by Emmett Swan
Emmett and Clarice Swan
Forest of Lost Secrets
First published by River Path Press 2019
Copyright © 2019 by Emmett and Clarice Swan
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. It is illegal to copy this book, post it to a website, or distribute it by any other means without permission.
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
First edition
ISBN: 978-1-7336403-1-2
Cover art by Edward Bettison
Editing by Cayce Berryman
This book was professionally typeset on Reedsy
Find out more at reedsy.com
Contents
Prologue
I. PART ONE
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
II. PART TWO
Twenty-One
Twenty-Two
Twenty-Three
Twenty-Four
Twenty-Five
Twenty-Six
Twenty-Seven
Twenty-Eight
Twenty-Nine
Thirty
Thirty-One
Thirty-Two
Thirty-Three
Thirty-Four
Thirty-Five
III. PART THREE
Thirty-Six
Thirty-Seven
Thirty-Eight
Thirty-Nine
Forty
Forty-One
Forty-Two
Forty-Three
Forty-Four
Forty-Five
Forty-Six
Forty-Seven
Forty-Eight
Forty-Nine
Fifty
Fifty-One
Prologue
Jessica sat in an unfamiliar boat, shivering despite being wrapped in a large towel. Her mind felt numb. Her vision was blurry from tears and strain. She was considering collapsing—just lying on the bottom of the boat and closing her eyes.
“Hey, Lieutenant, we got something over here,” a strange voice said. As if in a dream, she pulled herself up to her feet and moved to the boat’s gunnels, peering over the edge. She wanted to see him, but the form being hauled from the water was already wrapped in a tarp.
She knew it was Curtis, but there were no more tears. No more anguish. No more words. But that didn’t stop her mind from spinning.
Yesterday, Curtis’s tall frame had filled the doorway of the dressing room in Macy’s department store, arms crossed, admiring her approvingly as she spun around in her new bikini. It was black with pink polka dots. He had jokingly said it made her boobs look bigger.
She wore it now.
The April waters had been reasonably warm, and the skies were clear. It was Saturday. A perfect day for an outing on the lake. She and Curtis had joined her best friends Sylvia and Doug.
A few hours after their day began, Curtis started showing off on his skis, the alcohol making him cocky. Jessica was stationed in the rear of the boat, ready to alert Doug should Curtis wipe out. Sylvia sat beside her. She remembered Curtis urging Doug to speed up so he could go up the side of the wake fast enough to do flips. He had flung his life vest into the boat the last time they came around, saying it was too constricting. Jessica and Doug protested.
She’d heard Curtis’s chiding voice as he bobbed around on the rough lake. “Come on, Jess. Chill. I own these fucking skis today! Doug! Rev it up!”
Doug gave Jessica a quick glance of what she thought was approval. Curtis got up again like a pro and swung from one side of the wake to the other. He was a skilled skier, confidently weaving across the wake. He used the strength of his arms to pull against the boat, making the rope slacken momentarily. He appeared to be floating atop the surface until the boat caught up, snapping the rope taut and yanking him forward.
He was in complete control, so Jessica relaxed. He knew what he was doing. Sylvia flashed him a thumbs-up and a huge smile.
Curtis kept using hand gestures to urge Doug to go faster, then he swung from one side of the wake to the other, testing the speed. He tried this several times, each time urging Doug to go faster and faster still.
On an open stretch of water with no other boats in the way, Doug turned around and yelled at Curtis.
“Okay dude! Hold on to your shorts!”
Doug pushed the throttle handle down as far as it would go. Curtis flashed a thumbs-up, bent his knees deep, and sped up the side of the wake, flying high into the air, twisting twice, and then going a half turn too far.
The memory made Jessica wince. Curtis had wiped out head first, tumbling along the surface of the water before sinking out of sight.
“He’s down, Doug! He’s down hard. Go back! Go back!” she’d cried.
The turnaround seemed to take an hour, and he wasn’t coming up.
“Hurry, hurry! Oh my God, I don’t see him. Where is he? Hurry, go back!” The panic fueled every muscle in her body. Before the boat even came to a stop, she dove off the side where Curtis had gone down. Doug dove in after her.
She swam deep with her eyes open, searching the greenish lake water for a hint of Curtis or his clothing. What color were his swim trunks? Her eyes were burning, her vision blurry. Tears, lake water, panic.
She came up for air, gasping, looking around frantically and screaming his name. She saw Sylvia’s face on the boat. It was distorted with panic and fear. In response to her unvoiced question, Jessica shook her head.
Sylvia began sounding the horn and waving at other boaters. “Help, help us!” she yelled. “Swimmer down! Help! Skier down!”
Go back. Find him.
She dove back down, eyes wide open again, going even deeper this time. Under the water, Sylvia’s cries and the horn were muted. Calm down, Jessica thought. Just find him. This is not happening. You’re gonna find him. He’s still alive. Just look. Find him!
She came up for air then dove back down. She moved a little more each time she went back under. Oh my God, please be okay. Please, God. When she came out of the water again, the noises came crashing back into her ears and brain. It was surreal.
Each time she came up, new boats had arrived, floating nearby with concerned faces looking on. Several strangers had joined in the search. “Do you see anything?” everyone would yell as soon as someone surfaced. “No” was always the response. “No.” Dive again. Muted sounds of boat motors under water. They sounded so small and far away.
She went down as many times as she could. She didn’t remember how many. With each fruitless dive and every passing moment without finding Curtis, the enormity of her loss became apparent. There were so many people now—boats, chaos.
She had no idea how much time had passed, but Jessica remembered floating atop the water on a flotation device someone had thrown to her. It came from an official police boat. Jessica was vaguely aware of the police radios echoing off the water. Her lungs were tight and desperate. She breathed heavily, her head tipped toward the center of the rescue device. She couldn’t raise h
er head. She was too exhausted. The fabric was wet, and she was keenly aware of the sound of lapping water inside it. Her breath was loud, the sound bouncing off the interior of the device.
She remembered the musty, earthy smell of the lake water and wet orange fabric. She had focused on the words printed inside the buoy. “Taylor Made Life Ring Buoy. U.S. Coast Guard approved. Tested and inspected in accordance with USCG regulations to 250 lbs.” She whispered the words, centering her thoughts again, then dove back under one more time.
Someone pulled her from the water at some point. She didn’t remember who. Her legs were trembling so badly, she couldn’t stand in the strange boat. Her lips were numb, her body chilled, her heart shattered.
Later, when they examined Curtis’s body, they discovered his neck had snapped from his impact with the water. Without a life jacket and his stomach full of beer, he had sunk and drowned.
Jessica and Curtis had been dating for four months.
I
Part One
One
Jessica stared out the window of the back seat of the dingy cab as it wound through narrow country byways. Thick rain doused the landscape around her, blurring the scene into vague patches of green and gray. Thunder cracked directly overhead, and the sky unleashed a greater torrent of water, beating the roof of the cab with a raucous patter.
The mottled, messy scene around her was Ireland. It was her first visit to a foreign country, and so far she wasn’t impressed.
Upon leaving the airport, the cab had driven through industrial areas surrounding bland residential enclaves that seemed similar to home. True, the houses were smaller and quainter than what she was used to, but they really weren’t that different.
And then the gray rain began, and everything seemed downright dismal, mirroring her state of mind.
She hadn’t wanted to go on this trip, but her parents had virtually forced her. And now, she sat in the back seat of a cab with her little brother, Riley, heading into the Irish countryside.
Jessica sighed and slowly shook her head. She had made big plans for the summer. She started college in the fall and there was so much to do—shopping, a hefty reading list, and saying goodbye to all her friends. And on top of that, she had planned on continuing to work as a fundraiser for the Kentucky chapter of Against Drunk Boating, an organization she had worked with the previous summer.
She was good at collecting money for the cause. Ever since Curtis died, more than a year ago, she had been motivated. The tragic event was etched on her brain and she thought about it often.
She couldn’t help thinking back to when she first met him. He was the new kid in town, having moved to Louisville a few weeks before the school year began. They met at school and by January, they were dating. That spring, just four months later, they had gone to Lake Nolin with some friends. Curtis had downed too many beers and was showing off on his skies. A violent tumble broke his neck, and he had sunk and drowned.
She had lost Curtis, but she could not forget him. She was determined to do what she could to prevent similar accidents. A summer job as a fundraiser for Against Drunk Boating was one way she could make a difference. And she felt like she had made a difference, but she wanted to do more.
Staring out the cab window, she absently fingered the gold pendant suspended from a thin gold chain around her neck. She had vowed never to remove it. Never to be without the glimmer of comfort it provided. She thought back to the day Curtis gave it to her. It was her sixteenth birthday, and no boy had ever given her jewelry before. She had not been without it since.
She looked over at her brother, his earbuds in and his gaze directed out at the rain. She knew he was equally unhappy about having to leave Louisville for the summer. His new friend Dylan had gotten him a job at Actor’s Theater working on the scenery for the summer production. It was his first real job, and Jessica knew he was looking forward to hanging out with his new buddy, building props, painting scenery, and creating new settings for upcoming productions. Riley had few friends, but Dylan and this new theater gig seemed so up his alley, and he appeared to really enjoy it. It was too bad he would have to put it all on hold.
Jessica bit her lip and leaned back in her seat. It smelled vaguely of old vinyl and body odor. She tried closing her eyes, but sleep was impossible. Her mind kept spinning.
She knew she should have been excited about spending the summer in Ireland. Her mother was surprised. “Jessica, honestly!” she’d said. “It’s not as if you’ve been exiled to Siberia. It’s Ireland, for goodness sake. Most teenagers would die to go to Europe for the summer!”
True enough. But without even consulting her or Riley, or finding out what their summer plans were, their parents had arranged everything. Cousins Emily and Molly would stay at their Louisville house for the summer while she and Riley would stay in their cousins’ vacated rooms in Ireland. It wasn’t that she didn’t love Aunt Noreen and Uncle Basil. She absolutely did. And she would have been happy to visit them for a week or two. But the whole summer? It seemed to her that her parents just didn’t respect what she wanted. Or what Riley wanted.
Another clap of thunder snapped her out of her thoughts. Staring through the pouring rain, she could see that they had left the main road and were winding down a rustic, tree-lined lane.
Aunt Noreen and Uncle Basil called their home Connaree Manor, and it was way out in the country. Jessica had never visited it before and didn’t know what to expect. Would there be other teenagers around? What about stores or movie theaters? And she didn’t even want to think about the fact that she had no wheels. She had been able to drive her parents’ second car since she got her driver’s permit; everyone she knew drove. But her Irish cousins didn’t drive, and she had heard her dad say many times that European cultures weren’t as dependent on vehicles as most Americans. Would she be walking everywhere? Did they have bikes, at least?
Her biggest concern was her phone signal. For the last half hour, she had no bars. Zip. She hoped it was just the rainstorm causing it, but she worried that she wouldn’t be able to use her phone. She couldn’t imagine spending the summer not being able to keep in touch with her friends, to check her Instagram page, or to follow up on the Against Drunk Boating Facebook page.
Jessica sighed heavily. Just thinking about it made her feel stressed. Oh well. She turned her attention to Riley.
She heard tiny, insect-like sounds coming from his earbuds and realized he was listening to music. She gave him a nudge and he slowly turned around and pulled out his earbuds.
“What?” he asked, scowling at the interruption.
“So how are you getting a signal?” she asked. “I lost mine a while back.”
“I’m not. I have some songs already on my phone.” He looked at his phone. “No bars at all.”
Jessica gazed out the window and squinted through the rain. “Well, what should we expect? We are in the middle of nowhere.”
Riley looked at Jessica with concern. “Aunt Noreen and Uncle Basil better have Wi-Fi.”
Jessica shrugged. “They’re pretty wealthy. I’d be surprised if they didn’t.”
“I mean, we can’t be expected to go the whole summer without our phones.” Riley inserted his buds back into his ears but pulled them out again after a second. “Are we getting close?” he asked.
Jessica reached over the front seat and tapped the driver’s shoulder. “Excuse me, sir. How much farther?”
The cab driver, snaggle-toothed with strands of long gray hair drooping from his cap, smiled at her in the rearview mirror. “Can’t say, lassie. My GPS doesn’t want to play nice out here. Got paper maps, though. We’ll be fine.”
“Approximately, then? Would you say an hour?”
“Nay, miss. Not that long. Looking for a road called Kyne Lane. Once we turn, a couple miles farther and we’re there.”
“Thanks.” She returned to peering out her window, and as she watched she realized the rain was beginning to ease up. In minutes, the heavy d
ownpour transitioned to a light drizzle, only softening the world around her rather than transforming it into a blurry haze. She could see many more details, and she found herself intrigued.
In all directions, the land was filled with green fields dotted with clusters of trees and rocky hills. Dry stone fences abounded, with white dots of sheep scattered about emerald pastures, now impossibly green in the fresh rain. She was used to seeing the same type of stone fences around Kentucky horse country, but the ones here enclosed smaller spaces, often containing farm animals or gardens. Sweeping moors littered with boulders were filled with early summer color.
She lowered her window to let in the wind. A few droplets of water wet her face. The smell of manure wafted in with the breeze, but it wasn’t unpleasant. In fact, she preferred it to the peculiar odor of the aged vinyl in the cab.
And then the rain was gone entirely, and a patch of sunshine broke through the clouds. To her amazement, she spied a newly formed rainbow through the windshield. Again, Jessica nudged Riley, who was fiddling with his inert phone, and pointed. The cab driver gestured toward the rainbow and glanced at them in the back seat. “Nice-looking rainbow for ya, lassie. And maybe a pot of gold at its end.”
“Put there by leprechauns, no doubt,” Jessica chirped.
Riley, who had perked up, moved closer to the back of the driver’s seat to get a better look at the rainbow. A broad smile broke across his face as he admired its vivid colors. Then, for the first time, he looked around him outside the cab. His attention became captured by the green fields, bare hills, and stretches of purple heather. The earbuds fell from his ears, but he didn’t seem to care or notice. “Kinda cool,” he said, putting his nose against his window.
“Smell that country air?” Jessica asked.
Riley rolled down his window and stuck his head out into the wind for a few seconds. When he pulled it back inside the cab his hair was sticking straight up. He smiled at Jessica. “You like my doo?”
“It’s so amazing out here,” she said, ignoring his question and taking in the landscape around her. “Or, as a great poet once said, it toucheth my soul.”