by Mac Hyman
So we talked for a while and he said I could ride up front with them on the next trip, and then I asked about Ben, and he said, “Ben who?” and I explained to him that Ben was another one of his gunners, and he said it was all right by him, that it didnt make no difference to him one way or the other.
But when I went back and told Ben about it, Ben said, “No, I’ll stay in the back where I’m supposed to stay. I never seen officers care as little about things as this bunch does. I wish we had never got off the other crew myself.”
So I told him I would ride in the back too, but he said, “No, there aint any use in that. After all, the pilot is in charge of the plane and what he says goes, I guess, even if he dont seem to know what he is talking about half the time.”
But they warnt all that bad, I didnt think, and I really enjoyed watching them work when I flew up front. We took off that day about dark and Lieutenant Bridges got the plane off the ground real good and Lieutenant Gardella let the wheels up and done a right good job of it too, right smack up in the sides like he had been borned doing it; we went skimming out over the end of the runway and then Lieutenant Gardella got out a cigar and stuck it in his mouth and rared back and begun reading a magazine, while Lieutenant Bridges flew back over the field and then set it on the automatic, and then propped his feet up and leaned his seat back to go to sleep. I watched it all and it seemed like they done right good, and then I went back to talk with Lieutenant Kendall, the engineer, only he said he was sleepy and was getting his parachute under his head and sticking his feet out in the aisle trying to get comfortable. So I finally went back and set in the radio operator’s seat, because he hadnt showed up, and watched Lieutenant Cover while he navigated; and he was the one I wished Ben could have seen because he was probably the hardest-working man I ever seen in my life. He was bounding all over the back of the plane navigating even before it was over the end of the runway, peeping down tubes and looking out the window and writing things down on maps that he had scattered all over the desk, then grabbing up one of them three watches that he had scattered around and checking the time, and writing that down, and then taking this camera-looking thing he had, and running back to the dome and pointing it out at the stars that was just coming out, and then running back to write that down too. He wrote so fast and so hard that twice the lead flew off the pencil and flipped across the plane and nearly hit me in the eye; and another time he snatched up a map that had this weight on it that sailed across the desk and caught me right beside the head, so I got up and moved down a ways after that as it did seem right dangerous being close to him working that hard but I still watched him a good while and got a kick out of it.
Anyhow, I wished Ben could have seen it the way he went at things; he was so busy most of the time he wouldnt even talk to me. Most people that work hard usually like to talk about it a good bit, but when I asked him where he was navigating to, he snapped real quick, “Biloxi, Mississippi. Dont bother me, I’m busy,” and wouldnt even look at me. After a little bit, we was well on the way and it was dark and the plane was quiet the way it gets at night, with only the sounds of the engines and no lights to speak of except little blue dials and the lamp that come down over Lieutenant Cover’s head; but watching him work was enough to wear you out, so I got a little bit sleepy, and must have dozed off for a good while because when I woke up there was a big disturbance going on with people walking around and talking, and I didnt know what was going on.
Anyhow, I woke up and felt the plane going in these big circles, and then I looked over to the desk and there was Lieutenant Bridges standing holding one of the maps in his hand and looking at it, and Lieutenant Cover arguing with him, rattling papers around and trying to show him how he had figured this and that. Lieutenant Kendall was setting over there watching them with his chin propped up on his hands, and Lieutenant Gardella was up front flying the plane in these big circles, looking around every once in a while to see what was going on with the big cigar stuck out of his mouth; they was talking loud and everybody seemed real interested in it, and it seemed like Lieutenant Bridges knowed a lot about navigation himself even though he was the pilot. He was waving the map around saying, “I dont care what your figures show. I guess I can look out the window and see, cant I?”
“Well, you just check the figures for yourself,” Lieutenant Cover said. “I got a fix about thirty minutes ago and that showed us right here, and thirty minutes later, we’re supposed to be right here. You can check every figure down there. I figured that position by Dead Reckoning and I figured it thirty minutes from that fix, and I know it’s right!”
But Lieutenant Bridges kept on shaking his head and saying, “Well, by God, I can see, cant I? I can look right out the window and see, cant I?”
So they talked a good bit about navigation that way and both took a lot of interest in it, it seemed like. Lieutenant Kendall was setting back there listening to the whole thing and he was right interested too, even though he was the engineer, and so I stepped back there and asked him what the discussion was all about. And he said “What do you think it’s about? They’re lost again naturally. I been in this plane seven times and five of them we been lost. All I know is how much gas we got and if they want to know that, I’ll be glad to tell them, but I aint going to worry about it any more. They can ditch the plane or jump out for all I care; the only thing I know is about how much gas we got.”
Then Lieutenant Gardella called back and asked how much gas did we have, and Lieutenant Kendall said, “Tell him we can fly another forty minutes. I dont want to talk with him because every time we do, we get in an argument over where we are, and I’m tired of talking about it.”
“I know what you mean,” I said. “I dont like to argue about things neither, but it is good to see everybody taking such an interest in things; old Ben would be surprised to see it.”
“Who is Ben?”
“He’s one of the gunners,” I said. “He rides in the back of the plane.”
“Well,” Lieutenant Kendall said. “I hope he knows how to use a parachute.”
“Sho,” I said. “I bet Ben knows about as much about parachutes as anybody you ever seen.”
Anyhow we chatted a while and then I went back and listened to Lieutenant Bridges and Lieutenant Cover some more. Lieutenant Cover was still talking about his DR position where he said we ought to be; he turned to Lieutenant Bridges and said, “Well, who’s been navigating, you or me? I got a fix no moren thirty minutes ago and that means our DR position is right here, about a hundred miles out over the Gulf of Mexico . . .”
And then Lieutenant Bridges come in with his side of the argument, saying, “Well, I might not have been navigating but I got eyes in my head, and I guess I can look out the window right now and see we’re circling over a town half the size of New York; and according to this map or none I ever saw in my life, there aint a town at all in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico, much less one half the size of New York and . . .”
“Well, just look then,” Lieutenant Cover said. “Dont argue with me, just look. You can check every figure I got here. My DR position puts us . . .”
“Well, I dont care anything about that,” Lieutenant Bridges said. “All I want to know is what town we’re circling over, and if you can tell me that, we can land this thing because we cant fly here all night long while you try to tell me there is a town of that size in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico!”
So they took on that way for a while, and then Lieutenant Gardella and Lieutenant Kendall had a pretty good argument about one of the engines going out; so they discussed that a good while too until Lieutenant Kendall said, “Well, there’s not any sense in arguing about it; I’m going to feather the thing.” And after a little bit, they changed positions, and Lieutenant Bridges come up front and looked out and seen that one of the engines warnt working, and went back to see Lieutenant Kendall and they had a long talk over the engine being feathered too. Lieutenant Bridges said, “You are not supposed to go
around feathering engines like that. I’m the one that’s supposed to feather the engine. I’m the pilot, aint I?”
“Yeah, but you was too busy trying to navigate the plane when you’re supposed to be up there flying it and . . .”
“All right,” Lieutenant Bridges said, “but at least you could have told me we had lost an engine. I am the pilot, aint I?”
So they talked about that a good while too, and I set back and watched and listened, only I must have dozed off again because when I woke up, we was coming in for a landing. We hit and bounced once pretty hard so that I got throwed halfway across the plane, and then bounced again so that it throwed me back where I started from, but then grabbed on and didnt get throwed no more on the rest of the bounces. We taxied up the runway with the wheels squeaking and finally stopped and started getting out, but nobody was talking much by then except Lieutenant Gardella—he kept telling Lieutenant Bridges that he thought the third bounce was the smoothest of all, but Lieutenant Bridges didnt seem to care about talking about it none, and I noticed in a minute that none of the others did either.
Anyhow, we got out and they had this truck waiting for us and we got on that, and nobody was discussing nothing by this time, and I was right sorry for that because I wanted Ben to hear them because they was right interesting to listen to. But everybody just set there and then Lieutenant Cover come out with all his maps and everything folded up, and he got in and didnt say a word to nobody either. The truck finally started up and we headed across the ramp with everybody real quiet until finally Lieutenant Bridges leaned over and tapped Lieutenant Cover on the shoulder and said, “Look, Cover, I dont mean to run this thing into the ground, but I would appreciate it if you would try to find out where this place is. I mean if it is in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico, we’ve damn well discovered something.”
And then Lieutenant Cover said, “Well, the way you fly, it’s a wonder we didnt end up there anyhow.”
So we drove up and got off and everybody stood around for a while hemming and hawing, and Lieutenant Bridges went over and asked Lieutenant Cover again if he had figured out where we was, and Lieutenant Cover said, “I thought you was the one who knew so much about it. If you want to find out, why dont you ask the driver?”
But then Lieutenant Bridges said, “Ask the driver? You expect me to land a plane and then go over and ask a truck driver where I landed it?” and got right stubborn about it. But then he turned to me and said, “Hey, what was your name now?”
“Stockdale,” I said.
“Look, Stockdale,” he said. “How about scouting around here somewhere and see if you cant find out what place this is, will you? Be kind of casual about it, you know.”
So I went down the way and asked a fellow and he told me Houston, Texas, and I come back and told Lieutenant Bridges and he seemed to feel much better about things then. “Well, Houston aint such a bad town after all,” he said. “By gosh, Cover, you’re getting better every day. You didnt miss the field but about four hundred and fifty miles this time.”
Then Lieutenant Cover said, “Well, what I figgered was that you would bounce the rest of the way—it looked like it from the way we landed . . .”
And then Lieutenant Bridges had something to say to that, and after a while they begun squabbling a little bit, which I didnt like to hear. Me and Ben stood around waiting while they went at it and Ben said to me, “I never heered a bunch of officers argue so much in my life!”
“Yeah, Ben, they do now, but you ought to have been in the front of that plane and seen the way they worked. That was something else. If you could have seen that, you would have thought a lot more of them. Why, I’ll bet they are about as good a crew as you can find, when they’re sober like that.”
“Which aint often,” Ben said.
Anyhow, I hated for Ben to hear the squabbling and kept on talking to him until they had finished up with it because he got so disgusted about things like that. But they was finally finished; all of them heading across the ramp except Lieutenant Cover who had lost the argument because they had all jumped on him together before it was over—he was getting all his charts and stuff up and mumbling to himself. And I felt right sorry for him the way he had lost out on the argument and everything; I went over to him and said, “Well, I wouldnt worry about it none. I dont see how it amounts to too much. I had just as soon land at this field as any other one, and we aint going to be here but one day nohow . . .”
But he was right down on things and turned around and looked at me like he was almost mad with me, and said, “Look, do you want to check my figures? Do you want to check them and see for yourself? I got them all right here!”
“Well, I dont know nothing about it,” I said. “If you say they’re right, I guess they is.”
“I can show you my DR position,” he said. “It shows us right out in the Gulf.”
“Well, I wouldnt know about that,” I said. “If you say your DR position is out in the Gulf, I reckon that’s where it is all right. How long do you expect it to be out there?”
But he was pretty much down on things; he turned away and stomped off without even answering me—nothing you could say would make him feel any better.
18
But after supper, it looked like things might work out some better. Me and Ben went over to see Lieutenant Bridges and them and they were all setting around the room and had a couple of bottles on the table and were getting along fine together. When we come in, Lieutenant Bridges was saying that he didnt care if he was in Houston, he thought Lieutenant Cover was a good navigator, and Lieutenant Cover said he didnt care if Lieutenant Bridges did almost bounce the plane off the runway every time he landed it, that he were right satisfied with somebody that just knew how to get the thing on the ground. They kept passing the bottle around and then they noticed me and Ben there and offered us some but Ben didnt drink and I didnt care for none either; so we stood around until they started to squabbling some more again, and then me and Ben left and went in town to a picture show. Ben was right disgusted with them all again because he said that warnt no way for officers to act, and I said, “How’s that, Ben?” and he said, “Drinking and arguing and taking on like that. Officers dont do that. Besides, if they do have to act like that, they ought not to do it around us because we are enlisted men. I dont know what makes that bunch do that way. They dont act like officers at all.”
Anyhow, after the show we went back by their room again to find out what time they were taking off the next day, only we didnt find out much because they was still at it. They was arguing pretty hot this time and had finished up a couple of bottles that lay on the table and had opened up another one, and I dont reckon they even knowed me and Ben was there. Lieutenant Bridges was talking to Lieutenant Kendall about the engine going out and wanting to know why. He said, “You’re the engineer, aint you? You’re supposed to know those things.”
“Was I flying the plane? Did I do anything to make it go out?”
“That dont matter, Ken. You’re supposed to fix it.”
“I never wanted to be a flight engineer nohow,” Lieutenant Kendall said. “What I wanted to do was run an Officer’s Club.”
So then Lieutenant Cover wanted to drink to all the men that run the Officer’s Club, but Lieutenant Gardella wouldnt because he said they all wore mustaches and that he knowed one that had a mustache two inches long; but then Lieutenant Cover said he knowed one that didnt have a mustache and so Lieutenant Gardella said he would drink to that one all right. “Did you ever see the one at Baker Field?” Lieutenant Cover said. “That man had the biggest ears of any man I ever seen. You remember him? He couldnt get them under the earphones. He would have to tuck them in. He was a Major.”
“Let’s drink to him too.”
“I remember one time,” Lieutenant Cover said, “he had these real small earphones, and he couldnt get all of his ear under them, and he worked and worked . . .”
“Well, let’s drink to him too,” Lieuten
ant Gardella said. “You all the time talking. Dont you ever want to drink to anybody? Why dont we stop all this talking about people and do some drinking to them?”
So they all begun arguing some more, so me and Ben never found out a thing, and finally just left there and went back to our place and figgered we would get out there early in the morning and meet them there. Well, we got there about seven o clock and set around about two hours before any of them showed up, and once I looked at them, I kind of wished they hadnt showed up at all. Lieutenant Bridges’ hair was sticking straight up on his head and what you could see of his eyes was all red, and he had his parachute on backward so that it hung down in front of his stomach and mighty near tripped him every step he took. He come waddling along that way, giggling silly about something that Lieutenant Cover had said, and we went up to speak to them and none of them even knowed us at first. Then the others come along and they looked just about the same as Lieutenant Bridges; they had been up all night long and they acted the silliest of any bunch of grown men I ever saw in my life. Ben wouldnt even look at them he was so disgusted. There was a truck there waiting for us, and when we got up, Lieutenant Bridges stood up on the back of it and held his nose like a kid ready to jump in swimming and hollered, “Here’s the way I’m going to bail out!” and went jumping way up in the air and falling on his back hard enough to break it, it seemed like; and then Lieutenant Cover stood up and he had his suit on backward too, and he yelled out, “Well, here’s the way I’m going to bail out!” and then he went sailing through the air too and hit flat on his back on the cement too; and they laid there with their backs nearly broke, kicking their feet around in the air and laughing their silly heads off.
It looked like we never would get started, and from the looks of them I didnt much care if we didnt. I looked at Ben and his face was all white and his eyes popping out, so I guess he felt the same as me. The driver of the truck had his head poked out the window looking at them because he couldnt start with them laying all over the runway, and there didnt seem to be no way to get them all on at the same time. I mean Ben didnt like it too much neither. They warnt the best crew on earth sober, and drunk, I dont guess they’s ever been another one like them. I looked at Lieutenant Gardella, though, and thought it might work out all right because he was the only one that had his parachute on right; he was sitting there pretty quiet holding a lunch pail in his lap, and was just watching the others and not saying a word about it one way or the other. When they come climbing back up in the truck, grunting and puffing, he just stared at them and held his lips tight together and shook his head sideways, disgusted. And when they climbed up on the side and held their noses and went sailing out in the air again, Lieutenant Gardella didnt say a word; he just reached back and patted his chute on his back like he was making sure it was on in the right place. He warnt taking on and giggling like them at all, so I turned to Ben and said, “Well, maybe Lieutenant Gardella can do it all right. He lets them wheels up real good, I know,” and Ben kind of nodded his head, though he was still right pale; but about that time Lieutenant Gardella stood up and looked around at us and said right quiet and serious, “I thought they had better sense than that. Now here’s the way you really ought to bail out,” and dived off head first the way you are supposed to. He hit on his face and it knocked him out for a while and we finally had to get down and haul him back on the truck.