“Liam.” Savannah’s voice was soft as she spoke to their son. “Mama’s okay.” When he didn’t look up, Savannah softly tapped on the table beside him. “Liam, look. I’m okay.” She offered him her biggest smile.
Slowly, Liam began to calm down and he glanced at Savannah. “Why were you upset? Did he upset you?” Liam pointed at Caden.
Savannah shook her head. “No. Mr. Caden was comforting me. Remember, I told you he’s Mommy’s old friend.”
Liam seemed doubtful. “I don’t like it when you’re upset.”
“I know.” Savannah sat beside him cross-legged. “And I promise, we,” she said, glancing up at Caden, “are doing fine. Aren’t we, Caden?”
“That’s right. I care about you and your mom,” Caden said, joining and crouching beside them.
“But you don’t know us.” Liam’s dark eyes connected with Caden’s. In that moment, Caden was faced with the biggest regret of his life. He’d never gotten the chance to know his own son, to be a father to this amazing young boy.
“Well, that’s about to change now that your mom and I have reconnected.”
A frown scrunched Liam’s face and he asked, “Does that mean you’re going to come over to the house a lot? TJ in class told me that his mom’s new friend comes over to their house all the time and sleeps over at night. He doesn’t like it. Will you be doing the same thing?”
Caden chuckled. Earlier this morning, before he’d arrived here, the thought had crossed his mind, but now—now he was too shell-shocked to do anything. He needed to process that he had an eleven-year-old autistic son. But he wasn’t going to throw the baby out with the bath water and lie to his son either. “No, not just yet. Your mom and I need to get to know each other again.”
“Good,” Liam said. Then he rose to his feet. “I’m going to my room now so you can get to know each other.”
Seconds later, he was gone and Caden stared at the doorway his son had exited through.
“I know this has come as a shock,” Savannah said, attempting to stand up. When she stumbled, Caden grasped her around her waist and helped steady her. An electric shock surged through Caden at touching Savannah again. He glanced up to see that her eyes had darkened which told him she’d felt it too.
“That’s putting it mildly.” Caden stood upright. He glanced around the room, suddenly unsure of what to do. His world had been turned on its axis.
The silence continued for several moments until Savannah spoke up and broke the ice. “Liam has had a good life, Caden, filled with love. I adore him. His abuela adores him. Even my mom in her own way does what she can. He’s never wanted for anything. I’ve made sure of it, no matter the cost to me.”
“Except a father.”
He was right.
Savannah had no response to offer in the face of the truth. Although she’d given Liam all she could, she hadn’t been able to give him a father. At one point when he was younger, he used to ask where his father was, especially when kids at school made fun of him, but eventually he stopped asking. Savannah had been grateful, because what could she say? That she’d purposely kept his father from him?
“I don’t know what to say, Caden,” Savannah said, shrugging, “other than you’re right. I kept Liam from you, but I did it out of love.” At his incredulous look, she added, “Or at least that’s what I thought at the time. I was doing what was best for him.”
“Or what was best for you?” Caden said. “I understand my mother tapped into your greatest fears of not being good enough for me. I get that. But you? You didn’t believe in yourself? Or in us, Savi? You let someone else come between us, tear us apart, leaving our son to grow up without a father. And me, never having the chance to know my son, all because you were afraid.” Caden started toward the door.
Those small words sent fear racing up Savannah’s spine. Caden had a powerful family with plenty of influence, and with the determination in his eyes, she had cause for alarm. Would Caden try to take Liam from me?
“Where are you going?” Savannah asked. She had to know what was happening. What was he going to do? She understood there was a communication chasm between them and that what loomed ahead was emotionally charged, but she was also on edge.
“Home. I need to process this.” He reached inside his jeans pocket and pulled out a business card from his wallet. “You have a pen?”
Savannah glanced around and found one on the coffee table and handed it to him. She watched him scribble on the back of the card and hand it to her. “That’s my address and cell. I’ll be in touch.”
She nodded. “Alright.” She walked him to the door and watched him with hunched shoulders head to his car. The enormity of her actions slowly began to dawn on her. She couldn’t recall when she’d ever seen Caden so defeated and at a loss for words. He’d always been the picture of perfection, a hero in her mind who’d slay dragons, but she’d broken him. She wasn’t sure if the pieces would ever be put back together again.
Chapter 8
Caden was gutted. When he asked Jack to find Savannah, he thought they’d clear the air about the past. Maybe he’d even take her to bed and quench the lust that had come bubbling up to the surface since the night of his fundraising event. He hadn’t, however, counted on Savannah delivering such profound news, news that would change his life forever.
He had a son.
An eleven-year-old son whom he knew nothing about other than that he had a condition that Caden had heard about on the news or on commercials. Autism had never impacted his life in any way, shape, or form until now. He would have to learn everything he could and more about it so he could know how to interact with Liam. Today, he’d seen how the slightest difference in his routine could be disruptive and cause Liam great distress.
Caden didn’t want that for his son, but he also felt powerless. Savannah had all the power. She had all the knowledge about how to care for Liam. She also had all the love, all of their son’s life to herself while he’d been left out in the cold. And he was angry. Angry at Savannah. Angry at his mother. Angry at fate for dealing him such a cruel blow.
On the one hand, he’d found Savannah again, only to discover she’d kept such a huge secret from him. He’d gained a son, but Caden also felt he’d just lost something today. He’d lost the belief in other human beings. Savannah had lied to him. His mother had lied to him. Who else knew? Was he the last to know?
Tomorrow, he would find out. But for now, he just wanted to feel sorry for himself and drown in a bottle of bourbon.
Later, that evening, Savannah pulled into the driveway of Caden’s home, her heart pounding. She wasn’t sure this was the wisest course of action, but Caden had looked so devastated, she knew she had to come. Knew she had to make him see why she’d done what she’d done. Although she couldn’t go back in time and rewind the clock, Savannah couldn’t let him think the worst of her. Charlotte once again was a lifesaver and had agreed to come over on short notice. Savannah promised she would tell all upon her return.
She’d been thinking about what Caden had said. He had a point. She’d run away from him out of fear. Fear of his mother. Fear of the future. Fear for herself if Caden would decide to leave her one day. She’d taken the easy way out. It was easier to keep herself closed off and hidden away from the world than be vulnerable. So she’d run. Now, here they were.
Turning off the ignition, Savannah took a deep breath and jumped out of the vehicle. Most of the lights in the house were off, so she wondered if Caden was still there. She had to find out. Girding her loins, she rang the doorbell.
At first the house was silent, but eventually she heard footsteps and the front door swung open. Savannah was surprised by what she saw. Caden’s shirt was hanging unceremoniously out of his jeans, his eyes were bloodshot, and he was barefoot.
“What are you doing here, Savi? You should be home with Liam.”
“I was worried about you,” Savannah said, pushing past him into the foyer. “And with good reason. What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing.” Caden closed the door behind her. “I just needed something to take the edge off.”
Savannah noticed the half-filled glass with dark liquid. “Caden, you were never a big drinker.”
“No, usually not, but I have a cause,” Caden responded and began walking down the hall. Savannah followed him until they arrived at what she assumed was the family room. There was a big comfy leather sectional, massive television, and speaker setup. She could see where Caden had been because a bottle of dark liquid sat on the cocktail table and a throw blanket covered the recliner.
She watched as Caden settled himself back on the sofa. She debated about what to do and in the end sat beside him. “Can I have one of those?”
Caden shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
Savannah rose and moved toward the kitchen directly adjacent to the family room. She glanced at the cupboards and had to go through several until she hit the jackpot and found a matching tumbler. She returned with the glass and set it in front of Caden.
He poured her two fingers and closed the bottle. Then he faced forward where the television was on, but there was no sound.
“What are you watching?”
His glance at her said, “Really?” “Why are you here, Savannah?”
“I told you. I was worried and wanted to check up on you.”
Caden chuckled with false mirth. “You could have called. I gave you my personal cell.”
Savannah swallowed. He had a point, but she wouldn’t have been able to see for herself how he was truly doing. He might have given her a pat answer. “Yeah, I could have, but I didn’t.”
“Who’s watching Liam?”
Savannah smiled. Even though he’d only found about Liam today, Caden was already thinking about their son. “He’s at home with my friend. She’s a nurse at the hospital where I work. Charlotte is looking after him and my grandmother.”
“I heard she had a stroke.”
“That’s right.” Savannah drank a generous amount of bourbon and coughed when the liquid hit her throat, burning a path to her belly.
“Easy,” Caden said. “That’s a fine bourbon that’s meant to be sipped, not swallowed whole.”
Savannah coughed again. “I see that now.”
“Where’s your mother? Why isn’t she here in Baltimore taking care of her own mother?”
Savannah shrugged. “Carmen Vasquez can’t be bothered to take care of anyone but herself, though she does send money when she can.”
“Sounds like nothing has changed.”
Savannah remembered confiding in Caden about the issues she’d had with her mother growing up. They’d never seen eye to eye, and Savannah doubted that was ever going to change.
“No, it hasn’t. She’s hanging with her boy Friday of the week. Who knows how long it will last. In the meantime, I do what’s needed. I take care of my abuela and my son.”
Caden’s dark eyes grew stormy. “Our son.”
“Our son,” she corrected.
“Tell me about him.” Caden turned to face Savannah. “I’d like to know what he’s like.”
Thinking about Liam made Savannah smile again. “He’s amazing, Caden. He’s curious. Funny. He’s caring and sensitive. As you saw today, he can sense when I’m upset and hates it. He’s hella smart. I know when you think about autism, it’s scary, but Liam doesn’t have some of the same difficulties as other children. He has a milder autism spectrum disorder called Asperger’s syndrome. He can speak and understand things. He’s just bad at communication and interacting with other people.”
“What do you do to combat that?”
“He goes to a special school where he gets cognitive behavioral and physical therapy as well as social skills training.”
“Sounds intense.”
Savannah took another sip of bourbon. “At times, it can be. And I’d be lying if I told you I haven’t sometimes been overwhelmed, but I have always put Liam’s needs above my own.”
Caden’s gaze focused on her. “I believe that, Savannah. You don’t have to convince me.”
Savannah reached across the distance between them and touched Caden’s hand. There was a spark between them as there always seemed to be, and she didn’t run away from it. Instead, she ploughed on. “Yes, I do. I want you to know I didn’t keep you away from Liam deliberately. I’ve always believed I was doing what was best for you and for him.”
“By choosing for me?” Caden’s voice was laced with bitterness.
Savannah lowered her head, but Caden reached out and took her chin in his hand. “Look at me, and tell me to my face that you what you did was right.”
Tears sprang to her eyes, and she lowered her lashes. “I can’t. I can only tell you my rationale at the time.”
“And since then? I’ve been out of the military and established in my career for years, Savannah.”
“I didn’t know that.” She darted a furtive glance in his direction. “I’ve only been in Baltimore for about half a year. Before that, Liam and I lived in Orlando. We had a good life there, but when I heard about my grandmother, I had to come. Unfortunately, she needed more care than I’d originally thought, so I moved us here. That’s the God’s honest truth.”
“And the fundraiser?”
“What about it?”
“C’mon, Savannah. I thought we’re being honest here. Admit why you came.”
Savannah jerked herself out of Caden’s grasp and rose to her feet. She needed some distance between them. Being that close and Caden’s heated looks were doing wicked things to her body. She felt warm all over.
“I admit after all these years I was curious to know more about you. Charlotte told me you were running for governor. A patient had given her tickets to the event, but she wasn’t interested in going. So I went in her place.”
Caden sat back and relaxed in the recliner. “So I’m to believe after all this time has passed that you suddenly became curious about me?”
“It’s true. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about.”
His bold gaze raked Savannah from head to toe. “I think you’re lying. I think you came to the fundraiser for me.” He was on his feet in seconds and prowling toward her like a lion going after his prey. “Because like me, you haven’t forgotten how good it was between us and you wanted to see if it was real or if you’d imagined it. Am I right, or am I right?”
Savannah shook her head. “That’s nonsense. What you and I shared was over a decade ago. It’s long gone and buried.”
“Really?” Caden had made it to where she stood by the fireplace in seconds. “I think you’ve never forgotten me anymore than I’ve forgotten you, the woman who set me on fire. And guess what, Savi?”
“What?”
“Nothing has changed.” His long fingers wrapped around her waist and tugged her close. Savannah wanted to run away, but she couldn’t. His body was pressed into her own soft curves, and the two of them fit together like they always had.
Caden enclosed her nape with one hand while the other tilted her chin up with his thumb. Her breath stopped in her chest for several beats as Caden bent his head and lowered it to hers in a soft butterfly-light kiss. His lips whispering against hers were sheer perfection. The flame ignited, however, when Caden took the kiss deeper, delving into her mouth with hot, languid strokes of his tongue. He stole her breath away, and Savannah clutched at his shirt, desperate for something to hold on to.
She gasped when he backed her against the wall of the fireplace and his mouth dipped to take hers into a hot, hard kiss. His hand wound around a chunk of her hair as he angled her head so he could plunge even deeper inside her mouth. They were consuming each other with a ferocity that terrified Savannah because it reminded her
of how every kiss, every breath, every stroke of Caden’s mouth made the flame reach higher and higher.
A low groan tore itself from Caden’s throat while heat blossomed inside Savannah. Her breasts ached, and she felt a tingle of awareness between her legs. She was so far gone, so lost in him, she wanted to protest when Caden pulled back a fraction to survey her. “Admit why you came here tonight, Savannah.”
Savannah shook her head. She was too ashamed to admit the truth. Once again, Caden lowered his head. This time he pressed an open-mouthed kiss to her throat. He began tracing a path from her neck to her ear, which was her sweet spot. If he went there, she would be his.
She tried to shift against him to get away, but dear God, the friction caused her to come into direct contact with not only the solid wall of his hard chest, but with Caden’s very impressive erection. She sighed because he felt so deliciously good against her. She couldn’t wait to have him on top of her, underneath her, on the side of her, everywhere so long as he held her like this. She arched against him.
“Don’t try and deny it,” he drawled, his voice thick with passion. “Admit you came tonight because you wanted to see me. Be with me.”
Her cheeks fired. “I …” The denial was right there on her lips, but she couldn’t utter the words, couldn’t lie and say she didn’t want Caden. Had she subconsciously come here tonight for this purpose?
“That’s what I thought,” Caden said, and before she knew it, he took her down with him onto the rug in front of the fireplace. They were wrapped in a mass of limbs and feverishly began disrobing. Her top was the first to go, followed by her jeans, leaving her in a delicate pink bra and panty set. Then it was Caden’s turn. Savannah relieved him of his shirt with trembling hands, and he instantly shrugged it off. When she reached his belt buckle, she quickly whipped it off his jeans and helped him ease them down his legs until he was in his boxer briefs.
An artist wouldn’t have been able to capture the perfection of Caden’s body. Savannah had forgotten how truly spectacular he was with his flat washboard stomach and toned thighs. She licked her lips when she caught sight of his impressive shaft encased in the boxer briefs. It had been a long time since she’d been with a man, any man. Caden had been her only lover.
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