by Lexy Wolfe
“She cannot be.” With a grim expression, Seeker pointed out, “Only those who existed during the time of punishment for your Trisari could be one of those you seek. Because she did not have her anchor stone, she has to be a new soul.” He washed the root down with water, but his face continued to reflect his distaste for it. He briefly explained the purpose of the crystals as the Totani had told them.
Nolyn opened his mouth, then shut it with a shake of his head. “I will save my curiosity about Citali for later.”
“Thank you,” Terrence and Seeker stated in unison.
The mage made a face, squinting at the younger man. “I would ask if you aren’t curious, too, but I imagine you’d rather be feeling better than assuage your curiosity.” Terrence opened his eyes to look at Nolyn, then closed them, smiling faintly. “Right. So, if she’s a new divine servant, what is she? A Totani or a Trisari or something else?”
“What…does it…matter?” All three looked over at the pained voice to see the winged woman attempting to push herself up. Her arms kept giving out for short moments, making her appear like a drunkard trying to get off the floor. “Mother told me…what the strong do…to the weak. Is what I am…how you will decide…who rapes me?”
The men looked confused for several moments. As what she said sank in, both mages caught Seeker as he grabbed the hilt of his knife, his face flushing in insult. “Relax,” Nolyn stated in a calming tone. “She has cause to worry. Not all men are honorable.” He continued in a louder voice, addressing the woman. “Why do you think we’re going to do anything to you?”
She raised her head, her expression suspicious. “You are mortals. Why aren’t you?”
“We did not fight you, so you did not lose a battle to any of us,” Seeker responded in flat tones, crossing his arms. He turned to Nolyn and Terrence, feeling their stares on him. “It is Desanti tradition. Having another stand in for a duel is allowed, except for Swordanzen. Though the Swordanzen traditions will likely change with Githalin Storm il’Thandar’s guidance. Territorial battles between tribes are different. Everyone fights. It is not like you northerners who think weak women are not useless.”
Nolyn exhaled loudly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “And I want to be the liaison between our peoples.” He shook his head, quirking a wry smile at a chuckling Terrence. Turning his regard back to the winged woman, he asked, “What is your name?” He rolled his eyes at her suspicious glare. “Unless you would prefer we come up with something to call you ourselves.”
“Nachalya,” she supplied grudgingly.
Seeker tilted his head with a faint frown. “That is a very old Desanti word for ‘dawn.’ It has not been used for many generations.”
“It is the name my father gave me.” She gathered her cloak around her hunched shoulders. The garment covered her wings and obscured her face. “He is very ill.”
“What is wrong with him?” Terrence wondered.
Nachalya looked away for several moments before speaking again. “I do not know. Neither does Mother, but she is certain he is dying. She allowed me to leave to seek aid, but only with the promise I allow no one to see me. I had been searching for many days before I felt I needed to return.” Her shoulders slumped more. “It felt so hopeless. I just…I yelled begging for someone to help Father.” Her voice sounded wounded and childlike. “And then you fell out of the sky.”
Terrence sat bolt upright, staring at her. “You called out for help…for your father? Right before I got here?” She nodded. He clasped one of her hands in both of his, face filled with earnestness. “I had…Wh-what…is his name?”
Nachalya looked up, her devastated expression hinting at puzzlement. “Father’s name? Thandar.”
Seeker and Nolyn nearly hurt themselves when they heard. “Thandar?” the pair echoed.
“He is here?” Seeker grimaced at the ripple of reaction he felt from Anibu. Nolyn caught him by the arm before he grabbed her. “You must take us to him!” She cringed away from the man, trembling with fear. Terrence put himself between the Swordanzen and Nachalya, his tired expression disapproving.
Nolyn tugged him away, his tone calm and encouraging. “Seeker, come. Let’s go try to find anything more edible than those roots.” He did not flinch at the glare the darker man turned on him. “It will give them both a chance to rest so we can travel to where Thandar waits.” With clenched teeth and fists, the warrior spun on his heel and stalked out of the cave.
Nachalya looked up, her eyes wide. “You…know Father? But how is that possible? Are you not mortals?” She tilted her head, puzzled when Terrence pressed her hand to his forehead, his shoulders shaking, the sounds he made a twist between laughter and crying. “What is wrong?”
“Nothing,” he managed to say after several moments. “Nothing is wrong. I had no idea it was you I had to find. I did not even know what this was when it was given to me.” He reached for her other hand that still held the crystal in a tight grip. “We both cried out for help at the same time. Your anchor stone resonated with both of us. It led me to find you here.”
She said nothing, opening her hand uncertainly to study the glittering crystal, then looked at him, putting her other hand over his heart. “…I still feel you. Your heart aches so. Whose suffering hurts you so much?”
He closed his eyes, bowing his head. “A very dear friend and my chieftain. Her name is—”
“Storm?” Her eyes dilated. The surprise in his eyes answered her question. “Your friend. She is the one Father has been grieving for?” When he nodded, her eyes filled with tears. With only a moment’s more hesitation, she threw her arms around his neck. “I so ashamed,” she stammered through sobs.
“Why?” he asked, his voice catching as he put his arms around her waist. “Because you had given up hope? You thought it was impossible to succeed?” He managed a smile when he felt her flinch, ignoring his own tears. “Don’t. If we had not, we may not have found each other.” He tightened his embrace. “We will not lose them.”
THE AIR BEGAN to thin by the time the group finished their climb. A tiny tree grew in the center of a pool of water fed by a spring flowing through a crack just above the surface along the wall.
Nachalya ran into the foyer-like overhang toward a wide cavern entrance in the shadows, pulling Terrence after her. Nolyn and Seeker followed several steps behind, breathing heavily from the exertion. “Mother! Mother, come quickly! I found help for Father!”
The willowy figure that emerged stopped short in shock. Hair the color of spun sunlight flowed around her with the quality of living water. Pure white bird-like wings trembled against her back. “You-you are Forentan!”
Nolyn’s eyes were drawn to the elegant pendant in the familiar shape of his own signifying the capitol region he served. “Trisari Thesrial?” He did not bother to try hiding his astonishment. “Why are you here so far from Forenta?”
She took a step back as the two stragglers neared Nachalya and Terrence. “Wh-who are you? Why do I feel…why do I feel a connection to you?”
“This is Nolyn Lirai, Edai Magus of Verusia,” the Illaini Githalin introduced, waving his right hand to the man, the sleeve of his travel robe falling back to reveal his Illaini mark.
Thesrial covered her mouth with her hands, shaking her head in denial. “No…no, no, no! You are Illaini?! The great mother…” She choked on a sob. “She cannot know of me!” She turned and fled inside.
Nolyn covered his eyes and sighed. “Dear gods. Is it going to go this way every time we find a Trisari?”
“I do not care about her,” Seeker snarled, his eyes flashing with malevolence. “Where is Thandar?”
Terrence put his hand against Seeker’s chest, his expression flint-like. “Enough! Show respect to Thandar’s daughter and his mate, Anibu. Without either of them, we may never have been able to find him.”
The Swordanzen bared his teeth, his eyes no longer deep brown but Anibu’s pale blue as the Totani spoke through him directly. “I want to see
him! We must know—” He clenched his fist, looking away. “If I do not see, Aelia will not believe I speak true. I cannot give our sister hope to hold on to life. Please.” He startled when Nachalya took his hand.
“Father always taught me that family is important. I watched him grieve many times when his Githalin lost hers. I would not wish his pain on anyone else. Come.” She raised her eyes to his briefly, then lowered them again. “He rests inside.”
Seeker exhaled, his tension easing as Anibu’s presence subsided. “On behalf of my Totani and myself, thank you.” She nodded and led him inside.
Terrence put a hand on Nolyn’s shoulder. “You have more experience with handling Trisari. Go talk with Thesrial. Please.”
“Me? Just because of Endarian…?” Nolyn frowned at the other, studying him intently. “Something is wrong. What is it?”
The younger man exhaled, closing his eyes. “Since the meeting with the other Githalin, Dzee has not spoken to or through me. She has withdrawn so much, I cannot find her at all.”
Nolyn’s expression darkened with concern. “Your bond to Dzee is not impaired, too, is it?”
“No. Well, not like it is with Storm and Thandar. It’s…” He sighed, shoulders sagging slightly. “I was upset when I left the meeting. It felt like everyone dumped their expectations on me. The ancient trinity asked me to help Them find redemption, Bastille gave me the anchor stone to take to Nachalya, but I neither knew what it was or anything about her. Just I was to take it where it was supposed to go without even the first clue where to begin.
“The ancient trinity demanded the tribe find someone to take Zhekali’s place if we wanted her to remain among us. And while it is not my task alone, I am na’Zhekali and…” He turned away, his fists clenched. “I know Storm feels deep shame because she tried to destroy her own spirit to protect us from possible threat from Them. Suicide by one’s own hand is a grave stain on the soul. On top of all that, she’s suffering with her Githalin bond fractured. I won’t even begin with the prophesy about freeing the A’tyrna Ulan.”
“And the Totani said they expected you to be the one to find Thandar. Well. That is a lot, yes. Rather overwhelming when you think you have to plan before acting. Know the road before the journey begins, so to speak. Rather the opposite of Mureln and his gypsy brothers who just let things happen without planning, trusting whatever must be, will be.”
Nolyn exhaled and put a hand on the other’s back. “The thing is, you have found Thandar. And I’m certain between you and Ash, you’ll figure out a means to free the A’tyrna Ulan from their self-imprisonment.” He glanced toward the cave entrance. “And if I’m not mistaken, Nachalya is likely your best bet for someone to take Zhekali’s place.”
Terrence startled. “Nachalya?”
“Of course.” A sardonic grin touched his lips as he held up both hands, palms up. “Zhekali was a mortal who comprehended herself and the world so well, she could choose to change what she was. Quite literally. That required an understanding and a sense of the balance that keeps everything from falling apart.
“But she was not completely balanced. She favored the chaotic emotional energies despite understanding and respecting the more orderly knowledge aspect. Essentially, she shouldered the task of being the conscience of the ancient trinity and anyone else. That is why Avarian became so important to her. He balanced her chaotic nature by being more orderly, but respecting the more chaotic emotional aspect.”
Terrence frowned. “Do you think that is why it requires both of them to open a portal? Not so much that it’s a task supposedly only divine servants can perform, but because they each possess half the qualities needed?”
“It seems to be a reasonable conclusion. But that’s something to investigate once all these crises are dealt with.” He smiled faintly. “Even though we’ve found Thandar, we have to figure out how to get him home, to Desantiva or the Rumblelands, so we’re not going anywhere anytime soon. Go and mend things with Dzee.” He sighed as he turned to the cavern entrance. “I’ll see what I can do with Thesrial.”
Terrence’s expression became sorrowful. “Nolyn, I’m sorry I’m foisting—”
“You are doing no such thing,” he interrupted, his voice stern. “Remind me to tell about the path to redemption for the Trisari. Their abject belief they are undeserving, and how they would rather suffer kept apart from our great mother than show themselves as flawed and fallible.” He headed inside. “It becomes obnoxious after a while.”
The younger man tilted his head, watching him go. “Redemption again.” He shook his head and went out onto the ledge to think.
DESPITE THE EXTERIOR’S natural appearance, the interior of the caverns reflected the will of magic having been wielded upon them. Sconces with balls of magelight shed a bright glow on every corner. Delicate imagery with impossibly fine, soft detail covered the walls. Even the floor had designs within it.
The moment Seeker heard raspy breathing, he pulled his hand from Nachalya’s and ran into the chamber. The golden eagle lay on a stone bed, his wings limply unfurled and eyes shut. The man stood unmoving, stunned and feeling his Totani’s shock at the sight of the noble Totani.
“Thandar!” He knelt by the pallet, holding a shaking hand over the eagle’s back before touching him. “Thandar?”
The Totani twitched at the touch and roused. “Anibu? No.” One eye opened, then rolled shut again. “Seeker? How…are you…here?” he rasped. When he shifted, it became immediately obvious to the Githalin that Thandar suffered from injuries.
“Stop,” Seeker murmured, stroking the bird’s head. “You do not need to cause yourself more pain.” When Thandar ceased struggling, he continued, keeping his voice to a soothing murmur. “I am here because of Terrence and Nachalya.”
The Totani tensed. “Nachalya?” Thandar opened both eyes, staring at the woman with surprise and mild disapproval. “You were to remain hidden. You know why!”
“Yes, Father.” She did not look at the two, turning away. “You and your companions will need sustenance, Githalin Swordanzen. I shall go prepare it.”
Seeker watched her leave before he gave his attention back to the eagle Totani. “Why didn’t you return to the Rumblelands? You must be aware Storm suffers as much as you because of the disruption of your bond.”
“I know she does, but I thought…I thought she would choose to break it to become Zhekali again.” His voice turned to a bare whisper. “Ties like ours are forbidden between divine servants. Since it was already fractured…the Changing One suggested…I refrain from seeking her out to mend it.” His eyes closed again. “Now I cannot.”
The man swore under his breath. “I thought only the Unchanging One had interfered. He went after you? I do not want to be near when she unleashes her wrath on Them. Again.”
Thandar looked at him. “’Again?’”
Seeker shook his head, giving the avian Totani his attention again. “Did you really think she would become a divine servant again because her bond to you fractured?” He frowned, but his touch remained gentle and soothing. “Of all of your brothers and sisters, you know Storm better than anyone. Did you truly believe she would abandon her lifemate? Her mortal family? After everything she has endured?”
Thandar closed his eyes. “After everything I had done, how could I expect her to want to remain bound to me? I deserve none of her forgiveness.”
Seeker tilted his head in Anibu’s and his own bewilderment. “What could you have done that she would not want to be your Githalin anymore? Anibu knows nothing that would warrant such a thing. Especially not by her. You have been her soul’s companion since the beginning of her curse.”
Thandar sighed. “I found her nearly every rebirth. Know everything she knew from every life. Especially her immortal life. I knew…I knew how to break her curse. Yet I did nothing. I did not try to convince our lord father to make an exception for her to leave Desantiva. I did not disobey Him to try and find Avarian myself.”
Hi
s form shuddered and melted into his humanoid form, uttering an agonized cry as his form shifted. Bruises covered him, the missing feathers from his wings more obvious. “Her suffering existed because of me. For more than two thousand years, I let her suffer with her soul torn apart because of what Avarian had been. Because he was one of the Knowing One’s children. Endarian’s abominable get.”
Seeker looked upward, listening to Anibu in his head. With a grim expression, he sat beside Thandar. “I would call Kailee here so she could speak to you directly, but she needs to reserve her energy in case Skyfire needs her.” He did not look at the golden-eyed Totani, feeling his gaze on him. “But you must know what she saw through her Githalin. Why you must fight to live and return to her.”
He narrowed his eyes. “What are you talking about?”
The man took a deep breath, girding himself before speaking. “Storm tried to destroy her soul when she confronted the ancient trinity for Their betrayal of Their word to her that she could choose her path.” When Thandar said nothing for so long, he finally looked at him.
The Totani’s expression remained blank for several more minutes. “…Why? Why would she do such a thing?”
“To protect you. Her lifemate. Her family. The Unchanging One sent Kendle to try to coerce her into abandoning her tribe. To say she was enraged diminishes her reaction. When she confronted Them, she did what she felt would protect both of her families from Their continuing threat.” Seeker could not meet Thandar’s eyes as what happened sank in. “Skyfire knew what she had done. He could see because of Citali’s gift, feel because of the bayuli-volsha. He held her as she faded. The Timeless One healed her, but—”
“But? What else?” Thandar asked, his voice flat.
Seeker pressed his lips together, his reluctance to tell him obvious. “Storm was pregnant. With two children. Twins, the northborn call them. She could not recover properly because of the physical demands of the pregnancy and the strain of the flawed Githalin bond.