Reign or Shine

by Michelle Rowen

  “It’s about a handsome vampire and a beautiful woman who was his wife hundreds of years ago. She’s been reincarnated so she doesn’t quite remember him, but in her soul she knows that she’s always loved him.”

  I thought about my father and how he’d loved my mother before being parted from her. How he was trapped inside the castle and now was going to die all alone.

  “Does it have a happy ending?” I asked.

  “Of course.” She smiled. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  I put the book on my bedside table. “I really want you to have a happy ending, too, Mom.”

  She sat next to me on the bed and put her arm around me. “Happy endings only happen for characters in books. The rest of us have to deal with reality.”

  I’d begun to slowly relax now that my brush with death had officially passed. I’d been so scared that I’d almost drunk the potion. If my mom hadn’t stopped me . . . I’d already be forgetting everything.

  Then I wondered if that would have been so bad. Mom was right. Happy endings weren’t that realistic—not in my case, anyway.

  “Maybe you just haven’t found your handsome vampire yet,” I said.

  She scrunched her nose. “Not sure I’d go for a vampire. I hate the sight of blood.”

  “But since you write about them, you must think that . . . monsters . . . are kind of sexy, right?”

  It was a baited question, I’ll admit it. If my father could have had his chance to tell her his secrets, what would she have done? Would she have run screaming from the room at his demon form? Or would she have loved him anyway?

  I didn’t know. I guessed I’d never know.

  She shook her head. “It’s just a book, honey. It’s not like monsters actually exist.”

  “Right.” I cleared my throat. “Forget about it.”

  After another minute she left my room to get her dress for me to borrow. I wanted to tell her that I wasn’t going to the dance. Winter Formal was the last thing I wanted to think about, but again I didn’t say anything.

  I was tired. So tired.

  I put my head down on my pillow and even though my brain was going a million miles a minute, I fell asleep right away.

  When I woke up it was because my mom was yelling up the stairs for me. “Nikki! Melinda’s on the phone for you!”

  I sat up and rubbed my eyes and then looked at the clock. It was nearly six thirty. I’d just slept for four hours.

  Not good.

  I grabbed for the receiver and held it to my ear. “Melinda?” My voice came out all croaky.

  “Please tell me you’re almost ready,” she said simply.

  I swallowed hard. “Not exactly.”

  “You’re bailing on the dance, aren’t you?” She sounded mad.

  “I . . . I don’t really think I’m feeling so great—I’m coming down with something. It’s probably better if I just stay home.”

  There was a long pause. “Is it because you’re not into Chris anymore?”

  I sighed. “That has a little to do with it, but it’s not the only reason.”

  Another long pause. “I don’t understand what’s going on with you.”

  “Look, Melinda, you’ll have a good time tonight. Everybody will be there. You won’t even notice that I’m missing.”

  She didn’t say anything for a moment, but I could hear a muffled sound.

  “Why are you crying?”

  “I’m not crying. That’s ridiculous.” She sniffed.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s okay, Nikki,” she said. “I get it. You don’t want to be my friend. It’s fine. It would help if you just came right out and said it.”

  “Melinda, that isn’t what I’m saying.”

  “It’s just . . . I don’t know. This town . . . everybody is so fake.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “It is. Larissa is super friendly, but I know she’s just using me, too, like today with getting her hair and makeup done. She wants to be friends with the popularity, not with me. She even passed my screening process, but she’s just like the rest of them.”

  I couldn’t exactly argue that one. “She’s not that bad.”

  “You have to come to the dance. I’m stressed out about Winter Queen. I have to win and you have to be there with me.”

  I racked my brain for another excuse, but I couldn’t exactly tell her the truth, could I?

  Definitely not.

  “Please, Nikki.” There was an odd tone of desperation and loneliness to her words. Who would ever believe that the most popular girl in Erin Heights had issues with insecurity? “You don’t have to stay all night. Just an hour or two.”

  “You do know how needy you sound, right?”

  She laughed a little at that. “It’s pathetic, I know. Don’t make me beg. It won’t be pretty.”

  I let out a long sigh and looked at the dress hanging from my closet door—the one that my mom must have delivered during my four-hour power nap. “Okay. Fine. I’ll go.”

  “Then get dressed! And hurry up, we’ve got to be there in an hour.”

  Great. Just great.

  I hung up the phone and tried to relax. The last thing I needed right now was to turn Darkling again. After a few minutes, I forced myself to put everything out of my mind. I then ran to take the shortest shower of my life. After blow-drying my hair, I quickly attempted an updo that surprisingly worked out better than expected.

  When I finished with my makeup, I grabbed the Austrian crystal earrings Mom had gotten me as a birthday present and put them on. Last but not least, I slipped the gorgeous, spaghetti-strapped, backless lavender silk dress over my head and felt the luxurious material skim along my skin as it fell into place.

  I also borrowed my mom’s heels—silver strappy designer heels not terribly appropriate for December weather, but they looked fantastic with the dress. I finished right at the stroke of seven o’clock, just as the doorbell rang.

  The limo was here to pick me up.

  A last peek in my vanity mirror showed a wild-eyed blonde girl wearing a beautiful dress. I took a quick, shallow breath that sounded shaky at best.

  I would go because Melinda, my crazy, overdramatic, popular-on-the-outside best friend wanted me to.

  I would try to be normal.

  I would try not to think about my father. I would try to forget about Michael.

  But I knew there was only one way for me to truly forget. One way for me to truly be normal.

  I had to drink the potion.

  I picked up the small bottle from the table next to my discarded makeup and stared at it for a moment.

  Another quick glance at the mirror reflected a girl holding a small innocuous-looking bottle, her hazel, black-rimmed eyes shiny with tears, as she contemplated forever wiping away the memory that she was a demon princess.

  Drink it.

  My gaze narrowed at my reflection.

  I’ll drink it later.

  I slipped the bottle into my purse and headed out to the limo.

  13

  Chris wore a tuxedo that looked tailor-made for him. Since his family was wealthy, it probably had been. Honestly, the guy was absolutely gorgeous. Perfect hair, perfect face, perfect body. He smiled when he saw me—a perfect smile.

  “Wow,” he said. “Nikki, you look amazing.”

  “Thanks.” I gave him a weak smile. It wasn’t his fault that, despite his perfection, I wasn’t head-over-heels in love with him. But I wouldn’t tell him tonight. In the end, it wouldn’t matter anyway. He’d have no problem finding somebody else who would be beyond thrilled to date him.

  But who knew? When I took the potion I might feel about Chris like I had before.

  After I forgot about Michael.

  I swallowed past the big lump in my throat as I remembered kissing him last night.

  Good night, not good-bye.

  I wished I could have seen him again. So much.

  Chris led me out to the limo
where Melinda was waiting with her date, a college freshman named Stephen whose full attention was currently on his BlackBerry. Melinda, as expected, looked absolutely stunning in a full-length red dress fit for a potential Winter Queen.

  “When can we leave this thing?” Stephen asked, tucking the BlackBerry into his inner jacket pocket. He wasn’t as good-looking as Chris. In fact, I thought he resembled a thin-faced rat. I had absolutely no idea what Melinda saw in him. “There’s a big party at my frat house tonight.”

  Melinda sighed. “Does no one except me want to go to the dance tonight?”

  “I do,” Chris said quickly.

  Stephen snorted. “Maybe Nikki and I should hang out and leave you two to your lame dance.”

  I grimaced. Well, that was unlikely.

  I stared out the limo window for the rest of the short ride and tried to remain calm, cool, and collected. The limo came to a stop in front of the high school and it was a blur getting out. Chris took my hand in his and pulled me along behind him through the crowd of people milling around outside. They parted like the Red Sea to let us through. It was seriously surreal.

  I was surrounded by hundreds of happy, excited people and I’d never felt so alone.

  The rest of the Royal Party bounded toward us with their dates—all of them Chris’s friends—trailing behind as if attached by invisible wires.

  “Melinda, you look gorgeous!”

  “Your hair . . . it’s fabulous!”

  “You are so going to be Winter Queen!”

  Melinda turned to me and rolled her eyes so only I could see it. That made me smile a little.

  “Let’s get inside,” Chris said. “It’s freezing out here.”

  Funny. I hadn’t even noticed.

  I wasn’t wearing a jacket. Mom had wanted me to, but it was only a short walk from the limo to the inside of the school, and besides, no one else was wearing a coat. Call me stubborn.

  I wondered if that was another trait I shared with my father.

  Inside, the decorating committee had done a fantastic job of turning the gym into a magical place. They’d spared no expense. At my last school in San Diego, before Mom married Robert and I had to transfer to Erin Heights, dances hadn’t been such a big deal, but here they were the ultimate event. And they treated it that way, both the students and the teachers. When this one was over they’d immediately start planning the next one, trying to outdo what they’d done tonight.

  That would be difficult. All my troubles were momentarily swept away as the flickering lights that sprinkled across the dance floor washed over me. The walls had been covered in dark blue fabric. The ceiling hung with streamers that sparkled as the light caught them. There were tables all around the edges of the dance floor, draped in shimmering cloth. Even the chairs were covered with ribbons and drapery to hide their utilitarian outsides. The deejay had set up to the left side of the stage where the Winter King and Queen would be crowned. To the far right was a long buffet table holding hors d’oeuvres, pastries, bottles of water, and a big bowl of red fruit punch.

  Everyone in attendance looked stunning. It was like they’d spent hours getting ready, which was—according to how empty the school had been that afternoon before I left—probably an accurate assessment.

  Each table had an ornate centerpiece of flowers, paper snowflakes, and balloons. It sounded tacky, but somehow it managed to look elegant. The balloons were white and silver and bore the imprint “Winter Magic.”

  It did feel magical.

  But I still didn’t want to be there.

  I absently touched my dragon’s tear bracelet, twisting it around and around.

  I’d stay for an hour and then I’d make my excuses to leave. When I got home I’d drink the potion. I’d decided once and for all.

  Melinda came to my side and reached down to squeeze my hand. She wore a big smile. “I won’t forget this, Nikki. Thank you for coming. I’m so glad you moved to Erin Heights.”

  I laughed a little. “You’re just saying that because I saved you from choking.”

  She shook her head. “See . . . that was fate. If that hadn’t happened I might never have gotten to know you.” She frowned. “Well, also I’d probably be dead. But I just feel like I can trust you. That you’d tell me anything.”

  “Well . . .”

  She raised her eyebrows. “What?”

  “If I am being perfectly honest . . .”

  “Yes?”

  “I think your new boyfriend is a jerk.”

  She sighed. “I think you might be right about that.”

  “No, actually, I know I am. He’s hitting on Larissa right now.”

  She turned her head to see Stephen with his hand braced against the wall behind the brunette in question—the same one who’d spent all afternoon with Melinda getting gorgeous. Larissa looked up at Stephen as if he was a movie star. He tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear. She giggled.

  “Well, that’s unfortunate,” Melinda said out loud.

  “Sorry.”

  She gave a small shrug. “Don’t be. Guys are a dime a dozen, but real friends are way harder to find.”

  “You sound like a Hallmark card.”

  “My parents want me to be a doctor, but that’s what I’m really going to do after high school. Be a writer for greeting cards.” Her smile faded and she sighed shakily. “Things are difficult for me right now, Nikki. Nobody knows. Maybe that’s why I want tonight to be as perfect as possible. It might be my last chance to be completely normal.”

  I looked at her intently. I guess we really did have more in common than I thought. After all, I’m sure I was the least normal person in the entire room. Possibly the entire world. “What’s wrong?”

  She shook her head. “I can’t talk about it.”

  “I’m having some issues, too.” To say the least.

  “With Chris?”

  I glanced over in his direction. Chris was laughing with one of his friends. “No, it doesn’t have anything to do with him.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “Well, if you tell me yours, I might tell you mine.”

  Melinda looked so open, so curious, and hopeful that I’d share my big secret, that right then and there I decided to tell her. I’d only known her for a couple of months, but if anyone might be able to help me deal with my problems, it just might be her. I trusted her. It would be a huge weight off my shoulders if I could share it with somebody.

  “Well . . . ,” I said, looking around our immediate surroundings to make sure no one was listening in. “I just found out I’m a half-demon princess.”

  Then I clamped my mouth shut. It sounded just as crazy as it did in my head, and the look on her face—sort of a stunned confusion as if that was the last thing she ever expected me to say—was enough to make me wish I hadn’t said anything at all. Was it too late to take it back?

  I cleared my throat nervously and tried to grin at her. “I’m kidding, of course.”

  Thankfully, that brought a smile to her face again. “Well, it’s good that you’re kidding because I just found out that I’m a demon slayer, so I’d probably have to kill you.” She went quiet for a moment. “I’m kidding, too, of course.”

  “Funny.” I forced a laugh.

  Although, I didn’t think it was that funny. In fact, the idea that she was even remotely serious made me feel sick to my stomach.

  I tried to put it out of my mind. After all, Melinda sure didn’t look like somebody who might spend her spare time slaying demons.

  Then again, at the moment I didn’t look all that royally demonic.

  A half hour later, Melinda was crowned Winter Queen. No big surprise there. The surprise was that Chris was crowned Winter King—despite my previous mega crush on him, I didn’t even know he was up for the title. After the announcement, he wore the crown, tipped with little plastic snowflakes, proudly.

  “I’m king,” he kept saying.

  “Congrats.”

  “We can leave now, if you wa
nt. We’ll get the limo to swing by your house. I get the feeling that you’re not having much fun.”

  I was a terrible actress. Despite wanting to forget about Michael and about everything else, I was failing horribly. My problems hadn’t left my mind for a moment.

  The fact that Chris had noticed and didn’t want to force me to stay any longer earned him significant bonus points. I’d go home and try to contact Michael one last time. But after that . . . drinking the potion was my only option.

  Fate. It was all about fate.

  “Thanks,” I said to Chris.

  “Let’s go.”

  I said good-bye to Melinda and some of the other members of the Royal Party. Then Chris took my hand and led me across the dance floor and out of the gym completely. After a moment we were back outside in the cold air. Was it this cold when we’d arrived? It had to be below zero out there. The sky was dark and clear and I could see the constellations overhead that Mom always pointed out to me when I was a little girl, although now I knew that she’d been making most of them up.

  The limo was parked to the side of the parking lot near a long fence, but the driver was nowhere to be seen.

  “We’ll wait inside until he gets back,” Chris suggested.

  I wrapped my bare arms around myself and rubbed them to try to warm up. Chris opened the back door and disappeared inside. After a moment, I joined him. Once I was in, he reached over and pulled the door closed behind me.

  Yes, it was much warmer in there. But dark. I could see out, but I knew the tinted glass meant that no one could see in. It was silent and peaceful and I could finally think clearly away from the loud, throbbing music in the gym.

  Chris patted the seat next to him. “Come and sit next to me. You look frozen.”

  I sighed, but moved over to him. Getting closer to him helped warm me immediately.

  “Lame dance, right?” he said.

  I shook my head. “The dance was great. I . . . I’m just not feeling up to it tonight.”

  “Why not?”

  I pressed back in the seat. “I’ve been dealing with some problems this week.”

  “Like what?”