She nodded. “H-how did you know he was my cousin?”
“I overheard him. I was in the car and saw your reaction, so I jumped out and ran to you. When I got there, he was asking if you were happy to see him. It was quite clear you weren’t.” He took her briefcase and escorted her to the car parked directly across the street.
As they drove, Kolson took in her appearance. Ashen-faced and trembling, he thought perhaps the last thing she needed was to be alone.
“Sam, take us to Antonio’s.”
“Sure thing, Mr. H.”
Kolson turned to Gabby and said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I thought you might need a little diversion and I know a great little place. You know how the Upper East Side has all these great neighborhood restaurants? Well I know the perfect one where we can sit for a little while. Sound good?”
“Yes. Thank you.” Her voice trembled as she answered.
“By the way, my real name is Kolson Hart. You can drop the Skippy.” He grinned.
His comment got a semblance of a smile out of her. “It’s nice to meet you Kolson.”
Sam dropped them off on East 83rd Street and they walked into a bistro where the host greeted Kolson by his first name. He showed them to a table in the back corner of the restaurant. Most New York restaurants were crowded and closed in, not allowing for intimate conversation, but this one was slightly different. It was dimly lit and their table was set in the back so it was much more private than the others.
“I hope this is okay. Since I know the owner, he’s fairly accommodating and it’s early so this table was open.”
“No, this is nice. Thank you.”
“Are you any better?”
“Yes, a little. I was just ... he just took me by surprise.”
“I could see that.”
The waiter came to their table and took their drink order. Gabby asked for water with lemon and Kolson ordered a glass of wine.
“Are you hungry?” Kolson asked.
“I don’t think I could eat.”
The waiter returned with their drinks and Kolson ordered an antipasti platter. Gabby smiled.
“At least I got a smile out of you.”
“Only because that will probably be huge.”
“Yeah, and they make a really good one here. I’m starving.”
They were silent.
Kolson cleared his throat. “The fact that your cousin scared the shit out of you wasn’t lost on me. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
Gabby nodded. If Kolson was hoping she’d open up, he was going to be disappointed.
“So, a psychiatrist, huh?”
“Yep. A shrink.”
The corners of his mouth turned up and her attention was drawn to that sexy scar of his.
“How’d you get that scar?”
His expression turned stony and he said, “A horse riding accident. Don’t take offense at this but you seem so young to be a physician.”
“No offense taken. I was a nerd.” She tugged on her collar. “No friends. You know the type. I finished high school a year early and then I did the same with college. That part was motivation for financial purposes.” She grimaced. “I went to Princeton and then Columbia Med School. Stacked up quite a bit of debt. And now I’m trying to get my private practice up and running but it’s not been easy.”
Kolson listened to her and knew how she must’ve racked up some serious financial obligations. Princeton was about forty grand a year in tuition. And Columbia Med School was about fifty grand. Neither of those figures included the cost of living or fees associated with it.
“It can’t be. Not starting out with that kind of debt hanging over your head.”
“I wish I could be at the point where I could afford to take cash, but I’m not established enough. Insurance reimbursement for psychiatrists is terrible. Sometimes I only get about twenty percent of what I bill, other times, fifty percent. It depends and each policy is different. I spend so much time trying to figure them out because I don’t have an insurance specialist. So that puts me further behind plus I have office rent I have to pay.”
“And I always thought psychiatrists were wealthy.”
She agreed with a small nod. “Most people do. But we’re not. Particularly when we’re starting out. I have to work shifts at the hospital to help out with my bills. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to complain.”
“You’re not complaining. You’re explaining. There’s a difference.”
Gabby reached out to touch the single rose bud that was in a vase and her sleeve slipped back off her wrist. Kolson noticed the scars that were previously hidden. Her other hand moved to cover her wrist. She glanced up at him to see if he’d noticed them. When she found him watching her, her body deflated.
“That’s a beautiful flower, isn’t it?”
“Yes,” she mumbled.
“It’s not nearly as beautiful as you are.”
Gabby wasn’t sure she heard him correctly, as she slanted her head.
“You don’t believe me, do you?”
“I uh, well, I ...” She twirled a piece of her hair.
Kolson laughed. “Believe me, Gabby. It’s the truth.”
The waiter showed up with their drinks, and right afterward, their antipasti platter. Gabby smiled at the size of it and at the way Kolson enjoyed eating.
“Are you laughing at me?” he asked.
“Not at all. I like to see people enjoy their food.”
“I wish you’d eat.”
“I think I will.” And she had a few bites, but that was all she could manage.
When they were finished, Kolson asked the waiter to box it up for him, and then gave it to Gabby to take home.
“You may find you’re hungry later tonight.”
She smiled and clasped his forearm. “Thank you. You’re very kind.” She pressed her fingers to her lips. Gabby wasn’t used to this type of treatment from complete strangers. Though she had spent the night at this man’s home, she was still a stranger to him.
The dinner had eased her worries a bit, but now that she was going home, thoughts of Danny were storming her mind again.
When they arrived at her building, he asked, “Would you like me to walk you upstairs?”
“Please.” Her voice was raspy and strained.
When he delivered her to her door and made sure her apartment was safe, he handed her a card. “If you need me, for anything at all, call.”
She looked at the card and it bore no name. Only a single phone number. She smiled. Reaching into her pocket, she said, “Here.” She handed him a card that looked identical to his with one exception. The number was different.
He turned to leave, but she stopped him with her hand. Gripping his arm with a firm hold, she said, “Thank you. I’m not sure how, but …” She squeezed her lids together and swallowed. Then she looked at him, caramel-colored eyes meeting multihued ones, and repeated herself, “Thank you for everything.” Her look imparted much more than gratitude. It conveyed to him exactly how much she appreciated what he had done for her.
He nodded and left. When he got back in the car, he said to Sam, “I want that man, Danny whoever he is, tracked. I want you to find out everything you can on him. He’s her cousin, but she doesn’t want anything to do with him. In fact, he scares the shit out of her. I’m putting Tom Barrett on it. There’s a reason, and it has to be deeply personal.”
“Got it, boss.”
“And Sam, if he ever touches her again, lays so much as a finger on her, and you’re near him, beat the fuck out of him. And I mean beat. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Him.”
“Yes, sir.”
Kolson was determined that Danny wouldn’t get close to Gabby again. If he was the one who had fucked up her life, Kolson would do his best to keep her safe. He knew what it was like to live in fear, to dread every minute of the day, and if he could prevent that from happening to her, he would do everything in his power to make it so.
Chapt
er Four
When the door closed behind Kolson, Gabby almost collapsed. How did he happen to be there when Danny showed up? What would’ve happened if he hadn’t been around? Gabby’s body shuddered so violently, she could barely unbutton her blouse. Maybe a hot shower would soothe her frayed nerves.
When the water was as hot as she could stand it, she stood beneath the spray and let it massage her knotted muscles. She stood there for so long, the spray turned chilly, forcing her out. The fluffy towel she wrapped in felt cozy, but her hands still trembled as she finished drying off.
What the hell was Danny up to and why wouldn’t he leave her alone? After she brushed her teeth and finished combing out her tangled hair, she put on her Snoopy pajamas and climbed into bed. Then she ran a Google search on herself, just to make sure her home address was not listed anywhere. If there were a hint of it anywhere, she would be on the hunt for a new apartment. Her body slumped with relief when her name only revealed her office address. She dug through her purse to make sure she still had her pepper spray and checked her nightstand for the one she kept there as well. All was as it should be. Every light was on in her house when she scooted down under her blankets and sleep finally claimed her.
“You’ll never tell anyone about this, because if you do, I’ll hurt you even worse the next time. You hear me, you little whore? And trust me, there will be a next time.”
His breath smelled like stale beer and cigarettes. She wanted to gag. But she didn’t because his hand was clamped over her mouth, causing her teeth to rip into the inside of her lips. The metallic flavor of blood seeped onto her tongue.
She squeezed her eyes shut, but he hissed, “Look at me. Don’t you stop looking at me. You hear? I want you to watch me when I fuck you.”
Gabby bolted up in bed with a muffled scream. Shit! The nightmares are back. Her pajamas were soaked clean through and her breath rushed in and out in rapid puffs.
Breathe, Gabby. Nice and easy.
She talked herself out of the panic attack, just like she had done countless times before. It had become a ritual for her. Inhale, one-two-three-four, hold-two-three-four, and exhale, one-two-three-four. Though she was always one tiny hair away from a panic attack, she was proud of the fact that she had learned to deal with them without the use of drugs.
Gabby looked around her tiny apartment, curious whether her life would always be like this. She’d chosen psychiatry as a way to help others, those who had been through life-changing events like she had. But in doing so, she’d wracked up thousands of dollars of debt. Her parents wouldn’t help—they’d booted her to the curb long ago.
She’d always be a softie where her services were concerned. If someone couldn’t afford them, she would only charge a nominal fee, or not charge at all. At that rate, she’d never dig out of the mountain of debt. She didn’t live extravagantly. Her apartment was tiny. Not a studio but not quite a full one bedroom, though her rent was higher because it was in a secure building. She couldn’t live any other way, not with Danny still threatening her. Between her office and her apartment rent, she was barely breaking even. And that didn’t include student loans from college and medical school, malpractice insurance, or other expenses. In a word, she was broke. Maybe she should’ve joined a group practice when she left her residency, but the ones she interviewed with didn’t want her moonlighting. They also didn’t afford her the flexibility to volunteer as much, or to offer her services for free to those who couldn’t pay, so that was another reason she opted to go it alone.
Last year when she’d finished her residency, she’d imagined a much different scenario—one that had her financially ahead of where she was right now. She refused to give up her dream though. It was too important. Helping those less fortunate was her driving force. She wanted to raise funds, when she was able, to open a place where the abused could find psychiatric services at affordable fees and if they didn’t have any funds at all, they could still be treated. She knew it was a pipe dream, but it was hers and she would do all she could to make it happen.
When she fisted the sheets in frustration, she realized they, along with her pajamas, were damp with sweat. So she changed both and when she returned to bed, it was after two in the morning. She doubted she’d be able to sleep.
Her eyes were riveted on her best friend—the ceiling. Over the years, it heard every one of her disgusting secrets, things that no one else knew, ever since that awful day. As she stared at it, the whispers began, like they did on so many nights.
“I wish someone had told me long ago that life would always be this grim. That damn Danny. I just don’t understand why he keeps doing this to me.”
“Gabby, don’t you dare ever breathe a word of this to anyone or I’ll fucking kill you. You hear me? I’ll kill you first and then I’ll kill that stupid drunk mother of yours. I’ll sneak into her bedroom while she’s passed out and smother her. And it’ll all be your fault. You understand me? And just so you know, I’ll come here and fuck you any time I want. Understand?”
Gabby knew she never should’ve told her dad. She knew after that first couple of years, she should’ve kept it all to herself. Her mother didn’t care. She couldn’t stay sober long enough to care about anything besides booze and the only things her dad cared about were his son and what others thought of the family. “Outward appearances. We have to look good for everyone.” That’s what he used to say.
When she finally did get the guts to tell him, his reaction was nothing less than she’d expected.
“You’ve got to be kidding me. Danny? Raped you? And when did this happen?” He laughed at her. “Come on Gabby. This is just a cry for attention and you know it. Another example of you being difficult. Danny would never do anything like that. He’s like a member of this family. He and your brother are more like brothers than cousins they’re so close. Quit trying to blame things on him. Just because you don’t have any friends at school, don’t point fingers at Danny.”
“But Dad, he hurt me. He really did. And he’s still doing it. I swear he is.” Her face was soaked with tears as she begged her father to believe her.
“You’ve become quite the actress, young lady. I think you need to quit reading all those books and start spending more time facing reality. Now stop with this charade. I won’t have it.” He slammed his hand on his desk and she flinched, afraid he was going to hit her, like Danny had. “Now get out of here before I do something we both regret.”
Gabby stared at the ceiling, remembering how she ran to her room crying that night. She remembered how she would try to convince herself that she hadn’t been difficult, that she’d been a good girl and that Danny had truly hurt her. And he was still hurting her. He had stolen so much of her life, and no one believed her. Eventually, she’d stopped telling anyone about him … she’d stopped even trying. And that piece of shit accomplished what he’d wanted, what he’d set out to do. He’d ruined her and she’d kept his filthy secret. Even though she never wanted to. And because of him, that smart, beautiful, kind, young girl lost everything. She grew into a woman with a cracked heart and a damaged spirit, with no one to protect her.
At 5 a.m., Gabby went down to the laundry to start her wash. There was a large part of her that realized she should probably talk to a colleague about what was going on. But she pushed it back in her head because she knew if she did, she would feel so much shame and humiliation that she could never look him or her in the eye again. So once again, she kept her ugly secrets to herself.
Two hours later, she lugged her laundry back upstairs and got ready for work. It was going to be another grueling day, and tonight she had an NA meeting she’d promised her friend Case, a group leader, she would attend. The volunteer hours she logged in were one of the most important things she did. She truly loved helping the people who didn’t have anyone to rely on.
Today her schedule was packed, so she would be brown-bagging lunch. She crammed it into her briefcase and headed to the train.
On the
trip to the office, she didn’t know where to look. Her eyes darted everywhere, not seeing anything because she was so jittery. Heart thudding, palms sweaty, she made the walk to the subway, but nearly freaked out when she got down there. It was dark and dreary and the noise that usually didn’t bother her, made her super edgy. When she boarded her train, she felt claustrophobic with all the passengers squished in beside her. Thankfully, she didn’t have many stops before her station. It seemed like everywhere she looked, she saw Danny’s face. But upon closer inspection, she’d realize she’d been mistaken. She finally stared at the floor and concentrated on her feet.
When she got to her stop, it was all she could do not to push people out of the way. She hit the steps at a run and practically jogged to her office. Her hands shook so badly, she couldn’t find her keys to unlock the door. Frustration mounted, and she almost screamed.
“Miss, may I help you?”
She jumped at the intrusion.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you. I saw you were having difficulty, so I thought to assist you.”
She looked up at over six feet of burly muscle. Soft brown eyes stared back at her as recognition hit her and she instantly relaxed. “You’re the guy who drove me home yesterday, aren’t you? Sam isn’t it?”
“Yes, ma’am. May I?”
“Please. I’m such a mess.”
Sam nodded. He looked into her purse and spied the keys immediately. Pulling them out, he unlocked the door, handed the keys back to her, and retrieved her briefcase.
“Thank you.” She sighed as she rubbed her forehead. “Hey, why you were here?”
He smiled but didn’t answer.
“Are you following me?”
“Not following, ma’am.”
She looked at him with furrowed brows.
“Let’s just say I’m keeping you safe. Have a nice day.” And he walked away.
Gabby walked inside and shut the door behind her. She hoped Sam would be hanging around outside her office. She would feel a lot better knowing he was there. She got up and looked out the window but didn’t see him.
The Hart Brothers Series Box Set (Including the bonus book Sabin: A Seven Novel): Freeing Her, Freeing Him, Kestrel, The Fall and Rise of Kade Hart, Sabin: A Seven Novel Page 4