Sweet Agony

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Sweet Agony Page 22

by Christy Pastore


  I point my fork at her. “Tyler, he’s got the lock on the charitable giving, for sure.”

  She nods. “So, back to the matter of your job as school secretary.”

  “Yeah, I mean, I still have bills to pay. The money will be nice when everything gets worked out, whenever that happens.”

  “How’s Brant doing?” she asks.

  I lift a shoulder. “He’s been really quiet about work. I’ve tried to talk to him, but he keeps it all surface level. I told him to keep my money and let me invest in Rosemary Distillery.”

  Her blue eyes pop wide. “What did he say?”

  I incline my head to her. “What do you think? Turned me down flat.”

  A laugh bubbles up from her throat. “Yep, that sounds like my cousin.”

  Chrissy appears behind the bar. “How are the appetizers, ladies?”

  “Wonderful as always,” I tell her.

  “Good to know. You want to pick up a shift or two next week?”

  “Can’t. I promised Theresa, our librarian, that I’d help her put the library back together before school starts. The new space looks amazing.”

  “Well, anytime you want on the schedule, you just let me know.”

  “I will.”

  Chrissy refills our wine glasses and then hands us our bill.

  Maybelle laughs and taps her finger to the table. “So, you are going back to school.”

  “Yeah, I don’t really have any plans.”

  Moving forward has been hard. Ma’s not here. Joseph’s in Florida with her and Ted. Brant’s been working day and night trying to keep the business afloat. The tourist season took a bit of a beating. To make matters worse one of their warehouses collapsed in June. Tons of barrels of bourbon wiped out in minutes.

  The media’s having a field day with the story. Some customers feel duped and refuse to buy Cardwell Bourbon. Outside Lexington there was a bourbon burning in honor of my great-grandfather. An online website urged people to meet up and burn the liquor.

  Fair weather drinkers, in my opinion.

  I have no doubt that Brant and the company will come out on top of this crisis and be back to number one in no time.

  “You need some plans, Caroline. Why don’t you keep your family’s house and turn it into a bed and breakfast?”

  The right offer hasn’t come along for the farm and land. Ma pulled the property off the market two weeks ago. I think selling our family home has been harder than she originally thought.

  I cock a brow. “Because I don’t want to, honestly, it’s not my dream.”

  She leans forward. “What is your dream?”

  I think about my athletic apparel line. That was my dream. Is it still? Things are so messy and complicated. It all feels like I’m in limbo. Can I really do it? Manage my own business? It seemed easy when I did it with Ma, because it was the two of us.

  Bits and pieces of Ma’s words come back to my mind. “You do all the heavy lifting. You can do this job in your sleep.”

  “Honestly, I’ve got some time to think about it,” I tell her and take a sip of wine.

  “Speaking of time,” Maybelle drawls out. “When do you think you and Brant will make things official?”

  “Make what official?”

  She sets her wine glass down and leans into me. “Girl, you are in love. It’s written all over your face. I saw that same dreamy look in Haven’s eyes.”

  I laugh. “You’re in love, so you want everyone around you to be in love too.”

  “We haven’t said the words to each other yet.”

  “Well, what are you waiting for? Tell that man you love him.”

  Everything about Brant is wonderful. I feel like I know him down to his soul. But these last months have been hard on him. We went from being a super intense couple to two ships passing in the night.

  We have the occasional date night. But mostly, it’s been about the business and I totally get it. There’s a lot on his shoulders. He risked a lot. At the time, I don’t know that we fully realized the impact of his decision.

  “No regrets, not one,” Brant says.

  Maybelle and I finish our appetizers and wine while talking about her plans for the wedding and how things are going at The Tea Room.

  We walk out of the restaurant together. The humid August air hits me smack in the face.

  “You want to hit up yoga tomorrow morning?” she asks, as we trek up the sidewalk.

  “Sounds good to me.”

  The sun shines bright in the sky. Although, these days are coming to an end soon because the sun will set about this time in a few weeks. My eyes flick over to a building with a “For Rent” sign hanging in the window.

  “What used to be here,” I ask motioning to the window and Maybelle’s eyes sweep up and around.

  “Oh, this was that whimsy little shop with the homemade candles, jewelry, and knitwear. I think her mom got sick and she had to move to Wisconsin.”

  My finger taps my bottom lip. “It’s a cute space. Lots of light and windows are great for fixtures.”

  Maybelle shakes her head. “What are you thinking?”

  “How’s your downtown Tea Room location doing?”

  “Surprisingly well,” she tells me. “I see a lot of foot traffic too.”

  “I’ve got a dream. But I’m not sure that I can really do it.”

  She steps toward me. “Tell me more.”

  I loop my arm with hers and drag her back to Thistle & Rye. “I have an amazing thought and I can’t believe it just hit me.”

  We walk back into the bar area and I grab a pad of paper and pen from behind the bar.

  “Earlier you mentioned the inn, turning my family’s place into the bed and breakfast or whatever. What if you bought it?” I pull up the screen shot I took of the listing before Ma pulled it and show it to Maybelle.

  She’s quiet for a moment. Pensive even. Is she actually entertaining my idea?

  Maybelle blows out a deep breath. “It’s a hell of a thought. Right away I want to say yes. But I should to talk to my accountant to be sure that I can make it all happen. Yes. Let’s do it.”

  “Really?” I hear the shock in my voice.

  She laughs a throaty laugh. “Caroline, it’s a great idea! And you know that I’d take wonderful care of your family’s estate. I’m going to email my accountant, lemme get a report.”

  We order a bottle of wine and share a cookies and cream blondie as we talk through best- and worst-case scenarios. Maybelle frowns when she hears from her accountant.

  “There’s gotta be a way to work this out,” I tell her.

  I call Ma and she tells me that selling to Maybelle is the preferred option. But with Maybelle’s current cash situation, we decide that a partnership may be the way to go.

  “But I want to be a mostly silent partner,” Ma’s voice drifts over the speaker phone. “I don’t care what you do, Maybelle. And then once you can buy me out, the place is all yours.”

  “Perfect. I’ll get my lawyer working on the contract. I won’t let you down, ma’am.”

  Ma laughs. “I know that you won’t, dear.”

  We hang up with Ma and I stuff my phone back inside my clutch.

  “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

  “Yep, anything,” she says.

  “Can I keep my place at the tack house?”

  She nods and hugs me. “Of course you can. For as long as you want.”

  “Good, thanks.” I feel like a giant weight lifts off my chest.

  “I know it sounds silly,” Maybelle says, “but I feel like I’ll be fulfilling my daddy’s dream.”

  “It’s not silly. Not at all,” I say softly. “To be honest, I think Ma is relieved to know that the house that my daddy grew up in won’t be left in a stranger’s hands.”

  Maybelle swallows down some wine. “Okay, so tell me your dream for that little shop up the street.”

  “Well, in college,” I begin and then launch into my idea. I tell her all about my
designs and what I’d like to do for fitness apparel.

  An hour later, Maybelle and I part ways and I’m feeling really good about my plans. Maybelle’s insanely supportive. I only hope Brant will be too.

  Brant

  Caroline came to my apartment tonight all smiles and full of excitement. It’s the refreshing breath of hope I need.

  She tells me all about her idea for the boutique and what she and Maybelle talked about over their happy hour get together.

  “Thanks for listening to me ramble on about my idea. I know it might feel like a sting since my future plans are at a cost to—”

  I wave a hand in front of me cutting her off. “No, Caroline. I love hearing you so excited. I think it’s a wonderful idea and a great plan. The fact that you want to build a business on your own and be a part of the community—it’s amazing.”

  She sighs. “Are you sure?”

  I pull her onto my lap. “I love you and nothing makes me happier than seeing you happy. I’ve been so preoccupied these last months. Thank you for sharing this with me.”

  Her eyes well with tears.

  Oh shit.

  “What? Caroline, please don’t cry.”

  Her hands frame my face. “Do you realize what you just said?”

  I shrug. “Uhm, I’m hoping it was something supportive?”

  She laughs. It’s the greatest sound. “You just said that you love me!” Caroline slaps my chest.

  “Well, I do,” I tell her.

  “You’ve never . . . we’ve not said those words yet.”

  Crap.

  This is a big thing. A huge moment.

  I kiss her and my heart pounds in my chest. “I love you, Caroline. I’d be a fool not to.”

  She nods, her smile is radiant. Her blue eyes are bright and her skin flushes with happiness. Caroline’s gorgeous and sexy and I ache for her.

  “I love you too,” she whispers against my lips.

  A loud howl comes from the room. Julep stands inches from us howling and wagging her tail.

  “We love you too, Julep,” I tell her as I scratch behind her ears.

  Later, that night I fall asleep with Caroline in my arms and Julep at our feet. It’s bliss.

  All the tension that I’ve been feeling melts away.

  I know that I made the right decision in giving Caroline and all the living members of her father’s family the settlement.

  I’m still stressed out, but I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Like I can handle all that’s going on with purpose and move forward. I’m filled with vigor and renewal. I don’t know how to explain it, but ideas are swirling in my head. For the first time in months, I’m thinking more clearly.

  The fog lifts.

  Everything swirls inside my chest all at once. Hope and excitement.

  A challenge. I love a challenge and I’ve forgotten that—until now.

  I’m back, baby!

  I want to jump out of bed and jot down all my thoughts and ideas. But one look at Caroline in my arms and I consider never leaving this bed again.

  Even if the company fails, she’s my future.

  She is my future.

  Brant

  Valentine’s Day

  Once again, I find myself sitting on the sofa in front of the television asking, “Where the fuck did the time go?”

  My heart drops into my stomach when I hear Caroline puking her guts up again in the bathroom.

  An uncorked bottle of wine and two empty glasses glare at me from the counter. Poor thing has been sick for days. She can’t keep anything down. Not even crackers or broth.

  Personally, I think she’s working too hard at the store. My fingers fly over the screen of my phone. I walk down the hallway to the bathroom. “You know you’ve had this flu long enough, let me take you to The Little Clinic in Kroger. I just looked, they’re open until nine.”

  “Don’t open that door,” she shouts before heaving and coughing.

  “Sugar, I’m going to carry you caveman style if you don’t get yourself out here.”

  She laughs and then the toilet flushes. The faucet turns on and I hear her crying. Panic ensues as I fear that it could be more than the flu. My mind thinks about Royston and whizzes all over when I think back to her telling me about her family’s health history.

  Worry is heavy in my chest. “I’m coming in,” I warn.

  “I feel terrible,” she says through choked sobs.

  I rub her shoulders and she winces. “Every part of me aches, Brant. Even my boobs hurt.”

  “You’re going to the doctor, right now.”

  I bundle her up in a coat and help her with her boots. Once I get her into my car, I take a cleansing breath.

  She’s going to be okay. It’ll be okay.

  My feet tap against the floor tiles as I wait for Caroline to come out of the little room. I haven’t seen her since the physician escorted her to the bathroom.

  A woman across from me gives me a tiny smile. “What a way to spend Valentine’s Day, huh?”

  My hands wring together. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

  “The store will be closing in thirty minutes. Please gather your final purchases and make your way to the checkout.”

  My eyes squeeze shut and my palms break out in a cold sweat. Fuck. I hope I don’t have whatever Caroline has.

  A door opens and Caroline appears with a large white bag in one hand. She looks like she might vomit again.

  I stand and walk toward her. “You okay?”

  Her eyes move to my chest and then back up to my eyes. My heart takes a dip and then thumps wildly.

  “Come on, let’s go,” she says softly.

  She strides quickly through the store. Caroline grabs a red basket and loads it up with herbal tea, crackers and, to my surprise, a container of cupcakes from the bakery.

  She turns to face me. “You want anything? I’m buying.”

  I stare at her for a moment. Confusion swirls in my chest. “Caroline, are you okay?”

  A laugh leaves her lips, and she looks at me with tears in her eyes. “I’m pregnant.”

  My heart trips up and collides with my ribs. For a moment my eyes see spots. A buzzing sound hums in my ears and I’m not sure that I heard what she said.

  “Wait, did you just say that you’re pregnant?”

  “Yeah, congratulations, you’re gonna be a daddy.”

  “Caroline,” I whisper. “Are you okay?”

  She shakes her head. “I think I’m in shock.”

  “You shouldn’t have had to be in there alone,” I tell her and pull her closer to me. “What do you want? What do you need?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t understand how this happened.” Her body shakes as fat tears stream down her cheeks.

  I run a hand through my hair. My eyes swing around the bakery. “Let’s pay for these things and get out of here.”

  “Okay,” she mumbles.

  I take the basket from her and tuck her under my other arm.

  Caroline’s carrying my baby. How did this happen? Well, I know how it happened, I’m just confused as to what went awry. But it doesn’t matter. None of it matters.

  I steer her in the direction of the self-checkout, scan and pay for our items and then we walk outside. A breeze whips up through the air as snow falls all around us.

  “I’m sorry, Brant. I’m so sorry this happened.”

  We stop in front of my car. “Hey, hey, I’m not sorry. I think you and I will be great parents.”

  “I’m scared. I’ve never been this scared.”

  “How about this,” I say as I open the passenger door. “You set up your appointment with your OB-GYN and I’ll go with you. We’re doing this together.”

  She blinks up at me. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

  I open the back door and set the bags on the seat. “Yeah, I’m sure,” I admit.

  “You aren’t nervous?”

  “Nervous? Hell, yes. Look, I know we didn’t plan this and
you have your reservations, but I’m happy.” My heart pounds in my chest. “Please let me be a father to this baby—in all the ways I can. I want this baby.”

  Caroline’s hands frame my face. “I love you, Brantley Cardwell. I think you’re going to be a wonderful daddy. I only hope I’m a good mom.”

  My throat tightens. It hurts to hear Caroline doubt herself.

  “You’re going to be a great mom,” I assure her. “Will we screw some stuff up? Yeah, sure. But we have each other. I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, sugar.”

  Finally, a ghost of a smile crosses her lips. A deep breath leaves her body. “Okay, let’s do it, baby daddy.”

  My mouth fuses to hers. She moans into my mouth as I deepen our kiss.

  Caroline pushes back. “Sorry, it hurts to kiss you. Not kissing you, but you know what I mean, my lips hurt.”

  I laugh. “Let’s get you home and into bed so that we can get you feeling better.”

  We settle into my car and my hands grips hers as we drive back to my apartment.

  “What’s in the bag?”

  “Lots of reading material, childbirth classes, information on breastfeeding. I can’t have fish. Fine by me, but not eating sushi . . . that one hurts. Vitamins. Exercises. They even tossed in coupons for diapers, wipes, and all this baby stuff. It’s a lot.”

  My head spins but in a good way.

  “Guess we’ll be having lots of carbs?” I joke.

  “Why do you think I got cupcakes?”

  We pull up into my parking spot and I turn off the engine. “Hey, look at me.”

  Her blue eyes shine, wet from tears.

  “Those better be happy tears.”

  She smiles. “How about ‘I’m scared shitless, but with you by my side I think I can do this’ tears.”

  “I’ll take it. It’s going to be okay, better than okay. You and our kid will never be alone—not as long as I’m breathing.”

  And then she cracks. “That’s what I’m afraid of, Brant.”

  “There’s no need to be afraid.” I pull her close to reassure her.

  My lips touch her forehead. I hold her cheeks in my hands and then I remember that she’s in pain.

  “Put them back,” she whispers. “Put your hands on me.”

  And I do.

 

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