“Or gifts,” he said.
“I like your gifts. It’s just that they’re so extravagant.” He’d overwhelmed her with the gifts he’d given her during the last three months. Some of the gifts were jewelry, which she half expected, but others were sentimental. Such as her mother’s classic ’69 Mustang, which had been sold to a collector to pay off some of their debts years ago. The collector had put it in storage and left it intact; their mom had been the last one to drive it.
She had so many memories of that car. Sometimes she just sat in the backseat and felt a little closer to her mom. Even Dare had been rendered speechless by the car.
He rubbed the diamond tennis bracelet that he’d given her earlier this evening. “I like you in diamonds.”
“Is that why you insisted I wear the choker tonight?” she asked, lifting her free hand to touch the band of diamonds around her neck.
“Yes,” he said, parking the car in his assigned spot. “Now, tell me what you were really thinking about.”
She sighed. They were getting too close to each other. He saw parts of her that she normally hid away.
“You know me too well.”
“Not yet. But soon I’ll have all your secrets figured out.”
“I’m not sure I like the sound of that.”
“Why not? Don’t you trust me?”
She did trust him on one level. She knew that, unlike Lucinda, Jeremy would never reveal anything personal about her to the world. But that didn’t mean that he was planning to stick around for the long haul. And if he still left after three months, she was going to have to deal with the fact that her trust in him had been misplaced.
“Ah, that’s a telling silence,” he said. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking from his tone. He was a master at hiding his emotions. She wished she had that same ability. Everything she felt seemed to be broadcast like a twenty-four-hour news channel.
“It’s not so much that I don’t trust you.”
“Then what is it?”
She took a deep breath. How could she say that every day they spent together made her wish time could stand still? “I’m afraid of what will happen when you’re gone.”
“Your secrets will always be safe with me.”
“Yes, but I won’t always be with you and I’m not sure I’m ready to think about that.”
He pulled his hand free and got out of the car without another word. She watched him walk away from her. His stride was angry and she couldn’t blame him, but they both had to acknowledge that there was a clock ticking as far as their relationship was concerned.
And so far he hadn’t made any overt indication that he was interested in keeping her around any longer, despite their growing closeness. She wasn’t going to pretend that her life was one thing when she knew it was something else.
Jeremy heard her footsteps behind him and turned to make sure her heels didn’t get caught in the tiny cracks between the boards on the dock. He shouldn’t have left her alone in the car. The flash of anger had surprised him.
Even as a child he’d always been even-keeled. But with Bella so many reactions were unexpected. Even their lovemaking, though satisfying, always made him yearn for her again.
“Jeremy…”
There was a sadness in her voice that he couldn’t stand hearing. He knew that she’d only given him the truth he’d asked her for. He had the same fears. Sharing so much of himself with her was bound to leave them both hurting when the relationship ended.
“No more talking tonight.”
“I didn’t mean to ruin the evening.”
He was being an ass and he knew it. “You didn’t. I’m just not ready to talk about our relationship being over.”
“Me neither,” she said softly.
He walked back to her. “Wait here.”
He went back to his car and grabbed their overnight bags from the trunk, then locked it. Bella stood on the dock looking out to sea. She was good at keeping her true feelings and thoughts to herself. Too good.
The only time he felt her guard drop was when he made love to her.
He didn’t say anything, just walked with her to his slip and lifted her aboard his boat. He untied the lines that held the boat in place and then climbed aboard. She took their bags to the stateroom as he prepared to leave the marina.
“Do you want a drink?” she called from below deck.
“No,” he said. What he wanted he doubted he could ever have. He wanted everything she had to give. He wanted it from the safety of the relationship they had.
He knew that wasn’t fair. But he’d designed this relationship so he’d have all the advantages. He was only now realizing he’d forgotten a few things.
“Are you going to stay mad at me all night?” she asked from right behind him. Her hair blew around her face and shoulders in the light breeze. The skirt of her dress swirled around her legs.
“I don’t know,” he said honestly, because watching her standing there brought home to him how far out of reach she really was. He could hold her and make love to her, but it was temporary.
“I’d rather go home than spend the night with you acting like this.”
Screw that. He wasn’t going to waste one night of the three months they had left together. He wanted her by his side for all of them. “I don’t want you to go home.”
She smiled at him, that fey little grin that he never could read, and took a few steps closer to him. “I don’t want you to be sulky.”
“I sound like an eight-year-old when you put it that way.”
“Well…” She stopped in front of him, placing her hands around his neck. She rested her body against his and spoke softly against his skin. He felt each word the instant she said it. “You don’t resemble an eight-year-old.”
He wrapped his arms around her, lowering his head to the top of hers and just breathing her in. He rested his hands at the small of her back, nestling them together until not an inch of space separated them.
“I’m acting like one?” he asked, brushing his lips along the column of her neck. He traced the line of the choker with his tongue. God, she was beautiful. If she ever had an inkling of how he felt toward her…fear gripped him. He didn’t want to let her go. Not tonight. Not in three months. Not ever.
“I guess I was being pretty childish, too, keeping secrets,” she said, tipping her head back so that their eyes met.
But she hadn’t been. He knew how hard it was for her to let anyone close to her, despite the fact that she had a large circle of friends. There were very few people that she actually let know the real woman.
And he wanted to be one of those few.
She trailed her fingers over his jaw, then down his chest. She laid her head there, right over his heart. He tightened his arms around her. Held her as close as he could without saying a word.
He didn’t want to talk anymore. Why had he started a conversation that went where he didn’t want it to go?
“In the car, I was thinking about this.”
“Making love?” he asked, leaning down to kiss her. Sex was on his mind most of the time when they were together. Hell, even when they were apart he was thinking about how it felt to have her in his arms. The soft sounds she made when he thrust into her body and how she wrapped herself around him when they finished.
He lifted his head, brushing his lips along the curve of her cheek down to her neck. He suckled at the smooth, soft skin, wanting to leave his mark there. Wanting in some way to brand her as his so that everyone she met knew she was taken.
Taken by him. His, he thought. Really his, and not just for a few months.
She smiled up at him. “In a way.”
She took a step away from him, wrapping her arms around her waist and staring out at sea. He hated how she could isolate herself from him in one movement. He stepped up behind her, pulling her back against him.
“What way?”
“I was thinking about how quickly the last three months have gone by, and wishing that the
next three months never had to end.”
Jeremy smiled at her, but words stuck in his throat. Could he risk being that honest and open about wanting her?
Ten
Jeremy woke the next morning, scrubbing a hand over his face and staring at the woman lying curled so close to him. Her confession last night had set a fire in him he hadn’t been able to put out. Something had started winding its way unexpectedly into his life.
She’d organized a couple of parties for him, acting as his hostess. He knew she did some business at the parties, drumming up new clientele, but mainly she acted the way his mother always had at his father’s business functions. And that unnerved him.
He wasn’t ready for their relationship to end, yet at the same time those three months couldn’t come fast enough. He felt like this relationship was unraveling, and he had no idea how to get it back on the track he’d planned.
He pushed himself out of bed—because he wanted to linger.
“Jeremy?”
“Right here,” he said, sinking back down next to her. If he wasn’t careful they’d spend the rest of the weekend together on the boat, in bed.
“Is it morning already?” she asked, leaning over to kiss his chest. He shifted so that he lay next to her, his morning hard-on pressing against her hip. He shouldn’t want her again so soon. He’d had her three times last night.
“Yes.” He took her mouth with his, letting his hands wander over her body.
Her stomach growled and he laughed. “Hungry?”
She buried her red face against his chest. “Yes. I didn’t eat at the party last night.”
“Maybe that’s because you kept trying to avoid Lucinda.” He pulled the sheet back from the bed and reached for one of the silk bindings he’d used to tie her to the bed the night before, trailing it over her torso and breasts.
She shivered with awareness and her nipples tightened. He arranged the silk binding over her breasts. “I wish you hadn’t noticed that.”
He leaned down to lick each nipple. Then he blew gently on the tips. She raked her nails down his back.
“Are you listening to me?” she asked.
“To your body,” he said.
He knelt between her thighs and looked down at her. “Open yourself for me,” he said.
Her legs moved but he took her hands in his, brought them to her mound.
“Lift your hips, honey.”
He leaned down, blowing lightly on her. She lifted her hips toward his mouth.
He drew her flesh into his mouth, sucking carefully on her. He pushed his finger into her body and lifted his head to look up at her.
Her eyes were closed, her head tipped back. Her shoulders arched, throwing her breasts forward with their hard tips, begging for more attention. Her entire body was a creamy delight.
He lowered his head again, hungry for more of her, using his teeth, tongue and fingers to bring her to the brink of climax, but held her there, wanting to draw out the moment of completion until she was begging him for it.
“Jeremy, please.”
He slid deep into her. She arched her back, reaching up to entwine her arms around his shoulders. He thrust harder and felt every nerve in his body tensing. Reaching between their bodies, he touched her between her legs until he felt her body tighten around him.
He came in a rush, continuing to thrust into her until his body was drained. He then collapsed on top of her, laying his head between her breasts.
He turned his face away from her, afraid to admit that something had changed between them overnight, but knowing that he wasn’t going to let her go. He was going to find a way to keep her at his side.
The next few months flew by. Jeremy became a part of her life in a way she hadn’t predicted. After their intense night together, neither of them had mentioned the contract or the fact that they didn’t want to end their relationship after six months.
But that didn’t bother her. Jeremy was everything she’d always wanted in a man and more. She didn’t know when her dreams for the future had been reborn. But she found herself thinking of long-term plans instead of dwelling on what had been taken from her.
This afternoon was a perfect example. It was Jeremy’s birthday and she’d planned a surprise party for him. Kell, despite his initial misgivings about her, had warmed considerably in the last few weeks and had helped her with the guest list. The party was going to be at her home.
She’d never have been able to do this with his circle of friends even a month ago. But it had felt right for this event. Jeremy seemed to like her house, and catering a party for him at his place felt too presumptuous. She really wanted this to be a special day.
He was turning thirty-five, a milestone that he’d mentioned to her one time and then let drop. His parents were flying home early from Europe to come to the party. They had been surprised when she’d called. Apparently Jeremy hadn’t mentioned her to them.
She was a little nervous about that. She’d never met his parents, and she knew she and Jeremy weren’t really dating.
“This place looks great.”
She glanced at Dare. She was always a little startled to see him looking like a man. For so long he’d been that half-wild boy with eyes that broke her heart. Now she saw wisdom and maturity in him. “Yes, it does. Did you get those extra bags of ice?”
“Yes. And I made another run to the liquor store, so the bar is overstocked. Quit worrying, sis. You’ve thrown thousands of parties.” He put his arm around her shoulder and they stood together in the living room of her home.
“But this one is different,” she said. She’d never really hid anything from Dare. Not this Dare anyway. The teenage rebel he’d been hadn’t been interested in anyone except himself.
Dare looked at her like she was crazy. “You really like Mr. Harper?”
“Yes, I do.”
He hugged her close and then went over to the mantel to adjust a framed picture of the two of them from last summer. “I’m glad, Bella. I’m really glad.”
“Why?” she asked. It wasn’t like Dare to adjust anything.
“It makes it easier to take that job in New York.”
She had an inkling of where Dare was going with this conversation. “Why would it?”
“Because you won’t be alone.”
She shook her head at him. “I’m never alone. I have a very busy life.”
“Yes, you do. But you didn’t have anyone to take care of while I was gone, and now you do.”
His words gave her pause. Was that the main attraction she felt toward Jeremy? The fact that he let her take care of him, and she’d been searching for a long time for someone who would? “He’s good to me, too.”
“Glad to hear it.”
The doorbell rang and soon the party guests started arriving. Daniel and Lucinda arrived in the midst of her friends from her weekly dinner. She didn’t have to greet them individually, but Bella was tired of avoiding her childhood friend. Tired of running from the lies and the hateful things they’d both said.
Lucinda was standing in a mixed group of some of her friends and Jeremy’s business partners. Bella started over toward the crowd. Lucinda glanced up at her and excused herself from the others to meet her halfway.
“Bella, thank you for inviting me.”
“You’re welcome. I…well, I’m sure you noticed I’ve been avoiding you.”
Lucinda laughed, and it was a kind sound. It reminded Bella of their childhood and how much fun they’d once had together.
“Yes, I have. I think I had something to do with that. I’m sorry for telling Kell and Daniel the details about your dad.”
“I wish you hadn’t,” she said. But Bella was surprised that she didn’t feel that knot in the bottom of her stomach that she always had when she thought of someone finding out about her past.
“Well, I did. It was in bad taste and I have no excuse except that I was so shocked to see you. Last time I saw you, you and your mother were cleaning my house.”
There was something in Lucinda’s voice that Bella had never noticed before. It sounded almost like anger. “Why does that bother you?”
She shrugged. “I hate what your dad did. He stole my best friend from me. And I’m still mad at myself for not being a better friend to you.”
“I don’t think I could have handled it then. I felt so destroyed and unsure of myself.”
“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for how I acted back then and for bringing it up again.”
Bella forgave her friend, knowing that a portion of the blame sat on her own shoulders. “Don’t worry about mentioning it to Kell. He researched me on the Internet anyway.”
Lucinda started laughing and Bella noticed Daniel glancing over at them. “He did the same thing when Daniel and I started dating.”
“I guess we can’t fault him for caring about the men we like.”
Lucinda took her hand and drew her into a corner away from everyone else. “I’m glad you’re with Jeremy, but…”
“What?” she asked, almost afraid to hear what Lucinda might say.
“Be careful with your heart, Bella. Jeremy always moves on.”
“I know that. But I think maybe I’m changing his way of thinking.”
“I hope so. I’m looking forward to having my old friend back in my life. Even if things don’t work out with Jeremy,” Lucinda said.
Bella was, too. She’d renewed many acquaintances from her childhood these past few months and it had felt right to be back in that circle. Some of the people she had nothing in common with, but others were turning into good friends. It had made her realize how much she’d missed the social part of her old life.
The door opened before she could respond and Jeremy walked in. She saw the surprise on his face as everyone broke out into a chorus of the birthday song. He didn’t greet his parents or his friends first but made a beeline to her side, pulling her into his arms and kissing her.
Everyone broke into applause and Bella felt like she’d found something that she’d spent a lifetime searching for. And she was certain that Jeremy realized it, too.
Six-Month Mistress (The Mistresses Book 2) Page 9