by Jana Petken
When everyone was settled, Dai set off on a journey that would take at least an hour. Susan and Minnie sat on the makeshift bench in the back of the van, which had been specially constructed for the occasion. Sitting up front, Danny and Jenny squeezed tightly together in a seat meant for one.
Dai, driving carefully through the town, began the first civil conversation that Danny had ever had with him. “So you know that the last of the Frongoch prisoners were released on Christmas Eve?”
Danny nodded. “I read about that in the newspaper. It must have been grand for their families to see them turn up in Dublin on Christmas Day. What happens to the camp now?”
“It’s been shut down, and there are no plans to reopen it, as far as I’m aware.”
“I’m sorry. What will you do now?”
Dai’s mouth set in a grim line.
“Are you all right?” Danny asked.
“Not really. I’ve been conscripted into the army. I got called up on the second of January.”
Danny said nothing.
“My da has already filled out the papers for exemption. As Anna might have told you, our brother Tom was killed in France. I’m the only breadwinner left. My da might look strong, but he’s not fit to work as he used to be. We’ve managed to sell the stock from the canteen, and we kept as much food as we could, but nothing seems to last very long when there are four mouths to feed. I have my first hearing at the local tribunal next week.
“What are your grounds?”
“Domestic hardship in the family. The good news is that I’ve been taken on by the coal mine in Llanuwchllyn. It’s not far from Bala. Da thinks that if I already have a job that’s supporting the family, I’ll have a good chance of keeping it. I would go to war, you know – I’m not a coward.”
“Of course you’re not, dear,” Minnie said from the back seat. “What man wouldn’t want to fight for his country? I was reading just the other day about those men who object to going in the army because it bothers their consciences. I really don’t know what to make of that. I’m sure their consciences would be in an even worse state if they saw Germans patrolling the streets of London.”
“That will never happen, Mother,” Susan said.
“I wouldn’t be so sure, dear. We seem to be taking one foot forwards and another back,” Minnie suggested. “Don’t get me wrong, Dai. I’m not against your appeal. I’ve heard of plenty of legitimate tribunals going on all over England. I know of many cases where clergymen, teachers, and munitions workers have been given exemption papers. After all, we can’t have families starving or children not learning because they don’t have teachers. And we need men at home to supervise the munitions factories, keep our industries going, and to dig out coal for our army.”
“And for our parlour,” Susan said.
Rolling her eyes, Minnie continued. “If you ask me, letting the country go to rack and ruin because all of its workers are away fighting could end up being worse than losing the war to the Germans.”
“Like the song,” Jenny said.
Danny asked, “What song?”
“‘Keep the Home Fires Burning’. Honestly, Danny, everyone knows that one.”
After introductions and a short visit to the church to meet the parish priest, the Carmodys were invited to a lamb stew at Anna’s home. Then the women retired to a house three doors down from the Walters’s.
Danny had not been able to speak to Anna in private. Ushered out by 8 p.m., he was told that it was bad luck to see the bride after that time. He wasn’t sure who had set a specific hour on that rule, but nonetheless he attempted to endear himself to Arthur by agreeing with almost everything he said at dinner, on every subject.
Later that night, Danny lay on a couch in a neighbour’s house and mulled over what might happen after the wedding. Anna was expecting to live in London. Her bags were already packed, and her mother had shed a few tears at dinner because she was losing her daughter. Anna was happy about the move. Earlier she’d spoken to Jenny about the possibility of finding employment. He was all for his wife working, if that was what she wanted. She’d needed an occupation while she waited for him, and earning money was never a bad thing. But he was not returning to Greenwich. Instead, he was going straight to Nottingham to some camp that had been built for new recruits. And while he was being marched up and down and taught drills, tactics, and how to fire weapons, which he’d already done, Anna might leave her home for a house full of strangers in a city she didn’t know. That might not be such a good idea.
Unable to sleep with his mind doing somersaults, he tried to picture nice things. He was eager to be married and for the two days of bliss that were coming after the wedding party. Anna’s suggestion of a cabin by a lake had conjured up so many glorious images that he could hardly contain himself. He just hoped that he’d get it right the first time around. What a disaster it would be if he behaved like a fumbling eejit in front of his bride. He was being ridiculous, he thought, worrying about something that might just prove to be the best experience he’d ever had in his life. But what if he hurt her or couldn’t get his John Thomas to stand to attention at a crucial time? She’d never look at him in the same way again.
He grumbled as his thoughts involuntarily shifted back to the war and more serious matters. Minnie had heard from a neighbour’s grandson who’d just come home on leave that the British blockades were beginning to work. The Germans were starving, according to the man, and he was convinced that the war would be over within the next six months. Danny calculated that his training might last for at least a couple of those months. That might be more than enough time to push the Huns all the way back to Berlin. Anna wouldn’t be too upset with him when he told her that bit of news, would she?
Chapter Forty-Seven
She’s my wife. Danny looked up at the ceiling and repeated the words aloud. “She’s my wife.” Gently he pushed Anna’s lustrous black hair from her forehead and then kissed her there. He gazed at her beautiful dark eyes sparkling in the candlelight. Her skin, so smooth and unblemished, was tinged pink, and her well-kissed lips were still swollen with passion. She had the face of a cherub.
All the nervousness was gone. It had dissolved the moment he’d kissed her. Her naked body had felt like silk to the touch, and when he saw that secret place, open to him like the gates of heaven, it had been like going home.
“Aw, darlin’, that was a wonderful ending to the happiest day of my life. I’m still seeing stars and glorious golden lights dancing in front of my eyes, and my body is tingling all over, as though God himself is sprinkling it with joy.”
Anna laughed and snuggled her head against his bare chest. “You say the strangest things, Danny.”
“Did I hurt you? Are you bleeding? Did I please you, sweetheart?”
“No – yes, for a second, but then it was perfect,” she sighed. “You were perfect.”
Danny smiled in the darkness. Thank God. He and his John Thomas had done themselves proud.
“Are you happy, Anna?”
“So happy, my love. I never imagined my ring would be gold or that we’d have this beautiful place to ourselves. It’s all so extravagant. Are you sure you can afford this?”
“I’m as sure as a saint going up to paradise. Nothing is too good for my wife.” He’d spent a lot more than he’d intended, but he was going away, and this made everything that little bit more special. She was worth it. The wedding had gone off without a hitch. There hadn’t been a bad word between anyone. He’d been a bit taken aback in the church when he saw some of the old guards from Frognoch in attendance, but they’d been friendly enough at the party afterwards. Not one of them mentioned the camp in front of Mam or their granny. He supposed it was all water under the bridge now.
“Did you see my mam dancing with your dad? Who’d have thought it, eh?” Danny said. “Sure, I haven’t seen my mam smile that much since before my own dad died. It was a pleasure to watch her. And Jenny laughing like she used to. Did you see som
e of the admiring glances she got from some of your Welshmen?”
“I did. Oh, Danny, I like her very much. She and I will get on like a house on fire when we get to London. She’s very outspoken for a woman. She certainly put my Dai in his place when he mentioned the evils of women being in employment.”
“That sounds like her. Ah, Anna, she’s been through so much. She made a real effort, coming to our wedding and looking happy.”
“Imagine surviving a Zeppelin attack. We’ve never seen one up here.”
“I hope you never do.”
“My da likes your family, you know. He’s not as upset about me leaving for London as my mam is. He won’t admit it, but he knows I’m in good hands under your granny’s roof.”
Danny felt his face redden with guilt. Not wanting her to say any more about going to London, he tilted her face with his fingers and kissed her into silence. They made love again, and all thoughts of deceit melted away.
Dai collected Danny and Anna and took them back to Bala. Danny had still not told Anna about the army. He’d been quiet all morning, afraid to speak, to say the words that would break the beautiful spell they were both under.
He didn’t know how to begin the conversation, but he started to panic one mile from her house.
“Dai, stop the van. Be a good man and let me have five minutes alone with my wife, will you?” he asked.
“Why do I have to stop?”
Danny glanced at Anna, sitting beside him. She already looked worried.
“Because we’re just about to have our first fight,” Danny answered Dai. “And I won’t blame you if you try to kill me again with this van.”
Both the Watkins and Carmodys greeted the bride and groom at the front door. Anna ran straight up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door shut. Danny strode into the parlour, arms folded defensively, ready to take what was coming to him. Dai, who had heard Danny’s news and witnessed Anna’s tears at the side of a road, was tight-lipped as he too went into the parlour and leaned quietly against a wall.
Danny focused on Arthur and Edna. By the looks on their faces, his family already knew what was going on. Minnie was glaring at him with her I told you so look.
Marching into the room behind Danny, Arthur’s expression was both puzzled and angry. “Out with it, you. What the bloody hell have you done to my daughter?”
Anna’s weeping was so loud that it penetrated the ceiling. In two long strides, Arthur was upon Danny, gripping him by the jacket lapels and pushing him up against the wall.
“If you’ve hurt my Anna, I’ll rip your throat through your mouth!”
“Da, stop it!” Dai shouted.
Minnie screeched, “Unhand my grandson, ya big bully! None of this is his fault. He’s just found out that he’s going in the army, for Gawd’s sake!”
Arthur let go and took a step backwards. A surprised look crossed his face. “When did you find that out?” he asked.
“I got the letter a couple of days before we came up here,” he lied.
Susan went to Danny’s side. “He didn’t want to spoil Anna’s special day. He kept it a secret for her sake. You can’t blame him for that or for doing his duty for the country. We’re all upset about this. I’ve lost my husband, one son to the navy, and now Danny …” Susan wrapped her arms around Danny’s neck and began to cry. Her broken-hearted sobs drowned out Anna’s weeping upstairs and brought a tear to Edna’s eyes.
“Mr Walters, I really must go to Anna,” Danny said, gently pushing Susan away when she had calmed down.
Surprisingly, Arthur stepped aside to let Danny pass. Then Arthur went into the hallway and put on his coat and cap. “Dai, we’re going to the pub. I’ve no stomach for this carry-on.”
Upstairs, Danny stood outside the bedroom door. Not waiting to be told to go away, he said nothing, turned the doorknob, and went in uninvited.
Anna lay on top of the bed, curled up in a ball, face streaked with tears. “Go away,” she sobbed.
“I love you, Anna. Forgive me.”
“I hate this war. I hate it!”
“We all do.” Danny put hesitant hands on her shoulders and forced her to look at him. He had apologised for keeping the news to himself, but he couldn’t say sorry for going into the army, not when millions of other husbands were doing the same thing. He would sound ridiculous.
“Darlin’, I know we’ve been talking about London, but now that you know I won’t be going there, I think it might be for the best if you stay here with your family until I get back home to you.”
For the first time, Danny saw Anna’s forehead furrowing with angry lines. Her poor face was blotchy and swollen with tears, and her beautiful soft lips were pursed in anger. She looked quite unlike herself.
“I can’t believe you let me talk about going down South with you and you said nothing!” she shouted. “And you, gushing about our wonderful life together, starting right now. That’s a laugh, isn’t it? Well, you listen to me. I am your wife, and I’m going to go to your home. I’m not staying here as though nothing has changed. That would be as if I never got married. I’d just be the same Anna Walters that I’ve always been, taking orders from my da and darning Dai’s smelly socks.”
“You will be safer here …”
“Oh, shut up, will you! Safe, says he going to war – I don’t care about being safe. I’ll die of boredom in this village!”
“You’re just upset.”
“It’s more than just being upset. It’s the disappointment of not having my new life with you. And then there’s your sister. She’s opened my eyes. I want to find employment and live in London. She told me about all the sights and great parks.”
As her husband, he could forbid her, if she’d let him speak, Danny thought.
“I’m going, and that’s the end of it,” Anna continued. “I’ll stay in your bedroom and wait for you, if I have to. I’ll do whatever I’m told while under your granny’s roof, and I’ll be a good daughter to your mother, but I am not staying here. And if you dare to get yourself killed, I’ll never forgive you!”
Danny felt a surge of passion the likes of which he’d never known. Kissing her deeply, he felt her swooning with pleasure in his arms. Within minutes, he was lying on top of her; then she welcomed him, and he was inside her, hearing nothing but the sound of his own voice moaning in ecstasy.
Chapter Forty-Eight
May 1917
Not a bit of ground was visible on the platforms of London’s Victoria Station. A sea of men wearing uniforms of green, blue, and brown, in addition to greatcoats and caps, and carrying kitbags, thronged both outside and inside the sprawling railway station. Jenny gasped in dismay. How the bloody hell were she and Anna to find Danny in this mayhem?
Thousands of soldiers and sailors had arrived from numerous training camps all over England, but they were not the only troops in the station. Thousands more were arriving on trains, having just come back home on leave. The urgency in the air was almost tangible.
The newspapers were full of stories about surges, battles, big pushes into enemy territory, and lists naming the dead. The French city of Arras, previously unheard of by the average British person, was now on everyone’s lips. Finally something was happening – a drive to push the Germans back, to take ground that they had held since the beginning of the war. God help all the soldiers, she thought, still looking for Danny. They appeared to be ready and raring to go to war; she was seeing enough rifles to shoot up half of London. But although they marched into conflict with smiles on their faces and seemingly eager hearts to serve their nation, she guessed that not even the bravest of men would be prepared for the horrible death that might find them at the front. She probably knew more about being wounded in war than any of the raw recruits did, and she saw nothing splendidly patriotic or noble about it. There was only pain.
Stretching the length and breadth of the tracks, men laughed and joked as they headed for the trains. Tramping the ground with heavy boots and with rif
les and kitbags over their shoulders, some were so weighed down by accoutrements that she wondered how they could walk any distance at all. They had haversacks strapped onto their backs. Some carried medical kits full of shell dressings; she knew very well what they looked like. Most wore bayonet frogs on their belts, and there were officers with shiny badges on their caps, looking especially grand with swords tucked into shiny leather belts.
Making the place even more crowded and chaotic were women wearing their Sunday best and dragging or carrying screaming children. They were blocking the entrance to the main platforms, rushing all at once to get to the trains. The noise was deafening, tempers were flaring, and everyone seemed to be frantically searching for husbands, brothers, fathers, and sons.
Anna and Jenny pushed their way through the throng in an attempt to find Danny before he boarded. Jenny suggested that they keep their heads down, link arms, and although it would appear very unladylike, shove the heavy load of people out of their way with their combined weight. They had made it this far, Jenny told Anna, who was struggling to keep up, and they would not go home without seeing and speaking to Danny.
At the entrance to the main platform, Jenny realised that no matter how hard they tried, they probably wouldn’t have sufficient time to check all the carriages’ windows before the trains departed. Too many people were taller, stronger, and looking capable and willing to knock the more fragile aside for daring to surge forwards. They may as well go back home, she thought.
“We’ll never see him from here!” she shouted to Anna.
“We have to try. I’m not leaving!” Anna shouted back.
Jenny felt like screaming with frustration. She couldn’t hear most of what Anna was saying. This situation was scaring her. Ever since losing half her hearing, she had lived in a world with soft voices. All this noise was too much for her. She was shaking from head to foot. The racket was hurting her head. It was utter chaos, and eventually they’d get trampled.