by Abby Ayles
“I believe that you and I both know that the children were distracted, and my lessons were mussed, because of your presence,” she said. “I am well aware that those children are worth time and investment, and I give them all of mine,” she said. “It is not I who is failing them in that regard.”
The Earl shot Emma a fiery look of warning.
“You are once again interfering in that which is none of your business,” he said.
“When you stand here accusing me of neglecting the children when it is you who is guilty of that, it becomes my business very much,” she said.
“Those children do not deserve such callus and abandonment from their own father. I know well how it feels to be desperately lonely because there is no family to be there. You are alive and well, yet you behave almost as if the children do not exist. Why?”
Emma stopped cold. Her irritation had gotten the better of her, and she had said far too much. She felt the color drain from her face as she saw the raw fury on the Earl’s face.
At that moment, she understood that she would be fired immediately. She stood paralyzed, unable to move or speak, and awaited her fate.
After several long moments, the Earl spoke.
“Lessons are finished for today,” he said, his voice full of venom. “Go and eat lunch with the children or go back to your room, but I do not want to see you for the rest of the day or at supper tonight. I will have a tray sent up to you at 7 p.m.”
Emma nodded slightly, still unable to speak. She willed her legs to move and let her flee from the room because she knew he meant for her to vanish from his sight at once, but she barely managed to take half a step.
“One more thing,” he said, his glare still burning through her. “If you can be more respectful and focused tomorrow, I might be inclined to consider keeping you on as the children’s governess.”
He paused and took a step toward Emma. “However, as of this moment, you will be on a trial period, which means that you are subject to having your position terminated at any time, as determined solely by me. And I will be watching parts of your lessons every single day, to ensure that you do your job. Is that understood?”
Tears began to sting Emma’s eyes, so she averted her gaze and nodded.
“Good. Now, go,” the Earl growled.
For a moment, Emma feared that she would still be incapable of moving, and she nearly sobbed with relief to find that she had control of her feet once more.
She rushed from the room and ran to her own, closing the door forcefully behind her. She was terrified that after he had had more time to think, he would go on and fire her, despite telling her he would keep her on as a trial period.
However, she was also still angry with him. He had a family who loved him and needed him to be there for them, yet he refused. She had not meant to blurt out what she had said about family, but she had meant the words.
She missed her family dearly, and it made her furious that someone could be so blind that they would willingly abandon their family, especially when they needed him so desperately.
She curled up on her bed. She thought again about Marcus, and about how much worse things were getting with him. If she did lose her job, she would lose all hope of being able to fix his situation.
That thought refreshed the overwhelming wave of emotions she had been feeling since the Earl first entered the children’s room that morning. She lay there on her bed, arms wrapped around herself, and cried for what felt like hours.
Once her tears had ceased, she pulled herself from her bed and walked over to her washbasin. She splashed the fresh, cool water on her face, and dried it with a clean white cloth.
In the mirror, she could see that her eyes and face were red, but the water helped ease the fierce burning of her cheeks. She stared at her reflection for several moments. She needed her job, and she felt more every day that the children needed her.
As she dabbed at her eyes with the cloth which she had dampened with the cold water to reduce the tear-induced puffiness, she made a decision.
She would not lose her job. She knew that she could do her job very well, as long as she ignored Francis Blackburn. And that was exactly what she was going to do.
Chapter 6
Francis went to bed that night seething, but also full of guilt.
He felt now more than ever that Emma had no business attempting to interfere with the way he chose to rear his children or speaking to him as though she were his equal.
However, he also felt that she was right about the way his lack of interaction with his children was affecting them. He had noticed that Rowena looked perpetually sad the few brief times he saw her, and Winston hardly looked at him anymore.
Yet despite this, he could not bring himself to spend more time with them. They reminded him more and more of their mother every single day.
The governess, however, could not be more Caroline’s opposite. Her brazen attitude and blunt way of speaking often infuriated him.
After his confrontation with Emma, he had expected to find that she had left on her own accord in the night. Yet instead, he had found her in the children’s room the next morning, teaching and interacting with the kids, almost as though the previous night’s conversation had never happened.
In the weeks following their conversation, however, Francis noticed that he did not see Emma as much around the house.
She took her meals either with the children or in her room. Even the necessary interactions between them were very brief and very to-the-point. He considered speaking to Emma about her sudden aloofness but decided against it.
In those weeks, as he sat in on the lessons, Francis began to take notice of just how beautiful and intelligent Emma was. He even heard her doing voices for some of the characters in the stories Emma read in class, and discovered that she was quite witty and clever, as well.
Yet he had to keep reminding himself just how infuriating she was as well, which made him disgusted with himself.
How could he possibly be attracted to her?
He told himself that it was all the pressure on him to remarry that was making him take notice of Emma in such a way. After all, Emma would never make a suitable match for him. Not only was she irritating and meddlesome, but she also came from a family of lower status.
Even before the deaths of Emma’s parents, it was well known amongst London society that the Baker family was not doing well financially. Francis knew that, if she took the job as his governess, it had to mean that her already diminished finances must be even worse now than everyone believed.
Francis thought it odd because he knew that she had an older brother.
He and Marcus had attended the same boarding school a few years apart, and he knew that Marcus should be there picking up the slack in the family’s financial struggles. Yet she had not made any mention of her brother or the reason for her having to shoulder the family’s financial responsibilities.
It seemed to be quite the mystery, which had Francis very intrigued. He decided to invite Emma to join him for breakfast the following morning so that he could ask her about him.
After the quiet tension that had passed between them the past few weeks, Francis expected Emma to require some convincing to join him. To his surprise, she accepted.
They made small talk throughout breakfast. Francis had stopped sitting in on the lessons several days prior, so he asked after the children’s progress. Emma seemed surprised that he had asked, but she was happy to tell him how well the lessons were going and how well the children were doing.
As the meal neared its end, Francis cleared his throat.
“How is your brother faring these days?” he asked. “He and I attended the same school as boys, and I have not seen him as of late.”
Emma’s eyes grew wide, and for a moment, Francis thought she might faint.
“I have not spoken to Marcus in some time,” she said. Francis studied her suddenly pallid face carefully.
“I do hope all
is well with him,” Francis said.
It was clear that Emma was uncomfortable talking about her brother, but Francis could not imagine why. As far as he knew, Emma and Marcus had always been really close.
He wondered what might have happened to change that.
“He probably has himself cloistered away in the townhouse in London, penning his novel,” she said quickly. “He has been secluding himself often lately so that he can finish it.”
Francis fell completely silent. From what he knew of Marcus, he was never much for reading. Furthermore, he detested writing and, as far as Francis knew, was not very good at it.
Emma was lying.
“Miss Baker, I am sure that your brother has a great many skills, but I know for a fact that writing was not one of them,” he said, his face hard.
The governess flushed a deep red, and Francis knew that his assumption was correct.
Whatever Marcus Baker was doing, it had nothing to do with writing some novel. And, if Emma was going to such trouble to keep it a secret, it most certainly was not good.
“What is it that you are hiding, Miss Baker?” he asked. He intended to find out the truth.
“I do not know what you mean,” she mumbled, refusing to meet his gaze.
“I believe you know exactly what I mean,” he said, growing angry.
“Forgive me, my lord, but I must go tend to the children’s lessons,” she said, rushing from the table.
Francis rose to follow her but thought better of it. He did not want to upset the children by causing a scene in front of them. He resolved to get to the bottom of the matter by the end of the day.
He tried several times to discretely get the governess’s attention while she taught lessons that day but to no avail. She had thrown herself completely into the lessons and seemed either unable or unwilling to notice him.
He noticed, too, that once the lessons were finished for the day, Emma stuck very close to the children, keeping herself occupied with their activities.
That night, Francis waited for Emma just outside her bedroom door. Luck was on his side, and he caught her by surprise, managing to remain just out of sight until she was mere steps from her door.
“I do not abide by liars,” he said, obviously startling her.
“What do you—” she began.
“And if you wish to remain here, in my employ, you better tell me what it is that is really going on with your brother,” he said, touching her arm to keep her from fleeing as she appeared ready to do.
The governess appeared shocked at the touch – shocked enough to let it linger. Then the surprise faded, and she flinched away from him.
“Alright, yes, I lied to you about Marcus,” she said.
“Why did you lie?” he asked.
Emma took a trembling breath.
“Because what it is that is going on with my brother is a private matter,” she said. This time, she did meet his eyes, and he saw that there were tears in hers. “I am not allowed to speak of it. So, please, do not ask me to discuss it any further.”
With that, she pushed past him and into her room. When she went to shut the door behind her, Francis did not stop her.
The matter was far from closed, however, as far as he was concerned. And if his governess would not tell him what he wanted to know, he would do some digging and find out for himself what it was she was hiding.
If Marcus had done something to bring shame to Emma’s family, he would personally see to it that Marcus was set straight. If it was something else, he would do everything in his power to take care of it.
Despite the threat he had made to fire her if she continued lying to him, Francis did not wish to lose Emma. He did not believe that her lies were born from nefarious intentions. He could also plainly see that whatever was happening was causing her a great deal of emotional distress.
And, if he were being honest with himself, the governess had managed to make him warm up to her and actually care about her, despite how drastically she had initially gotten under his skin.
Chapter 7
Emma had spent weeks doing exactly as she’d intended and largely ignoring and avoiding Francis.
After Francis confronting her about her brother, Emma had expected Francis to persist with his desire to force Emma to tell him the truth. Much to her surprise and relief, however, he did not.
In fact, he seemed to be going out of his way to be kinder to her, and even making himself less scarce around the children. She had been surprised by his sudden change in demeanor, and she found herself blushing more often when in his presence.
One afternoon, while Emma sat on the floor of the children’s bedroom playing games with them, Rowena surprised Emma by throwing her tiny arms around Emma’s neck.
After the first couple of weeks of Emma’s employment, the children had begun warming up to her rather quickly. However, neither of them had as yet initiated such a grand gesture of affection toward her.
Feeling equal parts surprised and pleased, Emma laughed and embraced the little girl.
“To what do I owe this honor?” she asked.
Instead of giving Emma an immediate reply, Rowena simply looked at Emma for a moment, smiling.
“Are you going to be our new mother?” the little girl asked.
Emma blinked, her eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
“What makes you ask such a thing?” she asked.
Rowena looked at her brother, then back at Emma.
“Because we have seen Father much more ever since you arrived,” Rowena said. “We think he likes you.”
At this, Emma blushed furiously.
It had never crossed Emma’s mind that the Earl might have taken a different kind of interest in her beyond that of his children's governess. Until now, she had merely thought that the Earl had at last realized how important his relationship with his children was.
Yet something that the children had observed led them to believe that their father might, indeed, have a much different interest. Was it possible that there was more to his sudden shift in his behavior?
“Row,” Winston said. “Aunt Rosaline is likely going to be our new mother.”
“Aunt Rosaline?” Emma asked, looking at Winston. Emma had never heard any of them mention a woman named Rosaline.
“Winston, aunt Rosaline cannot be our mother,” Rowena said matter-of-factly. “She is already our aunt.”
Winston sat deep in serious thought for a moment.
“Well, if that is true, then why did we overhear Grandfather mention the idea to Father?”
Rowena shrugged.
“Maybe Grandfather forgot that she is our aunt,” she said.
Emma covered her mouth to hide a smile. The exchange between the siblings was amusing and innocent, and her heart swelled with adoration for them. However, she could not help feeling a weight beginning to settle in her chest.
If Francis did marry their aunt, what would become of her? Would he and his wife still wish to keep her on as the children’s governess? Or would Rosaline wish to choose another governess, one more satisfactory to her preferences?
Emma felt a remote sadness tugging at her heart as these thoughts swirled around in her mind.
She thought again about what Rowena had said about the Earl smiling and interacting more since the beginning of her tenure as a governess. Looking back on the last few weeks, she recalled a few occasions where Francis had stumbled over his words or forgetting what it was that he was about to say as he spoke to her and, when he thought she was not looking, had given her what had appeared, to her, to be speculative looks.
Although she could not admit it to herself, some part of her understood that this combination of mixed emotions could be translated as jealousy as well as the concern for her job security.
However, she was forced to admit that she found herself quite frequently flustered and caught off guard by the Earl’s presence, particularly in the first week or so of his attending the children’s lessons.
She had initially believed it to be because he intimidated and frightened her, and she supposed that was true. But she also could not deny the extremity of the effect that his physical attractiveness, or the effect that his smile, on the few occasions in which he had chosen to show it, had had on her.
She had often had to forcefully redirect her attention because she caught herself staring at Francis like a lovesick child.
She only hoped that she was the only one who had noticed her intensified attention to his features in those moments. She certainly hoped that she was the only one who knew that she foolishly hoped that Francis could help her out of her financial predicament.