by Edward Goble
“I don’t really preach any more. Oh, it’s not that I don’t want to, heavens sake I love good preaching. It’s just that I’m afraid yelling and jumping around may cause me to wet myself. That might prove awkward under the circumstances, because you might notice it before I did.” The old man was hilarious, and by the time he finally started to teach, the congregation was sore from laughing and clinging to every word. “So I’ll just sit here and talk and maybe you’ll hear something worth beans and maybe you won’t. Assuming my teeth don’t fall out and this stool doesn’t slide out from underneath me, we should all have a pretty good time, okay?” The congregation replied “Okay!” in unison, sounding like each person was surprised to find anyone else in the room, as it had come to feel like each one had a private audience with the good doctor.
“If you’ll turn to the Psalms, find number 78, I’d like to read a few verses. Let’s see, we’ll start with verse 70... These old fingers move pretty slowly now. I usually turn about fifty pages at a time, so be patient with me. Okay, everybody got it? Listen.” ‘He chose David his servant and took him from the sheep pens; from tending the sheep he brought him to be the shepherd of his people Jacob, of Israel his inheritance. And David shepherded them with integrity of heart; with skillful hands he led them.’ Psalm 78:70-72 (NIV)
“God chose David and took him from the sheep pens. You ever worked in a sheep pen? No? Well it’s a lowly job. It’s lonely and smelly and the kind of job most look past. Well, most, that is, except God. Because the lowly jobs of this world are the ones God keeps a keen eye on. For there in the sheep pens of the world are sometimes forged the best leaders the world has ever known. David certainly became one. Think of Abraham Lincoln, born in a tiny log cabin in rural Kentucky, or Billy Graham, raised on a dairy farm with dirt and dung in his fingernails. Greatness forged from simplicity. David began as a tender of sheep and God made him a shepherd of people - of His people. That’s quite a promotion if you ask me. From watching sheep to King of the Nation. Now that’s the fast track. So, what do you suppose God saw in the heart of this kid in the fields? What was it about this shepherd boy that captured God’s attention? Well, there were two things, actually. Look there. This is what God says about David. ‘And David shepherded them with integrity of heart; with skillful hands he led them.’ What God saw in the sheep pen was a young man who worked with integrity and skill, and He said, ‘Ah, now that’s a fellow I can use.’ And He made David King.”
“I believe,” Dr. Ray continued, “that these are two traits that are sorely needed in the world and, unfortunately, in the church today. Because we are a society spoiled by instant everything, and the time required to gain true skill is often passed over in favor of the short cut. It takes a long time to be able to fire a baseball from sixty-feet-six-inches with pin-point accuracy. That’s why boys start playing ball at six or seven years of age, throwing to each other, throwing into a tire hanging against a fence, practicing, practicing. They have coaches and teachers, and eventually, with practice and knowledge and personal discipline, they become Roger Clemens or Randy Johnson, and can throw the ball past you and into the catchers mit before you can say fast ball. Skill. And it it true in every profession, from parenting to preaching, from plumbing to pediatrics. If you want to be good, if you want to be the best, it’s going to take time, discipline, practice, education, humility and, as they say, a little blood, sweat and tears. These are the ingredients of skill. In terms of integrity, as we become less relational as a culture, personal integrity becomes less important as long as I achieve desired results. We don’t really know each other, so your life, your problems, sin, addiction or character is insignificant, your integrity doesn’t matter as much as your ability to meet my need. What a sad state of affairs. Because these things do matter. They matter to God and they should matter to us. Now, there are probably some seventh graders in the room who know a lot about mathematics. If I were to ask these students what an integer is, they would know in a moment. An integer is a ‘whole’ number. It is a whole, natural, entire number, it doesn’t have any enhancement, it is simply complete within itself. And this idea of integer is at root of the word integrity. And so, in the same way, a man with integrity is a whole person, someone without enhancement, he is complete. Integrity is a natural part of being truly human. If life were a tree, integrity would be part of the root system. Do you get it? It’s that important. And God, who does not change, is still looking for people like this - people of skill and integrity. These are the ingredients of true honor; this is the recipe for God’s favor - skill and integrity.”
Dr. Ray finished his talk and invited the congregation to come forward to talk to him about it. Dozens did, and he unhurriedly spoke with each one, praying with some and hugging most, nodding and understanding exactly what they were going through. One of the people waiting to talk with Dr. Ray was an old student, one he would never remember, a guy that had dropped out and disappeared. It was a formerly hard-headed kid from his freshmen Introduction to Christianity class named David Bean.
Chapter 26
Dave waited his turn, not accustomed to lines, watching Dr. Culbert touch each person, listen intently, comforting each one. This old man practiced what he preached.
“Dr. Ray?”
“That’s a familiar face. Help me with the name.”
“David. David Bean. I was in your...”
“Sure, David.” Dr. Ray smiled a wide, happy smile and embraced Dave like they were long lost friends. “How are you?” Dave wasn’t sure if Dr. Ray remembered him or not.
“I’m good. I had you for Intro. to Christianity way back when.”
“Oh, I remember, David. I’ve slowed to a waddle, but the memory remains a steel trap. Are you working here, with Madison?”
“No. I just moved here, I’ve been down in San Diego for a few years.”
“Well, it’s sure good to see you. Great to see you are doing well.”
“Doc, about that message. If a guy has been away, sort of living the life of the prodigal, can he come all the way back? You know - be the man of integrity and skill that God is looking for?”
“Well, think about David’s life - the other David,” he chuckled, entertaining himself with the connection. “After he became King, all was well with the world, until he committed adultery with Bathsheba and commissioned the murder of her husband. Now, did God accept him back after his sin was found out?”
“I guess. Yeah, it seems like he did.”
“That’s right. God accepted David back, because, in the same way that his leadership had integrity, so did his repentance. When he came back to God, he was genuine and transparent; he returned in integrity. The quality of his character was displayed in his sincerity and humility. And God embraced him. Make sense?”
“So there’s hope for us prodigals then,” Dave said, not quite as a question.
“There is indeed.” Dr. Ray gave Dave another giant hug and a kiss on the cheek. “I’m so glad to see you, David. Please, come up and visit me sometime. I’ll have you preach!”
“I don’t know about that. But yes, I’ll definitely come visit. Thanks, Dr. Ray.” Dave stepped back to allow access to the wise old owl, and he walked over to take a seat on the front row, not quite ready to leave, the thoughts in his head still fresh and important. Shani was working this morning. She had come the night before with Franny, and Dave had purposely given them space. He didn’t want to smother her. Now, sitting here in the dim chapel, his thoughts turned toward the message and the wisdom of his old professor. ‘Repentance with integrity.’ Whew. Deep water,” he thought. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, head bowed, his eyes examining the patterns in the carpet. “Father,” he began, “I don’t know if I have the kind of integrity you are looking for or not, but I know it’s the kind of man Shani and Franny need in their lives, a man of integrity, one who is whole and without enhancement, someone who is true... God. I want to be that man for them. Please help me.” He
looked up and saw a smattering of people still standing around the Doc and looked around to see the chapel was now nearly empty. He stuck his small Bible into the back pocket of his khakis and started up the aisle.
Chapter 27
Dr. Culbert spent Monday from about 10:00 a.m. till 2:30 p.m. in the Community Chapel offices where Paul Stone had reserved the conference room for him to speak with employees. There was a sign-up sheet circulated, and most of the slots were filled. At 3:00 p.m., Madison entered the front office doors, saying hello to the receptionist, and walking back through the hallway to check in with Mrs. Thompson. The conference room was empty as he passed by, so he knew the sessions with Dr. Ray were probably complete. As he approached the outer office, he heard Mrs. Thompson and Dr. Culbert inside laughing about something. He tapped on the open door, “Not interrupting, am I?”
“There’s the main man!” Dr. Ray said, standing and hugging Madison.
“We have been looking for you,” Mrs. Thompson added. “Weren’t sure which door you might come through.”
“On my day off I try to use the front door, if I come in. Helps remind me that I’m supposed to be off, you know, so I don’t get sidetracked and start working on something,” Madison explained. “We sure got some good reports from your teaching this weekend. Thank you so much. And, if you ever want to come down and help us full time, the door is always open.”
“Thanks, friend. This is a good church you’ve got here, and it’s a pleasure to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live here - too busy for me, Dr. Ray said, smiling.”
“Well,” Madison motioned for the door. “Shall we?” Dr. Culbert gave Mrs. Thompson one of his customary hugs, “You keep an eye on this guy,” he said. “Keep him in line.”
Mrs. Thompson rolled her eyes at the idea of such a daunting task, “I’ll certainly try.”
Chapter 28
“Do you drink coffee in the afternoon?” Madison asked.
“I’m old school, friend, I drink coffee around the clock. I can’t believe we pay the price for it that we do these days, but it really is better than ever - despite what my percolator generation might say.”
Madison pulled into the Starbucks between the church and his house, and made it around the car in time to help Dr. Ray out of the Rover. The easy chairs were open inside, and Dr. Ray sat down while Madison ordered their drinks and waited around the pick-up area distractedly till the drinks were announced.
“Not like the coffee shops in my day,” Dr. Ray observed as Madison served the drinks. “This is better. One of the ways the world has definitely improved.”
“You sound like your day has passed. Not from where I was sitting yesterday morning. I’d say you are hitting your prime.”
“Some things get better with time - coffee technology, wine, baseball cards - while others just get old,” Dr. Ray said.
“I’d put you in the first category.”
“Well, God be praised.” Dr. Ray raised his cup in a toasting gesture and then took a small sip. “So, tell me about Dallas?”
Madison took several minutes to fill in the gaps he left on the phone when he first set up the visit. “I’d say it was time well spent. I was a little distracted, I guess. I haven’t really taken a study trip like that before. But I would say it was positive - overall.”
“You know, that’s when it’s most important,” the old man baited.
“What’s that?”
“Integrity. That’s when it is formed and cultivated. When you are out there by yourself.”
“Like King David, up on the roof - by himself,” Madison said. “I know, I preached on a similar topic a while ago. I called it ‘Being in the Wrong Place at the Right Time.’”
“Right. Good title,” Dr. Ray said with his special brand of kindness. “Madison, May I ask you something personal?”
“Oh, absolutely. I’m an open book, you know that.”
“My friend, you seem distant.”
“Really? Well, I’ve got a lot going on, I suppose.”
“Mhmm.”
“The church is growing, Jill is pregnant, Billy’s out on summer break, the conference. There’s... Well, you know what it’s like. It’s just crazy.”
“I don’t see how you do it,” Dr. Ray said, looking directly into Madison’s eyes. “Is that it then, just a lot going on?”
“Just a lot going on.”
“Good enough.” Dr. Ray let him off the hook, and Madison could feel it. “So, I ran into your old friend, David Bean, yesterday after church. Great that he’s up here, huh?”
“Yeah? You know I haven’t spent much time with him yet, Jill has actually seen more of him than I have.”
“David is a good man, Madison, he always has been. He’s one of those men whom the Bible calls “men of valor.” In other words, he is a man of inner strength, and he doesn’t even see it. If I were to give any actual advice today, it would be to keep him close. Renew that bond you once had, become accountable to one another. I believe David is a trustworthy confidant.” A few moments of silence passed between the men. Usually, Dr. Ray noted, Madison has a laundry list of issues for which he desires input. Today - nothing. So Dr. Ray ventured out into another topic. “Tell me about the family. I couldn’t believe you and Jill were pregnant. It was so good to see her last night, and that little tiger of yours - heavens.”
“Well, like you saw, they are both great. Jill is handling all of this so well. I mean, we’re both going to be forty soon, and it’s pretty... pretty scary - for me at least. Billy will be eight, and we were just starting to get used to a pattern, as a family. She was helping out in the church, doing things she’s gifted to do, and then, POW. Now it’s morning sickness, extra sleep, swollen ankles... We’re not twenty-five any more.”
“So, how is your relationship?”
“It’s good. Being apart was tough. It was probably a bad time to go to Dallas. In hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have gone - for a lot of reasons.”
“For instance?”
“Jill, for one. I wasn’t home and she needed me. I’m off doing... whatever... and she’s here feeling crummy and shouldering all the weight.”
“Well, you had to go,” Dr. Ray said, casting the bait gently from his easy chair.
“Well, yes, I... No, I really didn’t have to go. It’s just that this conference is the biggest thing that’s ever happened to me, and I don’t want to blow it.”
“Okay,” Dr. Ray said, playing along. “Let’s say, for the sake of conversation, that this conference is indeed the biggest thing that’s ever happened to you. So if this is the biggest, is it also the best?”
“That’s a complicated question, Dr. Ray.” Madison’s compliant mind instantly started searching its resources for the correct answer. It obliged his request by sending up a million different images, some good, others not so good, from the file labeled Best Thing That’s Ever Happened To You. There was his Jill, Billy, a fleeting glimpse of Judy Turnbull, that he instantly brushed aside, his salvation, his church, his freedom to come and go as he pleased, the conference. “Definitely Jill. Jill and Billy and the baby,” he said, finally answering Doc’s question.
“Looked like a long list of things vying for prominence in there,” Dr. Ray said.
“No... just daydreaming, I guess.”
“Well, then, if the conference is the biggest thing that’s ever happened to you, and your family is the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Then, in your mind, does the biggest take precedence over the best?”
“No. No, it shouldn’t.”
“So, just as an aside, when you get to these points of decision, think about what the good path would be and think about what the best path might be and ask God for direction. Maybe you could have stayed home this time, and it would have worked out fine.”
“Thanks, Doc.”
“Madison,” Dr. Ray said as he drained the last of his coffee, “You’re a fine Pastor, and a good friend. Now, if I can just convince
you to take me to the airport, I think I might even remember you in my will.” They both chuckled and got up to leave.
Chapter 29
A housewarming party was not exactly the kind of event that Dave Bean longed for. Especially when it was his own house that was being warmed. When it is your house that is being warmed, it’s a completely different ball game. You have to be there the whole time, for one thing. And you have to entertain and answer questions. Not his idea of a good time. Shani and Jill had come up with the idea of having some people over to see Dave’s new house, maybe bring him a few plants and make him feel welcome. Dave had agreed to the event in what he described as a brief lapse of common sense. Shani and Jill spent the entire day, kids in tow, picking up party-goods while Dave spent the day cleaning. Actually, he’d hired Merry Maids to come in and give the place a good “once over,” which they did while he set up the sound system and puttered around, hanging mirrors and prints. His new place was a unassuming row house on Telegraph Hill with a two-car garage and a little garden in the back. It had been completely remodeled by the previous owners who had updated everything, down to the last washer and cabinet pull. Dave loved it. It was chock-full of the San Francisco charm that he had always loved. There was a produce market a block from his front door, a little Thai place just across from that, a used bookstore in the next block and coffee houses everywhere you turned.