by McCoy, Sky
Standing at the door, I reached over to the hook for my robe in the small foyer, and shrugged my arms through the sleeves. I looked through the peephole to see if he was still there and took the security chain off, and there was Robert standing in front of me.
My heart hammered in my chest and my face flushed. I wished he hadn’t seen the anticipation in my eyes, the desperation covering my face, but I couldn’t hide what I felt for him.
He’d been my Daddy since I was sixteen and he was all I knew and wanted in a man. I’d been with him since he came to one of the dance recitals, scouting for young dancers to fill his all male ballet company.
By the time I met Robert I’d won all kinds of awards and had plans to dance in a Broadway show, but my mother never had enough money to bring me to New York, and when Robert made her promises about me and gave her money. I was his.
My mother had fallen in love with a man, and wanted to be with him without a teenage boy by another man to restrict her, so she turned a blind eye to Robert who took her gay teenage son off her hands for a few dollars.
We stood in silence for a moment with our eyes locked. My voice broke, “Come in, Robert. I’m glad you came to see me. I’ve been so lonely,” I said as I snuggled under Robert’s arms, but his hands fell to his side with me holding him around his waist for dear life. He reached for my hands and pushed them down to my sides, then took a step back.
“It’s not what you think, Chase.” Terror flickered through my body and my eyes pleaded with him—don’t do this, now. Robert couldn’t hold my begging gaze and he lowered his eyes. I knew the time had come, and he would be breaking the news to me that I was no longer his boy as he’d said in the text. He was no longer my Daddy. I placed my thumb in my mouth and bit it over and over.
“Sit down, Chase,” Robert said in a firm voice, the kind of voice he’d kept for someone he wanted to rid himself of. I’d heard that sound and seen that steely look in his dark eyes many days when he’d fired a dancer and when I didn’t do well in a performance. He had spanked me many times when I danced badly, but it was never really a hard spanking, I thought. Just a prelude to our lovemaking.
Before today, I’d never seen this type of coldness in Robert’s eyes, because he’d never shown me that part of him—until now.
It was that bad.
“I have something to say.” Robert sat near me and glared at me. “I know we’ve been together and you’ve worked for my company, and you were the best principal dancer I had, but...”
“I wasn’t just a dancer to you. You were my Daddy and I was your boy. You made love to me. I’ve only had one man and that’s you, remember.” When I didn’t find the warmth from Robert’s eyes and body language, I leaned into him and he moved away from me, and then my voice turned unforgiving. “Don’t tell me you’re putting that boy in my spot. He’s not even as seasoned and accomplished as I am, but you’re going to do it anyway, because you’re fucking him. I’ve been with you too long for you to lie to me. The least you can do is tell me the truth,” I barked at Robert. I’d finally found my voice and it was no longer timid.
Robert put his head down and looked at his hands, or his shoes, I didn’t know which.
“Raise your head, you should be man enough to tell me the truth and look at me at the same time.” I reached for his face as he had done to me many nights when he wanted me to suck his needy cock.
“He said that if I didn’t give him your spot that he would leave me, and I love him, Chase... and no, I’m not fucking him.”
“Well you’re not as fucked up as I thought.” I was trembling, because I didn’t know I had the strength to talk to Robert that way, and he’d accepted it, but what could he do to me anymore? He’d committed the highest betrayal by leaving me alone in a world without protection. Turning to look into Robert’s eyes I said, “That boy’s barely of age and I assume a virgin. Remember when I was that age and a virgin? And now I’m twenty-one and you’re throwing me over for a child.”
Biting down on my lip, I tried to keep from crying. Not thinking, I reached for Robert and tried to be that young boy he’d nurtured.
“You’re too old, Chase.”
“Too old for what? To dance, or for you to fuck me?”
“Both.” And then Robert stood. “I’ll pay for the apartment for one month, but then you have to leave before the rent is due again. I’ll even pay for the fare back home to Seattle.”
“I don’t need you to pay for anything. I don’t want anything from you. I want the money you promised me for five years of working my ass off and letting you fuck me.”
“I never fucked you. I made love to you,” Robert said, as if there was a difference in what happened between us. He’d fucked me, I’d sucked his cock and danced for him. It appeared he’d gotten the better of the deal, because look what I had now—nothing and no one.
“I don’t know how to tell you, Chase, but I can’t pay you all that you expect.” I closed my eyes for a second, wishing this was all a dream and when I opened them, Robert was talking and I’d heard nothing.
“I need something for those five years, so don’t tell me that you didn’t make money because you were bankrupt before me. That Ballet Company was built around me,” I said, with a hoarse voice unable to control the contempt that spewed from my mouth.
“But the expenses were enormous.”
“What about your patrons? Because of me you had millions of dollars coming in from all over the world, New York and San Francisco alone brought in millions each season.”
“I didn’t pay attention to the books.” Robert glanced at me with a not so convincing argument. “Some of the money was stolen and the rest I had to pay the dancers...”
“Everyone except me, Robert, you paid everyone except me,” I barked at him.
“I took care of you, didn’t I?” Robert glared at me, trying to convince me to say what he wanted. Maybe it was so he could clear his conscience, or he could sleep well at night with his lover. I wasn’t about to give him what he wanted.
“You call this taking care of me? Look around. The last tenant left his soiled sofa that we’re sitting on now, and the mattress I’ve been lying on. I don’t want to think about that. I’ve been holed up in a seedy apartment waiting for you to come to me and tell me you’ve made a mistake, that I can be with you like we were before... but now I know that will never happen, because you’re living in an expensive hotel room with your new boy.”
“I’m sorry, Chase.” Robert passed his hand over my arm, but I pulled back, because I had to get out my frustrations before I could move on and get him out of my headspace.
“Fucking me, never giving me any money to make sure I had something when you decided that you didn’t want my ass anymore. Is that taking care of me? Did I ever mean anything to you?”
Robert leaned in to kiss me, but I put my hand on his chest. “You don’t get to do that to me anymore.” I stood. “It’s time for you to go.” I headed for the door and he followed behind me.
Turning around facing Robert, I took one look at the man I loved. For some reason, the man I thought I would love forever had managed to make me fall out of love with him in that one conversation. I didn’t think that was possible earlier when I had cried my heart out to Jami, but just like that, the beautiful feeling I thought I had for him had disappeared, which made me feel a little lighter and free from the hold he had once held over me.
When I stood at the door, my robe fell open, and before Robert left, he stood glaring down at my indifferent cock. That glow in his dark eyes made me know that he was having second thoughts about me. It must have been the familiar situation, and his lust for what I had to offer him at that moment. He must have weighed up the idea that he couldn’t touch that sixteen-year-old for another two years until he’d become an adult, and what was he going to do until then?
Robert wasn’t the type to hook up with anyone. He liked to nurture and teach a young man in order to benefit from his mentorship.
He knew with me he could spank me and fuck me, whenever he needed to get his frustrations out, and if he ordered me around I’d obey.
Then Robert did something I never thought he would—he sank to his knees in front of me and placed his fist on my cock as he looked up at me. I wanted the feel of him badly and I let him kiss the head of my cock. At that moment I had the power over him, but I didn’t know how to use it on Robert. I’d been the one going on my knees, sucking his cock, letting him fuck me as I crawled on all fours being his boy, so I didn’t recognize my power, and didn’t know what to do with it.
I opened my legs and he cupped my balls gently. Robert’s mouth split and he eased my cock down his throat with his other hand. Then he held on to my ass as I fisted his hair. My head fell back on my shoulders as I tightened my fist and pulled his head back, then slid my length from his open mouth. He looked up at me with a hungry glare, and sat on his heels with his mouth wide. I took my hard cock and shoved it in his mouth, and he took it all down his throat.
My eyes didn’t close, I wanted to remember this moment, because it was sublime as I drove my cock as far down his throat as possible, and he took it all in as if he’d been a pro at it. But I was the pro. He’d taught me how to suck cock early, and now I was good at it, but not good enough for him.
I fucked his mouth as my hips rocked forward, and bucked my hips hard until I felt my orgasm crashing through my spine, and the river of come I deposited into Robert’s mouth felt satisfying. He didn’t hesitate to swallow all of it as he looked up at me with satisfaction and a smile, as if he had changed my mind about him, and as if things would go back to normal.
There would never be a normal between me and Robert, because he’d destroyed our relationship, and showed me that I had power too.
Standing breathless, I looked at him after he rose from his knees. “Can I come back tonight?” He whispered, in a not so familiar submissive voice. With just that one act with my cock down his throat, the dynamics of our relationship had changed, but I didn’t want what we had before—or now.
“I don’t think it will work out. We need to be apart. Maybe it’s better that I go home to Seattle, or far away from your influence.”
Robert opened his mouth to speak, but I placed my finger over it. “Take your last look, Robert, because you will never have my body again. A body you made fit your cock.” I stepped from the doorway as he lowered his head and walked out the door, and I didn’t cry.
Before I could close the door, Robert had placed a foot through the threshold, stopping me, and he walked back inside.
“What’s wrong? Are you having second thoughts?” I asked with a chuckle.
“I want you to know that I’ll place something in your account so you can get a flight home. I promised your mother that I would see you safely home.”
“Yes. I’ve heard that many times... and you promised me a life with you, and money to take care of me. I got nothing but promises, I’ll look for it, but I won’t hold my breath.”
Robert stepped closer to me. The heat in his eyes glowed and he pushed the door shut behind him.
“Leave.” I tried to hide my breathless voice. “I don’t want you, or any of your money, so go. Just enough to get back to Seattle and what you can spare. That’s all.”
I walked around him and opened the door, then pushed him out before he could say anything, because after feeling my cock in his throat, I wanted more. If he had stayed any longer I might have done anything to get him back and have him fuck me again. At that moment, I couldn’t trust myself. I probably would have hung around just to be near him and let him fuck me until he could take possession of the young man.
Now that would have been fucked up—even for me.
That was just my pride talking and my youth when I said I didn’t want anything from Robert. I probably didn’t want anything, but I needed money, because you couldn’t live on love, especially in L. A. That’s where I was going to. L.A. to find Peter Rowen. If he was gay or straight or bisexual, I wanted to be in his bed one day, sucking his cock.
I had to find some way of supporting myself and I didn’t know if I could make it on my own without someone to direct my life, but I was determined to try. As I packed my few things, I couldn’t help but wonder if Peter would be my Daddy.
Chapter Five
Chase
I’d been in Los Angeles for a week before I realized how deprived I’d been while in New York. Here in L. A. there was sun and the ocean breeze to make me feel that I was alive. I lay back with my hands behind my head, feet propped up, listening to the waves crash, and I thought I had died, because I’d never felt this peaceful in my life.
Pulling myself up from the chair I’d been lying in for hours, I glanced around, taking in the sight of this beautiful home, and most of all the Pacific Ocean. I just stared at the ocean for hours.
It never occurred to me that some people lived like this in such opulent surroundings. I never even thought about it, because I never had the time to think, just did. Just danced and danced some more, never having time for much else, living in hotel rooms with Robert, and rarely having the desire or strength to leave the rooms we’d lived in as we traveled from one country to the next.
Passing my hand along the railing, I peered down at the sand, seeing people walking their dogs early as they strode down the stairs after seeing me wave. The people waving back must have thought this was mine, but the home belonged to Jami and Max.
It was enormous and open, with floor to ceiling panoramic windows, and inside the home was decorated with beautiful muted colors of browns, with yellow couches and modern expensive furniture and rugs covering the flooring. On the walls was modern art and I recognized some of Andy Warhol’s work.
Spending my time in hotel rooms and hovels throughout Europe hadn’t prepared me for this lifestyle, and when it was time to relinquish it, I didn’t know if I could give it up. But I had to, because I couldn’t afford to live like this. The little money I’d gotten from Robert was only enough to pay for a few months, and that was only food and maybe gas if I owned a car, which I didn’t. Therefore, I couldn’t afford to sit on my ass and not look for employment of some kind.
Jami had said that my house-sitting wouldn’t last long, because Max wanted to sell the place, so there will come a time where I would have to leave. However, Jami said to me that he would try to delay it for as long as I needed a place to crash.
I didn’t want to cause trouble between Max and Jami, so I gave Jami a timeline of when I could afford to leave—and that was a lie.
The sun was setting and then I’d take off running and go swimming. It appeared that these expensive homes rich people bought along the beach were mostly vacant, but I would get the best use out of this one before I had to get back to reality and live like a peasant again, but this time without a Daddy to take care of me.
After relaxing a bit, I sat and watched the sun set, and then it was time. I wasn’t certain if I should wear jogging shoes, and since I hadn’t packed any or owned some, I decided on bare feet, because my feet were beyond feeling much pain. Even if I stepped on a sea shell I wouldn’t notice, because of all the early dancing I’d done in my life.
Taking the stairs down to the sand, I’d decided not to listen to any music. This was a new experience for me. I wanted to run and hear the sound of the waves and feel the ocean air on my face. When I reached the sand I began my slog, going slow at first, and then I took off meeting other joggers going the opposite way. Maybe they knew something I didn’t, but of course they did. I was new and I wanted the experience of seeing areas I hadn’t seen before, so I kept my pace going west.
Perhaps tomorrow I’ll join them, I thought.
As I was jogging, I saw a straggler from the crowd of joggers, and then as I neared him, I saw that he was jogging barefoot like me, but before I reached him, he stumbled and fell face first into the sand, then sat up quickly looking around, embarrassed that someone had seen him, I thought.
“Can I help you?”
He pulled out his plugs and stared up at me with a smile. “I think I’ll be okay. It’s probably just an ankle sprain, but once I get to my house I should be fine.”
“I can help you, my name is Chase and I live over there,” I said, extending my hand to him and then pointing to the east. Before I could explain that it wasn’t my place, he was standing with his legs wobbling a bit, which caused him to reach for my shoulder. He held on as he glanced down at me and grimaced, obviously from the pain of pressure put on his ankle.
He stood six feet tall, wide shoulders, small waist, a tall handsome man with a strong jawline, green eyes, and dark reddish-blond hair pulled back into a long ponytail. He definitely was a stunner.
“See it’s okay,” the handsome man of about thirty-five said to me. My name is Nicky. I live here,” he said, raising his chin to indicate that he was at home. “It’s a good thing I fell literally in front of my door.”
I glanced up and his home was as impressive as Max’s, with a glass balcony, and panoramic windows surrounding the bottom structure. Nicky’s Malibu home was only two floors and wasn’t as large as Max’s huge picturesque home with three floors, six bedrooms, and six baths, nor was it as overstated.
“Can I get your wife or children to see to you?”
“There’s no wife or children. I’m a bachelor. A confirmed bachelor,” he said, emphasizing confirmed with light in his eyes, as if he’d been proud that he’d never married, or thought of the notion of marriage. “Just give me a hand and I think I’ll be okay.”
I placed his arm over my shoulder. “You’re strong for such a thin young man and you have muscles on that beautiful frame.”