With Liam’s condition, he preferred order and everything exact, but he’d begun to take small steps in allowing less precision. Now, Liam had taken a step backward. She recognized this was his way of controlling the situation, so she didn’t say anything. Instead, she sat beside him, but he didn’t look up as he munched his cereal.
“Liam, I’m sorry,” Savannah said, trying again to reach him. She was desperate to make amends.
Liam was silent for several minutes, and Savannah worried he’d become unresponsive. But after he finished his cereal, he glanced up and said, “What are you sorry for? Are you sorry for not telling me? Or that my father told me first?”
“Both,” Savannah answered honestly. “I should have told you years ago, not Caden. I made a mistake because I was scared.”
Confusion colored Liam’s face. “Why?”
“I was afraid of losing you. It’s always been just the two of us. I feared what might happen if I told your father about you. I feared he might take you away from me.”
“No!” Liam yelled. “He can’t.”
Savannah shook her head. “Of course he wouldn’t, Liam. He’s a good man.” Even though she was angry with him, Caden was a man of principles. He would never separate a mother from her child. Savannah said, “I think deep down I knew that, but I let fear rule me for so long. And …” Her voice trailed off.
“And what?”
“And I didn’t want him to be mad at me for keeping you away from him.”
“Because you like him like TJ’s mom likes her boyfriend?”
Out of the mouths of babes, Savannah thought. It was so easy for Liam to verbalize what she herself had such a hard time accepting—that despite the passage of time, she wasn’t over Caden. In fact, her feelings had only gained strength. Was that why she was so angry at Caden? Was she actually angry at herself instead?
“Mom?”
Savannah glanced at her eleven-year-old and realized he was still waiting for an answer to his question.
“Yes, I like your father.”
Liam rose suddenly, nearly knocking the chair to the floor, and rushed toward the door. “We have to go, or I’ll be late for school.”
Savannah glanced at her watch. Sure enough, Liam was right. She caught up to him at the front door. “Liam?”
He turned around.
“I know you’re upset with me, but please know I love you and I will do all I can to help you build a relationship with your father if that’s what you want.”
Liam looked down at his feet. “I do.” He turned and walked out the door toward her Ford Escape.
Those two words gutted her because they told Savannah she hadn’t made the right decision in keeping Liam’s existence from Caden. Instead, she’d listened to his mother and made one of the worst decisions of her life.
Caden arrived at Savannah’s later that evening with his hat in hand, or rather another bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine as a reconciliation gift. Upon further reflection, he had come to realize he’d shown poor judgment in spitting out the truth to Liam. Although he didn’t regret his son knowing he was his father, he could have handled it better. He and Savannah should have discussed the matter first and figured out the best approach. Had he told Liam as punishment to get back at her? Or had he, in the moment, confronted with Liam’s questioning eyes, acted on instinct instead of methodically like he usually did?
It did not surprise him when Savannah ignored his calls and texts today. So he’d decided to show up unannounced and hoped she wouldn’t slam the door in his face. When he rang the bell, however, Liam opened the door.
Caden’s heart began pounding. This young man was his son. My son!
“Are those for my mom?” Liam asked, glancing at the flowers and wine in Caden’s arms.
“Y-Yes, they are. Is she here?”
Liam, outfitted in a track suit, nodded, and Caden stepped inside. They stood awkwardly eyeing each other. Caden wasn’t sure what to do. He didn’t really know his son, but he wanted to.
“Liam, who was at the door?” He heard Savannah’s voice ring out seconds before she arrived to the foyer. She stopped in her tracks when she saw Caden standing in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to apologize,” Caden said, holding up the flowers and wine.
Savannah glanced at Liam, who was watching their encounter closely. Caden sensed she was warring with herself about how she should react. On the one hand, she probably wanted to throw him out. On the other hand, their son had a right to get to know him.
Would she deny Liam to spite Caden?
“Well, don’t just stand there, Mom,” Liam said, unexpectedly breaking his silence. “Those should go in water.”
Savannah held out her arms. Caden handed her the flowers and the wine. “Thank you. These are lovely.”
“You’re welcome,” said Caden, who was happy for Liam’s verbal assist. “That’s a good bottle of cabernet sauvignon if you’re interested in trying it.”
“Sure. I’ll go get some glasses while you and Liam chat.” She spun on her heel, leaving Caden alone with Liam.
Caden turned to his son, who stood in the corner away from him. “Would you like to talk?” Caden asked. “You could ask me anything you want to know.”
Liam eyed him suspiciously. “Anything?”
Caden nodded. “Of course.”
Liam walked past Caden and into the living room. Caden followed him and noticed that Liam sat in the single recliner. He’d hoped Liam might sit next to him, but he had to realize Liam wasn’t comfortable with him and Caden wasn’t sure if he ever would be. “So, what would you like to know?”
“How old are you?”
“Thirty-four.”
“That’s old,” Liam commented. “Do you have any brothers and sisters? I’m an only child, and I’ve always wanted a baby brother or sister.”
“Have you?” Caden asked. Perhaps after his discussion with Savannah, they could do something about that wish. Caden had always wanted children, but as he’d grown older and hadn’t found the one, he’d begun to wonder if he’d ever be a father. Now, he not only had a son, there was the possibility of more children if Savannah was willing.
“Yep.” Liam nodded but kept his head lowered. Caden noticed his son didn’t look him in the eye. He’d read that was one of the symptoms of autism. “Do you have an abuela?”
Caden laughed. “No, my grandma passed away some years ago, but my grandfather, your great-grandfather, is alive, as are my parents. So you have another abuela and a grandpa.”
“I can only have one abuela,” Liam said, “but I suppose I can call your mom ‘Grandma.’”
Caden laughed again. “I’m sure she would like that very much.”
At that moment, Savannah returned carrying a tray with the wine, two glasses, and an opener. Caden rose to his feet to help her. “I’ve got it,” she said sharply, quickly moving away from him.
Is she afraid of me touching her? Caden wondered. Despite his thoughts, he was just as aware of her in a pair of skinny jeans and a loose flowing top, especially when she bent down to open the wine and he could see the curve of her backside. He’d stroked her bottom many times the night they’d spent together. He liked that Savannah was wearing her chestnut hair, streaked with honey-blond highlights, down. Soft curls hung along her back.
She easily dispensed with the cork and poured them both a glass. He accepted the wineglass when she offered him one. “Thank you.”
“What were you guys talking about?” She glanced at Caden then Liam.
“Mr. Mitchell was telling me that I have a great-grandfather and a grandma and grandpa,” Liam responded quickly. “That’s a lot of people.”
“You don’t have to call me ‘Mr. Mitchell,’” Caden told Liam.
Liam frowned. He glanced at Savannah. “Wha
t should I call you?”
Caden swallowed the lump in his throat. “How about ‘Dad’?” At the curious look on Savannah’s face, he added, directing his comment toward Liam, “If that’s okay with you?”
“Would you like that, Liam?” He noticed Savannah was searching Liam’s eyes for a sign of approval.
“But you haven’t been my dad,” Liam stated. “Not like my mom. She’s always been there. I just met you.”
“True,” Caden conceded. “But I would like to get to know you, to be your dad if you’d let me.”
Liam shrugged. “I don’t know what it’s like to be a dad. I can’t tell you.”
Caden chuckled. “I know. That’s for me to figure out, as long as you’re willing.” Caden had never wanted something so much in his entire life. He wanted to be Liam’s father, but would Liam let him? To Liam, this was all new and because of his autism, he liked structure, not change.
“I think I might like to have a dad,” Liam responded. “I could be like other kids.”
“And I would love to have you as my son.” Caden choked up as he said the words, and when he glanced at Savannah, he noticed her eyes were glistening with unshed tears. It was a momentous occasion for all of them. They were agreeing to be a family, and he wanted that more than anything for his boy.
“Okay, then I’ll call you ‘Dad.’” Liam rose from the recliner. “Can I go to my room now?” he asked his mother.
“Yes, I’ll call you when dinner is ready,” Savannah replied, wiping away her tears with the back of her hand, and Liam left the room. “That went better than I imagined it would, especially considering yesterday.”
“What do you mean ‘considering yesterday’?” Caden asked, frowning in consternation.
Savannah let out a chuckle or a sob, Caden wasn’t quite sure, as she stood up. “Of course you wouldn’t understand because after you dropped the bombshell of being Liam’s father, you left and I had to deal with the fallout.” She turned and exited the room, leaving Caden to wonder exactly what she meant.
Savannah wasn’t surprised when Caden followed her into the kitchen. Rather than look at him, she placed her wineglass in the sink facing the window and stared at her abuela’s garden. It was a lot of trouble to keep it going, but when she needed to decompress, Savannah would go outside and get her hands dirty in the soil. Somehow, that always seemed to make things all better.
Liam may have accepted Caden as his father, but she doubted that he truly understood all that implied. That, however, didn’t excuse Caden’s behavior from last night. Savannah certainly hadn’t. She was still fuming over his complete disregard for her or her feelings on the matter.
Sure, he’d tried to call afterward, but the damage was already done. Liam knew the truth and deep down still blamed her for keeping Caden from him.
“What happened when I left?” Caden asked from behind her.
She sighed heavily. Why should she be the only one carrying the load? She spun around to face Caden. “Liam had a complete meltdown the likes of which I haven’t seen in years. He yelled and threw things and wouldn’t let me touch him.”
“Can you blame him, Savannah?”
“No. I blame you.” She focused her hazel-green eyes on him. “You’re the one who dropped the bomb on him with no thought of the fallout. He’s an eleven-year-old autistic boy. Do you have any idea what you’ve done? You could have set him back years. But no, you wanted to claim him, show him you’re the father and won’t be denied. Well, you did that, Caden, but I,” she said, slamming her fist against her chest, “was the one who calmed him, the one who stayed up with him all night until he could fall asleep.”
“And why is that, Savannah?” Caden glared at her. “Because you kept our son from me. You didn’t allow me the chance to be there, to get to know him, to help take the load off your shoulders. But that’s going to change now. You don’t have to do it all alone. I’m his father, and I’m here. I want to help. I just may need some guidance doing it.”
“Can’t you just admit you were wrong, that you did this to get back at me?”
“Yes, Savi, I can.” Caden walked toward her and grasped her by the shoulders. “I admit I handled last night terribly. You and I should have discussed this, perhaps brought in a therapist to ease Liam into the transition of learning I’m his father. I was wrong.”
Savannah’s shoulders sagged. It was one thing to have righteous indignation on her side, but it was another thing entirely when the other person admitted their failure. “What do we do now?”
“I have a solution,” Caden said, and when Savannah began to speak, he placed his index finger on her mouth, silencing her. “Before you lose your cool again, at least hear me out. I promise you that in the long run this will work out for you, me, and Liam.”
Savannah looked at him suspiciously. What did Caden have up his sleeve? “Alright, I’m listening.”
“I think you and Liam should move in with me and we should put your abuela in a great facility near my house. But first things first.” He paused for several beats, and Savannah suspected she wasn’t going to like what came next. “We should get married.”
Chapter 13
“Married?” Savannah’s mouth curved around the word.
Caden met her eyes. “Yes. Married. It’s the perfect solution. It allows me and Liam to get acquainted and ensures you’re not the only one carrying the load in this family.”
“Family?”
“Are you going to keep repeating every word I say?” Caden asked. Savannah seemed shell-shocked, so he reached for her hand. The moment he touched her, sensations flowed between them just as they had when they first reunited. “Surely, you see this arrangement would be best for everyone?”
Savannah tugged back her hand and stepped away from him. “Best for everyone? Or best for you, Caden? You’re running for public office, so to have a wife and child ties us up into a nice pretty bow for you, doesn’t it? But Liam and I are not chess pieces or pawns to be moved around as you see fit.”
“That’s not how I see you, and you know it.”
“But you don’t deny that it benefits you?”
“Marriage benefits both of us.” Caden held her gaze. “C’mon, Savannah. You’ve already admitted that you’ve struggled taking care of your abuela and Liam with little help from your mother. Marrying me will give Liam stability along with a mother and a father and a host of uncles and grandparents.”
“I could do without your mother,” Savannah said.
“Understood, and we can work on that. What other objections would you have? I can help give your abuela the best around-the-clock care. You wouldn’t have to work so hard and could be there for Liam more. Wouldn’t that be great?”
“Of course.”
“Then it’s settled.”
“No, it’s not settled, Caden. You can’t come in here and run roughshod over me and think I’m going to agree. This is all too much, too fast.”
“This or us.” If he was reading her reaction correctly, Savannah was afraid of their relationship and what it might entail. “You and I are good together, Savannah. We always were, and twelve years hasn’t changed that. Thoughts of you keep invading my mind. I can’t sleep thinking about how good it was and how much I want to be with you. Tell me it hasn’t been that way for you.”
Savannah couldn’t say it because she had thought of him. Often, her body had been restless. Hot. Achy. She’d longed to have him deep inside her, but she was afraid to admit she wanted him as much as he wanted her. The sexual pull between them was strong, and she felt her nipples turn hard. Could he see the hard points in the top she wore?
She turned away from him, but he spun her around and drew her into his arms. The moment his lips touched hers, passion erupted. They kissed hungrily, as if they could quench the desire between them. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed again
st him, needing to feel his hard body against her soft female limbs. His hand wrapped around her waist, and he pulled her firmly to him.
Savannah felt his arousal against her. She let out a startled gasp, and his tongue slid inside her mouth. Their tongues dueled, tangled, and mated in the most elemental way imaginable. How was it that this man whom she hadn’t seen in years could have this effect on her? He made her bold and wild.
When he finally pulled his mouth away, a sensuous smile touched his lips. “Savannah, imagine how good it could be with unfettered access. We could have this every night, with no interruptions.”
That’s what she feared. If she allowed herself, she could get consumed by Caden and the passion he evoked in her. “Marriage can’t be based on sex alone, Caden.” Savannah had always imagined that if she ever did get married she would marry for love. Caden certainly wasn’t claiming love, more like lust, though he offered stability and the chance to finally give Liam a two-parent home. Could she deny Liam that?
“I want to marry you, Savannah, and claim our son,” Caden said, stroking her cheek. “Say yes.”
“I need to think.”
“What’s there to think about? I want you in my bed every night.”
“Stop it.” Savannah placed her hands over her ears. “You’re saying all these things trying to seduce me or confuse me or both.” She fought to catch her breath, but that was hard to do when her mind kept replaying the kiss a moment ago and the way he’d tasted her lips as if he was trying to commit their shape and texture to memory.
“Seduce you? Yes,” Caden admitted with a knowing smile. “Confuse you? No. I want you to marry me because you want to and because it’s the right decision. I can make you happy, Savi. Please say yes and turn back the clock and give us the time we should have had twelve years ago.”
Damn him. He’d gone in for the kill, reminding her of how wonderful it had been between them back then. Twelve years ago, she and Caden had talked about marriage, and she’d been thrilled, ecstatic even, with the notion of becoming his wife. Then she’d met his mother and allowed her insecurity of not being good enough ruin a good thing. Was she really going to walk away from the only man she’d ever loved a second time? Have Liam miss out on having the father he’d always wanted?
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