It was great having Char in the ward with me. Although she had her own patients to tend to, we’d caught five minutes in between casualties to catch a breather and chat.
My feet ached and fatigue gripped me, all before three o’clock in the afternoon. My sleep had dwindled to just a few hours a night at best since Harley had gone. I still thought of him, wondering how he coped. I couldn’t help it. The nurse in me would never leave. Plus, I still cared about him. Really cared. I missed him a lot and wished he would make contact. I hadn’t called Viper to ask, giving Harley the space he requested.
Nick, my ex-boyfriend, hadn’t made contact either, which didn’t bother me. I knew it was over long before he packed up all his belongings.
Still, with no male presence around, it had been lonely. Char had done her best to help me move on, taking me out and attempting to hook me up with male nurses or doctors, but I turned her down each time. The only man I kept picturing had endless dark brown eyes that captured me every time. A tipped up mouth soft enough to eat, and molded arms strong enough to hold me through the night.
“Earth to Mac. You zoning out again?”
“Just thinking.”
“About Harley?”
“I…uh…” She could read me well enough to tell if I lied, so I opted for the truth. “Is it that obvious?”
“Girl, you’ve been off your game for weeks. I see that faraway look you get in your eyes when you think no one’s watching. It’s not a, ‘I have been to hell and back’ look either, it’s more of a ‘I miss him so damn much’ kind of expression.”
Laughing at her precise observation, I checked my watch, knowing I needed to get back to work. “Yeah ,well, it’s obvious he’s got no intention of making contact, so I need to forget about him and get on with things. I’ve been trying. It’s just hard, you know?”
“Yeah, I do. You really liked the guy. Give yourself more time. I’m sure in another month or so you’ll be asking, “Harley who?”
Hmmm. I couldn’t be so sure, but I did need to focus on my work for a change. It wasn’t healthy to obsess over something I couldn’t have.
Placing one foot in front of the other, I left the break room and headed back to the nurses’ station. When I rounded the corner, and saw who stood at the desk, all breath left me. My legs weakened and I had to place a hand on the wall to steady myself.
Leaning with his back to the reception area, with his arms folded, wearing a leather jacket and dark blue jeans with his black work boots, he looked every bit as good as my memory served.
Better even. His hair had grown slightly longer, his face clean-shaven. Even in profile, he oozed authority and presence.
I stood and gaped, letting myself take him all in, wondering why he had come.
Did I quietly walk away or did I go to him and ask what he wanted?
I didn’t have to wait to decide. He made the decision for me, turning and zeroing in on me with all the intensity of a starved man during a famine.
My body wouldn’t move. I should have walked away. The rational part of me screamed to go back the way I had come but with his utmost focus on only me, I just couldn’t do it.
People moved all around us but they were nothing more than abstract shapes as I took in all his gloriousness. He appeared less angry and more in control. Calmer.
I stood still to see what he’d do, not wanting to go to him, but not wanting to move. His lips lifted slightly as he took the first step. He hadn’t looked away and neither had I. I didn’t want to miss a thing. The last three weeks had been torture. I thought I’d never see him again. Especially not in my place of work. Speaking of which, how did he get into the Emergency Ward?
As he neared, my breathing changed, almost coming to a complete stop. His essence reached out to touch me, wrapping its tentacles around me. His scent came next, coating my nostrils, sparking a hormonal reaction. My body sold out my rationality. Traitor.
He filled the space in front of me until my eyes leveled with his neck. He swallowed hard, the tight muscles bulging with the effort, as if he too struggled to remain composed.
“Angel.”
His name for me. He hadn’t called me Mac. Did that mean…? No. It didn’t mean a thing. Old habit.
“What are you doing here?” I attempted to keep the hope out of my voice as I finally looked up and into his absorbing stare.
“Waiting for you to finish.”
“What? Why? I don’t finish for another two and a half hours.”
“I’ll wait.”
“But you can’t just hang around in here. As you can see…” I swept my hand around us. “We’re busy. Speaking of which, I need to get back to work.”
Knowing I still had rounds to do, I moved to shuffle past him, unable to soak in his beauty any longer. I sucked in a sharp breath when his large hand seized my arm. Not hard, but with enough pressure to let me know he needed to tell me something.
“Wait. Please. We need to talk.”
Not sure what he wanted, I didn’t want to make things easy for him. He’d pushed me away when I needed him and now he just waltzed in here expecting me to concede to his request.
“How did you get in here, anyway?”
Looking away for a second, he focused again. “I have my ways.”
“Of course you do. You have military clearance, right?” It came out a little snarkier than I intended.
“Look. I’ll stay here all Goddamn night if I need to, but I’m not leaving until we’ve talked.”
Hearing my name paged, I had no choice but to agree. I didn’t have time to stand and tell him all the reasons why talking would be a bad idea.
“Fine. Stay out of the way and don’t interrupt me again while I’m working.” I didn’t wait for an answer. I took off to the room I’d been called to, happy for some breathing space, yet nervous about being alone with him. Had he come to tell me he was shutting me out completely? That he’d decided to work things out with Trudy after all?
Gah! Now my brain ran at the speed of sound, overthinking everything. Damn him showing up. I had been on the cusp of accepting his decision to shut me out and move on. Now, after seeing him again, I clung to the slight possibility that maybe, just maybe he’d want to work things out. It didn’t bode well for the rest of my shift.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Harley
I knew she’d arrived before I turned and saw her stunning face. My body came alive and all my senses were on high alert. I gave her a moment before I focused everything I had on her. I’d be the last person she expected to see at her work. Especially in the area reserved for emergencies only. I was hardly that, although the favor I’d called in from her friend Charlotte had paid off handsomely. At first she’d given me an earful about what an asshole I’d been, but after explaining why I needed to see Mac and what my intentions were, she’d conceded, albeit, begrudgingly.
So here I stood, the slow pivot of my legs bringing me in line with my lifeline. My breathing apparatus. The gorgeous woman who’d unwittingly burrowed into the thick walls of my heart and found me when I’d been lost. The weeks that had passed and the medication helping me settle, had brought about a new clarity. Life sucked without Mac in it. She shined light in the darkness. I wanted what she had to offer. I never should have pushed her away, but I didn’t know any other way. I still didn’t know if I’d hurt her, but with each day, my resolve strengthened. I needed to fight for the good. What had transpired in my past needed to stay there and not own me. It would be a new kind of battle I’d be fighting for years to come but for Mac, I’d try. I owed her that. If she still wanted me. I couldn’t blame her if she hated me and didn’t want anything to do with me.
Her gaze, when I found it, told me all I needed to know. Mixed with the initial shock of my appearance, like some ghost from the dark, I saw a flicker of hope. That little spark was all I needed. My feet moved before my brain could catch up. Her pull led me.
Christ, she epitomized the perfect woman in her s
crubs, and I wanted nothing more than to push her up against the wall and take that mouth. Oh, how I’d missed that mouth. It tried to smile but didn’t quite get there, and I knew I shouldn’t expect her quick forgiveness, but damn, if I didn’t want to see the way it upturned and dimpled when she showed me her pearly whites.
Mixed amongst the sliver of hope I could see anger. Perfectly justified. Surprised she hadn’t shunned me completely, I noted the way she shone under the fluorescent lights as if otherworldly.
“Angel.” My angel. I needed her alone to plead my case but I knew it wouldn’t happen at her place of employment.
Asking what I was doing here, I explained I was waiting for her to finish.
She appeared to put her shutters back up again, straightening her spine. When she agreed to talk after her shift, my shoulders and anxiety eased somewhat. I’d hang out in a hard chair if I had to, but I wasn’t leaving without her.
Watching her walk off after she’d been paged, I followed the sway of her hips, hoping like hell I’d get to feel them beneath me again. I had some serious groveling to do, something which I had never needed to do before. If that’s what it took, I’d do it. I’d kiss the ground she walked on.
When she’d asked me how I’d come to be in the Emergency section, I’d dodged giving her a proper answer. I wouldn’t sell her friend out. I’d promised.
With chaos unfolding around me, I slid into my own head, filling my time with images and thoughts of Mac. From the moment I’d found consciousness after the shooting, it had been her. Only her. And I’d all but blown it with my own selfishness.
To think of all she’d been through since knowing me. The demise of her relationship with Nick, which in all fairness had already begun to crumble before I appeared on the scene but still, maybe they could have worked it out.
Her apartment being ransacked. The abduction and beatings, feeling like she would die in that dank, warehouse. And to top it all off, I’d been a total ass and set her aside as if she were nothing more than a passing thought.
Through it all, she’d survived. The way her demeanor had shifted into that of a battle-hardened woman had raised my respect for her even more. She had returned to work to continue her destiny of helping others, even when she’d needed help herself. That’s the type of woman I wanted. One who would carry me to my own salvation.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mac
“Hello? Nurse? I asked for an update on Brock Henderson in room five. Have we got his bloods back from the lab yet?”
Snapping out of a head full of Harley, I answered swiftly, “Sorry, doctor. I’ll get on it.”
Scurrying down the hallway toward room five, where seven-year-old Brock had been brought in with a high fever and rash, I mentally berated myself for letting my work suffer.
I’d been standing with the boy’s file in my hand at reception when Dr. Bennett had caught me. Feeling like an idiot, I pushed the curtain aside to assess Brock, his worried parents hovering.
“Any news yet, Nurse?”
“I’m sorry. I’m going to check the computer now to see if they’ve sent the results. Shouldn’t take too long.” Unless I lost my mind to one hot, thick-headed soldier again. Not happening while I was on the clock.
Each holding bay had a computer for easy access to information. I checked to see if the bloods were back, glad to see they’d been sent through.
Scanning the screen, I couldn’t find any obvious signs of the youngster’s illness. Full blood count—normal. Kidney and liver function—normal. Nothing stood out in red. A good sign but frustrating for the parents, who wanted answers.
“Everything appears fine. I’m sure it’s just a virus. We’ll keep him here a little longer until his fever comes down. Kids often get a rash with a viral infection so we need to make sure he gets plenty of fluids and rest to help fight it.” I smiled. I’d pressed down on the rash earlier, making sure it paled upon depression, which it had, or I may have ordered more tests to discount meningitis. I’d witnessed rashes associated with meningitis and this one differed. It was blotchy and only appeared on his front torso. More like a heat rash. The boy appeared coherent. I wasn’t ready to put him through the trauma of a spinal tap.
Both parents appeared pleased with the results, nodding at my diagnosis.
Leaving them with the promise of my return shortly, I redrew the curtain, almost bumping into Char, who hurried down the central aisle.
“Wow, girl. Slow down.” I steadied us both as we collided.
“Hey! Sorry. Got a head trauma victim just brought in. You free?”
Checking my watch, I nodded. “I’ve got a few minutes spare.”
We both headed to the ambulance entrance. I was grateful to be distracted enough to let Harley out of my thoughts for a while.
***
When my shift ended, I clocked out and wandered around my ward, wondering if Harley had ended up waiting or got tired and left.
I did a quick walk around, finding him in a waiting area off to the side of the hallway leading to the short stay ward. He stood as soon as he saw me. I’d changed out of my scrubs into a pair of jeans and a long sleeved blue shirt with my Converse sneakers.
He looked me over slowly, eliciting a series of shockwaves in his aftermath, but I tried not to show it.
“You ready?” he asked in a dry voice.
“Yep. I’ll follow you.”
Shaking his head, he moved in closer. “I’ll bring you back to pick up your car. I want to take you for a ride.”
“Oh. Okay. Let’s go then.”
Not sure where he wanted to take me, I walked alongside him, trying not to sneak peeks every few seconds. His presence disarmed me. I felt him all the way to my toes, and I wasn’t sure how I would get through the next couple of hours.
We left through the main entrance, moving across the parking lot. The sun still shone at 6 p.m., a gentle breeze wafting over us. We hadn’t uttered a word, and I found it a little disconcerting, considering we’d never had an issue with conversation before.
After a couple of minutes, Harley stopped before a 1969 Chev Camaro. I didn’t consider myself a car buff, but I liked a classic. My Mustang proved that. For a moment, I ogled the fine machine, appreciating the gleaming blue paintwork and sleek lines.
Whistling, I crooned, “Oh my God. She’s gorgeous!” Looking up to Harley with a bright smile, I almost skipped closer. “She yours?”
“Yup. She is now. My mother gave her to me today. Ah…she belonged to my dad.”
Knowing his father had passed, I stopped short of the passenger side door, looking over to him. He wore a wistful expression so I kept the mood light, not wanting to bring about any pain.
“Wow! She’s in fine condition. Not a scratch on her. You sure you should be driving her?”
“I’m keeping her at Mom’s, but I wanted to take her for a spin.”
“You’ve seen your mom?” It wasn’t so much a question as a statement.
“Yeah. I went around today.” He looked away as he spoke.
“How did she react to everything that’s happened?” I imagined she would be shocked and hurt over Harley’s shooting and his temporary amnesia.
“Ahh, I didn’t tell her.”
I spun further to face him. “You didn’t tell your mother you were shot?”
He looked at me then, his darkened eyes filled with indecision. “I didn’t want to worry her.” His voice had softened. I could see how much he loved his mom.
“Still, she deserves to know.”
He stared into me, nodding minutely, his mouth set.
Eager to get in and see how she rode, I waited for Harley to insert the key to unlock her. No automatic locking on this baby.
When he brushed against me, a light tremor had me shivering. I should be getting into my own car and going home, not taking a drive in a confined space with a man who had recently tried to break me and now still had the power to turn me into a puddle of desire.
Waiting on him to move, I quickly climbed in and closed the door, breathing in the ‘olden day’ smell. Everything inside had been restored, from the upholstery to the steering wheel and dashboard. I was impressed.
Harley moved to the driver’s side and got in and absorbed even more of the space we needed between us. His leather jacket crinkled as he got comfortable and inserted the key into the ignition. I appreciated the low rumble as the engine fired up, excitement bubbling over.
His face lit with as much amusement as mine, our shared love of cars momentarily bridging the gap that had threatened to tear us apart.
Turning his head to mine, he smiled. “Hang on, angel.”
Easing out of the parking lot and onto the street, he hit the gas, propelling us forward. I gripped the seatbelt, enjoying the power the car yielded.
She was a smooth ride and her engine ticked over without missing a beat. There had been a lot of love poured into her, I could tell. Glancing at Harley, I noticed the half-smile on his face as he maneuvered her in and out of traffic.
Unaware of where we were headed, it wasn’t until we turned into the familiar apartment complex that I realized he’d driven to his place.
My nerves ratcheted up a notch at being in his space. It seemed an incredibly personal place to be having ‘the talk,’ but there wasn’t much I could do about it. We were here now. I’d need to suck it up and deal.
He pulled into a visitor park at the end of his row of apartments. Having only one garage space, I knew his truck would be locked up inside.
Before I could get out, Harley was around to my side, opening the door for me. Chivalry wasn’t dead after all. Either that or he was pulling out all the stops.
We still hadn’t spoken much, if at all, and I felt a little lost.
Following him into the apartment, I let him lead me into the small living room.
“You want a coffee? Wine? Beer?” He removed his jacket and threw it over the arm of the sofa, gifting me the view of his sculpted arms. Hell, I loved a nice set of arms.
The Lost and Found Series Page 33