by Elinor Glyn
CHAPTER IV
The Rev. Eustace Medlicott, when the stains of travel had been removedfrom his thin person, came down to tea in the hall of the Grand Hotelwith a distinct misgiving in his heart. He did not approve of it as aplace of residence for his betrothed. Another and equally well-drainedhostelry might have been found for the party he thought, where suchevidences of worldly occupations and amusements would not so forciblystrike the eye. Music with one's meals savored of paganism. He wasstill very emaciated with his Lenten fast. It took him until July,generally, to pick up again; and he was tired with his journey. Stellawas not there to greet him, only the Aunt Caroline, and he felt a senseof injury creeping over him. She might have been in time. NancyRuggles, the Bishop's second daughter, had given him tea and ministeredto his wants in a spirit of solicitous devotion every day since theEbleys had left Exminster, but Nancy's hair was not full of sunlight,nor did her complexion suggest cream and roses. Things which, to besure, the Rev. Eustace Medlicott felt he ought not to dwell upon; theywere fleshly lusts and should be discouraged.
He had been convinced that celibacy was the only road to salvation fora priest, until Stella Rawson's fair young charms had unconsciouslyundermined this conviction. But even if he had been able to arrange hisconscience to his liking upon the vital point, he felt he must fightbravely against allowing himself or his betrothed to get any pleasureout of the affair. It was better to marry than to burn, he had St.Paul's authority for this--but when he felt emotion toward Stellabecause of her loveliness, he was afterward very uncomfortable in histhoughts, and it took him at least an hour to throw dust in his owneyes in regard to the nature of his desire for her, which he determinedto think was only of the spirit. Love, for him, was no god to beexalted, but a too strong beast to be resisted, and every one of hisrites were to be succumbed to shamefacedly and under protest. Thus didhe criticize the scheme of his Creator like many another before him.
He sat now in the hall of the Grand Hotel at Rome feeling ill at easeand expressed some mild disapproval of the surroundings to Mrs. Ebley,who fired up at once. She was secretly enjoying herself extremely, andallowed the drains to assume gigantic proportions in her reasons fortheir choice of abode. So there was nothing more to be said, andStella, looking rather pale, presently came down the steps from thecorridor where their lift was situated, and joined the group in the farcorner of the large hall.
She was so slender and fresh and graceful, and, even in the week'ssight-seeing in Paris, she seemed to have picked up a new air, thoughshe wore the same gray Sunday dress her fiance was accustomed to see athome--it appeared to be put on differently, and she had altered thedoing of her hair. There was no doubt about it, his future wife was amost delectable-looking creature, but these tendencies toward adornmentof the person which he observed must be checked at once.
They shook hands with decorous cordiality, and Stella sat down demurelyin the vacant chair. She felt as cold as ice toward him, and looked itmore or less. It made Mr. Medlicott nervous, although she answeredgently enough when he addressed her. Inwardly she was trying toovercome the growing revulsion she was experiencing. Tricks of speech,movements of hands--even the way Eustace's hair grew--were allirritating her. She only longed to contradict every word the poor mansaid, and she felt wretched and unjust and at war with herself andfate. At last things almost came to a point when he moved his chair sothat he should be close to her and a little apart from the others, andwhispered with an air of absolute proprietorship:
"My little Stella has changed her sweetly modest way of hairdressing. Ihardly think the new style is suitable to my retiring dove."
"Why, it is only parted in the middle and brushed back into a simpleknot," Miss Rawson retorted, with sparkling eyes. "How can you be soridiculous, Eustace--it is merely because it is becoming and more inthe fashion that you object, there is nothing the least remarkable inthe style itself."
Mr. Medlicott's thin lips grew into a straight line.
"It is that very point--the suggestion of fashion that I object to--thewife of a clergyman cannot be too careful not to make herselfattractive or remarkable in any way," he said sententiously, hisobstinate chin a little forward.
"But I am not a clergyman's wife yet," said Stella with some feeling,"and can surely enjoy a few things of my age until I am--and doing myhair how I please is one of them."
Mr. Medlicott shrugged his shoulders, he refused to continue thisunseemly altercation with his betrothed. He would force her to seereason when once she should be his wife, until then he might have towaive his authority, but should show her by his manner that she hadoffended him, and judging from the attitudes of the adoring spinstershe had left at Exminster that should be punishment enough.
He turned to the Aunt Caroline now and addressed her exclusively andStella rebelliously moved her seat back a few inches and looked acrossthe room; and at that moment the tall, odd-looking Russian came in, andretired to a seat far on the other side, exactly opposite them. Here heordered a hock and seltzer with perfect unconcern, and smoked hiscigarette. Miss Rawson could hardly bear it.
"There is that extraordinary man again, Stella," Mrs. Ebley turned toher and said. "I thought he had gone as he was not at luncheon to-day.I am sure your fiance will agree with me that such an appearance issacrilegious--he must know he looks like a saint--and I am quite sure,from what I have heard from Martha, he is not one at all. He lives inthe greatest luxury, Eustace," she continued, turning to the Rev. Mr.Medlicott, "and probably does no good to anyone in the world."
"How can you suppose that, Aunt Caroline," Stella answered with somespirit, "it is surely very uncharitable to judge of people by theirappearances and--and what Martha repeats to you."
Mrs. Ebley gasped--never in her whole life had her niece spoken to herin this tone. She to be rebuked! It was unspeakable. She could onlyglare behind her glasses. What had come to the girl in the last twodays--if this manner was the result of travel, far better to havestayed at home!
Here Canon Ebley joined in, hoping to bring peace:
"You have told Eustace what is in store for him to-night, have you not,Caroline, my dear?" he asked. "We have to put on our best and take ourladies to the Embassy to a rout, Eustace," he went on, genially. "Thereare a Russian Grand Duke and Duchess passing through, it appears, whoare going to be entertained."
"There will be no dancing, I suppose," said Mr. Medlicott primly,"because, if so, I am sorry, but I cannot accompany you--it is not thatI disapprove of dancing for others," he hastened to add, "but I do notcare to watch it myself. And I do not think it wise for Stella to growto care for it, either."
"It is merely a reception," Mrs. Ebley said, "and it will be a veryinteresting sight."
Stella sat silent; she was overcome with the whole situation; and herfiance grew more distasteful to her every moment--how had she ever beenpersuaded to be engaged to such a person!--while the attraction of thestrange-looking Russian seemed to increase. In spite of the grotesquehair and unusual beard, there was an air of great distinction abouthim. His complete unconsciousness and calm were so remarkable. Youmight take him for an eccentric person, but certainly a gentleman, andwith an extraordinary magnetism, she felt. When once you had talked tohim, he seemed to cast a spell over you. But, beyond this, she onlyknew that she was growing more unhappy every moment, and that by herside one man represented everything that was tied and bound insentiment and feeling and existence, and that across the hall anotheropened the windows of her reason and imagination, and exhorted her tobe free, and herself.
Presently she could bear it no more. She got up rather suddenly, and,saying she was very tired and had letters to write, she left them andwent toward the lift.
"Stella is not at all like herself," Mr. Medlicott said, when she haddisappeared from view. "I trust she is not sickening with Roman fever."
Meanwhile, Miss Rawson had reached her room and pulled her writing casein front of her. There were one or two girl friends who ought to bewritten to, but the sheets r
emained blank--and in about ten minutesthere was a gentle knock at the door, and, on opening it, she saw CountRoumovski's discreet-looking servant, who handed her a noterespectfully, and then went on his way without a word.
How agreeable it must be to have well-trained servants to do one'sbidding like that! she thought, and then went back eagerly to herwindow to read the missive. It had no beginning or date, and was just afew lines.
I have observed the whole situation, and judged of the character ofyour fiance. I know how you feel. Do not be depressed--remain calm andtrust me, circumstances can always be directed in the hands of a strongman. I will have the honor to be presented to you and to your familysoon after you arrive at the Embassy to-night. All is well.
There was no signature, and the writing was rather large and unlike anyshe had seen before.
Suddenly her feeling of unrest left her, and a lightness of heart tookits place. She was living, at all events, and the horizon was not allgray. It seemed almost delightful to be putting on a real evening dresspresently, even though it was a rather homely white thing with a pinksash, and to be going down to the restaurant in it with Aunt Carolinein front in her best black velvet and point lace.
That lady's desire to be in time at the party alone determined her tothis breach of the rules--and there were Eustace and Uncle Erasmus intheir stiff clerical evening coats awaiting them in thecorridor--while, as luck would have it, the lift stopped at the secondfloor to admit the Russian. He got in with his usual air of beingunaware that he was not alone--though Stella could feel that he wastouching her hand--perhaps unconsciously. He seemed to radiate somekind of joy for her always, and the pink grew to that of a June rose inher cheeks, and her brown eyes shone like two stars.
"That was the man you spoke of in the hall, Mrs. Ebley, was it not?"Eustace Medlicott's intoning voice said, as they went along to therestaurant. "He certainly is a most remarkable person to look atclose--but I do not dislike his face, it has noble lines."
"Really, how condescending of you!" Stella almost said aloud. But theAunt Caroline answered serenely:
"Perhaps I am prejudiced, Eustace, but want of convention always shocksme to such a degree that I cannot appreciate anything else."
Stella almost enjoyed her dinner, she was so excited with the prospectof some unknown coming events, and she had the satisfaction ofobserving that once Count Roumovski actually turned his head in theirdirection and met her eyes. His were full of a whimsical smile for theinstant he looked, and then he relapsed into his habitual indifference.
The crowd had begun to thicken when they got to the Embassy, and theywaited among them for the Royalties' arrival; Stella looking ateverything with fresh, interested eyes. When this ceremony was overpeople began to disperse about the large rooms, and Miss Rawson wasconscious that her strange secret acquaintance was in conversation withthe Grand Duke and Duchess; she had not seen him come in. The AuntCaroline noticed this, too, and drew her attention to the fact.
"Look, Stella, that dreadful man is talking to Royalty!" she said. "Isuppose he must be a gentleman, after all--one never can tell withforeigners, as their titles mean nothing, and half of them are assumed.Your Uncle Carford had a valet once who afterward was arrested forposing as a Polish count."
"I should think anyone could see this man was a gentleman, AuntCaroline," Stella answered, "even without his talking to Royalties."
They were soon joined by the secretary cousin, who was charmed towelcome so pretty a relation to Rome, and was profuse in his apologiesfor not having been able to do more than leave cards upon them as yet.
"We should so like to know the names of the celebrities," Mrs. Ebleysaid, "especially can you tell us about the very curious-looking personnow conversing with her Imperial Highness; he is at our hotel."
"That--Oh! that is by far the most interesting man here--it is thefamous Count Roumovski. He is a most celebrated traveler; he has beenall over the world and Africa and Asia in unaccessible places. He is afabulously rich Russian--a real Muscovite from near Moscow, and he doeseverything and anything he pleases; he gives enormous sums for theencouragement of science. He is immensely intelligent--he lunched atthe Embassy to-day."
"Really!" said the Aunt Caroline, somewhat impressed. "His appearanceis greatly against him."
"Oh, do you think so?" said the cousin. "I think it adds to hisattraction, it is such superlative audacity. No Englishman would havethe nerve to cut his hair like that."
"I should hope not," said Mrs. Ebley severely, and dropped the subject.
"To think of this charming rosebud of a girl going to marry EustaceMedlicott--insufferable, conceited prig, I remember him at Oxford," thecousin was musing to himself. "Lord Carford is an old stick-in-the-mud,or he would have prevented that. She is his own niece, and one can seeby her frock that the poor child never even goes to London."
At this moment they saw the Russian Count putting his heels togetherand bowing himself out of the circle of his Royalties; and straight asa dart he came over to where their group was standing, and whispered inthe cousin's--Mr. Deanwood's ear--who then asked if he might presentCount Roumovski to the Aunt Caroline and the rest.
When this ceremony was over Mrs. Ebley found herself conversing withher whilom object of contempt, and coming gradually under the influenceof his wonderful charm, while Stella stood there trembling with thewildest excitement she had yet known. The words of Eustace, herbetrothed, talking to her, carried no meaning to her brain, her wholeintelligence was strung up to catch what the others were saying.
With great dexterity the Russian presently made the conversationgeneral, and drew her into it, and then he said with composure that theGardens were illuminated--and, as it was such a very hot night, wouldmademoiselle like to take a turn that way, to have some refreshment? Atthe same moment, Mr. Deanwood gave Mrs. Ebley his arm, and they allmoved forward--followed by Canon Ebley and the Rev. Eustace Medlicott,with no great joy upon his face.
Stella, meanwhile, felt herself being drawn rapidly ahead, and somaneuvered that in a moment or two they had completely lost sight ofthe rest of the relations, and were practically alone in a crowd.
"At last!" Count Roumovski whispered, "even I, who am generally calm,was beginning to feel I should rush over, throw prudence to the windsand--" then he stopped abruptly, and Stella felt her heart thump in herthroat, while her little hand on his arm was pressed against his side.
They made the pretense of taking some refreshment at the buffet, andthen went toward the open doors of the garden. The part all round thehouse was illuminated, and numbers of people strolled about, the nightwas deliciously warm. Count Roumovski seemed to know the paths, for hedrew his companion to a seat just beyond the radius of the lights, andthey sat down upon a bench under a giant tree. He had not spoken aword, but now he leaned back and deliberately looked into her eyes,while his voice, with vibrations of feeling in it which thrilledStella, whispered in her ear:
"It cannot go on, of course--you agree with me about that, do you not?"
"What cannot go on?" she asked, to gain time to recover her composure.
"This situation," he answered. "I am sure now that I love you--and Iwant to teach you a number of things, first in importance being thatyou shall love me."
"Oh, you must not say this," Stella protested feebly.
"Yes, I must, and you will listen to me, little star."
He drew nearer to her, and the amazing power of propinquity began toassert itself. She felt as if the force to resist him were leaving her,she was trembling all over with delicious thrills.
"I made up my mind almost immediately I saw you, sweet child," he wenton, "that you were what I have been waiting for all my life. You aregood and true--and balanced--or you will be that when I have made yourlove education. Stella, look at me with those soft eyes, and tell methat I mean something to you already, and that the worthy Mr. Medlicottdoes not exist any more."
"I--I--but I have only known you for two days," Stella answeredconfusedly: s
he was so full of emotion that she dared not trust herselffurther.
"Does time count, then, so much with conventional people?" he demanded."For me it has no significance in relation to feeling. If you wouldonly look at me instead of down at those small hands, then you wouldnot be able to tell me these foolish things!"
This was so true that Stella could not deny it, her breath came ratherfast; it was the supreme moment her life had yet known.
"You are frightened because the training of your education still holdsyou and not nature. Your acquired opinion tells you you are engaged toanother man, and ought not to listen to me."
"Of course I ought not to," she murmured.
"Of course you ought--how else can you come to any conclusion if you donot hear my arguments--sweet, foolish one!"
She did look at him now with two startled eyes.
"Listen attentively, darling pupil, and sweet love," he said. He wasleaning with one arm on the back of the bench supporting his head onhis hand, turned quite toward her, who sat with clasped nervous fingersclutching her fan. His other hand lay idly on his knee, his wholeattitude was very still. The soft lights were just enough for him tosee distinctly her small face and shining hair; his own face was inshadow, but she could feel the magnetism of his eyes penetratingthrough her very being.
"You were coerced by those in charge of you," he went on in a levelvoice of argument, which yet broke into notes of tenderness, "you wereinfluenced into becoming engaged to this man who is ridiculouslyunsuited to you. You, so full of life and boundless joy! You, who willlearn all of love's meaning presently, and what it makes of existence,and what God meant by giving it to us mortals. You are intended bynature to be a complete woman if you did but know it--but such a life,tied to that half fish man, would atrophy all that is finest in yourcharacter. You would grow really into what they are trying to make youappear--after years of hopelessness and suffering. Do you not feel allthis, little star, tell me?"
"Yes," Stella answered, "it is true--I have seemed to feel the cordsand the shackles pulling at me often, but never that they wereunbearable until I--spoke with you--and you put new thoughts into myhead."
"I did well, then. And because of a silly convention you would ruin allyour life by going on with these ways--it is unthinkable!" and his deepvoice vibrated with feeling. "It is a mistake, that is all, and can berectified,--if you were already married to this man I would not pleadso, because then you would have crossed the Rubicon, and assumedresponsibilities which you would have to accept or suffer theconsequences. But this preliminary bond can be broken without hurt toeither side. A man of the good clergyman's type will not suffer in hisemotions at the loss of you--he suffices unto himself for those; hisvanity will be wounded--that is all. And surely it is better thatshould gall for a little than that you should spoil your life. Sweetflower, realize yourself these things--that sunny hair and thatbeautiful skin and those velvet eyes were made for the joy and glory ofa man--not for temptations to a strict priest, who would resent theirpower as a sin every time he felt himself influenced by their charm.Gods above! he would not know what to do with you, heart of me!"
Stella was thrilling with exquisite emotion, but the influence of herstrict and narrow bringing up could not be quite overcome in these fewmoments. She longed to be convinced, and yet some altruistic sentimentmade her feel still some qualms and misgivings. If she should becausing Eustace great pain by breaking her engagement; if it were verywrong to go against her uncle and aunt--especially her Aunt Caroline,her own mother's sister. She clasped her little hands nervously, andlooked up in this strong man's face with pathetic, pleading intensity.
"Oh, please tell me, what ought I to do, then--what is right?" sheimplored. "And because I want so much to believe you, I fear it must bewrong to do so."
He leaned nearer to her and spoke earnestly. His stillness was almostominous, it gave the impression of such immense self-control, and hisvoice was as those bass notes of the priests of St. Isaac's in his ownnorthern land.
"Dear, honest little girl," he said tenderly, "I worship your goodness.And I know you will presently see the truth. Love is of God and isimperious, and because she loves him is the only reason why a womanshould give her life to a man. Quite apart from the law, whichproclaims that each individual must be the arbiter of his own fate, andnot succumb to the wishes of others, it would be an ethical sin for youto marry the worthy Mr. Medlicott--not loving him. Surely, you can seethis."
"Yes--yes, it would be dreadful," she murmured, "but Aunt Caroline--shecaused me to accept him--I mean, she wanted me to so much. I neverreally felt anything for him myself, and lately--ever since thebeginning, in fact, I have been getting more and more indifferent tohim."
"Then, surely, it is plain that you must be free of him, darling. Throwall the responsibility upon me, if you will. I promise to take everycare of you. And I want you only to promise you will follow each stepthat I explain to you--" then he broke off, and the seriousness of histone changed to one of caressing tenderness. "But first I must know forcertain, little star, shall I be able to teach you to love me--as Ishall love you?"
"Yes," was all Stella could utter, and then, gaining more voice, shewent on, "I did not know--I could not guess what that would mean--tolove--but--"
He answered her with fond triumph:
"Now you are beginning to understand, darling child--that is enough forme to know for the present. In your country, a man asks a woman tomarry him: he says, 'Will you marry me?'--is it not so? of course, Ineed not say that to you, because you know that is what I mean. Whenthese wearisome thongs are off your wrists you will belong to me, andcome with me into my country and be part of my life."
"Ah!" whispered Stella, the picture seemed one of heaven, that was all.
"You must have freedom to assert your individuality, Stella," hecontinued. "I can but show you the way and give you a new point ofview, but I will never try to rule you and drag you to mine. I willnever put any chains upon you but those of love. Do they sound as ifthey would be too heavy, dearest?"
"I think not," she said very low. "I feel as though I were looking intoa beautiful garden from the top of an ugly, barren, cold mountain. Ishall like to come down and go in among the unknown flowers."
"It will be so glorious for us," he said exultantly, "because we havestill all the interesting things to find out about each other,--" Andthen, her sweet face so very near him, the temptation to caress herbecame too intense; he quivered and changed his position, clasping hishands.
"Darling," he said hoarsely, "we must soon go back to the company,because, although I count always upon my will to make my actions obeyit, still I can hardly prevent myself from seizing you in my arms andkissing your tender lips--and that I must not do--as yet."
Stella drew herself together, the temptation was convulsing her also,though she did not guess it. She looked up into his blue eyes there inthe shadow, and saw the deep reverence in them, and she understood andloved him with her soul.
He did not so much as touch her dress; indeed, now that he had won hisfight, he moved a little further from her--and resumed his calm voice:
"The first thing we shall do is to stroll back through the people andfind the aunt--I will then leave you with her, and soon it will be timeto go home. Do not make much conversation with any of themto-night--leave everything to me. I will see the Rev. Mr. Medlicottwhen we return to the hotel. Whatever they say to you to-morrow, remainfirm in your simple determination to break your engagement. Argue withthem not at all. I will see your uncle in the morning and demand yourhand; they will be shocked, horrified, scandalized--we will make noexplanations. If they refuse their consent, then you must be brave, andthe day after to-morrow you must come to my sister. She will havearrived by then; she was in Paris, and I telegraphed for her to join meimmediately; the Princess Urazov she is called. She will receive youwith affection, and you will stay with her until the formalities can bearranged, when we shall be married, and--but I cannot permit myself tothink
of the joy of that--for the moment."
Stella's eyes, with trust and love, were now gazing into his, and herose abruptly to his feet.
"You may, when you are alone, again think that it is heartless to goquite contrary to your relations like this, because they have broughtyou up, but remember that marriage is an act which can mean almost lifeor death to a woman, and that no human beings have any right to coerceyou in this matter. You are of age and so am I, and we are onlyanswerable to God and to the laws of our countries, not to individuals."
"I will try to think of it like that," said Stella, greatly moved, andthen, with almost childish irrelevance, which touched him deeply, sheasked, "What must I call you, please?"
"Oh, you sweetest star!" he exclaimed, "do not tempt me too strongly--Ilove you wildly and I want to fold you in my arms--and explaineverything with your little head here on my breast--but I mustnot--must not yet. Call me Sasha--say it now that I may hear its soundin your tender voice--and we must fly, fly back to the lights--or Icannot answer for myself."
She whispered it softly, and a shiver ran through all his tallframe--and he said, with tender masterfulness:
"Say, 'Sasha, I love,'" and this she did, also--and then he almostbrusquely placed her hand upon his arm, and led her among the people,and so to her frowning relations, and then he bowed a correctgood-night.