Ecstasy

by Jacquelyn Frank

  Trace didn’t want to feel the surge of hope rushing through him if it was unfounded. He was worn out, thrashed by all the abuse his emotions had taken since the day Baylor had attacked him.

  Since the day he had met his Ashla.

  “Forgive me, but I don’t see how. A Demon healer cannot heal a Shadowdweller. Not that I know of.”

  “Not that I know of, either. However, as I am understanding this, your woman is not entirely Shadow.”

  Not entirely Shadow.

  Half-breed!

  “You can heal humans!” Trace exclaimed, sitting up suddenly and gathering Ashla up tight in his hold. Dared he hope for this?

  “I can heal her human half. Perhaps that will be enough to let her Shadow half come the rest of the way.” Gideon walked across the room to Trace and Ashla. “I was skeptical when Tristan suggested it. Our bodies do not work in absolute halves. She does not have half-Shadow blood cells and half-human blood cells circulating through her. She is a fusion of both, of course. However, now that I see her, it is plain her human genetics are dominant. In theory, this will be critical to saving her. That and the fact that I am unlike any other healer.”

  “Please.”

  It was all Trace could think of to say. He held Ashla forward to this would-be savior, ready to settle to his knees if he had to in order to make this happen.

  “Lay her on the bed and either step away or move to the other side. I also ask you to please be aware that a healer touches to focus power, and I will need to do this.”

  “I know,” Trace said quickly as he obeyed the command to lay Ashla out and then hurried to the opposite side of the bed. “Ashla is a healer. She touches as much skin as possible to do it. May I hold her hand?”

  “Of course. It will not disrupt me.” The Ancient Demon reached down to draw a fingertip over Ashla’s forehead. “A healer is strange for your breed, is it not? Or am I mistaken? There is much we are ignorant about with one another.”

  “Something that we will one day change,” Tristan promised.

  “Soon, I hope,” Gideon remarked.

  Tristan did not respond. He could make no promises when the future was so uncertain beneath his feet. Whatever was happening in their world, it would take time to discover it and then repair its damage. Until then, their truce with the other Nightwalkers would have to hold its own. For the time, however, they had eradicated the most immediate threat. From this point, they could work their way backward through any veins of destructive disease that remained.

  Gideon turned his knuckles against the cold dampness of the girl’s face. He closed his eyes and sought to sink inside her ravaged systems. Unlike Ashla, when he healed, he was not affected other than by the power he used. This backlash that she suffered, he considered, might be a flaw of her cross-heritage. While the Druids who had blended with human DNA and created hybrids had made intensely powerful descendents, it seemed that first-generation hybrids between humans and Shadows were not so fortunate. At least not in this instance.

  As he searched through Ashla’s system, he was surrounded by the black specificity of the poison within her. It was attached to her ’Dweller DNA like an engineered virus. This could be a tragic obstacle in his healing. He could heal and strengthen that which was human within her, but what would that matter when her Shadowdweller half was the part of her under attack? But again, it was the fusion of the two that might make the difference. That and the curiosity of her own healing power. Perhaps he could fortify this anomalous gift.

  He reached down and closed his hand around her throat gently, focusing his power into a beam of searching light within her, seeking her strengths and her healing aspect. He called it to him, coaxing it from its desperate work of trying to win a losing battle. She had burned all her energy taking in the poison, sparing nothing for herself. A typical human trait, to do something in this all-or-nothing manner. Had she used half her ability and saved the other half to heal herself, then she might have been better off. Still, it was a brave thing for her to do.

  Foolish, but brave.

  Trace was forced to sit by and watch, with nothing but prayers and love in his arsenal to help her return to him. To lay faith at the feet of this Demon stranger was almost as insane as the rest of his existence had become. But within the space of a minute, he watched Ashla take the first full and deep breath of hours.

  “Blessed, beautiful Darkness,” he uttered in his choked relief.

  “Just a step,” the Demon warned him. “Only a step in a long journey.”

  Ashla opened her eyes in a slow, sticky flutter of lashes. Grit scraped her eyelids and she opened her mouth to take in air. Her tongue felt like it was wrapped in cotton, and her jaw ached at its hinges. She was raging with thirst as she focused on the men ringing her bed.

  “I could use a Coke,” she said thickly.

  “Last I checked, we don’t have a McDonald’s down here,” Tristan remarked with amusement.

  “I imagine the neon and fluorescents would have something to do with that,” a stranger with shining silver hair returned.

  “Trace.” Ashla turned to where he was in bed beside her.

  “Yes, love?” he asked, his voice a rush of taut emotion and relief, his eyes shining with nearly shed tears.

  “I’m not naked, am I?” she asked in a whisper.

  “No, love.” He chuckled. “I wouldn’t allow that.”

  “Good,” she sighed with relief. “So I guess I’m going to live,” she theorized.

  “Not for much longer unless you learn reserve and measure in use of your power, youngling,” the silver-haired man said with stern authority. “You need someone to teach you both. Plus, I believe you can do much more with your gifts one day if you can manage to keep yourself healthy. I also do not recommend any more such risks as this last one until after your child is born. Luckily, she is part human herself and I was able to strengthen her. I do confess, though, that she was well protected by your womb in the first place. A surprise, considering how undernourished you are.”

  Ashla blinked and turned to look at Trace. Trace was gaping at the other man in absolute shock, so that pretty much confirmed for her that she hadn’t heard that last part wrong.

  “Uh…Trace…?” she asked uneasily. “Just, um, how accurate is this guy?”

  “I-I have no idea.” Trace rose fully to his feet, meeting the Ancient healer’s eyes dead-on. The blasé lift of one silvered eyebrow told him in an instant that this was a man who was never wrong about anything, and that if he suggested otherwise, he might end up paying for it. “But…there’s this method we use to prevent this from happening,” he tried to explain, the numbness filtering into his body making speech awkward and slow. “Our males take oral contraceptives. I take them, I mean. I always protect my partner. To do otherwise would be…”

  “Dishonorable,” Ashla chimed in for him, pausing long enough to give the only other non-’Dweller in the room a significant eye-roll. She was surprised when the austere man actually smiled. “Do me a favor,” she said as she tried to make her weary body sit upright, “say something before he sticks his foot down his throat or I stick mine up his butt.”

  “Ashla!” Trace was aghast she would speak to a visiting dignitary in such a way.

  “What?” she shot back.

  “I realize how you might be surprised by this pregnancy,” the Ancient speculated, “if what you say is true. I would have to know more about this contraceptive to explain the anomaly with any certainty. However, I assure you she is indeed harboring a fetus, and that fetus is three-quarters genetic Shadowdweller. All I can say is, I hope the one-quarter part that is human does not include her mouth.”

  “Hey!”

  Trace exploded in a shocked laugh even as Ashla scowled at the blatant insult. He supposed he ought to have taken just as much insult on her behalf, but frankly he was a little too overwhelmed after the day he had had. All he knew now was that she was clearly going to be all right. She was alive.

>   And gestating.

  “Burning Light,” he choked out suddenly. “My father is going to kill me.”

  “Oh, brother. I’m tired and I’m going to sleep,” Ashla announced, scooting back down in bed and getting comfortable. “Someone wake me after this episode of Shotgun Wedding is over.”

  “Ashla, this is serious! We must be joined as soon as possible!”

  Ashla wasn’t sure, seeing as how she was feeling really crappy at the moment, but that had to be the worst and most unromantic marriage proposal on earth. His only saving grace was that she had realized the depths of his emotions for her before this news had sent him spiraling into his cultural heart attack over her unwed and knocked-up state.

  “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just at least let me sleep a few hours first,” she said, closing her eyes and trying not to smile. She figured a sucky proposal deserved an equally lackadaisical acceptance.

  “Gideon,” Tristan said, clearing his throat. “I am sure Ashla and Trace mean to thank you for your help.”

  “Yeah, thanks, Gideon,” Ashla acknowledged with a wave before closing her eyes again. “We’ll have to name the kid after you.”

  “It’s a girl,” Gideon reminded her dryly.

  “Oh. Well, next time, then.”

  “We should go,” Tristan said with a sigh as he reached to guide the medic to the door. “This only promises to get worse.”

  “Did you or did you not describe her to me as a ‘shy, mouselike girl afraid to even say hello’?” Gideon was asking as Tristan took him away.

  “Must be the poison,” he said with a shrug before beginning to close the door.

  “I am actually more apt to suspect New York state,” she heard him reply.

  The door shut with a click and left Ashla and Trace alone in the silent room. Then she heard Trace move, clamping his hand on her shoulder and rolling her hard onto her back as he swung a leg over her, astride her as he leaned down nose to nose with her.

  “You were all but dead in my arms,” he informed her hotly. “Every suffering breath you drew, I suffered as well. I thought I would never speak with you again! I thought I had sent you to your death in order to spare my father’s life!”

  “Trace, your father is the backbone of the religion your people need for strength and guidance. He runs the institution responsible for all of the education in this city! I knew all of that when I offered to heal him. You didn’t ask and you didn’t beg. You didn’t force me, either. I would have forced you to let me!” She took a breath. “Did it work? Tell me it worked, please.”

  “Yes,” he breathed, his hands curving around her precious face with exquisite care. “He is resting. And so must you. Ashla…jei li, you are with my child.”

  “I know. I wonder how that happened,” she said, her eyes flashing with wicked amusement.

  “It had to be in Shadowscape,” he realized. “But I don’t see how…when your body was not completely present.”

  “It was present enough, I guess,” she returned, reaching up to touch his mouth, rubbing away his consternation.

  “Drenna, can you imagine if Magnus had not sought you out? You would have been pregnant in both ’scapes…with no explanation for it in Realscape. Your mother and the hospital, they probably would have…”

  He swallowed loud and hard, unable to put words to the understanding. His sensitivity touched her heart. “It’s okay, Trace,” she soothed him softly. “I am here now. Safe and sound in your protection.”

  “Some protection,” he sighed as he gathered her up and rolled her to him. “I tucked you into the nest where vipers lay waiting. I knew it, too. I came to watch over you, but I should have brought you to be with me here at the palace. I just…I didn’t want to overwhelm you or pressure you. I wanted to give you the opportunity to heal and choose fairly.”

  “I see. I totally got that feeling when you demanded I marry you for the sake of your honor just now.”

  Trace saw no irony in that whatsoever, of course. “It is the right thing to do. The only thing. If I speak to Tristan, this could perhaps remain quiet between us. My father wouldn’t have to know, per se.”

  “Babe?”

  “Yes?”

  “He’ll know,” she reminded him.

  Trace sighed heavily.

  “I know. You’re right. And I’m sure it seems pretty foolish to you.”

  “Actually, once you stop panicking, I think you’re probably going to be pretty sweet about it.” She paused to nervously tug at his shirt a moment. “I am, of course, scared shitless.”

  Trace smiled at that, sympathy in his eyes. He knew exactly how she felt. “Me, too,” he admitted. “For many reasons. This combination of DNA has no guarantees to it, and that worries me. I have never entertained fatherhood before. Aiya, until a few weeks ago I wasn’t even entertaining the idea of a woman.”

  “Given the choice, you wouldn’t be doing this,” she noted softly.

  “With threat and treachery all around us? No. Absolutely not. But there is no choice, and that’s okay. We will make this work.”

  “There’s always a choice,” she reminded him. “I could go back. To the human world, I mean. Trustworthy hospitals there, too, by the way.” She had already gleaned his feelings on other choices, so she didn’t voice them.

  “Full of light and sunlight! You would birth my child into that hell?” He was aghast, and when he put it that way, so was she.

  “No. I’m sorry. I wasn’t…I just don’t want to force you into anyth—”

  “Force?” He grasped her chin and met her eyes. “I am never forced to do anything,” he said roughly. She remembered his history and winced at her word choice. “Gestating or not, I would have you, Ashla, be assured of that. You have crawled into my heart and my soul, picking off parts of me day by day and making them your own. Your heart, your goodness, your sheer generosity—they are all I could desire in a woman and more. Your passion,” he continued, the change coming over him on the single word both obvious and alluring, “leaves me breathless, and mine for you simply can’t be measured. What, in any of this, do you read as being forced? Unless…”

  It finally occurred to him that she might not want to be with him. She could tell by the absolute fear and panic that flew through his eyes. Ashla would have loved to mess with him just a little bit, but she didn’t have the heart to torment him.

  “Yeah, okay, but can I please have a drink of water first? I’m dying of thirst here.”

  Relief warred with amusement in his expression, and she smiled at that. She didn’t want to see him endure any more pain. He had been through more than enough. He got up, fetched her cold water twice before she slowed down to breathe, and then helped her into the bath when she begged him to. He lowered her sore little body into hot, soothing water and talked softly to her as he helped to bathe her.

  “I know my ideas seem old-fashioned and silly to you at times,” he said, “but we do things with precision for good reason in this society.”

  “You are a very careful and thoughtful culture, Trace. I can see that, and I can see the good in that. I am hardly complaining.”

  “You should be,” he said with a frown. “I trust no one outside of the upper echelon in the palace. I can’t bear to think of you in childbirth at Sanctuary when it is rotten with creatures like Karri who would do you harm.”

  “Karri!” She thought he was putting her on for a millisecond, but his face told the stark truth. “Karri?”

  He carefully explained the confusion of emotion and deceit as they had best understood it from Karri’s reprehensible mind. He edited some of it, for the sake of his father’s honor, but it made an impact on Ashla just the same.

  “But she was so nice to me. She was always spending time and…”

  Trace looked at her with sympathy as she understood why Karri had no doubt paid extraordinary attention to her.

  “She was a spy,” he said gently, “and she did what spies do. She gathered information from wherever
and whomever she could. As Magnus’s handmaiden, she was set high in the most critical goings-on in Sanctuary and in the palace. He spent as much time here with Malaya as he did there. No doubt, over time, we will discover just how widespread her treachery was. Darkness knows, this could have been going on for years. I am hoping, however, that the recent rush of activity against this household is indicative of it being a shorter time span than that.

  “I am almost certain that whoever was twisting her to his needs is also in Sanctuary. Who else would have access to a handmaiden? It is hard to say, though. I take nothing for granted in this. But now it is up to Magnus to find the truth. You and I are done risking our lives for the time being. I would keep you safe, my pretty love,” he promised her with soft intensity as he nuzzled her cheek with a warm kiss. He dipped the sponge into the heated water, drawing soap and warmth up over her shoulders. “You and my child.” He closed his eyes after he said it, exhaling slowly. “I have to be ready for this. I…I have to be ready.”

  “Luckily, you have nine months to get ready,” she noted. “And please tell me you aren’t going to freak out all of the time like this because, honestly, you’re supposed to be the strong and brave one in this setup. I’m getting a little scared.”

  “I’m the brave one? Jei li, you sell yourself cheaply if you think you are not brave. You have taken on new worlds, new peoples, and self-alterations with an impressive aplomb. I am so proud of my courageous woman who would gamble her life for the sake of others.”

  “I did it for you,” she said, turning to face him with a soft slosh of water in the unusual shell-shaped tub. She reached out to run tender fingers through the crisply short hairs around his ear. “I think I would do anything for you. Especially have this baby, even though it terrifies me.”