background stood her mother’s bookshelves, coffee table, and plants—her apartment in San Francisco where she lived. The call hadn’t cut off, yet it seemed she left the room. Then, Gunita’s face re-appeared.
“When I saw you that day, after you came home from your vacation with Marita, your eyes and skin had a glow, like you were in love. With something more powerful. Something I had only seen in one other person.”
Sarma sat forward in her chair. Her palms had dampened against the table’s hard wood. What would Gunita say?
“I knew you were imprinted. And an imprint could mean only one thing, Sarma. There’s only one species that imprints. Vampires.” Gunita’s voice dipped so low, Sarma wasn’t sure she heard her right. Gunita sucked in a deep breath and pressed her temples with her fingers.
She shifted her hands up to her arms and gripped them until her knuckles turned white. The whole thing was true then. “You know about vampires and imprints?”
“Isn’t that what I said? And clearly now you do too. Tell me, did you find a coven in Latvia? I told you nothing good would ever come of it.” Gunita buried her face in her shaking hands again. “So it’s true, you were imprinted?”
“Mom, you know about vampires, so does that mean you know what I am?” Sarma repeated as her stomach leapt into her throat. Bitterness washed into her mouth.
Gunita lifted her hands off her face. She ran fingers through her hair and yanked on the wiry ends.
“Stop, Mom, please. I can handle the truth. I’m stronger than you think.” Her mother didn’t seem to recognize that Sarma was a full blood now. “Please, calm down.”
“You don’t understand, Sarma. This isn’t as simple as you think.”
“Yes or no. Have you known my entire life that I was half vampire?” Sarma spat the words out in the open. Her mother’s lagging was worse than knowing. Like the anticipation of an injection. The wait was worse than the prick.
“Yes, damn it. I knew. And I never, ever wanted you to find out because vampires are monsters. They suck blood and prey on humans. I never wanted you to know you were half a monster.” Tears gushed from her eyes again. She bent over, grabbing her waist, quaking with sobs.
The words wrenched Sarma’s stomach and for a moment, she couldn’t breathe. She grasped her chest and cleared her throat, but no air entered her mouth. That’s how she felt about herself. A monster. She’d become a beast. Just as her mother said. Her mother’s anguish drove her self-hatred in further. She’d never be able to feed her son.
For a brief moment, Sarma closed her eyes and quieted her mind. For the first time in forever, she wanted to hug her mom, to alleviate her pain. “How did you hide it all from me? I don’t remember so many things.”
“Of course, you don’t. You want to know the truth?” Her mom’s tone pierced into high-pitch squeals through her cries.
“Tell me. I need to know.” Even if she died from knowing, she had to understand her life’s secrets.
This got worse each time Gunita answered questions but Sarma couldn’t resist. Finally, Gunita revealed secrets. “What’s my father’s name?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know? Wait a second. What are you planning? So you can, so you can—never mind!”
“So I can what?” She leaned forward again.
Gunita shook her head and averted her eyes. Did Gunita know her father was alive? She couldn’t bring herself to ask.
Instead, Sarma jutted her hand into the air like she was slicing it. “Just answer one more question. How did you know I was imprinted? How?”
Her mom wiped her eyes with a tissue and blew her nose.
“Because I was imprinted too!”
Chapter 8
Gunita grumbled as she hoisted the suitcase onto the bed, her body sore from the long, almost direct flight she’d taken. She hoped the expensive Dome Hotel would be worth the cost. She hadn’t been in Latvia for over twenty years so staying in Old Riga would be a good idea. The last time here, she’d forced Imants to meet her so she could lock him out of her life for good by giving up the imprint.
Though exhausted, she ironed her entire wardrobe and hung up everything in the closet. Wrinkled clothes were a no-go, no matter what. She did a once over in the room, locking the door and windows. Outside, Old Riga’s sparkling lights greeted her against the starry sky, but it only served to remind her to stay in. Those disgusting beast vampires roamed the streets at night.
All those poor humans who had no idea hit the cobblestone streets in droves, frequenting the many bars and clubs. Not her. The fact they could go out during the day was bad enough, but nighttime remained their hour of power. For years, she always rushed home at dusk.
She yanked the curtains closed. Imants had ruined every aspect of her life and she intended to make him pay. But how? She had no idea how to get to him. How to find him and how she could overpower him. When she saw Sarma on the computer screen, rage flared in her blood. Made her want to pick up the computer and throw it across the room. If he’d disclosed the fact that he was a vampire before Sarma was born, she never would have stayed with him. Bastard stole every last crumb of happiness from her life.
After a quick shower, she changed into her pajamas and opened the fridge to look through the mini-bar. She found tiny bottles of vodka, brandy, and whiskey, and a couple of sampl
e beers. Coming back to Latvia would likely turn out to be a bad plan. Nothing ever went her way, and if she managed to find Imants, she had no idea what she would do or say.
She cracked open the bottle of brandy, downed it, then did the same with the whiskey. The whole plan really was delusional. But Sarma had become involved in the life she’d desperately tried to keep her safe from. She wished she had a bigger bottle of brandy. Still, the sample took the edge off her anger and made her relax. She pulled back the covers and fell asleep.
Gunita woke with a dull ache in her neck and head. She’d slept awkwardly on the overly fluffy hotel pillow. Besides, with the awful jet lag, she’d woken at five and couldn’t go back to sleep. She dressed in warm clothes, gathered her things, and slumped down the stairs. To one side sat the hotel dining area but she couldn’t bring herself to eat. She should, but her stomach was raw after traveling and a rotten night’s rest.
Through the double oak-carved doors, streets spread before her that she used to find romantic. Now old memories pinged her like pebbles stinging her skin. Autumn air chilled her cheeks, tightening them and raising goose bumps over her skin. She forgot how cool October weather was in Riga.
On all sides of the spacious Dome Square, an ancient church and a stone-faced building jutted out. She wandered through Old Riga and viewed some of the places she’d forgotten. Down Rātslaukums Street she stared at the House of Blackhead, an ancient Gothic structure that made chills run down her spine.
The place she’d first kissed Imants before she discovered how horrible he was. The imposing guild towered above the cobbled road. White squares lined the red brick façade. Other people would find it elegant with the stylized edge of the triangular roof. Not her. Her mouth turned with a bitter flavor.
Evil idiot Imants had swept her off her feet and brought her here after they’d met in the Latvian Hall in San Francisco. He came to see her in a play she performed in. How was she supposed to know he was a vampire? Never would she believe such a thing until she’d seen it for herself.
Darkness Born: Paranormal Vampire Romance (Immortal Desire Series Book 1.5) Page 4