Chapter 6
Exhaustion thrummed through my body as I showered later that night. These guys didn’t mess around when it came to PT, and every muscle in my body ached. A part of me wanted to call it a night, but I wasn’t ready to be alone in the dark just yet. I dressed in my tightest jeans, dug out a crop top that showed off my toned abs, and threw on a leather jacket. My hair was still damp from the shower, but I decided to leave it to dry in waves.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, knowing I had put this off for far too long. I stared at my phone for almost a minute more before I got up the courage to press the call button. It rang twice, and then a curt voice answered.
“Hello, Mrs. Hart?” I asked cautiously.
“Yes?” she said abruptly, clearly impatient to get the phone call over.
“My name is Samantha Clive,” I explained. “I served with your daughter while-” “I know who you are,” she said coldly.
I cleared my throat. “I was calling to offer my condolences.” “Is that all?” she snapped.
“And I wanted to inquire as to a service that I might attend to honor her memory?” I asked while trying to hold in my temper. I reminded myself that I was speaking to a grieving mother, and because I had never had to bury a child, I couldn’t imagine what she was going through right now.
“It’s at the Cathedral,” she said brusquely. “The details will be announced in the Post and Courier tomorrow.”
“Thank-”
There was a click that told me she had already hung up. “Well, that went well,” I grumbled to my empty bedroom.
“How did it go?” Davis asked as I walked downstairs to meet him and the others.
“I’m ready to get shit-faced,” I told him with a tinge of anger still in my voice.
“That well, huh?” Quinn asked from where he was perched on the arm of the couch.
I shrugged. “Mrs. Hart told me to look in the newspaper to find out when the service was.”
Mike flinched. “Damn.”
“You should post it on social media,” Rich suggested.
“What?”
He blushed. “Once you find out, I mean. It sounds like the Harts aren’t going to make it easy for any marines to say their final goodbyes to Hart, but we can get the word out.”
“Hart would have liked a crowd,” I said quietly.
“Then we’ll make it happen,” Rich promised.
A pang of guilt echoed through me at the thought of denying Mrs. Hart’s wishes, but I couldn’t help but think that her actions were motivated by the wrong reasons. She had never approved of Hart enlisting in the marines and had threatened to disown her several times.
I was trapped in my dark thoughts for the ride out to the bar. Apparently, this pack had their paws in a lot of different pots, because Austin owned this business too.
Mike cleared his throat, interrupting my thoughts. “This bar is full of veterans, but not all of them are wolves,” he warned me. “So we still need to behave.” “I can handle myself,” I assured him.
Rich drove up to the front door, and I looked at him in confusion when everyone else got out, but he stayed in the driver’s seat. “You’re not coming in?” I asked.
Rich shook his head. “Nah, the bar scene isn’t my thing.”
“Rich doesn’t like to drink,” Quinn informed me as he headed for the door.
“Call me if you need a ride back,” Rich called to Trevor. Trevor waved a hand at him before disappearing inside the bar.
“Take it easy tonight,” Davis told him. “We can Uber home.”
“Cool,” Rich said with a grin. “Fortnite awaits.”
After giving him a wave, I walked into the bar and was surprised to see a pub-like atmosphere. I had expected a rougher place, but it looked like it could function as a family lunch spot during the day. There was a bar off to the right, past several rows of booths and tables, and a couple of pool tables in the back. What caught my eye was the round Fallen Comrade Table in the right corner. It’s bright white tablecloth, and elegant dinnerware were out of place in the casual environment, but that was the point.
Mike followed my gaze. “We can add her name,” he said gently. “There’s a book of remembrance.”
I swallowed and strode over to the table, staring at the framed photos above it. Marines, soldiers, airmen, and sailors all graced the wall from World War II to Vietnam to our current conflict. I gently touched the red rose and was surprised to feel the soft touch of real petals. Whoever maintained this must add a fresh flower every day. Tears came to my eyes as I marveled at the care that had been dedicated to this memorial for those that had fallen in service. The tablecloth was crisp and white, the silverware polished, and the upside-down goblet was spotless.
Davis nudged me and pressed a salt shaker into my hand. “To add a pinch to the bread plate.”
I nodded. There was already a slice of lemon there to symbolize the bitter fate of the warriors who had lost their lives. The salt that I sprinkled next to it represented the tears that their loved ones had shed in remembrance of the fallen. There was a framed explanation that listed the symbolism of each item on the table, but I was already familiar with the tradition. Next to the frame, there was a gold embossed book. Each page of the book was handwritten with the name of a fallen service member and a brief synopsis of their life and death.
Mike turned it to an empty page for me, and Davis handed me a pen. “You don’t have to but-”
“I want to,” I interrupted.
I wrote Isabel Grace Hart: US Marine on the top of the page and then stopped. How do I summarize her entire life and death in just a few sentences? I fought the urge to chew on the end of the pen and instead pressed it to the paper.
She defied all expectations and bravely forged her own path in life. The enemy may have taken her life, but they can never extinguish her fighting spirit or erase her memory. She was a true warrior and will never be forgotten.
I carefully wiped below my eyes, glad I had opted for waterproof mascara and eyeliner tonight. My eyes had gotten a little watery, but I hadn’t embarrassed myself by actually crying.
“C’mon, I’ll buy you a shot,” Davis offered as he took my arm.
“We don’t get free drinks?” I teased him, trying to ignore the lump that still stubbornly sat in my throat. “What’s pack association worth these days?”
Mike laughed. “Austin isn’t stupid. Free drinks for life for a bunch of veterans can go horribly wrong pretty quickly. Drinking the pain away can be a tempting solution.”
Davis shot him a concerned look but didn’t say anything. I wonder if Mike had a drinking problem? Trevor and Quinn had both seemed cautious when Mike had mentioned the bar earlier. But if he did, wouldn’t they attempt to talk him out of coming here? Why support the habit by giving him a ride and walking him through the door?
I sidled up to the bar where Trevor was nursing what looked like bourbon. “First round is on me,” I announced. “I have combat pay I need to blow through.”
It was time to get my swagger back, and alcohol would help.
Quinn had disappeared to the pool tables in the back with some of his pack mates, so when I waved down the bartender, so I asked for four shots of Jack instead of five. I grabbed one of the glasses and raised it after the bartender slid them over. “To the start of a good night!”
Mike, Davis, and Trevor all raised their glasses to my toast, and the alcohol burned going down. I grinned when four glasses hit the counter and Mike immediately raised his hand to the bartender, ready to go again. Let’s hope these wolves could handle their alcohol, because it was about to get real.
It wasn’t long before I had lost count of the drinks I’d had, and I was feeling pretty relaxed. It was probably just the haze of alcohol, but for the first time in years, I felt like I was somewhere I belonged. I was having fun flirting with Mike and Davis and enjoyed poking at Trevor. Quinn was the perfect partner in crime for getting under Trevor’s skin and I could a
lready see that this was going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
After the last round of shots, Davis had gone to the men’s room, and Quinn had challenged Trevor to a game of pool. When I had shot him an irritated look, Quinn had winked at me. “You did an admirable job getting him drunk, but I’m not missing out on an opportunity to actually win a game against him.”
They disappeared into the back, and I took another swig of my beer. I sensed the weight of Mike’s eyes on me and looked up into his gorgeous blue eyes. “What?”
He shrugged. “Females who seek out infantry positions are rare, and I’ve never even seen a female shifter in the military before. Just wondering what brought you there.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m tired of having my gender being used to define who I am. Not every female shifter wants a mate and pups, just like not every female human wants a husband and kids.” I took another sip of my beer and looked at him pointedly. “Why aren’t you mated?”
I saw a flash of pain in Mike’s eyes before he downed the rest of his drink. “I was married,” he said as he raised a hand to the bartender. “And now I’m not.”
An awkward silence settled over us, and I couldn’t help but feel like an asshole. Davis slid back up to the bar, and the bartender slid more beers in our direction. “What did I miss?” Davis asked casually.
Mike shrugged and pushed away from the bar without speaking. Davis watched him go then turned to me. “He was talking about his wife?”
“Not really,” I murmured as I traded my drained beer for a fresh one.
Davis sighed and leaned forward, resting his tattooed arms on his thighs. “As long as he’s sober, he’s fine. But once he starts drinking, it’s like the floodgate opens and brings in all his regrets of the past.”
“What happened?” I asked softly.
“You know what it’s like, being deployed,” Davis said. “But neither of us really knows what it’s like to be the one that’s left behind. We aren’t home alone waiting and wondering if our loved ones will make it home to us.”
I frowned in confusion. “His wife was active-duty?”
“Civilian,” Davis said with a shake of his head. “She didn’t cope well with never knowing where he was or if he was safe. But she knew how dangerous his job was.” I raised an eyebrow at him in question.
“Air Force Combat Controller,” Davis said in explanation.
I nodded with respect. Those guys would free-fall parachute into the middle of enemy territory and were often among the first into the most hostile environments. They would get attached to SEAL, Ranger, or Delta force teams and would establish assault zones, call in air strikes, and run some of the most dangerous missions behind enemy lines. Their training was beyond intense and had a ninety-five percent dropout rate. Mike was definitely among the most elite warriors that the US had.
Davis spun his bottle of beer on the counter before putting it back on the coaster. “He knew she started using prescription benzos to help with her anxiety, but he had no idea how bad her drug use had gotten. She had turned to street drugs and overdosed on Percocet that had been laced with fentanyl one night. He was in the middle of a sensitive mission in the Middle East and out of range of communication. By the time the Red Cross got word to his chain of command, and they were able to recall him, she had been dead for over a week.” “Damn,” I said softly.
Davis gave me a crooked smile that didn’t touch his eyes. “I’m sure you can figure out the rest of the story from there.”
I gave a sharp nod. I knew all about dealing with the guilt that comes from losing someone that you loved. I’m sure that Mike wonders what would have happened if he had been home that night. Would they be a happy couple in love right now if he had chosen an accounting career instead of one of the most dangerous professions on the planet?
“How long ago?” I asked quietly.
Davis shrugged. “Years. I think he clings to her memory because he feels too guilty to move on.”
I clenched my teeth. “Move on?” I said bluntly. “Is it ever that easy? Is it fair to them to just forget that they ever existed?”
Davis shook his head. “Do you think your buddy would want you to be miserable for the rest of your life? Or do you think she would want you to take advantage of every second of life that you had?”
The fight bled out of me. I knew what Hart would say if she’d been here now. She would tell me to drink up, get it all out of my system, and then get up tomorrow and be ready for the next fight. She wouldn’t have let me mope around or give up.
“Think about it,” Davis murmured as he stood. “I need to drag Mike back in here before he forgets what tonight is about. Order us another round of shots?” “Yeah,” I mumbled as I nursed my beer.
“I’ll be back soon,” he murmured into my ear with a throaty growl that had my body responding. Talk about emotional whiplash.
I rolled my eyes when it took less than a minute for a stranger to slide into Mike’s vacated bar stool. My nostrils flared when I took in the scent of cologne that was too strong but couldn’t mask the underlying scent of a human.
“Come here often?” he asked with a cocky smirk.
I turned to look at him slowly, but I really wasn’t in the mood for this type of guy. The dude was good-looking in an overly groomed way, but his attractiveness paled beside the guys I had arrived with. In the first thirty seconds of our one-sided conversation, he told me he did CrossFit and would only consume organic food. I had wanted to ask him if his Bud Light was organic, but I held it in for the moment. Getting laid would be a good distraction from the shitstorm I was dealing with right now, and it was something that Hart would have encouraged. But this guy was a hard pass, especially when contrasted with Trevor, Mike, and Davis.
As much as I pretended to have a casual attitude towards hookups, I was actually quite picky about who I’d sleep with. Because of that, my list was a lot smaller than I’d ever be willing to admit to. A small part of the reason for that was my panther instincts. I couldn’t turn off half of who I was just because I was in human form. I was an alpha, which meant I either needed a man who was alpha enough for me to submit to without lessening myself, or I needed a man who recognized my strength and respected me for it. This guy sitting in front of me was neither. He probably liked to think he was an alpha with the way he talked and with the cocky tilt of his chin, but he would squeal like a little boy if he was ever faced with true conflict.
I rolled my eyes when he told me he couldn’t join the army because he would’ve punched a drill sergeant. What was he doing in a Veteran bar? My eyes drifted over the rest of the crowd and lingered on Trevor’s strong shoulders. I tossed back the rest of my drink and slammed the glass back down on the table before I caught the bartender’s eye and slid some cash in his direction. Douchebag trailed off in mid-sentence, probably realizing I had stopped listening to his bullshit.
“Good luck with all that,” I told him dismissively as I hopped off my barstool and strutted over to where Trevor was being moody in a dark booth while waiting for the next pool table to open up. I could feel Trevor’s magic brush up against me as soon as I was close, and I smiled. Trevor liked me; he just wouldn’t admit it. He pretended to ignore me as he kept his eyes on the game on the TV, but I knew he was well aware of my proximity.
Trevor tossed back the rest of his drink and finally acknowledged my presence. He met my gaze, and the heat in his eyes seared me to the bone. Magic crackled between us, and his eyes widened for less than a second before they went back to hooded. He had to be feeling this, whatever it was.
“Things not going well?” Trevor nodded in douchebag’s direction.
I shrugged and leaned a hip against the booth. “Not what I’m looking for.”
Davis came up beside me with Mike in tow. “I’m up,” Trevor growled as he slid out of the booth.
Davis ran his eyes over my body in a caress. “What is it that you’re looking for?” he murmured in a low tone tha
t had my nether regions responding. This guy had game, I had to give him that. I had no doubt that a few heated looks and whispered promises were all that it took for him to get any girl he wanted. But I wasn’t just any girl.
I shrugged. “A decent ride on a guy who can give me what I need.”
“I know exactly what it is you need,” he growled as he moved into my space. I forced my legs not to quiver as he leaned forward and inhaled my scent.
“What’s with the abrupt change in mood?” I asked, not willing to show him just how much he was affecting me.
Davis moved behind me and placed a hand on my hip so he could murmur in my ear. “Is it that abrupt? We were just talking about living life to the fullest. I can’t think of a better way to do it.” I tried to keep my heart rate under control, but it was a lost battle. The musky scent of males and the warmth radiating from their hard bodies was sending my hormones into overdrive.
Mike smiled as he leaned in closer. “Heard a rumor that you’re looking for more than just a drinking buddy.”
I narrowed my eyes at him suspiciously. It wasn’t too long ago that he had stormed out because I had hit a nerve about his long-lost love. And now he was looking to get down and dirty? “Trevor told you a random dude was hitting on me, so you rushed back here to throw your names in the hat?” I proposed.
Mike had the decency to look sheepish, but Davis shrugged. “We share well, and I promise you won’t regret it.”
“As much as I’m flattered, boys,” I said as I patted Mike on the chest. “I’m not willing to be the warm body you use to forget your pain for the moment.”
I turned back to face Davis. “And I’m not looking to be just another conquest for a notch in your belt.” I ran my hands up Davis’s well-muscled chest. “I make the conquests,” I purred into his ear.
I licked my lips and watched as his eyes followed the movement. “But you can buy the next round of drinks.”
Davis grinned at me. “Game on.”
I smiled back at him. There was nothing I loved more than a challenge. And making him want me more than I wanted him? Having him begging for just a kiss? That sounded like a game I’d like to play.
Finding Buried Secrets: A Seaside Wolf Pack Novel Page 7