“Hey. Thanks for picking up. Sorry for the random call, but there’s something kind of crazy I need to tell you, and it’s going to be awkward.”
“You’re sleeping with my brother.”
I feel my mouth drop open. “What?!” Is the only thing I can manage to say.
“Blake told me the other day, so no need for any details. I’m cool with it. I’m glad you guys are happy and in love and all that shit.” He laughs, and I can picture the face he’s making, the way his eyes crinkle so tight.
“I’m sorry, in love? No. It’s just a—well, I don’t know exactly, but he travels and I’m working.” I start rambling and try to play it off, but why the hell did he throw out the word love? “Wait, what did Blake say about me?” I ask, suddenly feeling a bit childish.
“No, nope. I’m not playing this game with you two. You guys need to figure out your own shit. Keep me out of it. I don’t want details!”
“Oh relax! Fine,” I huff. “I’ll let you go then, since you’re already filled in. Oh, when did he say he’s coming back to Grand Lake? I pissed him off and he took off without telling me.”
“Doesn’t take much to ruffle that old man’s feathers. He’ll be back tomorrow night.”
“Thanks, Trev. I’m sorry this is so weird.”
He pauses briefly on the other end. “Honestly, it’s pretty great. You’d be my sister, and I’d love to see Blake happy again. Just hope you two can make it work. Talk soon.”
He hangs up, and I look down at my phone, pulling open the notes section to make my checklist for what I’ll need to surprise Blake.
Wine. Candles. Rose petals. Lingerie. Something fancy to cook. I need Delilah’s help with that one.
The next morning, I head over to the cabins, stopping to pick up some fresh muffins and coffee for Mrs. Winthrop and me.
“Good morning, Mrs. W,” I say, balancing the coffee and muffins as I let my bag slide off my shoulder to the floor.
“Oh, let me help you with that, dear. And call me Adele. You’re practically my daughter, you know.” Over the years, she’s always insisted I call her by her first name, but my parents wouldn’t allow it. I guess it’s just a habit now.
“Bookings still coming in steadily?” I ask as we each grab a muffin.
“Yes, I was just telling your mama about how amazing you are. I ran into her at the market yesterday. She looked well.”
“Yeah, she’s doing great, actually. Her back was bothering her a while back, and I finally talked her into going to see a specialist in Boulder. He gave her some steroid shots, and she’s back to feeling like she’s thirty again, according to her. What about you? How are you doing?”
Her eyes are still bright, and she’s still fiery as ever, but I worry about Mrs. W. She’s not getting any younger, and when her husband passed away several years ago, it was a lot for her to take on this business by herself.
“Oh, don’t you worry about me. I’m still feisty,” she says with a wink. “Besides, Blake has been such a help lately. I’m going to miss having him around every day. I always worry when he travels.”
I nod, not wanting to give too much away. “Yeah, that has to be hard.”
“You sure you won’t miss having him around too?”
I feel my cheeks heat up instantly. “Uh, I mean.”
She can’t hold back her laughter any longer. “You kids think because I’m old, you’ve got me fooled? I see the way you two look at each other.” She taps her nose and I just shake my head. "I won’t pry, but just know I haven’t seen Blake this happy in, well, forever. Just be good to each other and be honest, and you’ll figure it out.”
Adele doesn’t say anything else about the matter as we launch into our workday. Why does everyone seem to think it’s so easy? We’ll just “figure it out,” whatever the hell that means.
It’s nearing three o’clock when I finish up my day, and I make a beeline to The Place to get some help from Delilah on romantic dinner ideas.
“What do you both like?” She asks as she looks through the invoices on her desk.
“Um, food? Oh, I know he said he loves white wine sauce!”
“Perfect. Make chicken marsala. I’ll lay out some ingredients on the counter for you. Just look up the recipe online. It’s not difficult.”
I give her a big hug. “You’re a lifesaver!”
I gather up the ingredients and wine and jump in my bug. I don’t have actual lingerie, and the only place in town to get it is Martha’s boutique. The last thing I need is the tongues wagging of a bunch of townspeople, so the red lace bra and panty set I bought on a whim over a year ago and never wore will have to do.
I stop by my mom’s house to check in on her and tell her I’d be out all night. I’m a grown woman and my mom doesn’t tend to worry, but just in case, I wanted her to know I’d be somewhere safe. I feel like I’m lying to her because I know she assumes I’m out with Jade. On the way out of the house, I stop by one of the rose bushes and pull a few flowers from their stems.
It’s nearing seven thirty when I set the plates on the table and light the candles. I sprinkle rose petals from the kitchen to the bedroom where I’ve lit a few more candles. Dinner is done, and I’ve placed it in the oven to keep warm.
I can’t believe I’m actually going through with this. I look myself over in the bathroom mirror once more. I almost don’t recognize the wanton woman staring back at me. I’ve curled and fluffed my hair and slicked on a red lipstick the same color as my bra and panties. I see lights shine across the front of the living room and scurry back to the bedroom.
I lay myself provocatively across his bed and wait for him to enter. My heart feels like it’s about to beat out of my chest when I hear his keys in the front door. Suddenly, it hits me. I hope he’s not upset I used one of the spare keys to his cabin from the front office to let myself in. I push the thought away as butterflies dance in my stomach.
The front door closes, and I hear him take a few steps into the house—before I hear a woman’s voice.
Oh my god, Blakey. Is this for me?”
“Uh…” I can hear the confusion in his voice.
Blakey? Who the hell? Before I can scramble off the bed and grab something to cover myself, Blake is flipping on the light switch. I catch myself as I trip over the edge of the comforter and stand up to see Tracey standing behind him with her hands on his waist.
Her smile fades when she sees me and realizes that this is, in fact, not something Blakey did for her.
“Pearl, wait. Wait!” He says as I push my way past them, grabbing my clothes and sprinting out to my car. I don’t even care that I’m half naked or that I stubbed my toe so hard it’s bleeding. I just want to get the hell out of there.
Fourteen
Blake
“Pearl!” I run out the front door after her, but it’s too late. She throws her car in reverse, and I have to jump out of the way to avoid getting hit. To say she’s pissed is an understatement.
I walk back up the porch and slam the door behind me. I want to punch the damn wall. I told Tracey I didn’t want to talk or see her, but she called me on my back to town and said she’s waiting for me at the cabins.
“Are you going to explain to me what the hell just happened, Blake Winthrop?” She asks in her grating, nasal tone. Why did I never notice that before? She crosses her arms, and her eyes pierce through me like daggers. Her overly perky fake tits practically spill out of her top.
I’m about to grab a beer when I realize that this calls for something stronger. I pull a tumbler down from the cabinet and fill it three quarters of the way with whiskey. I take several large gulps before I turn to face Tracey.
“No. What the hell did you want to talk to me about?” I lean against the counter, refusing to give her an inch.
“Can we at least sit down like civilized adults?” She says, gesturing toward the couch.
I stay where I’m at, and she lets out an over dramatic sigh and flops herself down. “Lo
ok, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately and soul searching and growing. I feel like I needed to take the time away from you and us to find myself and to really grow into who I am as a person to realize what I had.” She bats her eyes at me, a trick that would have worked in the past.
“So what are you saying?” I ask, unfazed.
“Blakey, please. I miss you,” she says as she walks over to me, resting her arms on mine. “You know we were amazing together. I…I love you so much. I don’t want anyone else.”
Odds are the latest guy dumped her, and she thinks I’ll always be around to take her back. I think about Pearl, about how she must be feeling and what she must be thinking right now.
“I can’t do this, Tracey. I got over you after you left. I have no interest in pursuing anything with you again.” I step out of her grasp and set the tumbler on the counter.
I walk over to the front door, but she’s still standing in the kitchen with a look of shock on her face. “Please leave, Tracey.” I open the door.
“Seriously? You’re throwing us away for that girl? That child? You really are something else,” she shouts as she stomps out the door.
“You threw us away the day you left me with a damn note, Tracey. Pearl is twice the woman you are.”
She spins on her heel to snap back, but I shut the door in her face. I pull out my phone to call Pearl, but I don’t know if it’s the right thing to do. I walk over and pour more whiskey in my glass and sink down to the kitchen floor. By the time I think over whether I should call her or not, I’ve polished off the whiskey and I’m falling asleep on the floor.
By the time I wake, the sun is piercing through the curtains, and my head feels like it got ran over by a freight train. I blink as I sit up and feel like I might throw up. I make my way to the bathroom just in time before I throw up what’s left in my stomach from the night before.
I stand in the shower for an extra few minutes, trying to decide what I’m going to say to Pearl. Obviously, I need to apologize to her and explain the situation, but I’m guessing that won’t just make it go away. I should have listened to Trevor when he told me to tell Pearl that Tracey had called.
I knock softly on the front door of Pearl’s house. Maybe I don’t want her to be home. I don’t want to see the look on her face, the look she had last night. Her eyes were so full of sorrow and shock, like she couldn’t believe I’d betrayed her.
I lift my hand to knock again when the door slowly opens. “Hello, Mrs. Davenport. Is Pearl home?”
She smiles and the skin around her eyes creases. “Ah, I’ve been waiting for someone to stop by,” she says softly as she steps aside. “Come on in, Blake. She’s in her room, down the hall to the left.”
I start to head down the hall when I turn around. “Is it that bad?”
She takes a sip of her coffee. “I’m not sure what is going between the two of you or what you did, but I can tell you she doesn’t get this upset if she doesn’t care a whole lot. Just get yourself in there, son, and make it right.”
I smile and nod. I haven’t had a lot of interaction with Mrs. Davenport, but she’s always been a straight shooter. Back when her husband became bedbound, I stopped by the house and helped take care of things on and off. I’d sit with Mr. Davenport, and he’d tell me stories about how the two of them met when they were eleven and he from that moment she was the love of his life.
I knock on Pearl’s bedroom door before slowly opening it. Her back is to the door, and she’s folding a pile of clothes on her bed. “Mom, I told you I don’t want any tea. It’s not going to make anything better.”
I take a moment to glance around the room. I don’t know what I was expecting, but her room is different than what I imagined. I was picturing what it would look like when she was a kid, with Star Wars posters and glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. This room is all clean lines with touches of soft rose and white.
I clear my throat, and she drops the item in her hand and whips her head around. “What the hell are you doing here?” Gone is the sadness and hurt in her eyes, and it’s instantly filled with anger and rage.
I raise my hands in a symbol of submission. “Pearl, please just let me explain.”
“Explain what? That you’re a liar and a cheater? Or that I was just a pathetic joke to you?” She’s trying to be stoic, but her bottom lip quivers and a tear tumbles down her cheek. I want to reach out and wipe it away, but she wipes at it with the back of her hand before spinning back around to face the pile of clothes.
“You were never a pathetic joke to me. I didn’t sleep with her, Pearl, I swear! Listen. The night of the barn dance, Tracey called me. She said she wanted to meet and talk, and I told her I wasn’t interested. I left it at that, and I thought she did too. I had no idea she would be waiting for me when I got home from Durango, I swear.” I reach out and grab her hand. “Please, Pearl. You’re the only woman I want.”
She doesn’t respond. She just continues to fold clothes and put them into…a suitcase?
“Where are you going?” I ask, swallowing down the lump of fear that’s just formed in my throat.
“Chicago. I have a job opportunity there,” she says coldly.
“You’re leaving? I don’t understand. What about…What about us?”
“Us? There is no ‘us’, Blake. You said it before. We both agreed we were just wasting time till you had to leave. You were the one leaving first, not me, so don’t throw that double standard at me.”
“You just love pointing that finger at me, don’t you? So this is it, huh? You’re running back to Trevor. I knew you still loved him, so don’t you dare say I was the one wasting time here! I fell in love with you, Pearl.” I hate that I’m yelling, but I’m hurt. I thought I meant more to her.
She throws a shirt down on the bed, and her face is a shade of red I’ve never seen. “You love me? You wait till now to tell me? You’ve had weeks, but you were too scared because you love to hide behind your failed relationship. You use it as a crutch, you let it define you. Same with the football situation. At the end of the day, you’re too scared to actually say how you feel or what you want, you just continue to run away.”
“You’re the one running away! I have a company and commitments I made months ago, Pearl. Don’t act like you’re not running away from your feelings too. You’ve been hiding behind your feelings for Trevor with this whole thing. You know you love me.”
“I’m not, Blake. Besides, you can’t have it both ways, one minute I’m still in love with Trevor, and the next, I love you? Get this through your head. I don’t have feelings in this. Like you said, we agreed to have fun and enjoy it while it lasted. Clearly, we want different things. I appreciate your apology, but if you could please leave, I need to finish packing.”
The look in her eyes is so cold, and her jaw is stiff and unwavering. It feels like a million daggers just plunged into my heart, and I can’t believe how much this hurts. How did she manage to worm her way into my heart and life so deeply and so quickly? I don’t even know how long I stand there, but my heartache quickly morphs into anger, and I say the only thing I can think of that will save my dignity.
“Good luck with Trevor. At least you kept it in the family.” I turn and slam the bedroom door, not stopping to say goodbye to her mother as I storm out of the house and get in my truck and drive.
Is she going there to be with Trevor? There’s no way he’d do that to me. I know my feelings are fucked up right now, but nothing makes sense. I don’t know where I’m going, but I don’t want to think or feel. I blast the radio and roll the windows down. I need to hit the road by Sunday morning to get to the build site and be ready to break ground on Monday, but to hell with that. I’ll head up early. I have no reason to stick around here anymore.
Fifteen
Pearl
It’s been one long miserable two weeks. I’ve done nothing but cry in bed, walk to the kitchen to eat a pint of ice cream, cry in the shower, in the tub, and in my car righ
t now at The Place.
I pull down the visor and flip open the mirror, patting beneath my eyes to dry the tears and wipe away any smudged mascara. I take a few deep breaths and close my eyes, willing myself to get it together before I go inside to meet Jade.
“Heeeey!” I say with the fakest amount of happiness I can muster. I give her a hug before taking a seat on the stool next to her.
“So, how are you doing?” She gives me that head tilt, the damn head tilt everyone always does when they see you as a fragile mess. In her defense, she isn’t wrong.
“I’m actually really good.” I can hear how high my voice is, and I know she’s going to call me on my bullshit. “I...okay, I’m not great. Jade, I don’t know what to do.”
“Oh, sweetie. I wish I knew what to say. Tell me what’s going on.”
“Well, the interview went well in Chicago. They called yesterday and offered me the job. The pay is amazing, the office is gorgeous, and they’d pay to relocate me.”
“But?” She knows me too well.
“Chicago is beautiful, but my God, it’s so big. I missed it here when I was there. I had a great time catching up with Trevor and meeting his fiancée. They worked things out and are doing great. He and I went out for a drink, and I explained it all to him. He wasn’t much help,” I say, thanking Will for my beer and taking a long drink.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, he basically told me I’m in love with Blake and that’s the problem.”
“Are you?”
I can feel the tears spring up, “Yes,” I say as I let my head hang and the tears start to flow.
“Oh, Pearl. Why are you sad about it?” She asks, rubbing my back.
“Because I ruined it, Jade! You should have heard how mean I was to him! He hates me now.” I wipe away the snot from my nose. I know I must look like one helluva hot mess.
“I can pretty much guarandamntee you that man is up in Montana feeling the same way you are right now. I bet you anything he feels hurt and broken and confused. Imagine the look on his face if you showed up there.”
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