A wave of heat relaxed her grip on her arms. She started to turn the rest of her body toward him, until his lashes rose, and the torment in his darkened gaze froze her on the spot.
“Three years ago, I was blind for five days.”
Of all the things he could’ve said, she never would’ve guessed something like that.
Three years ago…he’d been in the military then, hadn’t he?
“It was one hundred percent. No shadows. Nothing.”
Raine swallowed past a sudden lump in her throat and whispered, “What happened?”
“Bomb.”
She waited for more, but he shook his head, his jaw set.
Raine sighed softly. Even without knowing details, she couldn’t imagine how terrifying it must’ve been to be blinded and believe you’d never see again. And though it appeared his vision had recovered, after something like that, she could totally understand why he wouldn’t like the dark.
Guilt crowded in again, and she reached out to cover his hand with hers. “I’m sorry.”
His gaze shifted from her face to their hands. Self-conscious, she started to pull back, but he twisted his wrist and caught her fingers. “You have nothing to be sorry for—but it is your turn.”
Her heart lurched in her chest both from the warmth of his touch and the insistence in his gruff voice. Her experience paled by comparison.
“My fall over a horse jump doesn’t really seem like a big deal now, does it?”
“Don’t do that.” He shook his head, his fingers squeezing hers, the pressure almost painful before he relaxed his hold. “Never minimize what happened to you, Raine. It doesn’t have to compare to what anyone else has gone through. Someone else’s experience does not make the trauma you experienced any less worthy of serious attention.”
The lump in her throat doubled in size, and she blinked against the painful sting of tears. She hadn’t ever really thought of her accident as trauma. Pulling her hand free from his, she turned back to the hedges, wishing she could hide deep in the shadows of their branches. He didn’t like the dark. She welcomed the cover it provided.
“The whole thing is still so vivid in my mind,” she whispered. “Just thinking about it puts me right back in the moment.”
Water lapped against her back when he moved closer. Close enough for her shoulder to brush against his chest, her hip against his thigh. The contact was like an anchor she didn’t even know she needed.
“Fire was on point that day. He sailed over every jump without a single fault. We were well under the course time limit, and when we made the final turn, there were only three jumps left.” She closed her eyes, and the image was right there.
With a quick shake of her head, she opened her eyes again.
But the jump remained.
“The way they were set up, I misjudged the height on the vertical, which was stupid, because I knew the height from the walk-through. But the visual between the rails threw me off and I timed it wrong. Fire tried to refuse at the last second, and I wouldn’t let him, so he tried to clear it but got tangled in the rails—”
“Breathe,” Reyes murmured next to her ear.
She sucked in a gasping breath and realized her whole body was shaking.
Against him.
When had he moved that close? When had he put his arm around her? And damn it, she was crying.
“Now let it back out.”
He meant the breath, not her tears. She did as instructed while his hand rubbed up and down the arm not pressed against his chest.
“Take another.”
The soothing tone of his voice calmed her enough to think past the panic. Except when her words replayed in her head, a sob escaped her tight lungs. “Oh my God—it was my fault.”
“It’s no one’s fault.”
“It was mine,” she insisted with a shake of her head. “I messed up. Fire could’ve broken a leg—or both. I could’ve killed him.”
“Is that why you’re afraid of the jump?”
Raine gave a jerky nod without even thinking. “He trusted me. I forced him to jump, and he trusted me, and I could’ve killed him.”
“He still trusts you.”
“He shouldn’t.”
When Reyes pulled her closer, she didn’t resist. Not only did she not resist, she turned to wrap both arms around his neck and held on for dear life while he held them afloat with a one-handed grip on the edge. The pool was heated, but it was the warmth from his body that battled the chill of her memories as his lips brushed against her temple.
“He trusts you because you’re his partner,” he murmured. “You have to learn to trust yourself again. And to trust him, too.”
That lump materialized in her throat once more. “I-I don’t know if I can.”
“That’s why you’re here,” he said. “We’re gonna figure this out, Raine. I promise.”
She wished his words offered comfort, but she worried what they were going to figure out was equally as frightening as the jump. It brought the question he’d asked earlier back to the forefront. Did she want to compete anymore? Was she willing to risk so much for her dream of Olympic gold?
Was it her dream?
That question jolted hard, but just then, another press of Reyes’ lips suddenly shifted her awareness.
Or maybe she was desperate for a diversion, mentally running from the uncertainty of her future.
Whatever the reason, she became conscious of every inch where their bodies touched. He held onto the side of the pool with one hand, his arm wrapped around her waist and hers around his neck. There wasn’t an inch to separate them, from their hips, to where her breasts pressed against his bare chest.
She stilled, a hairsbreadth away from burying her face in the crook of his neck to drown herself in his arousing scent. When her brain registered his growing erection against her stomach, her pulse went all haywire. Molten heat flooded her veins before pooling into a yearning throb deep inside. Her nipples tightened, and her legs grew heavy from the wave of desire.
His breathing had become as shallow as hers. “Raine.”
There was the tiniest note of regret in his voice. Or maybe a warning?
She ignored both. With her heart thumping like mad, she loosened her hold around his neck and flattened one palm against the side of his head to turn his face to hers. He didn’t resist, but when her mouth found his, he tensed for a heart-stopping second.
With the proof of his desire against her belly, she licked at the seam of his lips, demanding his participation. From one breath to the next, his arm tightened around her ribs, and he slanted his mouth over hers to take control of the kiss with a toe-curling growl. His tongue dueled with hers, each stroke making the pulse deep in her core throb harder.
God, how many times had she thought of a moment like this over the past ten months—and even a few times before that? Reality was so much better than her imagination.
Swept up in a swirl of sensation and desire, she raised one leg to hook over his hip and ground herself against his hardness. Reyes sucked in a breath and muttered something against her lips, but dove right back in when she lifted her other leg and wrapped them both around his waist. How easy it would be to slip off her one-piece and his briefs and forget everything for a while.
Hopefully a long while.
The thought curved her lips under his, until his hand closed over her breast. Her breath hitched when he rubbed a thumb over her hard nipple, then she gasped when he pinched. She arched into his palm before maneuvering to drag one strap of her suit off her shoulder, then the other.
His gaze dropped as she peeled her suit down to her waist while lifting up so her breasts were out of the water for him to see and touch. She yearned for his hands on her again. His mouth. His tongue.
When she lifted higher in clear offering, the move earned her another low groan, but the unmistakable tone of regret in the rumbling sound sparked a flutter of panic in her chest.
“Fuck,” he muttered while
closing his eyes.
Yep. There it was again.
Her stomach sank, and she dunked herself back down until the water lapped at her chin. Still, her legs were locked around his waist. His erection still pressed against her core.
Dread chipped at her confidence as she asked, “What?”
He winced, his eyes still closed. “I can’t.”
She frowned in confusion, especially given his obvious arousal—until the word bomb echoed in her mind. Oh, God. Her heart thudded hard in dismay. Now she felt bad that he was all worked up and couldn’t do anything about it.
“Reyes…I…I’m sorry.”
His eyes popped open, and his forehead furrowed. “Don’t apologize. It’s my fault, not yours. I shouldn’t have taken advantage.”
Wait—what?
Confusion kept her from resisting as he pulled her suit back up to cover her chest, then gently unlocked her legs, and guided her hand to hang on to the edge of the pool instead of his shoulder.
As he pushed away from the edge to put distance between them, she said, “I’m confused. You said you can’t.”
“I work for your uncle.”
What? “What does that have to do with what happened to you?”
The lines in his forehead cut deeper. “What do you mean, what happened to me?”
She bit the corner of her lip, not wanting to say it, but forcing it out anyway. Gently. Softly. Her voice full of sympathetic understanding. “The bomb?”
“The bomb? What does that—” His eyes went wide and shocked horror flashed across his face. “Oh, God, that is not what I meant when I said I can’t.”
“Then what did you mean?”
“Your uncle pays my salary.”
It took a moment, but finally she made the connection. And was immediately pissed off. “So?”
“So, he asked me to help you, not sleep with you.”
“Aren’t you allowed to do what you want in your free time?”
His expression darkened. “That’s not the point.”
“Well, it’s not like you’re getting paid extra for me.”
“Yet, he’d still probably fire me if he found out about this.”
She narrowed her gaze, then shoved away from the wall. “Believe me, I won’t be telling anyone,” she advised over her shoulder.
He swam after her as she headed for the shallow end. “You’re seriously mad right now?”
More like mortified.
“Gimmie a break here.” He followed her up the steps. “I’m trying to do the right thing.”
“The right thing would’ve been to not make me think you wanted this in the first place.”
“I do want this, but you have to understand, I—”
“I understand perfectly.” She grabbed her towel to wrap it around herself sarong style. Trying to salvage a smidgeon of her dignity, she half-turned toward him but didn’t look at his face as she said stiffly, “I’m sorry I put you in a bad position. It won’t happen again.”
She spun for the patio doors, but didn’t even make it one step before he gripped her arm and swung her back to face him. With her head tipped back to see his face, her breath caught when she saw the turmoil in his darkened green eyes.
“I want you, Raine. More than I’ve ever wanted anyone before.” His lashes lowered, hiding all that heart-wrenching emotion. “But I need this job. Because of what happened, I need to be here, doing what I do.”
His voice turned to pure gravel at the end, and her chest squeezed so tight she could barely breathe. She wanted to reach out and hug him, but he was still in only his wet, skin-tight boxer briefs, leaving nothing much to the imagination. Not to mention, if she pressed up against his bare chest again, there was no telling what she might do.
It took major effort to step back from temptation. As she moved back, his fingers skimmed down the back of her arm, past her elbow, and along the underside of her wrist before he finally dropped his arm to his side. As if he knew he had to let her go, but didn’t want to.
She hugged her arms across her chest while suppressing a shiver. “I guess I’ll see you in the morning then.”
He gave a tight nod. “I have an adoption appointment for Morning Glory at eight, so you don’t have to be down to the barn until nine.”
“Nine it is.” This time he didn’t stop her when she forced her feet to take her inside.
Raine locked up, took a shower, and went to bed. She turned off the bedroom television at midnight. When she got sick of staring at the ceiling round about two a.m., she went to the kitchen for a glass of water. As the cool liquid slid down her throat, her gaze was drawn across the sprawling lawn, toward the stables. The windows of the upstairs apartment were lit up as if it were evening instead of middle of the night.
Did Reyes leave the lights on to ward off the dark, or was he wide awake like her, wishing for what could have been?
9
Reyes greeted Bob and Nancy Hamilton outside the barn precisely at eight the next morning before accompanying them inside. They would be the perfect distraction to keep his mind off facing Raine at nine.
His step faltered when he saw her standing outside Morning Glory’s stall.
He’d barely slept after walking away from her last night. All he could think about when he closed his eyes was the feel of her lips beneath his, the seductive slide of her tongue, the weight of her breast in his palm, and the erotic sight of her tight nipples as the water lapped at her bare chest. Taking the edge off in the shower hadn’t been nearly satisfying enough and only lasted for so long.
Even now, the quick, hesitant smile she shot him before introducing herself to the Hamiltons had his body taking notice. Christ, you’d think he was a horny teenager instead of a grown man perfectly capable of controlling his base urges. But another under-the-lashes glance from Raine had him clenching his jaw.
It was going to be a long day.
Damn—try a long three and a half weeks!
“I saw what happened at the end of the season,” Nancy said, having recognized Raine’s name from the jumping circuit. “That was a tough break. How is everything going?”
She grimaced at the older woman. “A little more down than up, but we’re working hard to get back to where we were. Reyes is working with us for the next few weeks.”
The openness of her reply surprised him. That was a step up from her usual, “We’re fine.”
“You’re in good hands,” Bob assured her before turning to Reyes. “We couldn’t be happier with Ivy Rose and Dozer.”
He seized the opportunity to shift focus. “Then you’re going to be thrilled with Morning Glory. She reminded me of Dozer from the moment she arrived.”
“Janice has told me all about her,” Nancy said. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting her.”
“Please, go ahead.” He gestured toward the stall. “You know the drill by now, and if you have any questions, just ask.”
The two of them moved ahead, and Raine sidled up beside him to ask in a low voice, “What’s the drill?”
Acutely aware she was close enough for him to smell her fresh, flowery body wash, he kept his gaze focused on the mare. “They’ll get her tacked up and head out to the arena for a bit before taking her out on the trails to see how she handles everything. If all goes well, we’ll sign the papers, and she’ll be off to her new home.”
“How long have you been working with her?”
“About three months.”
“And you’ve done this with over a hundred and fifty horses?”
The awe in her voice made his chest swell with pride. “I haven’t worked with all of them, but I’ve had my fair share.”
“Don’t you get attached to the ones you work with?”
Unfortunately, yeah. And he was discovering it wasn’t limited to the horses. The thought brought a frown as he replied, “It helps knowing they’re going to a good home.”
And that he helped them get there, which was exactly what he needed to do with
Raine. Help her, and send her on her way.
Without touching her again.
Her fingers grazed his bicep, and he flinched.
When he shifted away while glancing down at her, she tilted her head with a frown of her own. “Is everything okay?”
“Yep,” he said shortly.
“I was curious about how the adoptions worked, that’s why I came down early. But if it’s a problem, I can come back at nine.”
It wasn’t her fault he couldn’t think straight for wanting to take her upstairs, strip her bare, and bury himself deep inside her. Well, it was, but it wasn’t.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he bit out more harshly than he’d intended as he watched Bob and Nancy working with Morning Glory. “It’s fine.”
“Good.” Raine crossed her arms, twisting on her heel to stare right at him with challenge written all over her face. He avoided her gaze, only to find his attention on the swell of her breasts as her crossed arms pushed them up in her snug T-shirt.
Fuck.
“And since I’m here,” she continued, “Is there anything I can do to help?”
Reyes swallowed hard. Yeah, you can— “Muck the stalls.”
Her eyebrows rose. “What?”
The affronted tone gave him the courage to finally look her in the eye. If he got her good and pissed her off, maybe she’d keep her distance. He’d put the horses out to pasture just before the Hamiltons arrived, and had planned to do chores between her morning and afternoon sessions, but this would work, too.
“You heard me.” He cocked an eyebrow. “Unless you think you’re too good to shovel shit?”
Her gaze narrowed. “I can muck a stall, Reyes.”
“Good. Then do it.” He abruptly turned and strode toward the office before he gave in to the insane urge to pull her into his arms and kiss her breathless at eight a.m. in the morning.
An hour later, Morning Glory was in the trailer and on the way to her new home, and all the stalls in the barn were filled with fresh, fluffy pine shavings. Raine had worked without complaint doing his work, which left him feeling like an ass. In trying to do the right thing out of respect for his boss—and her—he was unfairly taking out his frustrations on her.
Don't Dare a Diamond (Must Love Diamonds Book 5) Page 6