by Hannah West
"One of the patrol officers is on their way to take position by Julia's door," Riley said, checking his phone messages. "They'll rotate every eight hours. We'll keep you posted on changes in the case, as her doctor and as a courtesy." He glanced sideways at Noelle. "I'll be downstairs." Folding the case file and standing, Riley made his way out the door before Noelle realized what was going on.
"So we meet again," Sara said, sounding amused.
Noelle smiled faintly. "I bet the coffee here isn't as good as it was at the shop."
Sara chuckled. "No, it's not." She clasped her hands and rested her chin atop them. "How are you doing?"
Noelle hesitated, then shrugged. "Could be worse. It's nice to be back, though." She crossed her arms, leaned back in her chair. "How about you?"
"I've dealt with worse, unfortunately," Sara said. "My critical care fellowship was in Detroit at their trauma center. Although we don't often get the parents dying, just the kids." She let out a short, humourless laugh. "Julia's too young to understand, really. I don't know what this will do to her recovery, either." Sara shook her head. "I need to talk to her nurse."
"Keep the news of their death quiet, if you can?" Noelle tapped her fingers on her arm. "If the culprit happens to be here, we don't want them finding out that we're potentially onto them. We don't want to risk them making a move on Julia, even with protection on her."
"Will do." Sara smiled at her, and it was a genuine smile, one that lit up her eyes and made Noelle's insides feel warm. "Take care of yourself. Call if you need a break. Maybe our breaks will overlap." She winked. "I've got a hankering for some good coffee. The stuff here is crap."
Noelle grinned, standing as Sara did. "It can't be much worse than the swill back at the department," she replied. "Tastes like flavored water."
"At least it tastes flavored," Sara drawled. She walked Noelle to the door, pushing it open and leading the way to the elevator. "Detective Hanson seems nice," she said.
"He's a good sort," Noelle agreed. "He took me under his wing when I started and we've been partners the last couple years."
"Good." Sara nodded, stopping in front of the elevators. "Have a good evening." She extended her hand for a handshake.
Noelle stared at her hand for a moment - who said good-bye with a handshake anymore? - and then took it, shaking Sara's hand warmly. "See you soon," she promised.
Sara simply smiled and turned around, walking towards the nurses station. Noelle pressed the elevator button and heard it whir to life. At the very least she would see Sara at the Loss Meeting later in the week. She was looking forward to that. Not the discussion, but the excuse to see Sara. The thought bothered her at the same time it made her giddy. Sara was lovely - she was smart and funny and brilliant and as horrible as the circumstances were, Noelle was glad to have another excuse to talk to her.
The elevator door opened to reveal Riley standing there. "Been riding up and down?" Noelle asked him, her eyebrows raised.
"It's surprisingly stress-free," Riley remarked off-handedly. "You should try it."
Noelle pressed the button for the first floor. "I don't think so."
"You're missing out."
"I'll take that into account." She shook her head, amused, and they rode the rest of the way down in silence. "So what's going to happen to Julia?" Noelle asked quietly as they headed for the black-and-white police car.
"The aunt will be here tomorrow," Riley said, checking behind them before he backed out of their parking space. "She'll take custody, legal guardianship. Unless she gives up her legal guardianship, and signs away her rights."
"Do most people do that?" Noelle glanced out the window, watching the buildings go by.
"Some do." Riley's tone made it clear what he thought of those people. "In some places, family isn't as important as it's made to be in other places."
"You and Elsy don't have kids?" Noelle drummed her fingers on her thighs, thoughtful.
Riley was silent for a few moments. Noelle regretted asking the question. "Not for lack of trying," he said finally.
"Sorry," Noelle said awkwardly, glancing at Riley before looking back out the window. The rest of the car trip passed in awkward silence. It was the first time that Noelle had gotten anything other than a congenial response from him. It had been a sore spot, then. "I hope Julia gets a good home," she said absently.
"I'm less sure about the aunt," Riley admitted. "She didn't seem excited at the prospect of being a parent."
“She has a lot on her plate.” Even saying such, Noelle didn’t feel confident. She watched as Riley smoothly slid into his parking spot at the department.
"Are you going to visit her?" Riley asked suddenly, startling her.
"Who?" Noelle blinked.
"Julia," Riley said, amused. "Or the lovely Doctor. You seem to rather like her."
"I don't," Noelle said immediately. She didn't. Well, she did. As a friend. Sara was her friend. Nothing more. Right? "I'll probably visit Julia," Noelle admitted. "Make sure that someone is checking up on her."
"Plus we need to interview her, once she's awake." Riley pushed open the door and they stepped out. "I'll consult, and you'll take the lead on that one."
Noelle raised her eyebrows. "You don’t want the helm?”
"I don’t feel like the publicity." Riley smiled cheerfully at her. "Better be ready, Detective Richards."
Noelle scowled at him before they headed into the police department.
The second Loss Meeting was more tolerable. Noelle saw Sara sitting quietly in her corner, texting away on her phone, and immediately walked over to her. "Hello," Noelle said, smiling.
Sara looked up to see her. "Hello," she replied evenly. "How are you?"
"Good, thanks." Noelle took the seat next to Sara, scooting it a tiny bit closer. "How are you?"
Sara stifled a yawn. "Good. Work tonight, so I woke up a few hours ago."
"Not a day person?" Noelle crossed one leg over the other, smoothing out her jeans as if they were the slacks she normally wore to work.
Sara chuckled. "Sometimes. Bit of a chameleon, that way." She smiled at Noelle. "Do you want to grab coffee, after the meeting? We could grab coffee from the shop - it's not far from where I work. You could drop by and see Julia."
Noelle was tempted. The coffee was excellent, plus Sara's company was nothing to scoff at. "Is Julia awake?"
"On and off." Sara's voice was mild. "Her aunt dropped by this morning to check on her, then left."
"She's by herself?" Noelle couldn't keep the hint of anger from her voice.
"Beyond the guard outside her door and the nurse going in and out, yes, she is." Sara silenced her phone and tucked it in her purse, crossing her legs to mimic Noelle's pose.
"Yes, I'd love to get coffee." Noelle nodded emphatically. Sara smiled, the warm, fluttery smile that made Noelle's insides turn to mush and her cheeks heat up. It wasn't right, it wasn't proper, and Noelle turned away, doing her best to tone it down.
"Excellent," Sara said softly, turning to look at Michaela as she started the meeting.
Noelle didn't pay as much attention to the meeting as she should have. She introduced herself, recognized a few familiar faces, and then got lost in her own thoughts, aware of the discussion and dialogue only in the most peripheral sense. Instead she was watching Sara, watching her movements, her facial expressions. How the corners of her lips twitched when she disagreed, how her eyes were constantly moving and aware of everything around her. How gorgeous she was, no matter what she was doing.
The conversation with Loryn kept playing in her mind, how it was okay to date someone else. She didn't have to be alone forever. It was difficult to reconcile that with the idea of dating someone other than her soulmate - maybe even marrying them. It didn't feel right. It felt like a betrayal, like something that could never be atoned for. It was ridiculous, and Noelle knew it, but still, she hesitated. Besides, where would she find someone to date?
Oh God. Was she really th
at dumb?
"Ready to go?" Sara asked, her soft voice cutting into Noelle's thoughts.
Noelle blinked at her for a second, momentarily startled. "Yes, of course." She stood, grabbing her purse and ensuring that she had everything she came with. "Ready to go get some good coffee for once?" she asked, teasing.
Sara chuckled. "Not that it makes up for the swill I suffer on a daily basis, but it's a start," she drawled.
"Maybe I'll drop by with some good coffee sometime," Noelle said, sounding braver then she felt. She couldn't turn to look at Sara, couldn't do anything but start the walk out of the room. Oh god, oh god, she thought, regretting it immediately. It had been far too brazen, far too forward.
"I'd like that," Sara said. Noelle could hear her smile, even before she turned to look at her. "You can text me, you know," she added. "I don't bite. I'm generally good at replying to texts."
Noelle had no answer as to why she hadn't been texting Sara in the first place. "Oh," she said instead, wanting to hide in a corner with how articulate she was being. "Thanks." She tried to smile, resisting the urge to bang her head against the wall.
Sara placed her hand on Noelle's shoulder, squeezing it. "It's okay," she said softly. "It's okay. Let's get some coffee."
"Good coffee," Noelle clarified, relaxing a bit at Sara's touch. It made her skin tingle, but in a nice way. She smiled at Sara and led the rest of the way out of the building.
Sara ordered for both of them this time, accurately remembering Noelle's coffee order from their previous get-together. She passed Noelle her coffee, smiling. "One last good cup of coffee before work for both of us?"
"Sounds good to me," Noelle replied, taking the cup and tapping it gently against Sara's. She sipped the coffee, sighing happily at the taste. The caramel gave it just the right amount of sweetness and the iced drink was nice in the heat of the sun. They stood near the door in awkward silence. Noelle glanced at the chairs - did they want to sit down? Should she sit down? Or did Sara have other plans?
"I thought we could head back to the hospital," Sara said, sipping her coffee. "It's about four blocks from here. Your car is fine in the DCFS parking lot for a few hours. Worst case I drive you back."
Noelle paused. Now? Sara wanted to go with her now? And now that she thought about it, Sara’s hospital was only a few blocks from the building. She just had never connected the dots. "Sure." She nodded, heading out the door before Sara could see the nerves on her face. What if she said the wrong thing? What if she did the wrong thing? She couldn't help but think she sounded like a giddy teenager from a romance novel she had read years ago. Ridiculous.
"This way," Sara said when Noelle headed in the wrong direction. Blushing, Noelle turned and caught up, quickly falling into step side by side with Sara. "Those meetings aren't easy, are they?" Sara said quietly, glancing around as they walked.
"The second one was easier," Noelle admitted. She felt an easy sort of camaraderie with Sara, relaxed, like she could speak her mind without fear of getting judged. "I'm happy to be back at work, though."
Sara grinned. "Work helps, doesn't it?"
"It gives you something bigger to focus on." Noelle took a drink of her coffee, smiling in Sara's direction. "So how long have you been working here?"
"Two years," Sara said without thinking about it. "Since the end of my fellowship."
Noelle did the math in her head. "How old are you?" she asked, startled.
"Thirty one," Sara answered promptly. "Young, I know, but I graduated undergrad in three years."
"August birthday?" Noelle could see the hospital now. It was a difficult building to miss. Taller than those surrounding it, it was shiny in a way that most buildings weren't. Sara headed towards the main entrance, Noelle tagging behind her.
"That's correct," Sara said with a smile. "Was one of the youngest in my class."
"I'm July," Noelle said as they stepped through the entranceway into the hospital. Sara nodded at the receptionist and led the way to the elevators.
"How old are you?" Sara asked, curious. She pressed the button for the fourth floor.
"Twenty nine," Noelle mumbled, feeling young. "I took an extra year in undergrad to do a triple major. Psychology, Criminal Justice, and Philosophy."
"Why philosophy?" Sara inquired as they stepped into the elevator.
"I like the theory behind it," Noelle explained with a shrug. "The debates involved are interesting."
"Psychology and Criminal Justice led you to detective work?" Sara tilted her head, watching Noelle out of the side of her eyes.
"Basically," Noelle said. "A friend of mine was the victim of a homicide my senior year of high school, and because I was the last one to see her, I had to work with the detectives to give my statement. In spite of everything going on, I found it really interesting and looked into it as a job."
"Is that how you ended up in homicide?" The elevator jolted as it settled, and Sara shifted slightly. Noelle swallowed as Sara's hand brushed hers. Was that intentional? She wasn't sure. With Sara, Noelle felt like it could have been either way.
"Yup." Noelle smiled faintly. “Been here six years now. Worked my way up.”
"Six years and look at where that's gotten you," Sara said softly, her eyes warm. She turned to look over at the nurse's station, catching sight of the guard by Julia's door. "Know him?"
Noelle followed Sara's gaze. "I've seen him," she said, "but I don't remember his name. Nick, maybe?" There were so many officers that she couldn't remember all of their names. She knew the seniors in the department, had memorized their ranks and orders and gotten to know them at least a little bit. However, she had had less success with the rest of the department.
"He's nice," Sara said, moving forward towards Julia's room. "Ready?" she asked, turning back to look at Noelle.
Noelle felt a slight flash of jealousy when Sara moved towards the police officer. She brushed it aside. Ridiculous, she reminded herself. She wasn't jealous. Or maybe she was. Even if she was, it wasn't right. She had no claim to Sara, Sara wasn't hers. "Yes," Noelle hastened to say, ignoring the ridiculous thoughts going through her mind.
"I've got about an hour," Sara said, glancing at a clock. "That should be enough time." With a smile she led the way through the door and into Julia's room.
Julia was asleep when Noelle came inside. The four year old was tiny, fragile-looking against the expanse of white linen. Noelle glanced back at Sara, looking for guidance. The doctor was looking at the machines, taking in their input and analyzing them. "She's stable," Sara said when she saw Noelle looking at her. "The antibiotics seem to be doing a good job at beating back the infection. The pressors are holding her blood pressure stable, and we have her on medicine to keep the rest of her stable, too." Sara smiled. "Soon we'll be able to start weaning her off." She pulled up a chair next to the bed, pointing to the one on the other side. "You can sit there."
Noelle glanced around the room before she took a seat. It was a small room, but obviously built for families. There was a long bench-like bed at the far wall, underneath the expansive window. There were chairs by the bed, presumably so parents could sit with their children. There was a small fridge and a few cupboards, and a door that Noelle was fairly certain led to a bathroom. "She has no one here," she said, her voice sadder than she had intended.
"She has us," Sara said simply. Noelle looked at her, startled. "As a physician, I am in invested in her welfare. You're on her case, and therefore, also interested in the outcome of her case." She shrugged. "Regardless of the outcome of her aunt, she'll be okay."
Noelle smiled slightly. She felt a kinship with Sara, a bond between them that she hadn't thought was there. No matter what happened between them, no matter what else happened, Julia had at least two people looking out for her best interests. "That's true enough," she said, looking at the small child on the bed. Julia was a tiny thing, pale-skinned from her hospitalization. She had light brown hair that framed her face in a tiny bob, delicate, do
ll-like features, and - Noelle was tickled to see - she was dressed in a plain hospital gown but bright neon pink socks.
"Her Moms liked to wear various socks," Sara explained, catching sight of Noelle's expression. "They left a stash, and the nurses have been changing them each day."
There was a knock on the door before it opened and a sandy-blonde head poked in. "Hello?" she asked, clearly startled to see other people in the room.
"It's me, Ariel," Sara said. "And one of the police officers on her case." Ariel came forward, a stethoscope on her neck and the scrubs she was wearing leading Noelle to guess that she was a nurse.
"I'm Detective Noelle Richards," Noelle said, extending her hand for Ariel to shake.
"I'm Julia's primary day nurse," Ariel said. "Ariel Bren."
"Nice to meet you." Noelle smiled. Sara stood and moved to Noelle's side, leaving room for Ariel to do her job.
"Just doing hourly vitals and changing meds," Ariel said, waving the IV bags in her hand. "Otherwise she doesn't need a lot of care right now."
"I'll change her if it's needed, until I start my shift at nine," Sara said, standing less than a foot away from Noelle's chair. Noelle watched Sara, who was watching Ariel. She seemed so in charge and aware of everything that was going on. Both watched as Ariel spiked new IV bags, readying them to replace the ones that were currently dripping much-needed medicine into Julia's veins.
"I'll hold you to that," Ariel said cheerfully. She leaned down, peering at the young patient. "Hello, sweetie," she murmured, checking the feedback on the monitors. "She should wake up soon," she told Sara, finishing up the IV bags. Julia whimpered next to her, thrashing in her sleep. "Poor love," Ariel said, dialing up one of the meds. "There, that should take care of that."
"Little bit of anxiety?" Sara asked, peering closer at Julia. She put her hand on the arm of Noelle's chair, steadying herself.
"I think so," Ariel replied. "I titered her relevant meds up by a milligram per kg per hour, as per the order."