by Kailin Gow
their technique.
At last it was my turn. My first match, against Alice,
was a predictable defeat, although in my defense I managed
to withstand her superior strength for a full five seconds
longer than last time. But my second match, with Misty,
proved a more even fight.
“Good luck,” I heard Chance whisper to her as she
got up to fight me, and I quietly seethed. Chance, whatever
else had happened between us, had kissed me only two days
ago: shouldn't he be wishing me good luck? I couldn't help
glaring at Misty – what did she have that I didn't? Why was
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he so nice to her and not to me? Did Chance have an
especially soft sport for electric-blue hair?
This time I won. Whether I was spurred by a genuine
improvement in my wrestling technique or by jealousy and
adrenaline I do not know, but I managed to get Misty on her
back, pinning her tightly to the mat and accidentally bruising
her elbow in the process.
“Are you hurt?” Chance helped Misty up, inspecting
her elbow and touching it softly with his finger.
I looked at him with surprise. How could he be so
kind with Misty, so gentle, when he was such a rake to me?
And then it hit me.
Misty was his girlfriend. That was the reason he'd
been avoiding me, avoiding our attraction, pushing me away.
He and Misty already had some sort of connection. My face
flushed with shame – how had I been so stupid, so
thoughtlessly cruel, as to go after another girl's boyfriend?
But that shame quickly turned to anger. It had been Chance's
choice to dance with me, Chance's choice to kiss me that first
time – and he'd certainly kissed me back on the second. It
was clear that I liked him, and he could have told me at any
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time that he was seeing someone else.
But instead he'd chosen to lead me on, to betray
Misty and to make me into some kind of a fool. For fun, I
wondered bitterly? Did he enjoy humiliating me? My cheeks
blazed. How dare Chance lie to me like that!
Coach Matthews turned to me. “You look flushed,
Evers,” he said. “You look like you could use another go.”
“I sure could,” I muttered. “I'm not done yet.”
“Lots of energy for a beginner.” Coach Matthews
laughed. “I'm impressed.” He scribbled something I couldn't
see down on the keyboard. “Heart of a champion, clearly.”
He looked the class up and down, trying to decide whom to
match me up against next. “How about this?” He patted me
on the shoulder. “You pick out your next opponent. Anyone
you want. Completely your choice.”
“I think I know who I want to fight.” I turned my
gaze to Chance. “Chance Cutter, you ready for a fight?”
Chance looked up at me with surprise, a look of
shock that turned swiftly into a subtle glare. “Very well,
Evers.” He sprang onto the floor. When he was close enough
to me, he muttered into my ear. “Just what do you think
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you're doing?”
“Just seeing what you've got, Cutter!” I put my hand
on my hips. “A girl's just curious, that's all.”
“Don't push me, Mac.”
So that's what it took to get him to call me by my first
name, I noticed with a wry smile. A challenge. I curled my
lips. I was going to make sure Chance stopped calling me by
my last name if it was the last thing I did
“Ready?” Coach Matthews called out affably from
the sidelines. “One, two, three...”
Chance simply stood staring at me, immobile and
dark, his muscles well-defined beneath his tight sports shirt.
His brilliant blue eyes seemed to floor me of their own
accord.
For a moment I was weak. I wanted to rush to him,
to love him, to kiss him.
But the moment passed. I saw Misty out of the corner
of my eye, and jealousy and rage flooded through me. I
wasn't about to give up my dignity, my self-respect, to a jerk
who'd played around on his girlfriend and didn't even have
the decency to be upfront about it.
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I rushed him, knocking him to the ground. His eyes
flew wide open with surprise – he hadn't expected me to be
so strong. But he grabbed me back, tumbling over me. I
could feel his hot breath on my body; I could feel our sweat-
soaked frames twining together, our hearts beating faster
with anger and desire. He tried to push me off him, but I held
on tight, raising his wrists to try to push them over his head.
Now he fought back. He grabbed my wrists, his
rough grip driving me wild as he pulled me to him, flipping
me onto my front so that he was lying atop my back, his lips
so close to my ear. He'd won, I noticed bitterly – now all he
had to do was pin me down. But he held on – so tight – as if
he didn't want to let go.
“What are you waiting for?” I snarled. “Throw me
down, Chance. Isn't that more your style?”
“Don't tempt me,” he whispered, his grip growing
even tighter.
“Manly man and all? The great god? I don't know,
Chance, I've been awfully cold lately. Maybe you should
take me to your secret lair and make me your goddess!”
Outside the mountain, the words sounded foolish, even
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ridiculous – some stupid game we had both played.
“Don't you ever say those words to me again.” Now
he was angry.
“I forgot – you're afraid...”
“I'm never afraid, Evers. And don't you dare believe
I'm the sort of man who would let myself be a coward.”
Evers. The formality was back.
He thrust my face into the mat and raised his hand
into the air. Five seconds I lay, wriggling and furious in my
defeat.
A routine wrestling move. One I'd done ten or twenty
times that very hour. But with Chance on the mat with me,
our simple game felt like so much more. I felt as if lightning
had pierced through my skin. My heart was racing.
At Coach Matthews' “match!” Chance released me,
and I clambered to my feet. As I turned to face him, I saw
that his eyes were once again filled with deep pain alongside
his anger. Those weren't the eyes of a jerk out for a laugh, I
knew – those weren't the eyes of someone who would cheat
on his girlfriend as a game. There was something more going
on, as if he were fighting within himself.
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I stumbled as I rose, but Chance did nothing to help
me up. “Don't let your emotions distract you so much,” he
said. “Or else you'll never make the kill. Then it'll be you that
gets killed, Evers.”
He strode off, leaving me utterly confused. What did
Chance mean by all these strange words – these
esoteric
hints at a danger I did not understand, but could nevertheless
sense deep within myself?
Was it him I was in danger from?
Chance strode over to the door by the exit. Misty was
waiting for him, her blue hair even more shocking in the
harsh yellow lights. Chance put his arm around Misty's
shoulders and the two walked out together, leaving me
standing on the mat. Alone.
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Chapter 11
I passed through the locker room in a haze, most
confused than ever. As I changed back into my day dress, I
did my best to ignore Misty, who was changing into a
thoroughly school-inappropriate outfit of black leather
pants, knee-high boots, and studded spike collars, treating
me with a neutrality so perfectly polite that it was clear she
had no idea what I'd done with her boyfriend. But even here,
in the girls' locker room, as far away from Chance as I was
likely to get in this school, I felt his presence still. Why did
I let such a cad have such power over me? Why had I let him
treat me the way I did? And I hadn't just hoped he'd kissed
me, either. I'd gone straight up to him and gone for the kill
myself. I'd kissed him.
Maybe it was all just in my head. The flames at the
luau, the looks we'd shared at the dance, our electric
connection – maybe I'd invented them all as part of a stupid
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crush. Maybe he'd never had any interest in me at all. After
all, from insulting me at the dance to pulling away from our
last kiss, he'd done his best to push me away. Maybe he was
making it clear that he wasn't interested – and I was just
being desperate and pathetic, little better than a stalker.
But then why did he stare at me in that way, so full
of desire, of longing? Why did he speak to me of danger,
tempt me with that kiss up on the mountain. Surely he could
have found another way to save me from those men –
whoever they were – if he was that intent on pushing me
away. He didn't have to kiss me – and he certainly didn't have
to kiss me that hard. He was leading me on; I knew it now.
He was doing his best to drive me crazy on purpose. Because
it was fun? Because he was cocky enough to think he could
get away with it?
I sighed as I pushed my way out of the locker room
and into the hall. I was flushed from the exertion and the
exercise, but also from the embarrassment. Had anyone seen
the way Chance had treated me, I wondered? Did the other
boys in my class know how I felt about him? I put my hands
to my face, as if imagining that I could feel signs of my
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shame there.
No, I decided – no more. It was clear that, whether
Chance liked me or not, he certainly wasn't interested in
having anything to do with me. And I wasn't going to go out
and embarrass myself by running after him or trying to kiss
him again. In any case, I had Varun and Brandon, didn't I?
Varun was certainly hot but also kind, sweet, and handsome,
and who seemed interested in me. Someone who had been
polite and unfailingly gentle to me since I had known him.
How could I be stupid enough to chase the flames of my
passion with Chance, when I had the potential for a great
relationship already with Varun?
And Brandon? He was playful, fun, and someone
who got along with everyone like Varun did, but wasn’t a
Cutter so he had an outsider perspective. He didn’t seemed
to have that history between the Cutter Cousins. Popular like
Varun and Chance, he was also known as one of the Princes
of Paradise. He also didn’t seem to mind me being with
Varun or Varun minding me being with Brandon.
Enough, I thought. Maybe Chance liked to play these
games, but I sure didn't. I wanted someone who wanted me
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just as badly – and right now that person was Varun. I closed
my eyes as I thought once more of our kiss in the garden. His
lips were so light, so tender – like the landing of a
hummingbird. His arms made me feel protected, calm and
safe. His blue eyes were wide and full of kindness. He was
– in every respect so far – the perfect guy. And was I really
about to jeopardize all that for an opportunity to score a
commitment-phobic cheater like Chance?
And if Varun was as good a best friend to Brandon,
and it was fine with him about Brandon…
I scoffed. I just had to force myself to forget the
imprint Chance had left on my body when we danced, when
we kissed. I had to forget the way my blood burned, the way
my eyes saw flames dancing around him, the way the heat
prickled and overwhelmed my skin. I had to forget it all. I
had to be strong.
Never mind that the feeling of his lips on mine,
involuntarily remembered, sent me reeling. Never mind all
that.
I was interrupted from my reverie by the calling of
my name.
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“Mac!” Varun appeared from around the corner, his
book bag slung over one shoulder. I smiled to see him. He
looked as handsome and as happy as ever, his normally-
soaked hair uncharacteristically dry. “I'm so sorry I didn't
call you, Mac,” Varun flushed. “You see – I'm an idiot. I
forgot to get your number. I came over to your house on
Saturday afternoon, but nobody was there, and then Uncle
Tony wanted me to work all day Sunday so...” He looked
down. “Sorry, you must think I'm a real jerk for not calling
you.”
You – a jerk?
That settled it. I'd rather be with someone who
apologized when he wasn't being a jerk than someone who
refused to apologize when he was one.
“No problem,” I said. “I figured I hadn't given you
my number or anything, so I wasn't hurt. And I had a lot of
homework to do. Aeros history is hard when you've only
been living here a couple of days. I feel so behind.”
“Nah, don't worry,” he said. “You'll catch up. But –
um – hopefully – do you think maybe you'd catch up enough
in time to take a couple of hours off tonight?”
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“I doubt it! I've got so much...” Then I realized what
he was saying. “Unless you have a suggestion for how I
could better spend my time.”
Varun brightened immediately. “There's so much to
do here on Aeros,” he said. “And so little time!” He smiled
shyly at me. “You know, Mac,” he said. “I had a really great
time with you the other night. Only you could make a
twelve-year-old kid's party so much fun! Well, that and
pizza, at any rate.”
“I'm really glad I came,” I said. “It was a good start
to the year.”
“So maybe we could do it again, sometime?�
� Varun
looked up at me hopefully. “Maybe without all the kids
running around?”
“Again sometime?”
“Well, I was thinking more of again tonight,” said
Varun. “Maybe I could take you out on Uncle Tony's boat.
We could go to a cove I know about five miles east of here.
You can't get to it by walking; the path's too steep. Maybe I
could bring a picnic – a bottle of coconut cider, some fruit
and cheese, maybe I can even steal us a meal from the hotel
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buffet.”
“Yeah,” I said. “That sounds nice. I'd like that a lot.”
A romantic moonlit picnic certainly sounded a lot more fun
than getting chased by bulls and threatened by warrior men
on a mountaintop. And I would be going with someone who
seemed to actually want me around.
“Wow,” Varun said. “It sounds like I managed to get
a date with a pretty girl. No idea how that happened. You can
back out now, you know. If you're not sure.” He grinned at
me.
“I don't know,” I said, flirting back. “I feel like I got
a pretty good deal, too.”
As I spoke, Varun put his arm around my shoulder.
He smiled as he leaned in, his lips lightly brushing mine.
Then he pulled me close, his kiss soft and romantic, his hand
lightly cupped behind my head, stroking my hair with
infinite tenderness.
“No, definitely me,” said Varun. “I got the better
deal! You'll just have to settle for me, I guess.” I loved the
way I looked in his eyes – he made me feel beautiful.
Desirable. Wanted – from my hair to my toes. Someone that
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