“Before his classes, I had no clue how to put heart into a story, but he took the time to teach me what it looked like—heart, passion, love. He was the greatest teacher of those three subjects.” Graham picked up his pieces of paper and ripped them in half. “And if he were to grade this speech of mine, he’d fail me. My words speak on his achievements in his career. He was an amazing scholar and received numerous awards that recognized his talents, but that’s just fluff.” Graham chuckled, along with other students who’d had Ollie as a professor. “We all know how Oliver hated when people added extra fluff to their papers to reach the required word counts. ‘Add muscle, not fat, students.’ So now, I’ll just add the strongest muscle—I’ll add the heart. I’ll tell you the core of who Professor Oliver was.
“Oliver was a man who loved unapologetically. He loved his wife and his daughter. He loved his work, his students, and their minds. Oliver loved the world. He loved the world’s flaws, he loved the world’s mistakes, he loved the world’s scars. He believed in the beauty of pain and the glory of better tomorrows. He was the definition of love, and he spent his life trying to spread that love to as many people as he could. I remember my sophomore year, I was so mad at him. He gave me my second F, and I was so pissed off. I marched straight to his office, barged in uninvited, and right as I was about to shout at him for this outrageous issue, I paused. There he was, sitting at his desk crying with his face in the palms of his hands.”
My stomach tightened as I listened to Graham’s story. His shoulders drooped, and he tried his best to hold himself together as he continued speaking. “I’m the worst person in those situations. I don’t know how to comfort people. I don’t know how to say the right things—that was normally his job. So, I just sat. I sat across from him as he sobbed uncontrollably. I sat and allowed him to feel his world falling apart until he could voice what was hurting him so deeply. It was the day one of his former students committed suicide. He hadn’t seen the student in years, but he remembered him—his smile, his sadness, his strength—and when he learned that the student passed away, Ollie’s heart broke. He looked at me and said, ‘The world’s a little darker tonight, Graham.’ Then he wiped away his tears and said, ‘But still, I must believe that the sun will rise tomorrow.’”
Tears flooded Graham’s eyes, and he took a beat to catch his breath before continuing, speaking directly to Ollie’s family. “Mary, Karla, Susie, I tell stories for a living, but I’m not very good with words,” he said softly. “I don’t know what I can say to make any sense of this. I don’t know what the meaning of life is or why death interrupts it. I don’t know why he was taken away, and I don’t know how to lie to you and tell you everything happens for a reason. What I do know for a fact is that you loved him, and he loved you with every ounce of heart that he possessed.
“Maybe someday that fact will be enough to help you through each day. Maybe someday that fact will bring you peace, but it’s okay if that day’s not today, because it’s not that day for me. I don’t feel peace. I feel cheated, sad, hurt, and alone. All my life I never had a man to look up to. I never knew what it meant to be a true man until I met Professor Oliver. He was the best man I’ve ever known, the best friend I’ve ever had, and the world’s a lot darker tonight because he’s gone. Ollie was my father,” Graham said, tears freely falling down his cheeks as he took one final deep breath. “And I will forever be his son.”
For the past few nights, I’d been sharing a bed with Graham. He seemed to be more at peace when he wasn’t alone, and all I wanted was for him to find a little bit of peace. The May rain showers had been coming down heavily, and it was our background music as we fell asleep.
One Sunday morning, I woke up in the middle of the night due to the sound of thunder, and I rolled over in the bed to see that Graham was missing. Climbing out of bed, I went to see if he was with Talon, but once I reached her nursery, I saw she was sleeping calmly.
I walked throughout the house searching for him, and it wasn’t until I stepped into the sunroom that I saw a shadow in the garden. I quickly tossed on my rain boots and grabbed an umbrella, walking outside to see him. He was soaked from head to toe with a shovel in his hands.
“Graham,” I called after him, wondering what it was he was doing until I glanced over at the shed where a large tree was leaning, waiting to be planted.
Ollie’s tree.
He didn’t turn back to look toward me. I wasn’t even certain he heard my voice. He just kept shoveling into the ground, digging a hole that would hold the tree. It was heartbreaking watching him soaking wet, digging deeper and deeper. I walked over to him, still holding my umbrella, and lightly tapped him on his shoulders.
He turned to me, surprised to see me standing there, and that was when I saw his eyes.
The truth lies in his eyes, Ollie had told me.
That night I saw it, and I saw that Graham was breaking. His heart was breaking minute by minute, second by second, so I did the only thing I could think to do.
I placed the umbrella on the ground, picked up another shovel, and started to dig right there beside him.
No words were exchanged—none were needed. Each time we tossed the earth’s soil to the side, we took a breath in honor of Ollie’s life. Once the hole was large enough, I helped him carry the tree over, and we placed it down, covering the base back up with mud.
Graham lowered himself down to the ground, sitting in the mess of nature while the rain continued to hammer down on us. I sat down beside him. He bent his knees and rested his hands on top of them with his fingers laced. I sat with my legs crossed and my hands in my lap.
“Lucille?” he whispered.
“Yes?”
“Thank you.”
“Always.”
25
Graham
“Lucille?” I called from my office late one afternoon. Over the past few weeks, I’d forced myself to sit at my desk and write. I knew that was what Professor Oliver would’ve wanted me to do. He would’ve wanted me to not give up.
“Yes?” she questioned, stepping into the room.
My heart skipped. She looked exhausted—no makeup, messy hair, and absolutely everything I’d ever wanted.
“I, um, I have to send a few chapters to my editor, and normally, Professor Oliver would read them, but…” I grimaced. “Do you think you could read them for me?”
Her eyes widened and her smile stretched wide. “Are you kidding? Of course. Let me see.”
I handed her the papers, and she sat down across from me. She crossed her legs and began to read, taking in all my words. As her eyes stayed glued to the paper, my stare was stuck on her. Some nights I wondered what would’ve happened without her. I wondered how I would’ve survived without the hippie weirdo in my life.
I wondered how I’d gone so long without telling her she was one of my favorite people in the whole wide world.
Lucy Palmer had saved me from the darkness, and I’d never be able to thank her enough.
After some time, her eyes watered over and she bit her bottom lip. “Wow,” she whispered to herself as she kept flipping the pages. She was deeply focused as she read my words, taking her time. “Wow,” she muttered again. When she finished, she placed all of the pages in her lap and shook her head slightly before looking at me, and then she said, “Wow.”
“You hate it?” I asked, crossing my arms.
“It’s perfect. It’s absolutely perfect.”
“Would you change anything?”
“Not a single word. Ollie would be proud.”
A small sigh left my lips. “Okay. Thank you.” She stood up and started walking toward the door, and I called after her once. “Do you think you’d want to be my plus one for Karla and Susie’s wedding?”
A gentle smile landed on her lips and she shrugged her left shoulder. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask me.”
“I wasn’t certain you’d want to come. I mean…it seems weird to take a friend to a wedding.”
The day of the wedding, I waited in the living room as Lucy finished getting ready in her bedroom. My chest was tight waiting to see her, and when she appeared, it was better than I could’ve ever imagined. She came out like a spark of perfection. She wore a floor-length baby blue gown and had baby’s breath twisted into her hair.
Her lips were painted pink, and her beauty was louder than ever.
Each second I saw her, I fell a little more.
Plus, she held Talon in her arms, and the way my daughter, my heart, snuggled into this woman made me fall even more.
We weren’t supposed to feel this way.
We weren’t supposed to fall for one another, she and I.
Yet it seemed gravity had a way of pulling us closer.
“You look beautiful,” I told her, standing up from the couch and smoothing out my suit.
“You don’t look half bad yourself.” She smiled as she walked over to me.
“Dada,” Talon said, babbling and reaching out to me. Every time she spoke, my heart grew in size. “Dadadada.”
I’d never known love could be so real.
I took her into my arms and kissed her forehead as she kissed mine back. Lucy stepped forward, straightening out my bow tie, which she had picked out. She’d picked out my whole outfit. She was convinced my closet contained too much black, so she had forced me out of my comfort zone with a light gray suit and a baby blue polka dot bow tie.
We drove to Lucy’s employee, Chrissy’s, house before heading to the ceremony. Chrissy had said she’d take care of Talon for the evening, and a part of me worried. Talon had never spent time with anyone other than Lucy or me, but Lucy told me she trusted Chrissy, and in turn, I trusted Lucy.
“If you need anything, you have our numbers,” I told Chrissy as I handed her Talon, who seemed timid at first.
“Ah, don’t you worry, we’re going to have a great time. All you two have to worry about is having a great time tonight. Embrace each moment.”
I gave her a tight smile before leaning in to kiss Talon’s forehead one last time.
“Oh, and, Graham? I’m sorry about your father. Professor Oliver seemed like a great man,” Chrissy told me.
I thanked her as Lucy took my hand and squeezed it lightly.
As we walked to the car, I turned her way. “You told her he was my father?” I asked.
“Of course. He was your father, and you were his son.”
I swallowed hard and opened her car door to help her in. As she climbed inside, I waited a second before shutting the door. “Lucille?”
“Yes?”
“You make the world a lot less dark.”
We arrived at the ceremony about ten minutes before it was going to begin and sat in a middle row on the edge of the aisle. The space was surrounded by beautiful flowers, which Lucy herself had arranged for the event and set up earlier that morning. She was the best at making every moment beautiful.
When it was time, everyone in attendance stood up as Susie walked down the aisle first with her arm looped through her father’s. She was smiling wide and looked breathtaking in her white gown. Once she made it to the front, her father kissed her cheek and took his seat. Then, the music shifted and it was Karla’s turn. She looked like an angel, holding her beautiful bouquet of pink and white roses. Her dress flowed effortlessly, but her steps seemed to be a struggle. With each one she took, I could tell what was weighing on her heart—she was missing her father, the man who was supposed to be walking her down the aisle on the happiest day of her life.
Halfway down the aisle, her steps stopped, she covered her mouth with her hand, and she began sobbing, the overwhelming pain of the situation swallowing her whole.
Within seconds, I was there. My arm wrapped around hers, I leaned in closer to her, and I whispered, “I have you, Karla. You’re not alone.”
She turned to me, her eyes filled with broken pieces of her soul, and she wrapped her arms around me. She took a few seconds to fall apart, and I held her each second that passed. When she was strong enough, I kept her arm linked with mine and walked her down the aisle.
The officiant smiled wide when we reached the end of the aisle. Susie’s eyes locked with mine for a moment and she silently thanked me. I simply nodded once.
“Who gives this beautiful bride away?” the officiant asked.
I stood tall, staring straight at Karla. “I do.” I wiped a few of her tears away and smiled. “With every ounce of my being, I do.”
Karla turned and hugged me so tight, and I held her close to me as she softly spoke. “Thank you, brother.”
“Forever, sister.”
I walked back to my seat and sat beside Lucy, who had tears streaming down her face. She turned to me and gave me the greatest smile I’d ever seen. Her lips parted and she whispered, “I am in love with you,” and then she turned to face the ceremony.
Within seconds, my heart filled with more love than I had thought possible.
Because that was the thing about hearts—when you thought they were completely full, you somehow found room to add a little more love.
Loving Lucy Hope Palmer wasn’t a choice; it was my destiny.
The rest of the ceremony ran smoothly. The evening was filled with love, laughter, and light—and dancing. So much dancing.
When a slow song came on, Mary walked over to me and held her hand out, asking me for a dance. I stood up and walked her to the dance floor. As she placed her hand on my shoulder, we started to sway.
“What you did for Karla…I’ll never be able to thank you enough for that,” Mary said, a tear rolling down her cheek.
I leaned in and kissed her tear away before it could hit the floor. “Anything you ladies need, I am here for you. Always, Mary. Always.”
She smiled and nodded. “I always wanted a son.”
“I always wanted a mom.”
We danced, and she laid her head against my shoulder, allowing me to guide our moves. “The way you look at her,” she said, speaking of Lucy. “The way she looks at you…”
“I know.”
“Let her in, my dear. She makes you feel the way Ollie made me feel—whole—and a love like that isn’t something one should ever pass up. There might be a million reasons why you think it couldn’t work, but all you need is one reason why it could. That reason is love.”
I knew she was right about Lucy and love.
If love were a person, it would be her.
When our dance finished, Mary kissed my cheek and said, “Tell her. Tell her everything that scares you, everything that excites you, everything that moves you. Tell her all of it and let her in. I promise every moment will be worth it.”
I thanked her and took a breath as I turned around to see Lucy finishing up a dance with one of the older gentlemen in his seventies. I could hear Professor Oliver in my head, and I could feel him in my heart as it beat.
Be brave, Graham.
I met her at our table, and she sat down, beaming with happiness. It was as if happiness was the only mode she knew.
“Thank you for bringing me, Graham. This has been—”
I cut her off. There wasn’t a chance that I could wait one more minute. I couldn’t waste another second of time where my lips weren’t against hers. My mouth crashed into hers, making my mind swirl as I felt her lips on mine. I felt her entire being wrapping around my soul, soaking me in, changing me into a better man than I’d ever thought I could be. I’d died a million deaths before I gave living a chance, and my first breath of life was taken from her lips.
As I pulled away a bit, my hands stayed resting around her neck as my fingers slightly massaged her neck. “It’s you,” I whispered, our lips still slightly touching. “My greatest hope is, and alw
ays will be, you.”
And then, she kissed me back.
26
Lucy
We didn’t know how to act with one another after our first kiss. Our situation wasn’t the norm when it came to building a relationship. We did everything backward. I fell in love with a boy before our first kiss, and he fell for a girl who he wasn’t allowed to have. Our connection, our heartbeats, matched one another in our fairytale world, but in reality, society deemed us as an awful accident.
Maybe we were an accident—a mistake.
Maybe we were never supposed to cross each other’s paths.
Maybe he was only meant to be a lesson in life and not a permanent mark.
But still, the way he kissed me…
Our kiss was as if heaven and hell collided together, and each choice was right and wrong at the same exact time. We kissed as if we were making a mistake and the best decision all at once. His lips made me float higher, yet somehow descend. His breaths somehow made my heart beat faster as it came to a complete halt.
Our love was everything good and bad wrapped in one kiss.
The Elements Series Complete Box Set Page 98