Come on In!

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Come on In! Page 7

by Charles Bukowski

godawful stuff

  about the

  soul

  and I’d go to the

  window

  and look out and

  say

  “nice view but let’s

  work out.”

  “work out?”

  she’d ask. “what

  do you mean?”

  “I mean

  I’ll suck your tits

  and stuff.”

  “I want you to hear

  this new

  song.”

  she’d start right

  in.

  she had an awful

  voice but

  nice long

  hair.

  I’d get playful

  and hammer on the

  piano

  just so I wouldn’t

  have to listen

  to

  her.

  I was in a bad

  way: in between

  real women

  and just

  doing time

  with

  her.

  one night I

  asked her,

  “listen, how do you

  make it?”

  “make it?”

  “I mean

  how do you pay the

  rent, all

  that?”

  “oh, I’m a marriage

  counselor.”

  “really?”

  “yes.”

  “you been married?”

  “3 times.”

  I finally stopped going

  to her

  place

  but somehow

  she found out where

  I lived

  and then came

  to see

  me.

  she said we couldn’t have

  sex

  because she was going to

  be married again

  and didn’t want to be

  untrue

  to him.

  she described

  her boyfriend

  in detail

  to me

  then took out her

  guitar

  and started

  singing.

  later that night

  I sodomized her

  and told her

  not to

  come

  around any

  more.

  I got lucky:

  she

  didn’t.

  soon after that

  I met a plump

  Jewish girl

  who promised

  she’d

  save me from

  myself.

  I thought

  that would be

  a very good

  idea.

  sex sister

  there were 4 of them between the ages of 30 and 45 and

  all they talked about was men and sex, I mean,

  it was all-consuming, to them there wasn’t anything

  else.

  I was living with the youngest sister and she had me

  performing sexual acts I had never even heard of

  before.

  “now, let’s try this.”

  “all right.”

  at first it was lively, adventurous, even

  humorous

  but

  as the months passed and the nights added up I

  began to resent it, like—oh, here we go with SEX

  again!

  (she also liked to do it in strange places like public

  parks or in automobiles while I was driving.)

  I began to feel that all the sisters were crazy; in fact,

  one of them had been in a madhouse (the one I was with).

  the sisters had boisterous, screeching laughs, really

  rather ugly laughs

  and I began drinking more so I could tolerate

  them and their laughter.

  the drinking made the sister I was with quite angry

  because sometimes I would just go to sleep

  instead of performing.

  I finally told my lady that I couldn’t take it anymore

  and that it was over and she seemed to accept that at first

  but finally it was not to be so:

  she began to phone me continually, mostly at night,

  around 3 or 4 a.m.: “YOU’VE GOT SOMEBODY THERE,

  HAVEN’T YOU?”

  she followed me everywhere. once I took some clothes in

  to the cleaners and when I came out my car was nearly

  destroyed—ripped upholstery, shattered windows, torn

  dashboard, all within 3 or 4 minutes.

  it looked as if a tiger had been in the car.

  another time I was making love to another lady when my

  bedroom window was

  smashed open and there was the sister’s face, twisted, spitting

  at me, “YOU FUCKING BASTARD!” then she was

  gone.

  the lady in bed was terrified, trembling. “what was

  that?”

  “nothing, baby, nothing.”

  the sex sister also tried to murder me a couple of times in a couple

  of different ways and just missed both

  times.

  let me tell you that the police weren’t much

  help, they picked her up but she somehow convinced

  them that I was at fault.

  “there’s nothing wrong with that lady,” they told me,

  both times.

  two squads of officers.

  maybe she had sex with the whole gang of

  them?

  fortunately, as the months went on she gradually abandoned her

  terrorist attacks until finally it was just a weepy

  phone call or two and then a letter or two, then

  silence.

  she probably found somebody who could perform all the tricks that

  she had taught me and could probably perform them

  better. I hope

  so.

  and I just hope he likes sex

  62 times a

  month.

  to the ladies no longer here

  it’s just as well

  you should see me now

  driving to the racetrack

  a tiny German flag decorating the rear

  window.

  I dislike the heavy traffic on the

  boulevard and

  I drive through the back streets of the black

  ghetto.

  the years have gone by

  quickly.

  Death sits in the seat next to

  me.

  we make a lovely

  couple.

  a man finds consolation while driving

  and waiting.

  one consolation is

  how lucky I am

  that I never settled down permanently

  with any one of the

  ladies.

  driving along, that thought comes back to

  me and falls at my feet.

  Death picks it up

  looks at me

  shudders

  and quickly fastens his

  seat belt.

  the nude dancer

  she’s got a 6- month-old baby

  and a 9- year-old

  son,

  but

  she said

  it sure beats the factories.

  why do those guys just sit there and

  stare at that thing

  when a woman’s dancing? I

  asked.

  they memorize it, she said, then they

  go home and flog off. I danced last

  night and nobody watched me.

  they w
ere all watching some movie

  where this woman was fingering

  herself, and

  after I finished my dance

  I stood there and told them,

  you guys are going to go crazy watching that

  shit. you don’t know where you’re at

  anymore.

  you know, some of those guys freaked

  out? about 7 of them got up and

  left.

  no shit, I said.

  no shit, she said. I’ve worked 3 different places

  since I’ve seen you

  last. but it beats the factories and

  it beats the

  streets.

  at least you can catch a drink

  once in a while.

  yes, that’s right,

  I told her,

  that’s right.

  Ma Barker loves me

  lying in the sack in the dark

  sick from days of drinking.

  head hurting

  tongue thick.

  watching tv

  phone off the hook.

  tired of trying to relate to the

  female,

  I watch tv.

  the walls stacked up around me

  like shields.

  I watch these guys blasting holes

  in people

  with their submachineguns.

  they need money

  they have trouble with their molls

  things keep

  screwing up.

  I get up to piss during a tire

  commercial.

  when I get back the main guy is

  lying out in a field with his

  moll.

  there’s a stream below them.

  it’s peaceful but he has a cigar

  stuck into his mouth and a .357 magnum

  resting in his shoulder holster.

  the moll leans over him

  she has blonde wispy hair which flicks

  in the wind.

  she says, “Johnny, why don’t you give

  it up?”

  “give what up?” he asks.

  “you know, Johnny,” she says, “killing

  people and all that …”

  “now, baby,” he says, “I’m just trying

  to get by.”

  “you could give all that up, Johnny, we

  could settle down in a nice little place

  with a picket fence and have babies …”

  “ah, now, baby, that life ain’t for

  me.”

  “well, Johnny,” she smiles, “it’s either

  give it up or lose me …”

  he sits up

  pushes her away:

  “no, baby! you don’t mean that?”

  “yes,” she says, “I do , Johnny!”

  “I’m not going to live without you,

  baby,” he says

  takes out the .357

  jams it between her legs and

  pulls the trigger.

  I get up

  go to the refrigerator and

  get a beer.

  when I come back

  there’s a shaving cream commercial

  on.

  I drain the beer

  toss it in the basket

  put the phone back on the hook

  dial a number.

  she answers and I say, “listen,

  baby, I can’t have you around

  anymore, you

  get in the way.

  sorry.”

  I hang up

  take the phone back

  off the hook.

  time for another beer.

  I like gangster movies

  best.

  here we go again

  it’s stupid, I know, but I have an

  ability to feel happy for little or no reason,

  it’s not a great elation, it’s

  more like a steady

  warmth—

  something like a warm heater on a cold

  night.

  I have no religion, and not even a

  decent philosophy

  and I’m not

  stupid: I know that death will finally

  arrive

  but don’t consider even this to be

  a negative

  factor.

  which is to say that in spite of

  everything, I feel good

  most of the

  time.

  I appear to handle setbacks, bad

  luck, minor tragedies, without

  difficulty, my mood remains

  unchanged.

  much experience, perhaps, has taught

  me

  how to remain unmoved.

  yet there is one situation

  I can’t endure:

  a bitter, depressed, angry

  woman

  can still murder any

  good feelings

  that I might have—and

  just like that I despair and

  fall into a black

  pit.

  this occurs with some

  regularity and unfortunately

  in the wink of an

  eye I am sullen and

  depressed.

  and that’s stupid,

  I should be able to ignore

  female

  disorders

  even as the dark shit

  (that despite the dark shit)

  floods my

  brain.

  do you believe that a man can be taught to write?

  there was my cheap hotel; I was up on the 4th floor; I’d

  bring a lady in from the bar 2 or 3 times a week and we’d burst into that

  lobby like we wanted to wreck something, and the desk clerk, a really

  nice fellow, was terrified of me, I was big of chest and gut and when

  the writing was going badly, which it often was, upon

  entering with my lady, I’d take it out on the desk clerk: “hey,

  buddy, I think I’ll take one of your legs, twist it up the middle

  of your back and wind you like a clock!”

  I had him so scared he only called the cops once or twice and I

  had fun with the cops—barricading the door and listening to the dumb

  useless double-talk that cops liked to use; I always wore them

  down and they never got in.

  up there I stripped to my undershirt and shorts, I was nuts,

  had very muscular legs, strutted up and down the room saying, “look at

  my legs, baby! you ever seen legs like that?”

  I always pretended to be the toughest guy in town but

  when it actually came to fighting I wasn’t all that good: I

  could take a hell of a punch and didn’t have much fear but my own left

  hook and right cross were missing, and worse, I couldn’t seem to

  get the hatred going, it all seemed a joke to me, even when some guy was

  crushing my head against the edge of some urinal.

  but let’s forget all that! up on that 4th floor, I was best, the red neon

  sign near the downtown library flashing CHRIST SAVES, me

  strutting about and proclaiming, “nobody knows I’m a genius but

  me!”

  and all the time I was strutting I would glance over at my lady of

  the night, looking at those legs, those high heels, thinking, I’m going

  to rip the love out of those high-heeled shoes and those ankles and those

  thighs and that dumb pitiful face, I’m going to make her come alive!

  and poor Hemingway, I thought, never met dolls like I’ve met

  dolls!

  which was true.

  he would have walked away.

  hail and farewell

  as gentle as a butterfly

  fluttering in the

  murdered light

  you came through
here

  like fire singing

  and when it was over

  the walls came down

  the flags went up

  and love was finished.

  you left behind a pair of shoes

  an old purse

  and some birthday and

  Xmas cards

  from me all

  held together

  by a green rubber

  band.

  all well and good enough,

  I suppose,

  because

  when your lover is gone,

  thank the gods,

  the silence is

  final.

  weep

  weep for the indifference of flying fish

  weep for the absence of long-haired blondes

  weep for the sadness of yourself

  weep for Bach

  weep for the extinct animals

  weep for grandfather’s clock

  weep for weeping

  because no one cares

  the doors open in and out

  the lights go on and off

  teeth are pulled

  I forgive the indifference of flying fish

  I forgive the butterfly and the moth

 

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