by Ella Miles
Shock.
Even if my body betrayed me on some level when I told the truth instead of the lies, she wouldn’t notice, she was too busy being frazzled by my words—hating herself for getting on a boat with such a vicious man.
“Now what?”
“Now we make our choice. We only get to pick once. One chance to pick the truth.”
“And if neither of us chose correctly?” I ask, even though I doubt it will happen. One of us will choose correctly and one of us won’t. I have no doubt I’ll be the victor.
“Then I guess we don’t get any answers.”
I nod, agreeing.
I think back to the three choices:
I’ve never given a blow job.
I’ve never come.
I’ve never been kissed.
I eye her suspiciously as I think them over and how she said each sentence. The first sentence was easy falling from her lips, meant to shock me as I had her. The second was breathy, like she was thinking about coming when she said it and how good it would feel. The third she said almost playfully, like she was daring me to kiss her.
I smile.
“Have you decided?” she asks.
“I can eliminate one easily.”
“And which one is that?”
“I’ve never come is easily a lie. I felt how you pressed back against my body when I was touching you. You know your body well. You know how it feels to make yourself come. You know that exquisite feeling when you touch your clit and explode.”
Her cheeks blush just a little, but otherwise, she doesn’t show any confirmation that I chose one of the lies correctly.
“And what do you think? Do you think you know any of mine you can eliminate?”
She cocks her head to the side as if she’s hiding something. “You’ve never shot a man. That one’s easily a lie. I saw your gun. I can only assume you’ve used it.”
I swallow hard, and she knows she guessed the lie correctly.
“Now comes the hard part though.”
I nod.
We both eye each other, waiting for either to give away our secrets with a look, a breath, a word. Neither of us does.
I watch her weigh her two options in her head. Either I’ve never raped or never murdered. Neither makes me a saint, both make me a sinner. She knows nothing about me, but I know the hope she has will make her choose I’ve never killed a man, because she views that as the worse crime. She will choose the lesser of the two evils. Wrongly.
I think between my two options.
If I believe she was telling the truth when she says she’s never been kissed, then that means she’s given a man a blow job without having been kissed first. I stare up at the woman in front of me. She’s not that kind of woman. She may be desperate, but she knows her own worth. She wouldn’t sell herself, so she wouldn’t give a blow job for money. And if a boyfriend asked, he would have had to have been chivalrous. Taken her out on date after date to gain her kiss, let alone to earn her to blow him.
“Ready?” she asks.
I nod.
She lifts her drink, and I raise mine. We both down our drinks until the glasses are empty, our eyes never leaving each other.
“Your truth is you’ve never given a blow job,” I say as I gently set the glass on the table, happy to declare my victory. I don’t care if she guesses correctly. I will get my questions answered.
Her lips slowly curl. “Wrong.”
What? She’s given a blow job but never been kissed?
She leans forward on the table. “And your truth is you’ve never raped a woman.”
My eyes glare back at her as she smirks. I don’t have to open my mouth for her to know my truth. She already knows she won.
6
Kai
I won.
I know without Enzo confirming it. I guessed correctly, although it never felt like speculation. I’ve always been good at telling the difference between a lie and the truth. Enzo is harder to read than most, but even he has his tells.
He’s never raped a woman.
It warms me a little to know he never did anything that horrible.
But he has.
He’s shot someone. Killed someone.
I don’t know the circumstances around either. It could have been self-defense. I have no doubt, if I could afford a gun, I would have shot someone by now and killed if my aim was good.
Somehow, I don’t think Enzo has done either only in self-defense.
Enzo glares at me, frustrated I won and he lost. I expect him to argue with me about my truth and lies. I expect him to call me out and claim that surely a sixteen-year-old like me has been kissed, especially if, as I claim, I’ve given a man a blow job. I expect him to whip his dick out and force me to suck it, to prove I’ve given head before.
Instead, he’s a statue, giving me nothing of what is going on inside his body.
“You’re not going to question my truth?”
His head cocks to the side as if he’s trying to figure out what game I’m playing. “No.”
“You sure?”
He nods his head. “Yes, I know you wouldn’t deceive me during the game. I know you’ve masturbated before. And I know you’ve sucked off some man’s dick like a whore.”
I wince at his harsh words.
His eyes meet mine, filled with want. “And I know you’ve never been kissed.”
I bite my now sore lip, that aches to be kissed, but I’m sure is red and swollen from the number of times I’ve chewed it today to keep myself from kissing this boy. This very dangerous, off-limits boy who I shouldn’t be on this yacht with.
Enzo stands up and walks back to the railing, where the sun is now well below the horizon. The sky has opened up, allowing the darkness to begin to overtake the heavens. Soon there will be nothing left but the stars and the moon to shine down upon us.
I consider pouring myself another drink before I approach him, but I’ve had enough alcohol. I need my wits about me around him. He won’t express it, but I can feel the anger radiating off him as I approach. He has considerable control though to not let it show on any of his features.
I stop next to him, ensuring I don’t touch him.
“Ask me.”
His voice is low and rumbling. It’s deepened since he was talking to me earlier. This voice is the one he uses to scare people. It should frighten me. Instead, I want to hear it again.
I know how he expects me to use my newfound power. To ask questions about the game. To ask who he’s shot or killed and why he’s never raped a woman before if he’s done the other two.
“How did you learn to drive a yacht?”
His head turns to me, and I can see his thick, dark eyebrow raise. “I grew up around the water in this business. You were taught to take care of the yachts, while I learned everything else about them. How to drive them, maintain them, sell them. There is nothing I don’t know about how a ship like this works.”
I inhale and then exhale, trying to remind myself to keep breathing. What is he doing to me? They are just words. I shouldn’t be so hot and bothered when he merely speaks. And I’ve let it affect my judgment. I know better than to get on a boat in the middle of fucking nowhere with a strange man. A man who has already admitted to killing someone. But his words are intoxicating, pulling me deeper until I have no brain cells left and will do whatever he wants.
“Who do you work for?”
“Black.”
I stop breathing. Black. His name is synonymous with evil. He’s a myth and a legend. I’m not even sure he’s a real person, but I have no doubt Enzo works for the most dangerous man in the city.
I need to gain back some power, because even though I won, it doesn’t feel like I have any control.
“Have you ever been kissed?” I ask, wiggling my eyebrows trying to break the serious mood.
“Yes, Kai. I’ve been kissed. I’m not wide-eyed and bushy-tailed like you.” He pauses. “And before you ask, yes I’ve had women kneel in
front of me, pleading with me for the pleasure to suck my cock.”
My eyes drop to his dark jeans, and I swear I saw his cock grows against the zipper.
No, it must be my imagination. He can’t be turned on.
Enzo faces me now and takes my hand in his. I watch in horror and excitement as he lifts my hand to his lips and kisses my palm tenderly. It should be innocent enough, but I feel a warm tingle cascade through my body.
“Do you have any other questions, Kai?”
I close my eyes, trying to still my racing heart. “Why did you bring me here?” My words are a whisper, but I know he hears me, despite my eyes being closed.
I feel his hand at my neck, and I gasp, opening my eyes. His body is so close to mine I can feel the electricity in his body. He’s so warm; he burns me when he grazes my skin. But other than his hand at my neck, he doesn’t stroke me, just thumbs my neck, melting a layer of skin from my hard shell. He’s so full of restraint.
I lick my lip, because I can’t stand not to feel something pressed against my lips.
“Kai,” he says, his voice threatening, but I don’t understand why.
“Enzo,” I say his name like a curse.
His eyes tell me what he’s going to do before he does it—giving me one second to stop him.
I don’t stop him.
His lips crash with mine.
I always thought my first kiss would be sweet, gentle. I thought it would be in a first step on the way to falling in love. I thought it might be clumsy or awkward, but the second kiss would more than make up for it.
That’s not what this is.
This kiss in an explosion, setting off a desire neither of us is allowed to feel.
A second after our lips crash, his tongue sweeps into my mouth. My arms wrap around his neck like I’ve done it a thousand times, while his hands grip my waist, almost suffocating me with their grip.
My tongue fights with his. Both of us needing control over the kiss. He demanded my first kiss from me, and I gave it willingly. But now, we need more.
I purr into his mouth as his tongue massages mine and his body presses into me, smoldering me in the process. And I’m cursing the fabric between us, wishing we were in swimsuits or better yet, nothing at all.
We could fuck.
Here. Now.
Enzo might not be who I dreamed of being my first. But he’s better than the alternative. He’s better then selling my first time or having it taken from me, which is what will happen if I stay at the trailer park.
He might not cuddle with me in bed afterward or even talk to me about what happened. He wouldn’t be gentle or concerned with making sure I was adequately prepared before he would take my virginity. But he would take it, and I would give it as willingly as I gave this kiss.
I shouldn’t be thinking about sex. I’m too young, not even seventeen yet, but in my world, I don’t have the luxury of waiting, of remaining innocent.
He bites my lip.
I feel the tingle of the blood in my mouth.
What do you want with me, Enzo?
It should piss me off, but it only turns me on more.
Dammit! What am I doing?
This is precisely what he wants, me thrown off guard. Me, letting down my guard so he can attack. It’s the reason he brought me here. To get something from me.
I might let him fuck me, but I won’t let him take advantage of me.
The kiss will end soon. I can feel it. So I do the only thing I can to gain more information.
I slip my hand into his back pocket and fish out his phone. I know he didn’t notice. I’m an expert at picking pockets when I want to be. I let him catch me with the wallet so I could more easily retrieve the more expensive watch.
The kiss ends.
I don’t know who stops it. It just happens.
Enzo’s eyes stare intently at my swollen lip. His thumb brushes across the sore. I see the blood before his thumb moves to mouth, and he sucks it off.
Neither of us speaks about what just happened. We just stare and pretend that kiss didn’t change everything.
I slip his phone into my back pocket before he realizes it’s missing.
“Bathroom…” I say suddenly needing a moment alone.
I don’t wait for him to nod or tell me where one is. I dash away, through the sliding door where Enzo retrieved our drinks. I don’t care where the bathroom is; I don’t need it. I need to stop letting Enzo affect my body and use my head. I need to realize the danger I put myself in.
I open the nearest door and step inside before shutting it and locking it. I slip the phone out of my pocket and stare at it.
It’s password protected.
Of course, it is.
Shit, what was I thinking?
It buzzes.
I jump, staring at it like it’s just come alive.
The phone may be locked, but the message still shows up on the home screen.
The message is from Black, his boss.
* * *
Black: Is Kai dead yet?
* * *
I blink. Over and over.
I’m not reading that right.
But every time I reread it, it says the same thing.
Eventually, the screen goes dark, and when I hit the home button again the message is gone, only an alert left that he has an unread message.
Dead.
That’s what Enzo is doing here. He was sent to kill me.
The door opens, but I don’t have to turn to know Enzo has a gun pointed at my head.
“Do you have any more questions, thief?”
His words cut through me like glass. I may be a thief, but he’s an assassin.
I turn to him with defiance in my eyes. I always knew something horrible awaited my future. He may think I’ll die quick and swiftly, or I’ll beg for my life.
I’ll do neither because I’ve been prepared for this day. And I won’t go down without a fight.
“Just one.
“Why?”
7
Enzo
Why?
I promised to reply to any of her questions if I lost, but this is the one question I can’t answer.
“Why?” Kai asks again, her voice steady, though I can see the quiver in her lip as she speaks. A lip still swollen and stained red from the drop of blood I drew when I kissed her.
Kai won’t let this go.
I hold the gun loosely in my hand, still pointed in her general direction, but not aimed directly at her. I should pull the trigger and end this. Put a stop to the questions I can’t answer.
“Why?” her voice is stronger now, more determined. “You are going to kill me anyway. It won’t hurt to tell me why if you are just going to shoot me. I won’t be able to tell anyone.”
I don’t react, not even with my eyes. She’s right of course, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to answer her.
Her eyes grow dark and angry. “We made a bet. You played the game. You lost. Now answer me! Why?”
My eyes close for a second longer than they should be closed. I expect her to take her chance and escape. She’s smart, observant, and will do anything to survive, but she doesn’t take her opportunity when I show the tiniest weakness. Her need to know the answer is greater than her need to live in this moment.
I want to answer her.
I want to know why myself.
But I won’t lie to her, and I don’t know the answer.
Her legs tremble, and she falls, the bed behind her catching her into a seated position. Her hand shakes against her chest, and if I were to feel her pulse I know it would be flying through her body, her fight or flight response kicked into gear.
“You don’t know, do you?” Her words are sharp and determined.
“No, I don’t know why.”
“Did you even ask why when you were given this assignment?”
“Yes.”
She nods slowly. “I understand. You’re not high up enough in Black’s crime organization to
get to know why. You blindly follow orders. I knew you were a criminal. I knew you did bad things when I met you. I knew you were dangerous, but I didn’t realize you were heartless and cruel. I didn’t know you were a fucking coward, a nobody, a lowlife who only cared about earning cash when you took a life!”
Her breathing is hurried, but she doesn’t stop. “I thought if you were to kill me, you would at least give me the courtesy of deciding I deserved to die yourself, not because some king in a castle told you to. I thought you were your own person, but now I realize who you really are. A fucking pussy with no control and no future.”
“Are you finished?”
She huffs. “You’re the one with a gun. You tell me.”
I lower it just a little; she exhales realizing I’m not going to shoot her, not yet.
“You’re right. I’m a fucking coward who won’t stand up for myself. I follow orders. But you’re wrong about my ability to control my future. I may not be able to control what I do on this boat, but I will after.”
“How?”
“Because this is my final assignment. After this, I’m free.”
She sucks in a breath, and for the first time, I see real terror in her eyes. She realizes there is nothing she can do to stop me from killing her. That my desire to be free is greater than my desire to save her.
Kai takes a second to compose herself, and then she stands. She walks to me, ignoring the gun in my hand pointed toward her leg.
Her lips pout, and her body sways as she walks toward me.
My pulse races, my jaw twitches, and my cock hardens.
I want her.
There’s no denying it. It’s been a while since I’ve felt a kiss like the one she just gave me. No, I’ve never had a kiss like that one.
It was passionate, mysterious, sweet, and full of promise. Her first kiss was everything a kiss should be. Too bad it will also be her last kiss.
I want Kai.
More than I want to breathe.
More than I want my freedom.
I could have both. Spend the day kissing her, fucking her, using her. Then get the freedom I’m desperate for.