by JL Bryan
“That’s terrible,” Erin whispered.
“Six million units sold so far,” Cayce said. “And that’s just his debut album, ‘Smoovin’ On Up.’ Wait until the follow-up drops. He’s huge in Japan, too. That’s why we tossed all those cartoon cyborg mutant girls into his new video. And Heath is going to do the same for your group.”
Jason and Erin shared a worried look.
“This sounds great!” Zach said. He took Erin’s hand. “This is huge, Erin. I’m so proud of you.”
“Really?” Erin beamed.
“That’s step one, make a great album,” Cayce said. He swiped a hand across the screen, and another logo appeared: HMMRadio. “Step two, we shoot you out over Malarkay’s eleven hundred FM stations around the world. We’ll pick a hit and play it once an hour in every major city until nobody can get it out of their skulls.”
“Sounds good to me,” Mitch said.
“On top of that,” Cayce said, “Malarkay Media also owns a few dozen television channels, including a little trendmaking channel called Top Video Television.”
“You own TVTV?” Jason asked.
“Mr. Malarkay does.” Cayce pulled up the familiar glowing logo. “We push your videos right here on our channel. Then we report your sudden glamorous rise to success on our news channels.”
“Is this for real?” Dred asked. “What’s the catch?”
“You are. The four of you.” Cayce pulled out four manila envelopes from a pocket behind the screen. “The Assorted Zebras.”
He tossed the envelopes on the table. Each was printed with one of their names.
“Mr. Malarkay likes to gamble,” Cayce said. “Honestly, he loves to gamble. I’m not sure he loves much else. But he bets big, and he’s very lucky. Now he wants to bet on you. And we want to get in here before every big label comes bugging you with their petty offers. We are ready to turn you into a hugely marketable property. And I mean now. Sign those contracts, and I’ll have you playing stadiums inside of a year. I guarantee it.”
Jason looked at the thick envelope with his name printed on it. All four of them stared at the envelopes as if they were burning hot, too dangerous to touch. Then Mitch grabbed the one with his name.
“In addition,” Cayce said, “Mr. Malarkay offers each of you a signing bonus of one hundred thousand dollars when I receive your autographed contract—if I receive them within the next twenty-four hours.”
“We only have twenty-four hours to decide?” Dred asked.
“Take all the time you like to decide,” Cayce said. He waved his hand, and his assistant folded up the screen so that it looked like a briefcase again. “But if all four of you happen to sign within the next twenty-four hours, you each receive a hundred-thousand-dollar signing bonus. It’s your choice.”
“That’s kind of crazy,” Jason said.
“If you’re going to be part of the Malarkay family, get used to two things,” Cayce told him. “Mr. Malarkay’s unusual sense of humor, and enormous amounts of money sloshing around.”
“I could get used to those things,” Mitch said.
“So, what are we thinking, Assorted Zebras?” Cayce asked. “Because I have to say, I’m getting a very positive vibe off this group. All four of you.”
“You haven’t said anything about the music,” Erin said.
“The music’s obviously fantastic,” Cayce said. “Everybody knows that. What’s there to discuss?”
“Will we go on tour?” Mitch asked.
“Oh, of course. The Americas, Europe, Asia, India. It’ll be a great time. And that reminds me. Jason. Erin. You are both under eighteen.”
“Yeah?” Jason said.
“So your parent or legal guardian will have to co-sign. Everything’s highlighted and tagged for you, just go through and sign the blanks. Yellow highlight means you sign, orange means parent signs. Pretty easy, am I right?”
“We have to get our parents to sign?” Erin asked.
“One parent. Or legal guardian. Unless you’re an emancipated minor. Are you?”
Erin shook her head.
“Well, if you want to sue your parents to become one, just let me know. Whatever keeps the music flowing,” Cayce said.
“Wow.” Erin gaped at him. “Um, thanks?”
“You got it!” Cayce grinned. “Any other questions?”
“Tour bus,” Mitch said. “We have to have a sweet bus. With bunks.”
“And a driver who isn’t me,” Dred said.
“Naturally,” Cayce said. “What else?”
“When would we go to Ireland?” Jason asked.
“As soon as you sign those babies and get your bags packed,” Cayce said. “Mr. Malarkay likes to roll while the table’s hot. They’ll send a company jet to your local airport. It will be a comfortable flight, I promise. More questions? I feel like we’ve got a good give and take going here.”
Jason, Erin, Dred and Mitch gave each other shocked, stunned looks.
“This is amazing!” Zach put his arms around Erin and hugged her close. “We’re going to be so famous.”
“Any questions? Offer of a lifetime here, folks,” Cayce said.
“I think we’re probably going to go for it,” Mitch said. “Right? Everyone?”
Erin frowned. “Let’s talk it over.”
“Good, good, talk it over.” He tossed a handful of business cards stamped with a gold-foil “M” on the table. “There’s my cell. I’m in town overnight, staying at the fascinating Brown Bear Lodge and Buffet. You guys decide you want to be rock stars, meet me back here at noon tomorrow. Velga, double cappuccino to go, I’ll be in the car, thanks.”
He walked out the front door, while Velga carried the briefcase screen to the front counter and ordered coffee for Cayce.
Outside, Cayce put on his sunglasses and climbed into the passenger seat of a rented black BMW.
“What do you think?” Mitch whispered. “This is it. This is everything we wanted.”
“Is it?” Erin said. “Becoming rich and famous stars overnight, is that what we really want?”
“Yes,” Mitch and Dred said.
“You can’t pass up an opportunity like this!” Zach told Erin. “You’d be crazy to turn it down.”
“Everybody wanted to go with Zig Kaplan yesterday,” Erin said. “I think he would make better music. I’m scared to think what Malarkay Records would do to our sound.”
“It’s not our sound,” Dred said. “It’s stolen magic. That’s what everyone wants, that magic.”
“They’re still my songs, though,” Erin said. “Kind of. The lyrics, anyway.”
“You cannot possibly be serious about saying ‘no,’” Zach said. “You have to do this, Erin! You have to!”
“You don’t really have to,” Jason said, and everybody but Erin scowled at him. “I mean, it’s no big deal. We can go with Zig, he was cool.”
“I’m not saying we turn it down. I just want to think it over. And see what’s really in this contract,” Erin said.
“That’s a good point,” Dred said. “I want to read it. And have a lawyer read it.”
“Good luck finding a lawyer on the weekend,” Mitch said. “He said they have to be signed tomorrow.”
“Why would he do that twenty-four hour thing?” Jason asked.
“Malarkay’s an eccentric billionaire,” Mitch said. “So he does eccentric billionaire things.”
“I say you guys should just go for it,” Zach said. “I mean, take the hundred thousand dollars. You know?”
“Did I miss something?” Dred pointed at Zach. “Is he in this band now? I don’t remember voting on that.”
“Hey, I’m just giving you my opinion, as an entertainment professional,” Zach said. “Just want to see my beautiful girl get her chance to shine.” He kissed Erin.
Jason rolled his eyes. Through the glass door of the coffee shop, he watched Velga hand Cayce his coffee, climb into the driver side and start the car. Jaso
n was still in shock from everything they’d just promised.
He opened the envelope and looked at the thick contract. Yellow sticky tabs stuck out at a dozen or more places that needed to be signed.