Ashley’s hands began to shake. This was really happening. Her son was about to stand beside his girlfriend while she gave birth. She contacted Landon and he was immediately on his way home to watch the kids. Cole had texted that Ashley could come to the delivery room. Elise wanted Ashley there so she could pray for her.
The whole way to the hospital and while she parked the car, on the elevator ride up to labor and delivery, Ashley told herself she could handle this. That Cole wasn’t the father and she wasn’t about to watch her own grandchild come into the world.
But nothing could’ve prepared her for what she saw when she walked into Elise’s labor room. Cole was standing at her side, squeezing her hand, talking her through a contraction. “You’ve got this, Elise.” He looked at the monitor. “Come on, you can do it. This one’s almost done.”
Ashley took a step back. Until the contraction passed, she just stood there, taking in the scene. Of the army of emotions surrounding Ashley, a few stood out. First, Cole was going to make a wonderful doctor someday. And second, when the time was right, Cole was going to be an incredible father.
She wouldn’t let her other thoughts take hold. The idea that Elise could still change her mind, and Cole could, too. Instead, when the contraction was over, Ashley stepped in to do what she’d come to do. What everyone in the room desperately needed.
She joined Cole beside Elise’s bed and they prayed.
22
It was almost time.
Cole and his mom had been at Elise’s bedside for seven hours, the last ninety minutes of which she’d been pushing. The whole time he had stood near her head, looking away whenever a doctor or nurse came in to check her. Being here for her was one thing. But he had no intention of seeing her in such an intimate, vulnerable way. Because of the hospital sheet, all Cole could see were Elise’s legs. He was grateful for that. And now, the moment was clearly getting close because three nurses and Elise’s doctor had entered the room.
“Any minute,” the doctor said. He helped position Elise’s feet into the stirrups on either side of the table. “You’re doing great, Elise. I can see your baby’s head.”
The room tipped, and Cole gripped the top of the hospital bed so he wouldn’t look dizzy. The baby’s head? This was really happening. It was more than Cole could believe.
His mother still stood across from him, and now she leaned in near Elise’s face. “You okay?”
“I . . . think so.” Elise squeezed her eyes shut. “I feel sick.”
Cole didn’t know what to do. “I can get you a cold cloth.”
“Yes, please. Hurry.” Elise’s face was red. As Cole left, out of the corner of his eye he saw her lift up her legs and hold her knees. “I need to push!”
“Not yet, Elise.” The doctor’s voice was kind but urgent. “Not until I tell you to.”
There was a sink in the room, so Cole took a clean cloth from the cupboard above it and got it wet. He was back at Elise’s side in seconds.
“Thank you.” She smiled at him through weary, anxious eyes.
Cole nodded. “Of course.” He had read that sometimes girls could be mean during labor. Not sure what they wanted and snapping at everyone who tried to help.
Elise hadn’t been like that at all. Cole laid the cool rag on her forehead just as the next contraction hit. This time the doctor moved into position. “Okay, I’ll talk you through it, Elise. Here comes the head.”
Cole shared a look with his mom. He had never known exactly what she’d gone through to bring him into the world until now. His mom squeezed Elise’s hand. “You’re doing it. She’s almost here!”
This time Cole couldn’t help but look. From his angle he could only see the baby’s head. Wonder came over him. Here was the greatest miracle the Lord had given them, the miracle of life. To stand by and watch was as much proof of God as anything Cole could imagine.
“There you go, Elise.” The doctor had hold of the infant’s head now. “Okay, push again, just a little.”
Elise grabbed her knees and pushed and then in a quick movement, the baby girl was out and the doctor laid her on Elise’s stomach. At first the baby didn’t cry. She was gray and slimy and covered in some kind of white cream. Also she was still attached to the umbilical cord.
Cole could never have imagined a moment like this. While he was trying to remember how to breathe, the tiny baby did a few gasps and began to wail. Loud and strong.
“She’s perfect.” Cole’s mom put her hand on Elise’s shoulder. “How are you feeling?”
Elise laughed but it was a mix of elation and relief. “I can’t believe I did it.” She seemed to instinctively know to put her hand on the infant’s back. “It’s okay, baby girl. It’s okay. Mama’s here.”
Cole still hadn’t said a word. But now, watching Elise with her newborn, he finally understood the full weight of the decision she faced. The one she thought she’d already made. After all this, placing her daughter with another family would be brutally hard.
“You did great, Elise.” Cole still stayed near her head, allowing her a fraction of privacy as the doctor delivered the placenta. Cole took a deep breath. It was crazy that he even knew that a placenta had to be delivered. He’d learned so much because of Elise.
Again he watched her with her baby. This bonding time was the attorney’s idea. Mr. Green seemed intent on Elise not missing out on anything. If she could go through all this and still place the baby with the adoptive parents, then it was meant to be.
The attorney didn’t want Elise having any regrets. Whatever happened after this, Cole was grateful Elise got to experience her child. After all, she was the baby’s mother. Even if the best choice was for someone else to raise her.
Just then the doctor handed Cole a pair of scissors. “Would you like to cut the cord?”
He thinks I’m the baby’s daddy, Cole thought. But it didn’t matter. One day he hoped to make his future out of moments like this, maybe right here at Bloomington Hospital. He looked at his mom and she gave him the slightest nod. “Go ahead.”
Cole put his hand on Elise’s other shoulder. “You did it, Elise.” He had to say this first. “God helped you. Your baby girl is beautiful.”
“Because of you.” She was crying now, happy tears falling onto her cheeks. “I couldn’t have done it without God and you.” She looked at Cole’s mom. “And you, Mrs. Blake.”
His mother smiled. “I’m glad you wanted me here.”
Cole turned to the doctor. And—in the most surreal moment of his life—he took the strange-looking scissors from the man and cut the baby’s cord. The whole time Cole could only think one thing.
How could Elise say goodbye to her baby girl after this?
• • •
LUCY WAS ON her way into work the second of August when she got the call. All along they had known that Elise’s due date was August 14. Still a ways off but when Lucy checked caller ID and saw it was their attorney, she instantly pulled over and answered the phone.
“I tried to reach Aaron, but he didn’t pick up. I wanted you to know,” he sounded happy, but guarded. “Elise had her baby late last night. A healthy little girl.”
“Dear God . . .” Lucy closed her eyes and gripped the steering wheel with her free hand. Was this really happening? They had learned months ago that the child was a girl. And they had given her the name Gracie Anne. Elise knew about the name, and apparently she loved it. Gracie Anne Williams.
If Elise didn’t change her mind.
But until now all of this hadn’t ever felt real. It was all legal documents and the temperament of a teenage mom. Now, though . . . now everything had changed. Was it possible they could have a child of their own in just fourteen days?
“Anyway,” Mr. Green was going on. “I visited Elise this morning at the hospital.” He paused. “She still wants to go through with the adoption.”
Of course she does, Lucy wanted to tell him. She bounced up and down in her seat, her heart soaring within
her. This was God’s doing. Aaron had heard the Lord tell him that they would have a baby soon. And now their little girl was here. Just hours old.
They’d been this close before, but this time was different. Lucy knew in her soul. Gracie Anne was theirs.
But before she could say any of that, Mr. Green added, “I must caution you, she still has the—”
“Two weeks.” Lucy’s voice had never sounded happier as she finished his sentence. “I know. Isn’t that wonderful, Mr. Green? That means in just fourteen days that little girl will be ours.” She refused to give in to fear, refused to let this day be anything but a party. “So is it okay if we don’t worry about that today? Can we just celebrate?”
The attorney was quiet for a moment. “Yes.” He sighed. “You can celebrate.” His voice was hardly celebratory. “Just know that birth moms who have changed their minds before, often change them again. I don’t want you and Aaron to get hurt by this.”
“Too late.” This time she didn’t filter her thoughts. “Mr. Green, if we lose this baby, we will be hurt to the core. We’ll remember it forever, just like every other baby we’ve lost these past ten years.” She wasn’t finished. “We bought a crib seven years ago, Mr. Green. We have baby animal sheets and Winnie-the-Pooh curtains and teddy bears just dying for little hands to play with them.” She gathered herself. “So thank you for the warning. But it’s too late.”
“Okay.” His voice fell a little. “Then yes, celebrate. You and Aaron certainly deserve that much.”
Lucy barely felt the asphalt beneath her feet as she hurried from her car to the hospital’s administrative wing. The baby was here. She was born and she was right here in this building. She opened her husband’s office door and their eyes met. He signaled that he was winding up a call and that he wanted her to stay. He didn’t look away from her, as if he must’ve seen the joy in her face.
When he hung up he hurried to her and took her hands. “What is it?”
“She’s here. The baby girl. Gracie Anne.” Lucy felt the beginning of tears but she held them back. Today was a party. She wouldn’t have it any other way. “She was born late last night.”
Aaron blinked back tears, too, and he let his head fall lightly against hers. “This is it, Lucy. Our little girl.”
There was no reason to warn Aaron the way Mr. Green had warned her earlier. They both knew the risks, the possibilities. But right now none of that mattered. Aaron looked at her again. “Can we see her?”
Lucy was wondering the same thing. Of course, she could easily see the baby, since she worked on the maternity floor. Elise knew that, which made the situation a little tricky. Technically they weren’t supposed to see the baby until after the two weeks. If Elise still wanted to place the baby for adoption.
Should they stop by her room? Talk to her? Tell her how grateful they were that she’d chosen them? Aaron was the first to recall their agreement, the paperwork they’d signed at the beginning.
“If we visit Elise even once, she could take that as coercion.” Aaron took a step back and leaned against his desk. “This whole situation needs to be by the book. For all of us.”
Lucy remembered one more document, though. “The paperwork also says that I can’t be prevented from seeing the baby.” She felt a thrill of hope. “Because I work on the maternity ward. Remember?”
“True.” Aaron’s anxious expression eased a little.
Lucy’s heart pounded at the thought. The other nurses in the unit didn’t know Aaron and Lucy were in the process of adopting. It would be perfectly normal for her to check on the baby girl. Brooke was the only doctor aware of the situation. Brooke’s nephew was dating Elise, after all. They had found that out a few weeks ago.
But Brooke was off today.
“I think we can see the baby.” Lucy crossed her arms. Her heart had never beat so hard in all her life.
“I’m going to stay here.” Aaron had clearly made up his mind. “But yes . . . it’s okay for you. Based on everything we agreed to.” He came to her and took her face in his hands. “When you see her, pray for her. And tell her Daddy’s praying, too.”
Lucy could hardly wait. The walk from Aaron’s office to the nursing station in the maternity ward had never taken longer. Her heart was in her throat and every outbreath was a struggle. She signed in and said hello to her co-workers. Yes she was having a good morning. No she hadn’t seen the new Tom Hanks movie.
Finally it was time to make her rounds. The baby was healthy, so she wouldn’t be in the NICU. With her knees and hands shaking, Lucy walked along the line of bassinets, the blue and pink blankets and the handwritten names on the fronts of the Plexiglas cribs.
Six babies lined the ward that day, and four of them were boys. Not until she reached the last baby in the row—a girl—did she know for sure. This was the baby, the one she and Aaron had prayed about and believed for and desperately wanted. Not just for the last five months.
For the last ten years.
Lucy stepped closer and looked at the tiny sleeping infant. She was perfect, her lips and cheeks and forehead more beautiful than any little baby’s ever had been. Lucy could hear her heart pounding with every breath.
God, is she ours? Is this our little girl? Please, can she be our little girl?
And then she saw something that gave her the greatest possible hope. The most incredible moment in this journey. Because this baby wasn’t just Elise’s child or a nameless infant in limbo while her birth mother decided what to do. This baby had a name. The one written over her tiny crib.
Gracie Anne.
• • •
ELISE WAS ALONE in the hospital room for now. She was leaving soon. Cole had already gone to get the car. And so she had done something she was advised not to do. Not in cases of adoption. She had asked her nurse to get her baby girl for her.
One last time.
The woman was older, wisdom shone in her eyes. She hesitated at Elise’s request. “Are you sure, honey?”
Every warning from Mr. Green came back to her. Remember the reason you signed the papers, Elise. Don’t put yourself through unnecessary pain, unless you are doubting your decision.
She didn’t care. Her smile came as easily as her next words. “Yes. I’m sure.”
Sunshine streamed through the window and Elise lifted her eyes to the sliver of blue sky between the hospital buildings. She was sure about placing her baby with Aaron and Lucy. It was the right thing to do for all of them. She’d already gotten student loans lined up for NYU.
But right here, right now, the baby was still hers. And she wasn’t going to leave without a proper goodbye. It was why she had sent Cole ahead. She didn’t want him to be here for this. Cole wasn’t the father of her baby. It had been wrong for her ever to pretend that was the case.
This newborn was hers alone. At least for another fifteen minutes.
The nurse returned with Elise’s baby girl, sleeping in a small crib on wheels. She pulled it up next to Elise. “Here she is.”
“Thank you.” Elise was still very sore, but she was showered and dressed, sitting in the chair beside her hospital bed. “Would you please hand her to me?” She looked at the nurse. “And then could you give us a few minutes?”
Again the woman hesitated, but she did as Elise asked. She picked up the baby, swaddled in a white and pink hospital blanket, and she gently transferred her to Elise’s arms. “I’ll check on you in a bit.”
“Okay.” Elise nodded, but she wasn’t listening. She was lost in the beauty of her firstborn, her tiny baby girl. When it was just the two of them, Elise nuzzled her face against the infant’s. “I didn’t have a plan for you, Gracie Anne.” She kissed the child’s cheek. “But God did.” Tears must’ve filled her eyes because one fell on her baby’s face. Elise dabbed it with the tip of her finger. “Yes, sweetie. God most certainly did.”
She had read about newborns. Usually they slept most of the first few weeks, only opening their eyes in rare moments. But maybe be
cause of the sound of her voice or the tear that had fallen on her baby face, Gracie Anne opened her eyes.
Opened them and looked right at Elise.
“Hello, there.” Elise felt an ocean of pain building in her heart and throat. “I’m your mama, baby. I love you.”
Gracie Anne blinked a few times. Maybe it was just Elise’s desperate imagination, but for a few seconds her baby looked straight to Elise’s heart. To the very center of her. As if to say she understood what was about to happen and she’d be fine with Aaron and Lucy. Better than fine. And that right here, while they still had the chance, she wanted Elise to know it was okay. That she would always love her for making this decision.
All of that seemed to come from the newborn in the time it took Elise to breathe. And in that same instant Elise noticed something. How natural it felt to hold her baby. This was her baby, a part of her. She always would be.
“Your grandma wanted to be here, baby girl. She loves you, too.” In the end she had decided it was best for her mom to stay back in Louisiana. If Elise changed her mind and kept the baby, her mother would see the child soon enough. If not, there was no point, no reason for her mom to be part of the heartache of this goodbye.
So she had done what Elise asked and stayed home. Elise was still looking into her baby girl’s face, still taking in her soft newborn smell. Still feeling the gentle rise and fall of her tiny chest with every breath.
“Jesus loves you, Gracie Anne. Remember that.” A soft sob caught in her throat. “And no one’s ever going to hurt you.”
Suddenly she knew just what she wanted to do. She opened her lips and began to sing. The same song her mama had sung to her. The one she carried with her even in her darkest days. And like her mother had done so many years ago, she changed the words just slightly. So that the song was directed straight to her baby girl. “Jesus loves you, this I know . . . for the Bible tells me so.”
Another tear fell on her little girl’s cheek. “Yes, Jesus loves you . . .”
Two Weeks: A Novel (The Baxter Family) Page 23