by Jaime Lewis
He saw the faint smile on her face, and that made him smile. He wiped the remaining tears from her face, leaving her with a red nose.
“Now, if you think for one minute that everything you’ve shared with me will make me want to drop you, you’ve got another thing coming, baby. Your honesty and willingness to share your experiences humble me. I’m here now and promise you I will be here tomorrow when you wake up next to me.” He leaned forward and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. “Now, I want you to finish telling me the rest, and you’d better not leave anything out.” He saw her gulp, and he wondered how much worse it could get.
He sat and listened as she explained how she overheard them, discussing plans for an arranged marriage. The more he heard, the more he realized that all Bailey had been was a pawn for her parents and their wealth. These people were sick. They never loved her. They were in love with money. She was a means as a tax-write off until she turned eighteen-years-old, then she became a means for a wealthier future.
When she finished, she curled into his body, and he just held her as the storm rolled on outside. She cried, and he let her weep. He had a feeling she’d never really had a good cry, and sometimes, people just needed one. This was twenty-six years of pent up feelings and emotions. He couldn’t imagine what it must have felt like to be that alone growing up.
He spoke against her head. “Sweetness, I want you to promise me something.” She lifted her head to look at him, and because of the tears, her eyes reminded him of sparkling ice glaciers. God, she was beautiful and so trusting. “I want you to promise me that if your parents or Randy ever make any contact with you, whether it be text, phone call, or making an appearance like Randy did the other night, that you tell me. If I’m deployed, I want you to promise me that you’ll call my commander.”
She started to shake her head. “Ky, I don’t think that’s necessary. I don’t want to---” He cut her off.
“No exceptions. With what you’ve told me, I don’t trust them not to show up here and try to take you away, or worse, do you harm. Promise me. Please.”
“I just don’t want to be a burden. I mean, come on. Calling your commander? Isn’t that a little over the top?”
“You aren’t a burden. Your being with me means you are now a part of our unit. You are family. We all take care of one another. When the team is deployed, there are plans and protocols in place to protect the ones here at home. I won’t go into detail now, but Alex, Tenley, and Autumn all went through traumatic experiences, serious enough that we could have lost them. But they survived because we worked together to bring them home safe.
◆◆◆
His persistence paid off. “Okay, Ky. I promise. I kinda got the same lecture from Bear before you showed up that night. You can check my phone; he actually put his number in there.”
He reached out and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. “That’s a start. But I would hope I would be the one you would call first.” His large palm cupped her cheek.
“Of course, you’d be.”
They stared at each other, both of their blue eyes holding one another’s gaze. He gripped her hip tighter and pulled her toward him. His touch sent electricity zapping through her body.
“I want to kiss you right now,” he told her.
She licked her lips as she glanced at his lips. She wanted him to kiss her. “What’s stopping you?” She asked, sounding seductive to her own ears.
He closed the distance, and she closed her eyes, anticipating the feel of his lips. When she felt his firm but gentle lips, she scooted closer. He tightened his grip while she slid her free arm around his waist. Her hands wanted to explore his taut body. His lips gently brushed against hers a few times. She opened her eyes for just a moment, and her eyes locked on his. They were nose to nose, mouth to mouth. She could feel the warm puff of air with every breath he took. He grinned, and this time, he swiped his tongue against her lips, and she opened. He invaded her mouth, leaving no area unexplored. He nibbled, sucked, and stroked with experience and ease. As he let up, he nibbled her bottom lip, eliciting a feminine moan from her.
Irish was a great kisser. Not that she had many experiences to compare to. She thought back to the conversation she’d had with Alex and Tenley. Of course, he was a great kisser. He’d had a lot of practice. He was very experienced if what Alex and Tenley had told her was true. Then she wondered, was this what this was right now? Would he want to sleep with her tonight and then be done with her? She was confused and upset that now of all times, her mind decided it wanted to sit and process things. She abruptly pulled back. They were both breathing heavily.
“Everything okay?” He asked, not letting his hold on her go.
She shook her head. “I don’t know. I need to ask you something, but I don’t want to come across as sounding like a jealous bitch.”
“Bailey, you can ask me anything you’d like. I’m an open book. That is unless it pertains to my job, then I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to give you an answer.”
“No, it has nothing to do about your job. That’s not what worries me. Well, I mean, your job worries me. You put your life in danger every day, but…” She looked away from him as she contemplated asking what had been on her mind.
“Hey, what is it?” He asked, turning her face back towards his.
“I’ve heard….” As embarrassing as it was to ask, she needed to, so she could have peace of mind. Just ask! “How many women have you slept with?”
He closed his eyes and grimaced as if her question caused him pain. “Can I plead the fifth?”
Her stomach sunk, and she lowered her eyes. “That many, huh?”
He was quick to respond. “Let me explain. With my career, I never thought about settling down. The burden of having someone waiting here at home for me and worrying if I’ll make it back alive was something I couldn’t live with. Then there was the thought of my partner being unfaithful to me while I was gone. It was better for me not to have those worries. Any woman in the past who I’ve had sex with was just that, just sex. There were no commitments. And I’m ashamed to even to say this, but I never even stayed the night with a woman. When the sex was over, I was gone. They understood that before anything even got started.”
Bailey felt sick to her stomach. She’d never been with a man before, and Irish was beyond experienced. He seemed like he should have a title of Master or something. She was jealous. How was she going to tell him she was a virgin? Would he laugh at her? Would he run? Oh, Lord help her.
“What are you thinking about right now, sweetness?” He asked, twirling a strand of her hair around his finger as he watched her.
“What exactly sets me apart from your other conquests of women? How do I know that you’re not in this for just the sex? That I’m not just another easy lay for you?” There, she said it. And judging by his fierce expression, she thought she may have overstepped.
He pulled her closer and looked into her eyes. His eyes were so expressive.
“First of all, don’t ever think of yourself as an easy lay. That thought never even crossed my mind. So, get that shit out of your head right now. If I just wanted sex, you wouldn’t be here at my house. I wouldn’t have left Sienna with you all day. And most importantly, you sure as hell wouldn’t be here in my arms while we have a heart-to-heart talk.”
“Do I want you? Absolutely! I don’t think you realize how hard it is for me to lay here with you and not get lost in this fine body of yours. Those other women meant nothing to me. I’ve never wanted to get to know them. But you…I want to learn everything about you; your favorite color, your favorite song, you name it, I want to know.”
He held her chin. “I haven’t been in a committed relationship in a long time. But you have to believe me when I tell you that night we met; something changed in me. Nobody else since that night has occupied my mind but you. I mentioned you to the guys, and they even gave you that nickname ‘Blue.’ For your beautiful blue eyes. And then, when I saw you in that cla
ssroom, I just knew it was fate. I want you and only you.”
She wanted to believe every word he was telling her, but she couldn’t shake that little bit of doubt she held on to. Before she could really get inside her head, she was being lifted, and he placed her on his lap. She didn’t know where to put her hands, so she looped them over his shoulders.
“What are you afraid of? The truth.” He asked her.
She wet her lips and took a deep breath. “If we move forward with this relationship, I’d be giving you something that I haven’t given any other man. Something I have fought hard to keep because it is my gift to give and not for others to take.”
She watched his face carefully as he contemplated her words. She knew when it clicked, and he realized what she was trying to tell him. His eyebrows shot upward, and his eyes widened, before they darkened. He gripped her waist. Not in a violently but a possessive tight hold that had her body reacting.
“Sweetness…are you telling me that you’re a virgin?”
She bit her bottom lip and could feel how flush her face was right now. “What if I told you I was?”
“If I weren’t sitting here looking at you, I’d call you a liar.”
She tilted her head. “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why would you think I was lying?”
He ran his knuckles down her cheek to her neck before he clasped his large hand behind her neck. His possessive hold aroused her. He smiled, and his eyes crinkled in the corners. He was a gorgeous man.
“Because you’re beautiful, smart, sexy, and no guy in their right mind who dated you would be able to resist keeping his hands off you. But your eyes are so expressive when you speak. They speak the truth.”
She lowered her head shyly and tried to look away, but his long thick fingers held her in place.
“Don’t you for one second feel embarrassed for telling me,” he told her firmly. “Look at me.” He nudged her chin up, so she looked him in the eye. “I, for one, am damn thankful that fate put us together that night. I can’t explain it, and this is going to sound corny, but the moment my eyes locked on yours, I got this feeling deep inside my chest. I don’t know what it was, but I’ve never experienced something so powerful and deep.” He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against hers. “You are special, Bailey Anderson. I don’t know how or even why you’ve remained pure, but I respect the hell out of you, and you have my word that I will never break your heart. We go at your pace.” She closed her eyes as he kissed her forehead, her eyes, and her nose until he finally found her lips. His words and actions were sweet and caring. Jesus, she was in love with him already.
“Can I ask you a question?”
She snorted an un-ladylike laugh, one that her mother would’ve reprimanded her for. “After what I just told you, I don’t think there is anything that you couldn’t ask me.”
“How have you managed to stay celibate all these years?”
“Well, that is an entirely different story. One that will surely have you hating my parents.”
“I already hate your parents. Anyone who treats their child like your parents treated you don’t deserve to be called a parent in the first place.”
“From the first meeting I had with Randy, my mother made it clear that my virginity belonged to him. She knew I was still a virgin. That’s what happens when your mother is best friends with your gynecologist. Talk about major HIPPA violations. Anyway, over the years, I was getting tired of her holding that over my head. Part of me wanted just to go out, and have sex with the first man I ran into to throw it in my mother’s face.”
“But you didn’t?”
She shook her head. “I couldn’t go through with it. Before my grandma died, she and I had talked one day, and she told me that the man who I chose to give my gift to is the man whom I’m destined to marry. I know that sounds so fairytale-like, but that’s the honest to god truth why I couldn’t do it. Every time I came close, and believe me, there were a couple of times that I came very close; it was her words that prevented me from going through with it. It’s something I didn’t want to look back on and regret.”
He smiled and kissed her nose. “Well, I, for one, am glad you didn’t go through with it.”
“Why is that? Knowing your past, I thought you would prefer someone with more experience in the bedroom.”
He gave her a soft smile and brought her hand up to his lips and kissed it. “Because I know that I’ll be the only man to ever make love to you. The only man who will ever give you the pleasure you deserve and the only man to love you.”
She swallowed the enormous lump in her throat and did everything to hold back her tears. But now she had to tell him the rest of the story. This part was a little more embarrassing, but she made Alex a promise. She would be honest with Irish.
She took a deep breath. “There’s something else I need to tell you. Though I have never been with a man, technically speaking, I’m not a virgin.”
He scrunched his forehead up. “I don’t understand. Either you’ve had sex, or you haven’t.”
She covered her face with her hands. “Geeze, I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you.”
“Hey…look at me. There is nothing you say that could scare me off or think anything less of you.”
“I sort of took my own virginity,” she blurted out.
“You what?” He asked, looking confused at that revelation.
She didn’t know if she should be embarrassed or laugh at the expression on Irish’s face. “I was so pissed at my mother one night when she started on me about not spreading my legs for any other man but Randy, and I was just so tired of it. I felt as if that tiny thin barrier inside of me was a controlling factor in my life. So, I ordered myself a vibrator online, and the day it was delivered, I had a couple of glasses of wine, and I think you get the gist of what happened next.”
He gave her a sideways glance. “You didn’t?”
She buried her face in her hands. “I did, and the next day I, of course, had to call my mother.”
“What exactly did you tell her?” Irish asked, looking amused that she actually bought a vibrator and devirginized herself just to piss her mother off.
“I told her I met a guy; we got drunk, and we had wild sex.”
“And what was her reaction?”
With a roll of her eyes, she said, “She flipped out and called me a whore and along with other colorful names that popped into her callous mind.”
“Damn.” He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her down, so she laid on top of him. They laid there in silence. Chest to chest, both of their hearts beating together as one. She wondered what was going through his mind right now. Did she have too much baggage? But the thought of him stepping away from her caused her to tear up again. She tried everything to hold back the dam threatening to break. She took a deep breath and sat up, bringing him up with her.
She reached out and cupped his cheek, and he gave her a sweet, sultry smile. “Are you sure that you’re okay with everything I’ve told you tonight? Because if you’re not, I understand completely, and I’ll walk away with no hard feelings.” She had to know because she needed to walk away before she became any more invested in him. She was falling fast and hard for him. If he told her everything was fine now, but then a month from now decided he couldn’t handle her past and walked away from her, she didn’t think she’d be able to survive that heartbreak.
No sooner did she get those words out, he was pulling her back onto his lap. His strong arms embraced her, and he wiped her eyes, something he seemed to be doing a lot of tonight.
“I don’t know what you have going through that pretty little mind of yours, sweetheart, but I’ll be damned if I’m letting you go.” He brushed her hair from her face. “You are a brave and courageous woman, Bailey. I’ll admit, what you’ve been through pisses me off immensely, and if I ever come face-to-face with your parents, I’ll tell them exactly what I think of them. Then I woul
d tell them that you are mine, and if they ever hurt you again, they would have to deal with me.” And on that note, he leaned forward and kissed her. And boy, did he kiss her. It was a toe-curling, melt her panties type of kiss.
As she eased back, she gazed into his eyes. “I’m yours?”
He grinned but stated in a serious and commanding tone, “Damn straight, you’re mine, woman. You belong to me, and nobody fucks with what is mine.”
Holy freaking shit. Irish was intense. He was fierce. And the best part of it all, he was hers.
“Now come here. You taste too good. I need more,” he told her in a sexy, commanding tone before his mouth descended upon hers once again. There was no opposition from her; she opened immediately, wanting and needing his mouth on her. Neither one of them held back. He plunged his warm, velvety tongue into the depths of her mouth. He took possession and led a full-on assault, nibbling, sucking, and stroking. His fingers slid into her hair while his other hand rested just under her breast. He gave her tresses a slight tug that sent sparks from her head to her core, causing a moan to escape. He was lethal. He was wild, and she felt on fire. The feel of his hands on her body drove her insane. She could only imagine how it would feel to be skin-to-skin with him. She wanted so much more, but she needed to slow this down before she ended up losing her virginity right here and now. She pulled back, ending the euphoric kiss, and just stared at him. His eyes glistened, but she sensed some concern. “I’m sorry, I need to slow things down a little.”
He chuckled and dropped a light kiss to her nose. “No worries, sweetness, and I should apologize. Your body is just too tempting, and I can’t help myself.”
He grinned, and she looked at that sexy scar of his. She reached out and rubbed her thumb along the faint white line, wondering how he got it. Probably some super-secret mission that he couldn’t talk about. Not that it bothered her. She’d read enough to know how things worked with these men. She leaned forward and placed her lips against the scar and felt his breath shudder, and she leaned back.