He’s big, just as I thought. Being face to dick makes me realize that real quick. Taking a deep breath, I grasp the base of him and start licking the sides, and he practically bends in half toward me.
“What are you doing?” he chokes out.
“Really, Ash? What do you think I’m doing?” I lick him like a popsicle, trailing my tongue up one side and down the other.
“You—don’t—have—to.” Every time my tongue meets his sensitive skin, he pauses, and I sort of want to laugh, but I don’t.
“I want to,” I whisper just before I slip the head of his erection between my lips. He tastes like tangy salt too, and I test his width, nerves making me hesitant.
“If you think you’re doing it wrong, trust me. You’re not,” he says, panting. Like he’s a mind reader.
His words give me the confidence I need to keep going. I suck and lick, drawing him deeper into my mouth, until I can’t take him any farther. I don’t really know what I’m doing, so I just copy from the few porn clips I’ve seen on the internet, using my tongue and lips and hand, squeezing him extra tight like he taught me to last night. It must work, because he’s a writhing, groaning mess within minutes, and he even gives me a warning.
“I’m gonna come,” he says, his eyes pitch black and filled with desperation.
“Good.” I slip my mouth over just the head again and suck extra hard, wanting him to come in my mouth. Just so I can see what it’s like.
It’s a blast of salty liquid is what it’s like, hitting me right in the back of the throat within seconds of that warning. His entire body jerks and shivers, and I pull away from him, my hand still curled around the base as I give him a couple more strokes, swallowing his come with a slight grimace.
Of course Ash notices my face once it’s all over. And he starts laughing, the jerk. “Didn’t like it?”
I release my hold on him and wipe my sticky hand on my discarded tank top. “It wasn’t my favorite.”
He starts laughing even harder and I crawl up the length of his body, resting my hand across his mouth. “You’re going to wake everyone up,” I warn him.
When he calms down and I move my hand away from his mouth, he says, “No one is as loud as you, Callahan. All that moaning when I licked your pussy.”
I clamp my hand over his mouth again. “You can’t say that.”
“Say what?” he asks, his voice muffled.
“You know.” He can’t get me to say it.
He licks my hand and I drop it away from his mouth. “Lick your pussy? You don’t like it when I say that?”
I shake my head, laughing when he rolls to his side and pulls me with him. “No, it’s gross.”
“Gross? So you’re saying your pussy is gross? I don’t think so. Maybe you want me to stop licking and touching it then.” His hand starts to wander. Across my stomach. Down lower. Until his fingers are between my legs. “Huh. It’s all wet and pink and glistening…”
“Stop.” His hand stills and I give him a look. “Well, you don’t have to stop that.”
“You can’t have your cake and eat it too, sweetheart.” He kisses me once, whispering, “I like talking about your pussy. It’s my new favorite thing.”
I slip my hand between our faces and settle it over his mouth. “I don’t know if I want to hear you talk about it all the time.”
“Too bad. You’re gonna.” He wraps his lips around my finger and bites it, but not too hard. Just enough to sting. At the exact moment his teeth sink into my flesh, he starts to stroke, softly. Lightly. Making me tingle. Making me wetter.
He releases my finger from his teeth. “See? Damn, that pussy of yours is amazing. Look at how I barely touch it and you get so wet for me.”
“Ash…” My voice drifts and I close my eyes when he starts playing with my clit.
“Yeah, baby? What do you want? You want me to make you come again?”
I never, ever thought I’d be so responsive to someone who talks to me while we’re having sex. I figured it would make me uncomfortable. But for some reason, Ash’s deep voice saying dirty things is only making me more aroused.
“Yes please,” I whisper and he cracks a smile, kissing me while he increases the pressure of his fingers.
“I could lick this pussy all night long,” he practically croons, and a full-body shiver washes over me at his words, the tone of his voice. “You want me to keep touching it?”
I nod, biting my lip.
“So pretty.” I can actually hear his fingers as he strokes me, I’m so wet. “So juicy. Can’t wait to fuck it.”
Oh, that’s it. Yep, I’m coming, all because he said he wants to fuck my pussy.
Clearly, I’m a total pervert.
And I love it.
Twenty-Six
It was weird not seeing Ash out on the field Friday night during the game. No mention of his name, no one calling out his jersey number. Despite my missing him, I gave it my all, cheering on my brother, who I have to admit played the best game of his life. We won, and afterward a local news photographer took a photo of our entire family, and I realized that was probably the only time I will cheer on the sidelines for Jake while he plays for the varsity team. When he moves up next year, I’ll be gone.
Unless for some reason Ash won’t be able to play anymore and Jake ends up taking his place for the rest of the season.
I can barely stand the thought.
When I arrived at the house after the game, I noticed Dad’s car was already in the garage. How did he and Jake beat me home? Usually they stay long after the game’s finished, talking with everyone, but they must’ve left when I was still in the cheer room. I had plans on seeing Ash, possibly sneaking into his room once everyone was asleep, but all three of them were in my dad’s office with the door closed. Probably talking about football and going over the game.
I felt so completely left out, I stomped upstairs like a baby and took a long, hot shower. I shaved my legs, I shaved between my legs and afterward, I lotioned up my entire body in anticipation of Ash and me getting together later.
And then promptly fell asleep, only to wake up the next morning past eight o’clock.
It’s the scent of bacon that lures me awake. I throw a sweatshirt on and head down the stairs, finger-combing my hair so I don’t look like a total nightmare when I enter the kitchen. I’m guessing Ash will be there, waiting for me with one of those wicked smiles curving his perfect lips.
I guess wrong. He’s nowhere to be found, and neither is Dad. It’s Mom who’s making breakfast, this time bacon and French toast. My absolute favorite, though we rarely have it because both Dad and Jake don’t really like it.
That’s when I notice they’re not in the kitchen either.
“Good morning!” Mom says cheerily, her long blonde hair pulled into a perfect messy bun. She makes things look so effortless sometimes, I find it almost annoying. But in a good way. In a I have lots of aspirations to be just like my mom way.
“Hey,” I say. Ava and Beck are sitting at the counter, both of them quiet because they’re too busy shoveling food into their mouths. “Where’s Dad and Jake?”
“They left about an hour ago with Ash.” I wait to see if she’ll say anything else, but that’s all she gives me. “I’m assuming you want breakfast.”
“Sure.” Frustrated, I go to the coffeemaker and pour myself a cup, then dump in a bunch of creamer before I take my mug over to the counter. On weekends Mom makes a giant pot of coffee versus us using the Keurig or stopping at Starbucks, which is what I usually do before school starts.
Mom flips the piece of French toast that’s in the pan, slowly cooking it to that perfect golden brown. “You’re grumpy.”
You know what a grumpy person hates? When someone calls them out for being grumpy. “I’m fine.”
“Uh huh.” Mom piles a couple of pieces of French toast onto a plate, adds a few slices of bacon and deposits the plate directly in front of me, then pushes the maple syrup my way. “Any o
f this have to do with Ash not being around this morning?”
I pause, the bacon hovering in front of my parted lips. She’s got her back to me once more as she prepares a couple more pieces of French toast, I’m assuming for herself. My brain scrambles, trying to come up with an answer.
“I guess his mother reached out to him last night, wanting to meet with him this morning, and so he asked your dad and your brother to go with him,” Mom explains, her back still to me as she stands in front of the stove.
I drop the bacon on my plate, my appetite leaving me just like that. “What do you mean, he’s meeting with his mother?”
“I mean exactly what I say.” Mom places two pieces of French toast on her plate, switches off the stove burner, and then turns to face me. “They’re meeting for breakfast at Pop’s.”
“All four of them?” I can only imagine Jake sitting there watching it unfold, bored out of his mind. Dad I can definitely see wanting to help, maybe even acting as a mediator, but my brother? That’s a big ol’ nope.
“Your father and brother planned on sitting at another table nearby. They discussed it beforehand and decided Ash wouldn’t mention to his mother that they were there, just so he had backup. He was supposed to meet with her alone, but that made him nervous. He thought she might bring Don, so your dad and Jake offered to go,” Mom says, sounding perfectly logical.
But what she just said sounds perfectly terrible. I can’t believe Ash agreed to meet with his mom. Worse, I can’t believe he didn’t tell me. I’m sort of hurt. Not even a text to let me know where he’s at? I’m not his keeper or anything, but after everything we’ve shared this week, I at least deserve a message, right?
Or maybe I’m just being unreasonable.
“Jake went for a free breakfast,” I mumble as I start munching on my bacon. It turns out I’m starving, and this is the most delicious bacon I’ve had in a long time. And Mom’s French toast is to die for.
“I’m sure he did. He loves Pop’s.” They’re a local place known for their homecooked breakfasts, which everyone loves, both locals and tourists. “But don’t complain. You’re getting your favorite breakfast since they’re not here.” She smiles at me as she settles onto the stool next to mine, and I can’t help but smile in return.
We talk about last night’s game. Ava admits she wishes she tried out for cheer and I gave her a told you so look, but keep my mouth shut. It’s Mom who hits her with the I told you so.
“I’m gonna play football like Jakey and Daddy,” Beck announces, pounding the quartz counter with his fist. If Jake heard Beck call him Jakey he’d probably threaten bodily harm.
“You already do,” Ava points out, but Beck shakes his head.
“Not peewee stuff. I wanna play high school. And college. Then one day, the pros!” he yells.
“I’m sure you will,” Mom says in agreement as we all start cleaning up the kitchen, even Beck, who’s tossing all the napkins in the trash. “You’re a tank on the field.”
Beck will never be a quarterback like Dad and Jake. When he gets on the field, he just wants to mow down everyone in his path. He’s the perfect lineman.
I’m a ball of nervous energy as I help Mom wash the pans. I wish Ash were back already. I don’t like thinking of him alone with his mother, even though I know Dad and Jake are both there. Nothing bad will happen, but what if she did something terrible like…call the police?
What if they come to the restaurant and arrest him? What if they haul him off to jail? It’s Saturday, so he’d probably have to stay there the entire weekend. He’s so young. He’s only seventeen, but I bet they wouldn’t put him in juvenile hall. Nope, they’d put him in actual jail with the real criminals and he’d probably freak out and—
“Autumn, are you all right?” Mom rests a hand on my back, and I realize I’m just staring at the soapy water in the sink, my hands gripping the edge, not doing really anything.
“I’m fine.” I reach deeper into the sink and undo the plug, watching as the water slowly drains out. “Just still a little tired, I guess.”
Mom rubs my back soothingly, and I lean into her a little bit, needing the reassurance. I appreciate that she’s not making a big deal over what she said earlier, about me being grumpy because Ash isn’t around. I figured she’d start questioning me, but she hasn’t really said much of anything. “You don’t think she’ll pull something on him, do you? Like call the cops?”
“Who? Ash’s mother? She’s a terrible human, but I don’t think she’s that terrible,” Mom says. “Plus, I’m sure she has her own secrets to hide.”
Curiosity fills me. “What do you mean by that?”
“That’s not my story to tell.”
Ooh, I hate it when she says stuff like that.
“I’ve noticed you two have gotten closer,” Mom continues.
Uh oh, I thought too soon. Here come the comments and questions.
My cheeks grow warm and I hate how I blush so easily. I give all my feelings away, I swear. “We—have.”
Mom slips her arm around my shoulders and gives me a squeeze. “I’m surprised it took you two this long.”
“Why would you say that?” I duck away from her arm and grab a damp rag, then start wiping the counter.
“You two were awfully cozy during homecoming week your sophomore year. I thought for sure something would happen then, but it didn’t.” Mom smiles. “And by the way, Ava already cleaned the kitchen counters.”
“Oh.” I toss the rag back into the sink and cross my arms, feeling dumb. I also feel like I’m about to burst with my feelings for Ash. I can’t tell her everything since I don’t want to freak her out with all the sex stuff, but I can share a few things. “I really like him.”
“I think he really likes you too.” She tilts her head, studying me. “I just hope he treats you with respect.”
“He does,” I tell her, standing up straighter. “He’s a little rough around the edges, but that doesn’t bother me.”
“I’m the one who used to be a little rough around the edges,” Mom says with a faint smile. “He reminds me of myself when I was that age. With the terrible parents and the bleak outlook on life. The devil-may-care attitude and the self-destructive behavior. He could graduate, get out of here and do something with his life if he continues to focus and made the right choices.”
He so could. Not that I want him to leave me, but I plan on leaving this town too. Maybe we could go somewhere together. A college not too far away, but just far enough, where he could play football and I could watch him and we could eventually move in together…
Whoops. I’m moving way too fast.
“Just—Autumn.” I turn to look at her, noting the serious tone of her voice, her equally serious expression. “Be careful with Ash. I know you’re a smart girl and you’ve always made good choices, but…I know how young love is. Don’t do anything reckless.”
Too late, I want to tell her, but I don’t. Instead, I smile and go to her, wrapping her up in a big hug. “I’m always careful, Mom,” I say, but deep down, I know that’s a lie.
When it comes to Ash, I am reckless. And if I don’t watch it…
I might get burned.
I’m in my room sorting my laundry, my least favorite chore in the entire world, when I finally hear my dad, Jake and Ash enter the house through the kitchen. I practically run out of my room and sprint down the stairs, slowing down as I approach the living room where all three of them are, along with Mom.
“…so it went all right?” Mom asks.
“As well as can be expected,” Ash answers, annoyance bleeding into his voice. “She wants me to come home. She wanted to take me back with her from the restaurant, but I told her I had to think about it first.”
“Oh dear.” Mom sounds like a total…mom right now. “Do you want to go home?”
I stand just on the other side of the wall, waiting for his answer.
“I don’t know. If I go back there, it’ll be the same old shit, y
ou know? Sorry, I don’t mean to keep cursing,” Ash says. “But I know she won’t change. Once we lost my dad, it’s like I lost her too.”
His words make me so sad. He may have his mother physically, but she’s not really there for him. I can’t imagine dealing with something like that.
“Stop apologizing. We all curse in this house. Sometimes even Beck,” Mom says wryly, which is the truth. When Beck was younger, he was a total parrot, mimicking all of us, usually only the bad words. “If you don’t want to go back and live with your mom yet, you don’t have to.”
“I told him the same thing,” Dad chimes in.
“I’m going up to my room,” Jake says, sounding totally bored. He exits the living room, stopping short when he notices me lurking, and sends me a quizzical look. “What are you doing?”
“Sshh.” I rest my finger over my lip, but too late. Everyone heard Jake call me out.
Ash leans around the edge of the doorway to see both Jake and me standing there. “Callahan, whatcha doing? Why you lurking around out here like a stalker?”
The amusement in his voice, the smile on his face and the sparkle in his gaze fills me with infinite relief. It seems like forever since I saw him last, even if it’s only been around twenty-four hours, and I wish I could run up to him and grab him like I want to.
But I don’t. Instead I smile at him in return and duck my head, a little embarrassed I got caught spying. “I thought you might want to talk to my parents alone. I didn’t want to interrupt.”
“I think we’re done.” He leaves the living room without saying another word to either of my parents and comes toward me. His dark gaze is all for me, and I tilt my head back as he draws even closer. Probably too close, especially if Dad’s watching. “Let’s go outside and talk,” Ash says, his voice low. Intimate. “I’ll tell you everything that happened.”
I send him a look, trying to communicate with my eyes that maybe that’s not a good idea, but he’s not getting it. Of course he’s not. He’s too focused on me, and while I appreciate that, we have to watch what we’re doing. I don’t want to make my mom worry, or my dad suspicious.
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