Flicker and Flame: Magic Bound Book One

by Willow Hayes

  I’m stunned when Kenna questions whether we hate her. How could she ever believe anyone could hate her? Teo lifts her gaze to us, and I see the terror flood her eyes. She was not ready to share with all of us, but we will make sure she does not regret that she did, albeit unknowingly. As the three of us step into the room I move to kneel in front of her. Her face shows the weight she has carried around inside her, and I want very much to take that burden from her. I reach out to cup her cheek and tell her, “I could never hate you, Firefly, and not because you are my Queen and I am your Chosen, but because you have done nothing worthy of hate.” I lean forward and place a kiss on her forehead, needing to reassure her that she is still precious to me, to us. I step back and each of her Chosen in turn tell her in their own way that she is cherished and she is ours.

  After Teo shares with her Kenna blinks rapidly up at him before she shocks us all and kisses him. She kisses with such passion that I can almost hear the silent plea, to show her that she is not what she thought she was all these years. The air is scented with her arousal, and we all start shifting restlessly. I don’t want to alarm her, so I try to kill the groan that begs to be released.

  I need to hold her, to feel her skin, to taste her. My need for her has only grown since the moment I first laid eyes on her at the club. Luka coughs, and Kenna’s eyes fly up. Her eyes widen in panic and embarrassment, and in true Kenna fashion, she uses humor to deflect.

  Teo reassures her that we have shared women before, and Kenna looks as though she doesn’t know how to process the idea. What he says is the truth though, we have shared women before and frankly we enjoy it, but Kenna is different. That’s not to say we wouldn’t enjoy sharing her because we absolutely would. Fuck, the mere thought of a few of us showing her just how unbelievably sexy she is has my blood heating. With Kenna though, it isn’t just sex, and it never would be. She deserves the world. She deserves more than this consummate bachelor, but I don’t know how much longer I can fight this pull she has on me. And if I know my brothers they feel the same way. I’ve kept my distance from Kenna in an attempt to focus on the mission of keeping her safe, and frankly after what we heard tonight I don’t know if she can handle my appetites. But I meant what I said to her, I’ll take her any way I can have her. As she drifts off to sleep on Teo’s lap I gesture for the remaining Chosen to follow me. I look at Teo, and he nods. He will join us after he gets her settled.

  Shifting thoughts I begin planning what we need to do to make this fucker pay. Once Teo joins us I round on him, “Why the fuck didn’t you tell us how bad her nightmares were?” I know it’s not fair to lash out at him, but my rage feels impotent without knowing who the bastard is.

  Teo stands his ground and responds, “I told you she was still having nightmares. You saw how bad they were the first night. I didn’t know, until tonight, that they had gotten so much worse. She had come to me a few times but stopped some nights ago. I’d hoped giving her time and proving that we are worthy of her trust would help her to open up, but she remained closed off. Of course, after hearing what she had to say tonight it’s no wonder she was terrified of telling her story.”

  I’ve always been able to maintain my calm through any disaster. It’s what makes me a good leader and a damn good assassin, but in my agitation I find myself pacing instead of standing still. “First off let’s deal with what we do for Kenna now that we know then we’ll discuss hunting down and ending that piece of shit.”

  “She’ll resent us if we coddle her, so in some ways we need to go on with business as usual. She might have accepted our word tonight, but her ghosts will be back tomorrow or sometime soon,” Luka says while he tosses his knife in the air to let it spin before catching it.

  Callum’s voice is rough with emotion when he says, “She needs to feel powerful. We know she has power, but I think her magic scares her.” When I look at the Fae his face is hardened with more determination and emotion than I have ever seen in all the years I’ve known him. “I believe she is still bound, not because she needs more time, but because she is frightened of her magic. She will take a punch without backing down, but she does not know what a ‘punch’ from magic feels like yet. I will try to figure out how to help her with this.” His idea has merit, and I nod in agreement.

  “Okay, so we keep the same schedule for now. Callum will come up with a plan for her magic. And let’s all give some thought on how to show her she has not lost us.” I vow to spend every day making sure she knows how precious she is to me. To us.

  As my thoughts shift to hunting down the piece of trash my body floods with rage. “Now let’s figure out how to find the fucker,” my voice full of venom and hatred for the monster who hurt our little firefly. The one who is stealing the life bit by bit out of our woman.

  “I can hack the foster system records and see what I can find,” Luka’s eyes are full of the same hatred though he doesn’t take his eyes off the knife he is still tossing as he mentions his contribution.

  “Someone, likely Teo, needs to see if she will share any more details that will help us narrow the search, but I do not think it wise to plan on getting anything else from her,” Callum adds.

  “Alright, so it’s business as usual except to make her see how powerful she can be and how precious she is to us, and Luka is going to hunt the bastard down. Until we have more information this will have to be enough. I think it might be beneficial for us to do a few sparring rounds together. The last time I got this pissed off I had to patch up the wall before she woke up. We all have a lot of pent up rage with nowhere to direct it, and I don’t want it coming out on Kenna,” I sum up our plan and hate that we have so little to go on, but we will hunt him down.

  Thirty-Nine

  Kenna

  I open my eyes and am confused as to why they feel puffy and scratchy until last night comes back to me in a rush. Fuck. Did I really tell them? How are they not disgusted by what I let him do to me, and what I let happen to Callie? Or maybe they’ve changed their minds about me? Will they ask me to leave? I start to feel the panic build and try to calm myself down.

  Then there’s a knock at the door, and Teo asks if he can come in. I inwardly groan because I am so not ready to face him. I won’t be able to take it if I see disgust in his eyes. I try to think through what I should say when he calls through the door again, “Spitfire, I can smell your fear, and I can almost hear all the overthinking you’re doing in that pretty little head. Can I please come in?”

  Closing my eyes on a groan I take a deep breath and call out for him to enter. I keep my eyes firmly closed because I can’t bring myself to open them yet, afraid of what I’ll find. The bed sinks next to me, and Akito nudges my leg, and I can almost hear him telling me that I need to face this.

  I sigh again, wishing I didn’t look as though I rolled around in dog shit, and open my eyes. Teo always patiently waits until I make eye contact, which I find both maddening and hot as fuck. So I lift my eyes and simply see Teo. His eyes are warm with a smidgen of humor dancing in the depths. “There you are, Spitfire. You slept late. I’m glad you slept well, but it’s almost lunch time.” He grins at me as if he caught me being naughty by sleeping till noon.

  I punch his arm. “You let me sleep till lunch?” my voice still rough with sleep and emotion but trying to be playful.

  He feigns the hurt from my punch. “Well I didn’t want you going off on poor Callum again. I’m sure you hurt his feelings, that is if he has any.” He winks at me before continuing, “So I thought some beauty sleep was in order. Although you may need to go back to sleep because your hair looks like rats moved in overnight.” He dances away from my second punch laughing.

  I roll my eyes at him, but his lightheartedness is a balm to my battered heart. “Alright you, point taken thank you very much.” I wave my finger at him. “I’m up, I’m up.”

  That’s when it hits me that for the first time in years I slept all the way through the night without a nightmare. My eyes widen with surpris
e and shoot to Teo’s. “I didn’t have a nightmare!” I can’t contain my joy at the fact. I want to believe that by sharing I’ve shaken off the nightmares for good, but I won’t allow myself the hope. I will, however, enjoy this milestone. I jump out of bed and throw myself at Teo laughing. He chuckles and wraps his arms around me, spinning me around. I laugh at the sensation and my victory.

  He buries his nose in my neck and allows my body to slide down his, and I’m thrown back to our kiss last night. When my feet touch the ground his hands stay on my hips, and he nuzzles my neck. “I love the way you smell. You smell of neroli on the breeze of a summer wind.” My hands wind up into his hair, and my breathing hitches when he places a kiss on my neck. He straightens, and I see the wolf flash in his eyes, and for a moment I think he’s going to kiss me, but he only holds me. “I am so glad you had a night without nightmares my beautiful little Spitfire, and while I would love to kiss you crazy right now, Callum might horribly maim me if I don’t get you to lunch on time.” Then he grins, kisses the tip of my nose, spins me toward the bathroom, and smacks my ass. “So hop to it. I’m too pretty to be maimed.” He darts out the door laughing at the squeak I made when he smacked my ass.

  I tell Callum how delicious lunch was and insist he teach me how to make the dish, making his lip twitch as he gives me a non-committal sound. I ask him what the plan is for today, and he only directs me to meet him outside before walking away. I smile at his typical Callum abruptness. It used to fluster me, but now I’ve realized that that is just Callum, and I like the Callum I see. It doesn’t hurt that he is yummy to look at, but I’ve also seen glimpses under his hard exterior, and the man has a heart of gold. He would tell me I was full of shit, but I know I’m right.

  I make my way to the training area, wondering what we’ll be doing and feeling nervous about what to expect given my confession last night. My magic hasn’t exactly been cooperative, and that freaking jar is still keeping most of it locked up. To mask the ongoing anxiety about last night, I try for casual when I ask, “So what are we going to try today?”

  Callum sits down on the edge of the training platform and motions for me to sit next to him. I freeze. Is Callum going to reject me? Tell me he won’t train me? “It is alright, Ómorfo, nothing is wrong. Please come and sit with me.”

  Again the beautiful foreign word rolls off his lips, and I wonder what it means. I slowly move to sit down and angle my body towards him. “Last night,” shit, so we are going to talk about last night? My heart starts to race, but he continues, “you demonstrated an immeasurable amount of courage to share something that scares you so greatly.” This is not going where I thought it was. “I have been thinking about your magic in relation to your feelings, and I believe there may be a connection. I believe it may be why your magic has been dormant the past few weeks. I would like to ask you a few questions, and I hope you will answer them because I think it will help you, but I will not force you. Are you willing to try that?” I slowly nod my head, though he starts off with a whopper of a question, “How did you feel when they moved you from one home to another?”

  Default don’t get too close Kenna’s response would have been to say I was fine, that it didn’t bother me, but I truly do want to unbind my magic, so I take the risk and answer truthfully, “I felt fear. I didn’t know what the new place was going to be like, and eventually I just assumed they were all the same.”

  “What about when he touched you for the first time?”

  My breathing picks up, but I push through to answer, “Fear then too.”

  “Only three more, Kenna. I know this is difficult. When he threatened Callie what did you feel?” His intense eyes are full of emotions I can’t process right now, so I look away.

  “Terror.”

  “When those men came to the restaurant to take Rya and you what did you feel?”

  “Terror when I realized there was nothing I could do.” I can’t see where this is going, but he said just one more question, so I grit my teeth and get ready for the last one.

  “I want you to think through your answer to this question. Do not give me a gut reaction answer, and do not worry about what I may think of your answer.” I slowly nod, agreeing to think about it. “What emotion do you feel the strongest when you think of your magic?”

  I want to say excitement because I know I should be excited, and I do feel some excitement, but it’s not the emotion I feel the strongest. I think of everything that has happened since I marked my Chosen, and how much my whole world has changed, and how overwhelmed I feel. But I think I know what I feel the most and understand Callum’s questions now. “Fear. I feel fear, but I don’t want to. I don’t know how to not feel it or what to do about it though.” I gesture helplessly.

  “I thought you might say that. May I ask you a couple more?” he entreats, and I nod again. “Why did you start learning how to fight?”

  That was an easy answer. “Because I never wanted to feel powerless again, and fighting made me feel powerful.”

  “And were you afraid when you began your journey to become a fighter?”

  “Absolutely terrified.”

  “How were you able to get past the fear and do it regardless?”

  I shudder at the strong emotions rolling through me. “I would picture Callie and repeat my promise to never feel powerless again,” I say firmly and continue, “I was in an extremely dark place when I started at the gym. I knew I wanted to get strong, but I had no idea how to do it. Reg saw that in me and helped me become strong, and to feel confidence in my strength.”

  “I would say you are roughly in the same place as you were the day you walked into that gym. You were terrified when you began, and yet you had a mentor, and a promise you made to help guide you. Here we are today, you are scared of your magic, and all it can do. You have walked into the ‘gym,’ and you have a mentor who wants to help you keep a promise you made to the new you. What are you going to do with that fear? Will you stay on the outside looking in, or will you silence the fear and allow your mentor to help guide you, so you never have to feel powerless again?” He speaks with an intense passion held just below the surface.

  With his words the tears started falling. Never in a million years would I have made the connection he did, but it’s clear as day now that he has pointed it out. I’ve allowed myself to be an outsider looking in on this new world of magic. When the answer was on the other side of the door, and all I had to do was open it.

  Callum, while an intense taskmaster sometimes, has been patient, rarely showing any frustration with me. Thinking this through, I begin to see so much of Reg in Callum, and the thought brings another wave of emotions. He sits patiently, letting me work through the waves of realization that crash one after the other. I take a deep breath and make the same promise I made walking into the gym, “I will never allow myself to feel powerless again, and I will not let fear stand in my way. So what do I need to do?”

  He nods once, and I can feel his pride in the small movement. “Get up onto the platform and stand in the middle. Close your eyes and look for your magic deep inside.” I follow his instructions and see my magic waiting for me, which makes me smile because I’ve felt so distant from my magic the past few weeks. “I want you to try something. It may not work, but it is worth a try. I want you to envision the jar broken into pieces.”

  I nod and start talking to my magic. Alright magic, let’s see if we can work together a bit shall we? I imagine the jar in pieces. I imagine the lid broken off. I sigh and open my eyes. “It’s not working. I envisioned the jar broken, but it is not responding.” I shrug my shoulder and wait for his next direction.

  “Try this, instead of picturing it already broken imagine yourself breaking it. Imagine the jar as your fear.”

  The intensity of his gaze is a bit heady, and I find myself lost for a moment, so I clear my throat, ignoring the awkwardness and close my eyes to try again. Let’s hope this works. I promise I won’t let my fear come between us aga
in, okay? I’m going to break the jar. When nothing happens I try again and frustration bleeds through into the words. Alright magic, let’s stage a jailbreak! We are going to break this jar.

  As soon as I finish saying the word jar, it doesn’t just break, it shatters. My magic rushes out in an overwhelming wave, and I scream as it blasts me back. I open my eyes only to be confronted with red and green sparks and rays of bright white running along my skin. It doesn’t burn like fire, but it still hurts like hellfire. It’s as though there is suddenly too much of everything inside of me, and I can no longer contain it all. I find Callum’s eyes and plead without words for his help. My magic acts of its own accord and creates a protective wall around me, preventing him from getting close.

  He shouts over the noise my magic is making, “Close your eyes and talk to your magic, Kenna. Remember it is a part of you. It has experienced everything you have!”

  I growl in frustration because that’s the last thing I can focus on right now. I close my eyes and try to breathe and talk to my magic. Listen, I know you’ve been cooped up for far too long, and I really am sorry about that, but if I promise you will never have to be bound again will you tone it down? This really hurts, and honestly, you have me scared. At my words I can feel my magic slowly receding. Just before sinking all the way back I feel the caress of an apology. Thank you.

  When I look again at the place where my magic resides my red and green threads have been joined by a bright, almost blinding thread of white I’ve not seen before. I take a ragged breath then another until I feel like I can open my eyes again to tell Callum what I saw, but when I do I see the unexpected sight of all my guys surrounding me and staring in amazement.