by Susan Stoker
“Koren—” Taco began, the pain easy to hear in his voice.
She took a step back and held up a hand. “No. You’re right. It’s fine. We’ll take a break. That’s what you want to hear, right? Okay. You can go now. Don’t worry about me. Besides, it’s probably better this way. I’ve never been involved in anything like this. I told you from the get-go that I don’t do drama. And this is definitely drama. So you can go with a clear conscience. We’re good. Great. Peachy.”
She saw a muscle in his jaw tic before he took a step toward her. “I changed my mind.”
“Nuh-uh. Too late. You can’t.”
“You’re right. I was a dick. I was too stuck in my head. I couldn’t see what was right in front of my face.”
Koren didn’t want to know. She just needed him to go so she could break down in peace.
He kept walking toward her, and Koren kept backing away. He couldn’t touch her. If he did, she’d break. She knew it. “You wanted to break up with me, and you did. So just go.”
“We’re not broken up.”
“Jesus, Taco! Could you be anymore flakey? Just go already! I can’t deal with all this drama. I haven’t gotten any work done today and I have a ton of emails that I need to get to. I was fielding calls all day from the others. It’s obviously not good for my productivity. So you can just tell everyone that we’re over and they’ll stop calling and texting. I can finally get some work done.”
He didn’t say anything, just kept stalking her until her back hit the wall next to a large bookcase. Koren put up her hands to try to stop him, but he kept coming. In order to keep from touching him, which would make her give in, Koren flattened her palms on the wall behind her.
Taco was in her personal space now. She could feel his body heat and smell the slight scent of soap. He’d taken a shower recently, and normally the scent of his soap made her weak in the knees. Today it made her weak for an entirely different reason. She was sure this would be the last time she’d be this close to him. Smelling him.
“I’m sorry, Kor.”
She shook her head. “Too late, Taco.”
“Unacceptable.” He looked down at her hands on the wall and frowned. “I hate this.”
When he didn’t elaborate, she asked, “What?”
“You’re not touching me. Not grabbing my shirt as if you’ll never let go.”
Koren’s fingers twitched, but she forced herself not to move.
He lifted a hand and brushed a lock of hair behind her shoulder. “I’m sorry. You’re right. All of it. I was a dick. I was inconsiderate and stupid. I thought I was keeping you safe by staying away, but all I was doing was putting you in more danger. We’ve spent enough time together recently that whoever is doing this probably knows we’re a couple. I should’ve called. I should’ve let you know what happened. And more importantly, I should’ve contacted one of your brothers and asked if they could come and stay with you until I got home.”
Koren swallowed hard, the huge ball of emotion in her throat making it hard to breathe.
“I know this is all too much fucking drama. Believe me, I know. I hate it, probably more than you do, and I feel completely helpless because I don’t know what to do about it. If I just knew why this was all happening, it’d be easier to deal with. I haven’t been a saint, but I’ve racked my brain to try and figure out what I should be sorry about, and the only thing that comes to mind is my ex. I’m definitely sorry that I ever went out with her, that’s for sure, but is that what all this is about? I just don’t know.
“All I could think about, the whole damn day, was that I was the reason this was happening to my friends. I wanted to keep you out of it. But that’s impossible, because you’re already in it. Because I’ve spent every minute with you when I’m not at the station. Because you’re mine.”
“Please,” Koren whispered. “Stop.”
“I love you, Koren,” Taco said.
A sob escaped, and Koren pressed her lips together and squeezed her eyes shut. Her fingers curled, but she couldn’t get a grip on the wall. She felt Taco take her wrists and he placed her hands on his sides.
“I fucked up. Bad. I was trying to be all noble and shit, but breaking up with you is the last thing I want to do. In fact, if I had my way, you’d move in with me, lock, stock, and barrel.”
She couldn’t help it, her fingers grabbed hold of his shirt at his waist and she held on. She was breathing as fast as if she’d just run a mile, and her heart felt as if it was going to beat out of her chest. Koren kept her eyes closed, not yet ready to face him, to have him say he was kidding.
“It won’t happen again,” Taco said softly. He framed her face with his hands and his thumbs wiped away the tears that had escaped. “I’m scared, Koren. Fucking petrified. Today was a close call. I’m well aware that if something happens to Smokey, we could lose Penelope forever. She wouldn’t get over that. And whoever is doing this is escalating. Today it was a few chickens that lost their lives, but what about tomorrow? A shed is one thing. A car another. But now we’re talking something more. Bigger. It scared me. I can’t lose you, Koren. I just found you. I’m finally happy for the first time in my life. I understand exactly how much I have to lose. And the thought made me crazy.”
Koren finally opened her eyes. The look in Taco’s made her knees weak.
“You hurt me,” she whispered.
“I know. And it won’t happen again. I mean, I’ll do my best to make sure it doesn’t. I’m sure I’ll do stupid stuff in the future, but I swear to you that I won’t purposely keep you in the dark with what’s happening ever again.”
Koren didn’t want to give in. Wanted to stay mad at him. But ten minutes ago she’d been hoping against hope that she’d hear from Taco soon. And now he was here, and she was being stubborn.
Then what he’d said earlier registered fully. He loved her.
He hadn’t said it in a way that made her think he was trying to manipulate her. He’d said it, and then explained what had been going through his head earlier that day.
She wasn’t ready to say it back. Not after what he’d put her through. But she had no doubts that Taco wouldn’t say the words if he didn’t mean them. He hadn’t had the best role models in his parents. But he saw how his friends acted with their fiancées.
“Are you hungry?” she asked in a voice that only quivered a little.
He let out a breath, then rested his forehead against hers. “Yeah.”
“We could go out, or I could make stuffed peppers.”
“Stuffed peppers,” he said immediately.
“Okay.”
“Okay,” he echoed. Then he picked up his head and wrapped his arms around her. He pulled her into him and simply held her.
The embrace felt good. Koren knew without a doubt that they’d been on the verge of never seeing each other again. If he’d walked out of her condo, that would’ve been it. They’d fought, but she hoped they were now stronger as a result.
She still didn’t want to be in the middle of any kind of drama, but it wasn’t like Taco was purposely generating it. No, someone else was orchestrating these attacks.
A thought struck her then. “It seems to me that, with your friends, the dramas they went through involved their girlfriends. Adeline’s boss, Beth’s agoraphobia, the crazy doctor at Sophie’s work, the guys who wanted to get back at Blythe, Quinn’s birthmark…but this time, it’s your drama that’s the issue.”
Wincing, Koren regretted putting her thoughts to words the second they came out, but Taco didn’t get upset with her. He didn’t tense up and didn’t pull away. He merely huffed out a breath.
“Right. Lucky me.”
She smiled and shoved a hand under his shirt and caressed the warm skin of his back. “I’m sorry, Taco. What I meant was, this isn’t your fault anymore than their dramas were theirs. And honestly, your drama is my drama. I’m sure I’ll have my share of it in the future. My parents aren’t exactly subtle and my brothers are a pain i
n my ass. Not to mention, Vicky, Sue and I like our nights out. So you’ll have to deal with plenty from me in the future.”
“I can’t wait,” Taco said. “I’m going to do my best to mitigate whatever is happening. I don’t want you involved, and I need to make sure you’re safe. You were exactly right earlier. I should’ve been moving heaven and earth to make sure you were covered, instead I had my head up my ass. It won’t happen again.”
“I hope that doesn’t mean you’re going to go overboard,” Koren warned. “I’ve lived on my own a long time, and I’m not about to go into lockdown mode over a threat that we don’t even understand or know where it’s coming from.”
Taco frowned. “But that’s exactly why you should go into lockdown mode.”
Koren shook her head. “No. I’m not saying I’m not going to be careful. I am. My doors will stay locked at all times. If I have to go out, I’ll carry mace and, if possible, I’ll call one of my brothers or my friends to go with me.”
“Deal. And when I’m not on duty, I want you to stay with me.”
Koren knew she was blushing but she nodded. “I had planned on that regardless.”
He smiled. “Good. I like having you in my bed.”
“And I like being there,” she returned.
“Come on. I’ll help you get dinner ready.”
Koren nodded, and when he twined his fingers with hers and led the way to the kitchen, she let out a sigh of relief. Everything within her relaxed. She’d come close to being broken. Taco leaving would’ve broken her. But luckily they’d both been able to meet each other halfway. They’d learned a lot about each other today…and hopefully they wouldn’t have another scare like that again.
Koren wanted to be with Taco, but she also needed him to want to be with her right back. She wouldn’t settle for being the only one making an effort in a relationship. She needed Taco to fight for her as much as she was willing to fight for him.
Chapter Fifteen
Three days later, Koren was drinking a glass of white wine and catching up with Sue and Vicky. Taco was on shift, and he’d texted her on and off all day, and she’d talked to him twice.
Beth was doing her best to try to figure out anything and everything she could about Taco’s ex-girlfriend’s followers. Jen was in jail, but most of the men and women who’d been with her when Quinn had almost been burned alive had gotten off with much lighter sentences or no jail time at all.
Any one of them could be holding a grudge for their leader being locked up, so Beth was digging into all of them. It was slow going, even for Beth, which was frustrating for everyone.
Penelope and Moose were back at work as well, but Smokey was currently being watched by Adeline when Penelope was on shift. There was no way she was going to leave her pet alone again, and from what Koren had heard, Smokey wasn’t that thrilled at being separated from Penelope.
If people could suffer from PTSD, Koren had learned that animals could as well. The miniature donkey had been traumatized by once more being caught in a fire. Taco had described the sounds coming from the animal as horrifying and heartbreaking at the same time. Adeline’s service dog, Coco, seemed to be the only thing keeping Smokey calm when Penelope wasn’t at his side.
Koren knew the other women were either holed up together or visiting relatives. Everyone was taking the threat of more arson attacks seriously, but not knowing who might be next in the line of fire, literally, was unnerving.
Once more, the arson investigators had determined that the barn fire had been deliberately set, but they didn’t have any clues as to who might’ve done it. The police were “looking into it,” but Koren had a lot more faith in Beth than she did the cops. Not that they weren’t doing everything they could, but Beth didn’t follow the same set of rules the police had to obey.
Koren knew it was killing Taco that his friends had been targeted. No one knew if the person behind the fires was going to work his or her way through the rest of his friends, or if Taco himself would be the next target.
Sledge, Squirrel, and Driftwood were on high alert because nothing of theirs had been torched yet.
“I can’t believe how crazy all this is,” Sue said.
“You don’t know the half of it. At one point, your name was brought up as possibly being involved,” Koren told her friend.
“Oh, jeez. That thing in college, right?”
“Yup. But I explained what happened back then and admitted that Vicky and I were there too, but we weren’t caught.”
“It was stupid,” Sue said. “We’d all had too much to drink.”
“I know,” Koren said and patted her friend’s knee.
“So they really think it’s related to his ex-girlfriend? The one who was setting people on fire to ‘save’ them?” Vicky asked.
“I guess. Taco doesn’t know what else he’s supposed to be sorry about. He swears there’s no other reason for someone to be pissed at him. And I believe him.”
Sue wasn’t listening, instead looking down at her phone.
“What are you doing?” Koren asked. “Beth’s already on the case. I’m not sure you have the skill set needed to track down crazy Jen’s followers,” she teased.
“Shut up.” Sue grinned. “I’m not looking up Jen or any of her psycho followers. I’m cyber-stalking your boyfriend and his friends.”
“Sue!” Koren scolded. “You’re married.”
“I might be married, but I’m not dead. And if I get turned on by looking at pictures of hot firemen, my husband is the one who benefits.”
Vicky and Koren both laughed.
“Seriously. Like, look at this one,” Sue said, turning her phone around to show them. “Tell me that’s not hot as hell.”
Koren had to agree that it was. Sue had found a picture of Moose. It was taken from behind, and he had a hose slung over his shoulder and there was a large fire in the background.
“Or this one,” Sue said, quickly turning her phone around, scrolling for a second, then showing her friends again.
This time, she’d found a picture of Sledge and Crash. They were high atop one of the ladders in a bucket, manning a hose. Water was spraying everywhere and the looks of concentration on both men’s faces was intense…and hot.
“How are you finding those?” Vicky asked, pulling out her own phone.
“You guys, stop it,” Koren scolded.
“I tried a bunch of search words, but the ones that worked the best are ‘Station 7 San Antonio’ and ‘San Antonio firefighter.’ Most of the pictures that come up seem to be taken by a local news station, and I can’t tell if they’re from Station 7 unless the photographer got the helmet in the picture, because they have a big 7 across them, but at this point, a hot firefighter is a hot firefighter.”
Koren rolled her eyes at her friends and got up to grab the bottle of wine from the fridge. She came back into the living room and refilled all of their glasses. As much as her friends exasperated her, Koren wouldn’t change them for the world.
“Look at this one,” Vicky said, showing the others her screen.
“No, this one!” Sue exclaimed.
Koren sat back and put her legs up on the coffee table. She knew better than to try to stop them now. Eventually they’d get tired of their new little game, and they could talk about serious stuff again…like when they were going to have their next girls’ night out, and if Koren could invite all the firefighters’ fiancées.
Vicky and Sue went on for several minutes more, trying to outdo each other with the pictures they found on the Internet of sexy firefighters. “Okay, this one is a little sad, but… Hey! I think this is Taco,” Vicky said, showing her screen to Koren.
Koren grabbed the phone from her friend. Sue came out of her chair and sat on Koren’s other side. Both friends looked over her shoulders as she enlarged the picture.
It was Taco.
He was carrying a child out of a house. The kid looked unconscious, as the arm not against Taco’s body was drooping
bonelessly to the side. Taco still had his face mask on, but she could still see the intensity in his eyes when she zoomed in. His last name was blurry on his uniform, but since she knew what she was looking at, she could totally read it.
“Holy shit. When was that?” Sue asked, tilting the screen her way.
“I’m not sure. Hang on, let me read the caption,” Koren told her.
She zoomed back out and her eyes scanned the words accompanying the picture. There wasn’t much there, but the date was just weeks before she’d had her own accident and had been rescued by Taco. “This was before we met at the grocery store,” Koren told her friends. “Not too long before we met, actually.”
“Hey, I didn’t know his name was Hudson. That’s a badass name. How come he doesn’t use it?” Sue asked.
Something about her friend’s question made Koren hesitate. “What?”
“Hudson Vines. I didn’t know that was Taco’s name. It’s cool. How come he goes by the silly nickname Taco when he has such a great real name?” Sue asked again.
“Bad history with his family and his name,” Koren said absently. Then a thought struck—hard. “Holy shit.”
“What?” Vicky asked.
Koren quickly saved the picture to her friend’s phone, then immediately went to her picture folder and texted it to her own cell. She shoved the phone at Vicky and grabbed up her own.
“Koren?” Sue asked.
Holding up a finger, Koren ignored her friends. She saved the picture to her phone and immediately sent a text of her own, attaching the picture.
She clicked on Beth’s name and brought the phone up to her ear.
“I haven’t found anything yet,” Beth said in lieu of a greeting.
“I just sent you a text,” Koren told her. “I need you to look at it. Maybe it’s nothing, but maybe it’s something.”