by Celeste Raye
The more Freya thought about it and talked about it, the more and more she got upset. Sometimes she felt like her whole life was a lie, and nothing that was told to her was the truth. It did not settle well with her at all.
“What do you think there is to know?”
“I don't know, Mom, just that something isn't right. I feel like you're keeping something from me. Most of the time, I feel like everybody is keeping something from me. Like they know something that I don’t, and I have a feeling that it's important. What is it that I don't know?”
Jillian stood up from the vanity seat and walked towards the mirror. She looked at her reflection for a moment before she caught her daughter staring at her from behind, and she placed a smile on her face.
Freya knew her mother well enough to know that the look that she had on her face was not a happy one. She was keeping something from her.
“It is not some big conspiracy, dear. I promise you.”
“Then what is it?”
“It was a love affair gone bad that threatened to tear apart the two families. One of the members of our family and one of the members of their family fell in love. There was a third party that was in love with the woman, and she chose his younger brother. The brothers fought, and one was killed.”
Freya shook her head. She had heard many versions of the story and none of them had sounded like that. There was usually a little death and a little romance, but nothing like that. If it was only a hundred or so years ago, then why didn’t her mother remember it? And if she did remember it, then why was she being so vague and even lying to her? Freya had to wonder why she didn’t remember it as well.
“I don't think that's how it went, Mother. Maybe you have heard so many stories that you can't keep your versions together either.”
“I will not be spoken to like this, Freya. You need to remember your place. That has always been your biggest problem, ever since you were a little girl.”
Freya really had no say in most things because while the humans had gone on with equality, the shifters were still in the dark ages. There had never been a female alpha, and at the rate things were going, they would never even let a female fight. It was always to be their place in life: beside and slightly behind their male counterparts.
“Well, I don’t agree with it. I don’t need people to tell me what ‘my place’ is. You may want to listen to that nonsense, but that doesn’t mean that I do.”
Freya regretted the words as soon as they were out of her mouth. She wanted to take them back but knew that she wasn’t going to be able to. It was out, and that was that.
“I am not the enemy, Freya; none of us are. I just wish you would listen to me. I know that you want to think that you know everything but all of this is said for your protection. Their family is no good and is certainly no good for you. I don’t want you to keep pushing this. It’s not done to make anything harder on you; it’s really not. I just want you to be safe, Freya, and you will never be safe around any Rands.”
Jillian thought that she was helping, beseeching her daughter in such a way, but that wasn’t the case at all. It just made Freya want to ask more questions.
“So, you’re not going to tell me what is really going on? Why is it that no one really knows? As much as this community likes to gossip, I can’t believe that there isn’t a real story out there. Why does no one know?”
“Memory is a funny thing, Freya. It comes and goes.”
Freya knew that there was no sense in talking to her mother about it. It was obvious that her mother didn’t understand what it was that she was trying to say. As much as she wanted to believe that everything was going to be okay, the truth was that it wasn’t.
What her mother told her, or didn’t tell her rather, just made Freya even more determined than ever, to find out the mystery. Someone, somewhere, had to know the real story, and she knew that she was going to figure it out, one way or another.
Chapter Eight
“I think we’re going to have a problem with Freya.”
Franklin looked over at his wife. “Yes, I think we do have a problem.”
He sighed and covered his face for a moment. As soon as he heard that the two of them had met, danced, and kissed at the party, he knew the truth. Franklin knew that it was coming.
“So, what are we going to do?”
The man shrugged and sat down on the edge of the bed, shrinking from the weight of the world on his shoulders.
“I don’t know what we are supposed to do, Jillian. You know that I worry about her just as much as you do.”
Jillian settled down next to him on the bed. She sat her head on his shoulder as she had done for centuries.
“Do you really think that we did the right thing?”
Franklin didn’t have an answer. After living for so long, he knew that there rarely was a ‘right’ way or a ‘wrong’ way. Things happened, consequences were always felt, and sometimes never seen beforehand. It was all how it was looked at. He knew that much to be true.
“We did what we had to do with the choices that were given to us. What more could have been done?”
There was no real answer for that, but that didn’t make it settle any easier with her. She wanted to pretend like everything was going to be okay.
“I don’t know, Franklin. I don’t really know. I just feel like everything is starting to fall apart.”
Franklin’s weathered hand pushed the light brown hair out of her face before he cupped her cheek.
“It will, and we will pick up the pieces, together. It’s what we’ve always done, and I’m sure that we will have to do it again. I know it.”
“And you’re not worried?”
She was looking to her husband to make everything better. Jillian needed confirmation that everything was going to be okay. It didn’t mean that she believed it but it was nice to hear, and it calmed her thoughts enough for her to think it through.
“No, I know that whatever happens, we will take care of it together. That’s all that matters. Nothing is going to tear our family apart.”
Jillian sighed. “I sometimes wish that she hadn’t taken after me so much. Why couldn’t she be like Lachlan?”
“I’m glad she isn’t. I am glad she is like you.”
“Not from the way you were yelling at her.”
“You know that it’s out of fear and love. I don’t know what else to do.”
“Me either.”
The two laid down and sought each other’s bodies for comfort. The more that Jillian thought about it, the harder it was for her to sleep. She remembered a time, not too long ago in hindsight, where she was right where her daughter was: in love and rebelling. Whether her husband believed it or not, it felt like they were at the beginning, of some very big changes.
Nik didn’t tell anyone that he was leaving; he just left. He was the leader of the pack, and there was much to do, but he didn’t have space in his mind for anything else. Nik didn’t like being so distracted. But the more he tried to fight all of the feelings going through him, the more he realized that it was impossible. He was never going to shake her if he didn’t see her again and get her out of his head once and for all.
His first stop was the small town outside of the one that her family lived in. Freya’s family was like the Rands. They had money and distinguished places in the town government. Nik knew that if he was going to have to see her, which he had decided that he must, he was also going to have to make contact without anyone knowing that he was in town.
That wasn’t that hard to do, considering most of the people in Williamsburg didn’t know him, but twice, Nik almost ran into a few people that did. They were most likely in the next town over for shopping. Nik was trying to get some information about the house and where exactly Freya was staying. He knew that the records were at the library, and he searched the floor plan to find out that she was on the third story. If he wasn’t who he was, Nik might have been deterred, but for him, it just made everythi
ng easier.
He waited until dark so that the cover of night would hide his actions and Nik made his way to Freya. If he hadn’t known where she was, Nik was sure that the yearning he felt for her would have somehow led him to her another way.
The closer he got, the more at ease he started to feel, knowing that she was near. Nik had never felt that way before, and as much as he wished to think that it was because of Ophelia’s words, he knew better. It was something else, some connection that the two of them shared that he’d never felt before, and Nik was bound and determined to find out what it was exactly.
Nik looked up at the window for a time, trying to plan what he was going to say and what he was going to do. He was lost on answers, full of questions. How was he supposed to articulate his feelings when he didn’t even understand them himself? The task felt impossible.
He went to the window that beckoned to him and he tapped lightly. Nik didn’t want to scare her, and he imagined that she didn’t have too many men coming to her window. Most likely, no one was stupid enough to draw the wrath of the family. Apparently, Nik was a fool.
After a moment, Freya came to the other side of the window and their gaze met through the glass. He was immediately happy to see her, but Nik waited for her response. This could all be in his head, he kept reminding himself.
She opened the window and finally smiled. “What are you doing here, Nik?”
He grinned and shrugged. “I don’t know, Freya. I just had to see you.”
“Well, here I am. Now what?”
There were guards around the building and he didn’t want to dally too long. He knew that things were going to get bad if he was seen.
“Are you going to let me in or are you coming with me?”
Freya looked back into her room and took his hand. “Take me with you, Nik.”
“Are you ready to ride?”
Freya smiled and agreed. “Yes, I think that would be perfect. I haven’t had a good night ride in a while.”
She waited for him to shift and then climbed onto his back. He took off from the roof as quietly as he could, trying not to make a sound. Nik’s heart was bursting, but with what?
Chapter Nine
Freya was thinking of Nik while languishing in bed, unable to get him out of her mind. Then, like he knew exactly what was needed, he was there. All she had wanted was to see his face, and now she could. Now she could say what needed to be said, but Freya was still afraid.
“I can't believe that you are here.”
“I can't believe that I am here either, Freya. I don't why I. I couldn't stop myself. I had to see you again.”
She was talking to him with her mind, and she could hear his answers as Freya lay down on the smooth scales underneath her and relaxed completely. They were high in the sky, and she didn't notice anything else.
She knew the strong and steady flap of wings; it was familiar. It felt like she heard it before. It was another instance of feeling something familiar, yet slightly out of her grasp.
They rode like that for a while before he slowed down for the night. They landed in the middle of nowhere with a cabin in the clearing by the lake. She asked him where they were.
“This is one of my family’s homes. An older one, unoccupied. I thought it would be a good place for us to have a picnic.”
“It's almost nine, Nick. I don't think that it's time for a picnic.”
“Well since we can't go out in the middle of the day together, I think this is the only way. I have everything set up.”
“You knew that I would come with you?”
Nik shook his head and told her that he hadn’t been sure.
“I had certainly hoped.”
Freya smiled at the answer. Everything about the impromptu meeting was planned. She had not realized how badly she wanted to see him. Now that he was standing in front of her, it was impossible not to feel like this was exactly where she wanted to be. She could see a little bit of light coming from the old cabin windows, and she took his hand as they walked towards it. Freya knew what they were going to do next. She remembered her mother's words but also the curiosity that she felt because of that. She had to know the truth.
When they got to the cabin, he opened the door and let her see the spread that he had devised. Candles were everywhere, and she stopped counting them when he took her hand and led her into the second room. There was a table and chairs, with flowers and candles on it.
She was overwhelmed by everything in front of her, and only when she saw what was in the bowl on the table did she laugh. “Pickles? Really?”
“It is your favorite, so how could I resist?”
Freya didn’t know what to say, but she knew that he was pulling out all of the stops. He wanted her to feel the way he did, and Freya was worried about what was going to happen when she gave herself to him. It was still wrong on so many levels.
“Thank you, Nik. You are incredibly sweet and thoughtful. I would have never thought of this.”
Nik grinned back at her, and she avoided his gaze, sitting down in the seat that he pulled out instead. It seemed like the safer move. Anything that had to do with getting a moment to breathe seemed like a good idea. Freya had to remind herself that she was there for a reason. She wanted answers.
“So, I have to ask you something.”
“Shoot.”
Nik sat down next to her and poured them both some wine while Freya tried to formulate her feelings and thoughts into words that would make sense and not confuse him. It was complicated, and Freya was losing her nerve more and more the longer she was with him.
“I need to know why our families hate each other so much.”
“I don’t know. It’s all very vague and every time I’ve asked about it lately, I get another story. There is a thread of similarities, but not much more than that.”
“I couldn’t get a straight answer either. Do you remember it? You’re a little older than me, right?”
“How old are you?”
“A little over one-fifty.”
“Yes, but not by much.”
“So how do we not remember something like that from not that long ago? We were old enough to remember.”
He shrugged. “I have no idea.”
“I asked my mom, and she said memory comes and goes. It made no sense, and now I wonder what I was doing when it happened, but there is no real date.”
“Eat your pickles and don’t worry about it. I thought we weren’t going to stress over the family drama.”
“I know. I am trying to figure it out, and I just don’t understand it. I wish I knew so that I could make a real decision. I need the details.”
“I used to think that I could just let it go. I didn’t really care why we hated your family. It’s pretty normal for people that live as long as we do. Rivalries and enemies are just a part of it.”
“That’s harsh.”
“But true.”
“You sound like my brother.”
“Well, I guess that he probably heard that same thing as I did grow up. It’s easy to hate when it’s all you hear.”
“I hear it, but I just ignore it. It’s the men’s problem, not mine.”
“It seems to be our problem now, though, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, it does. I wish that someone could give me an answer.”
“Would it change the way you feel about me?”
Freya had to stop and think for a moment. She liked to think that it wouldn’t, but she wasn’t sure if that was true or not.
“I don’t think it would, but you can admit that this is a mess. We’re not supposed to feel anything for each other. I don’t know why I do. I feel like I have known you for so long, and then this…”
She gestured to the set-up, and it was more than she could take with a straight face and calm voice. Her voice started to break, and her eyes burned, so she looked away to hide the emotions that were far stronger than they should have been.
“I just wanted to put a
smile on your face. I don’t want to upset you.”
“It’s just sweet, that’s all. And I feel like we should be able to see where this leads. Don’t you get sick of people telling you who you can and can’t see? It drives me crazy.”
“I try not to worry about it.”
“Yet you came to my window, and not the front door.”
“You know why.”
“I know, but that’s my point. Why can’t we see what happens without all of the extra pressure? I wish we could stay here for a long time.”
Chapter Ten
That gave Nik an idea. The whole time that he was planning on going to see Freya, he had been wondering if once he saw her again, his focus could be off of her. That had been the plan, but now he knew that it wasn't going to be enough. One night with her wasn't going to be enough to satisfy whatever craving he had for her.
“Why don't we go to one of my family's other houses? It would give us some time away from both families, but it would be in my territory, and we wouldn't have to worry about your father's people looking for you. We could just disappear for a while. And there are more amenities. As much as I like this cabin, I like electricity that I don't have to fill a generator for.”
“I will go wherever you want to go. I just want to be with you, Nik. I know that it doesn't make any sense, but that's just how it is. Tell me that I am not crazy and you feel this way too.”
The fact was that, for whatever reason, he was attached to Freya and the best way to figure out what was going to happen next was to let it play out. He wanted more time to get to know her and to get closer. What Nik wanted from Freya was going to be off limits for the time being. She was not going to give it up so quickly and freely. He was going to have to work for it.
They had dinner and discovered that they knew even more about each other than they thought they would. He played a song that kept running in his head when he thought of Freya, and sure enough, it was her favorite song. It was a very old song that he didn't even remember hearing, but it had started playing in his head and he couldn't get it to stop. There were several weird moments like that.